Note Writing
by EdwardAteJames'Cookie
Summary: Alice won't speak, not to anyone. Everyone calls her a freak and she doesn't fit in. But when new student Jasper comes, and Alice meets Bella something different sparks inside of Alice. But is that what stopped her talking in the first place? Slighty OOC
1. Meeting

Meeting

Someone pushed me as I walked past, my head down, and I fell to the floor with a cry of pain. "Weirdo!" I heard them call as they ran away. I fought hard to stop the tears from leaking out of my blue eyes. I got up and started to walk again, only to have someone spray water at me. Soaking and with a bruise blooming on my knee, I stumbled to AP Calculus. I was already five minutes late.

"Alice Brandon!" shouted Mr Hardwicke. "Take a tardy slip." I took the small piece of paper and I heard someone snigger. I could feel my cheeks turning bright red.

Some people say that High School is the best time of a person's life. I sure hope not. Not when every day I get pushed and hit and generally picked on.

My name is Alice Mary Brandon. I'm 4"10. I've got short spiky hair. Blue eyes. Nothing too outlandish. Just Alice. But, people still find reasons to pick on me.

It started when I first started at High School. I hadn't been to school for a long time. I'd been…ill for a while, and school just wasn't possible when you're shut in a 10x10 hospital room. All I saw was white for six years. White walls, white bed linen, white flowers. High school was a bit of a culture shock. The friends I'd had when I was nine didn't remember me that well. I was just a girl they used to know. I hadn't made new friends for a while. I wouldn't speak. My only experience of people was with doctors. My parents had stopped talking to me long ago, when I stopped talking back.

The bell rang out loudly and I gathered up my books quickly, trying to get to English before people could cause any more damage. I failed. Someone managed to stick gum to my skirt. I sighed and carefully picked it off. I examined the fabric. There was no sticky residue left behind. I carried on to English like nothing had happened. But someone stuck their leg out and I tripped, going head first into a water fountain and hitting my head. Hard. This time I couldn't hold back the tears. Salty water streamed down my face, until I couldn't see anymore.

"Hey," someone whispered, crouching down in front of me. "Are you okay?" I nodded and they took my hand and pulled me up. I swayed a little. "I think we should take you to the nurse," he sounded worried. I shook my head and started walking. "Hey! Wait!" I heard footsteps behind me and I stopped. It would be worse if I ran, it always was. But no hurt came. Instead, the sweet voice whispered into my ear: "I really think you should go and see the nurse," I shook my head vigorously. What would she do? She'd just send me back to lessons again. No one wanted me to take up their time. "Why not?" he asked. I raised my eyebrows. "I see your point. Kind of. I'm Jasper. I'm new here. What's your name?" I rolled my eyes. New kid. He'd soon find out that it would be best if he didn't talk to me at all. "Do you… Do you speak?" I shrugged. But the answer was no. No. Never. My speech therapist was getting desperate. But I would not utter a word, not for her or for anyone. I preferred living in my head.

I turned to the boy who wouldn't leave me alone. I gasped. He was… there was no other word for it, beautiful. He had startling blue eyes that sparkled every time he blinked and soft blonde hair that fell into them.

"What class have you got?" he asked me. I sighed and handed him my schedule. He looked at it and smiled. "English, same as me. Come one, I'll walk with you."

The journey to English was silent. The way I liked it.

"Brandon!" Mrs Richards shouted as soon as I stepped in the door. "You're tardy, again. And who are you?"  
"I'm Jasper Whitlock ma'am," the boy said. "And, ma'am it wasn't her fault, she found me lost and showed me the way."

"Even so, Mr Whitlock, tardy is tardy. I'll let you off because it's your first day, but never again, do you understand?"

"Yes ma'am." he said quickly.

"Mr Whitlock, I'm sure you had a very different way of living in Texas, but here in Biloxi, we do not call our teachers ma'am. You will call me Mrs Richards, understand?"

"Yes ma-Mrs Richards."  
"Thank you Mr Whitlock. Now please take a seat next to Miss Brandon." Jasper walked towards me and sat next to me. He pulled a piece of paper from the centre of his notebook and wrote something on it. He handed it to me.

_Dragon Lady huh?_

I had to suppress my giggles. I wrote a message back.

_Yep. Wait until she gets angry._

_She wasn't angry then? Oh crap. So, Miss Brandon. Are you going to tell me your first name?_

_Alice. _

_It suits you. It's short and sweet. _

_You don't even know me. _

_I know you more than you think. You get bullied, maybe because you don't speak? You have a lot of money, but aren't necessarily looked after. You don't sleep much. You're clever, but the teachers don't favour you like some of the geeks. They think you're being deliberately insolent by not speaking._

_How do you know all that? You a stalker or something?_

_Maybe. Or maybe, the first one I witnessed earlier, I know you have a lot of money because your bag is Prada, you're not looked after because your jumper is on back to front. Any caring parent would have noticed that. Unless they work early?_

I glanced down at my jumper, embarrassed. I pulled it off and put it on the right way. I carried on reading the note.

_I know you don't sleep much because you have dark circles underneath your eyes. And I know you're clever because you're note taking word for word what Dragon Lady says, before she even says it. But she doesn't like you, hence the tardy slip. And the shouting. _

_Maybe I should hire you as my shrink. You'd certainly be better than 'Rachel'._

_There you go, I know you see a shrink called Rachel. _

_So, why are you talking to me? I'm the freak. The weirdo. _

_You don't seem weird to me. You're a nice person Alice. People just don't see beneath the silence. _

The paper was whisked out of my hand and crumpled into a ball. I looked up to see Mrs Richards looming over us, a terrifying expression on her face. When did she stop talking? Surely I would have noticed. I was taking notes.

"Maybe yourself and Mr Whitlock would like to carry on your discussion down in the principal's office." She sneered.

"That won't be necessary Mrs Richards," soothed Jasper. He seemed to have extraordinary influence over her because she just said:  
"Don't let it happen again," and she walked away, a confused look on her face.

The bell rang and I gathered my books together. Jasper did the same, and followed me out of the classroom.

"I have History next. What about you?" he asked. I nodded to show I had the same. He walked beside me to class, and amazingly, no one touched me. Jasper was like my shield. People stared at him instead of me, the amazingly gorgeous new guy. He was placed beside me in History and as soon as he discovered we were studying the civil war, his face lit up. No notes were passed in the lesson; Jasper merely drank in every word the teacher was saying, not even bothering to make notes.

Fourth period equalled no Jasper. Strangely, even though we had known each other for not even half a day, I felt I needed him. He was like a drug; even though I had only had a small dose I had become immediately addicted. The worst thing was, I was sure that in the last period, he would have made at least one friend. Where did that leave me? Sitting at the lunch table alone like always.

But as I slid into an empty seat, someone did the same next to me. I was immediately dazzled by Jasper's white smile.

"Hey Alice!" he exclaimed, as if he was really excited to see me. I was beginning to think this was some kind of joke. I frowned and pulled out my notebook, flipping the cover back.

_Hey _I wrote _Now it's my turn Jasper Whitlock._

_Your turn to what?_

_To read you. _

_Read me?  
Uh huh. Nope, can't do it. You're too hard to read. Tell me about yourself. _

_I was born in Texas. I…wasn't exactly what you'd call the perfect child. When I was twelve, my parents sent me to military school. I was meant to hate it, meant to realise how grateful I should be. But I loved it. I loved the drills, the uniform, the discipline. It just felt natural to me. I wanted to be a soldier. But as soon as my parents realised this, they pulled me out. They don't want me to go to war, to fight for my country. They love me, and want to keep me safe. Just like they did when they sent me to military school in the first place. And it did help. I learned discipline, something I never really experienced when my parents had lots of money and left me with a nanny all day. They work full time, so they couldn't stay and look after me. My nanny was a pushover. _

I laughed at the thought of a five year old Jasper wreaking havoc whilst a nanny cried protests. He smiled at me and scrawled something else on the bottom of the paper.

_Your laugh is beautiful. _I stared at him.

**AN: Oh, I loved writing that! And as much as I shouldn't be making more stories now, I have to upload this one. I love it. I'll try to update the others as well!**** I've actually written quite a lot of this story already, and I love it to bits. I know Alice may seem a little out of character now, but she gets into her character through the story. **


	2. Park

**A little disclaimer to say:: I do not own Twilight. Neither do you. Unless you're Stephenie Meyer… In which case…Hi Stephenie!!!**

Park

I slammed the door of my car behind me and stomped up the path, ignoring the sun that beat down on my neck. The air was filled with hot moisture, and it made it difficult to concentrate, but I pulled my head out of its daze and tried to think straight. I could never afford to go into a daydream. I pushed my keys into the door and pushed it open. I could hear shouting straight away and I sighed. I walked straight to the stairs, not even bothering to find out what it was all about. I already knew.

I found Cynthia sitting at the top of the staircase, her thumb in her mouth and a concerned expression upon her tiny face. I sat beside her and put my arm around her. She put her head on my shoulder and smiled up at me. Cynthia was the only person in my family who didn't wonder why I wouldn't talk. Not that she ever remembered me talking. She was only just six months when I went into hospital.

"They hurt my ears," she whispered. I squeezed her shoulder and took her hand, leading her into my room. I skipped over to her room where I found the High School Musical soundtrack and then returned to mine, slipping it into my CD player. She shrieked in delight, and burbled along to the words. I dug my iPod out of my bag and turned the music up as loud as it would go, so it wouldn't merge with the warbles of Troy and Gabriella.

It was a while before I noticed the shouting had stopped. The two sets of music were too loud for either of us to even realise. But my mother was standing at the door, frowning at me. I looked at her pointedly. She sighed, picked Cynthia up and took her out of the room. I had to try hard to stop myself from crying. I knew why she didn't want Cynthia with me. She thought I was a bad influence. The crazy girl who wouldn't speak.

Mom and Dad argued constantly about what to do with me. Whether to send me back to the hospital. But I wasn't crazy. I just wouldn't speak. Not to them, not to anybody. Not even to Cynthia.

I turned on my laptop and flicked to my always empty inbox. Except…it wasn't empty. One unread email sat in the empty space. The name made my heart soar and flutter. I clicked on it and read.

_Hey Alice!_

_Meet me at 6pm at Rider's Park. Please. Bring your notebook. _

_Love Jasper x_

I glanced at the clock hanging over my bed and gasped. It was ten to six. I grabbed my bag and stuck my notebook inside it. I ran for the door, but as soon as my hand was on it, I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Alice, where are you going?" my father asked. I quickly ripped a page of my notebook out, scribbled on it and thrust it at him.

_Meeting Jasper. Be back at 8. _

I ran out of the door before he could ask any more questions. The park was a fifteen minute walk, but I knew I could get there quicker if I ran. So I did. By the time I was at the park, my face was bright red. I heard someone laugh and I span around, locking my arms around my torso.

"It's okay, it's me." Jasper soothed. "Did you run all the way here?" I nodded, gasping for breath. "I wanted to talk more, and well… I'm a little impatient. Sorry if I dragged you away from anything." He looked down at his feet, but I shook my head vigorously. We sat down on a park bench and I scrawled a note on the pad.

_My life isn't exactly filled with parties. How did you get my email? _He laughed.

"You dropped this on your way out of school," he held up my school diary and I remembered that my email was written neatly on the front page, so that I wouldn't forget it. I smiled and took it off him, stuffing it in my bag. "So, why don't you speak?"  
_I haven't spoken since I was ten. _I wrote, hoping that he wouldn't press me. He didn't. I bit my lip, but a strangled sob still escaped my mouth. Before I knew it, tears were streaming down my cheeks and Jasper's arms were wound tight around my body.

"Shush," he whispered in my ear. "It's okay. I'm here," I laid my head on his shoulder and he stroked my short hair. We sat like that for a while.

"Hey, you're the new kid aren't you?" a high voice trilled from somewhere above me. "Jasper isn't it?" Jasper looked up at the girl.

"Yes," he said hesitantly.

"I'm Maria, this is Nettie and Lucy." She gestured to the two blonde girls behind her. "You should come and hang out with us." She gave me a look to show that I wasn't invited. I didn't need a look. Maria was the most popular girl in school. There was no way I'd ever be invited anywhere with her. Jasper didn't miss the glare.

"I'm hanging out with Alice right now," he said coldly. Maria narrowed her eyes.

"Well, if you want some _fun_ then come and see me. Me and a _loud _crowd meet up almost every night near the playground." She twisted a string of dark hair around her finger, giggled and flounced off, tailed by Lucy and Nettie.

"You okay?" Jasper asked me. I nodded furiously. Why did Jasper want to hang around with me when he could be basking in popularity with the most beautiful girls in the school? I tried to forget about the last conversation and started to scrawl in my notebook again.

_So do you have any brothers or sisters?_

_I have a twin sister, Rosalie; she also joined the school today. And I have a younger brother, Edward. He's four. What about you?  
Six year old sister. Her name is Cynthia. She's the best. But… well, my mom doesn't really like me being with her. She's quiet and shy with everyone but mom, dad and me, and mom thinks she'll turn out like me, not speaking. _

_Must be pretty tough. Do your parents give you a hard time about the silence thing?_

_My mom more than my dad. But he won't even speak to me anymore, not properly. It's like I'm not there. They think because I won't speak to them, I'm not there. Just an empty shell. But I am here. And it hurts. I wish I was an empty shell sometimes, devoid of all emotion. _I didn't know why I was telling Jasper this. But it felt good. I'd never told my parents the reason I had stopped talking, the reason that I had been so ill in the first place. They had tried to get it out of me, but I wasn't going to tell anyone. Not even the perfect angel who sat in front of me.

_That's kind of depressing, you know that? _He scribbled. I gave him a faint smile. I paused before I wrote the next thing on the piece of paper. I was scared of his rejection.

_Do you want to come back to my house for dinner? My parents would be so pleased if I brought a __friend home. _

"Alice…" he put a hand on my shoulder. "I would love to. But I have a curfew to stick to and seeing how it's already eight thirty…" Oh crap. I stood up quickly, Jasper jumping backwards at the sudden movement.

_Meant to be back by eight! _I scribbled on the pad in large letters. I grabbed my bag and the notebook and started to power-walk home. It was about a minute before I realised Jasper was beside me, grinning.

"Want me to walk you home?" he asked. "Explain to your parents why I've kept you out past your eight o'clock curfew?" I nodded gently. He very carefully took my hand in his and I felt a jolt of electricity pass through my fingers. Our eyes met, and we both looked away at the same time. I could feel the blush creeping up my face.

The rest of the walk was silent, even on Jasper's end. By the time we got to my house it was quarter to nine. I screwed up my face and knocked on the door. It was flung open.

"Where the hell have you been?" my father thundered. "You don't tell me where you're going, just that you're meeting up with some guy and that you'll be back by eight. Well it isn't eight is it? And it's not like you know any…" he trailed off as he saw Jasper. "Who are you?" he said rudely.

"Jasper Whitlock sir," Jasper said, stepping forwards to shake my father's hand. Dad ignored the outstretched arm and turned back to me.

"Next time, tell me where you're going," he growled and he stomped inside.

"Bye Alice," Jasper said to me, and he pulled me into a hug. He stepped away quickly, as though he had only done it as a reflex action. I waggled my fingers at him, and he walked back down the path, smiling sadly.

I stepped inside and closed the door behind me. I leant against it and I smiled. I smiled the biggest smile my face had shaped in six years.

**AN:  
Aww, so do you like it? Wrote this during extensive Cadbury's giant chocolate button eating. They were very yummy :D I'm starting to bring in more twilight characters ******** Ooooo I just got so scared. I went on my computer and ALL of my files were gone. I had a massive freak out. I turned the computer off and on again, but they were still gone. But I logged in to another user and searched for my documents and I found them!!! Now all my fanfics are saved to my memory stick! Thanks to my first reviewers:**

**LuckyCharms19**

**Move over Alice Jasper's mine (Love your name by the way XD)**

**Keira**

**Nattikur Cullen**

**Emmelie Cullen**

**SilverAngel1234**

**Flamepelt3377**

**ALICECULLENSBESTFRIEND**

**You are all amazing!! Oooo I had the best dream last night!! Robert Pattinson came around to my house. And he needed a place to stay so I told him I had an extra flat (???) across town (I don't even live in town) and he was really cool and I was talking to me loads and then my alarm woke me up before anything romantic could happen ******** Sorry about the huge authors note, I talk too much!!**

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Press the button!

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	3. Little

**Disclaimer: Sadly I do not own Jasper :( Nor do I own Alice, Bella, Maria, Nettie, Lucy, Charlie, Billy, Emmett, Lauren, Esme, Edward or Rosalie. Or Twilight. I wish. **

Little

"OI! You!" Maria called out. I put my head down walking faster. I let my spiky hair fall into my face. "Freak!" I felt a hand roughly spin me around and I cried out in pain. Maria stood in front of me, a grin stretched across her beautiful face, Nettie and Lucy flanking her sides. "Stay away from Jasper," she hissed. "He's mine. If you think he's going to fancy a little weirdo like you, then you're wrong aren't you. Dead wrong. And you'll be dead if you so much touch him again. Understand?" I whimpered and nodded.

I carried on walking, trying to hold the hot tears in my eyes.

"Alice!" someone called. I shut my eyes, walking faster. I could hear Jasper's footsteps as he caught up with me. "Hey whirlwind!" I was sobbing internally as I scribbled quickly on my notepad.

_Go away Jasper_. He looked at me, hurt and stopped in his tracks, letting me walk on. Tears started to fall down my face. But being with Jasper would make it all worse. Being hated by Maria was being hated by everyone. More than usual.

I decided I would skip class. I couldn't bear to see Jasper. I couldn't see his wonderful face, all the proportions perfect. I didn't want to be drawn to his soft blonde hair, dazzled by his startling blue eyes. I just wanted to be me. Silent, lonely Alice.

I went to the park the Jasper and I had sat in the night before. I found our bench and sat down, gazing up at the azure sky. I frowned, clouds were seeping into view at the horizon. It would be raining soon.

"Scuse me," said a little voice. "Can I be your friend?" I looked down, to where the voice came from. A girl stood in front of me, she was about four or five. She had brown hair that trailed halfway down her back and beautiful chocolate eyes. She was wearing a pink dress, but she pulled and tugged at it like she hated it. "I'm Bella, I'm four years old," she announced proudly. "What's your name?" I pulled out my notebook and wrote my name on it. "A-l-i-c-e," she said slowly. "Al-Al-Ali-Alike?" I shook my head, giggling. I wrote it different for her. She read it out letter by letter again. "A-l-i-s-e. Alise?" I nodded. She had the pronunciation right at least, even though I probably just messed up her spelling. "How old are you?" she asked. I put up ten fingers, then six. She concentrated hard, working out the math. "Sixteen?" I nodded. "Do you talk?" I shook my head. "Oh well, I don't like talking either." She hoisted herself on to the bench next to me and stared across the huge field. She was silent for several minutes and I wondered if she was getting bored. But she seemed happy enough.

_Your mummy?_ I wrote on the notebook. She looked at it, confused and sounded out the letters. She finally got it right.

"I don't live with mummy. She lives in Fee-nix. I live with Daddy. Mummy is with Phil. Phil plays baseball. I don't like baseball. It's hard." As if to prove her point, she got off the bench and pretended to swing a bat with her hands. It threw her off balance and she fell on her bum. Her bottom lip jutted out and floor, the tears disappeared. "I got lost." She said simply. Any other child would be distraught by this, but Bella didn't seem to mind. "Daddy was talking to Billy and I went to play. And I couldn't find Daddy again." I set her feet back on the ground and took her hand.

I started to walk towards the playground. This seemed the most obvious place that her father would look for her. As soon as we got there, we heard someone shouting Bella's name.

"Emmy!" she shouted, running in the direction of the voice. I followed. I felt strangely attached to Bella, like I knew she would someday be my friend. When she came into view again, she was squealing and being held upside down by the ankles. "Emmy put me down!" she protested. "I'm getting dizzy!"

"You're always dizzy Bells," a huge guy said. He was tall and muscular, maybe a year or so older than me. He grinned at me. "Thanks for finding her. We were so worried."  
"This is my new friend, Alice!" Bella chirruped. "She doesn't talk!"  
"You don't?" the boy asked. I shook my head. "I'm Emmett, I'm Bella's brother" he said. I smiled faintly.

_I haven't seen you before. _I wrote on a page in my notebook. _Do you go to school here?_

He laughed. "No, I've been to boarding school all my life. But I wanted to come home and go to school here. So my parents agreed and I'm starting school here on Monday. Dad was so pleased. We haven't got on since the divorce, Bella was two months old when it happened, so she doesn't remember. I haven't visited Dad since, I only ever saw Bells when she went to visit Mom. But I decided that maybe it was time to end the grudge. Anyway, it will be nice to know someone when I start."

_I'm not the best person to know _I wrote. He laughed his big booming laugh again.

"Alice, do I look like I care? You seem nice to me. Different than some stuck up slag. Anyway, I just told you my whole life. I can't hang out with anyone else now can I?" I giggled.

"Isn't Emmy cool?" gushed Bella. "He scares me when he hangs me upside down though! He's seventeen. So big!" Emmett laughed.

"As you can see, Bella missed me."  
"Lots and lots and lots and lots!" Bella giggled.

"Bella!" someone exclaimed and a man ran over to Bella and scooped her up in his arms. "Don't you ever do that to me again young lady!"

_Gonna go, _I scribbled and showed it to Emmett. _See you on Monday_.

"Bye!" he called as I walked away. I frowned. Why was I suddenly making friends? I hadn't ever talked to a stranger before Jasper. Not that I would talk to anyone.

Lauren Mallory from up the road ran past me on the way home. She pushed me over.

"Freak!" she shouted.

"Hey!" came another angry voice from behind me. I looked up. A young woman was standing hand in hand with a little boy with bronze hair, glaring at Lauren's retreating back. She ran over to me. "You okay sweetie?" she asked. I nodded, glancing down at my cut palms. "Come on, my house is across the road, I'll get you cleaned up," she said softly. I shook my head, but her grip was firm and she led me over to a big house. I gaped. It was huge, and so beautiful.

She took me into a huge kitchen and sat me at the breakfast bar. She reached into a cupboard and pulled out a packet of band aids. "I'm Esme by the way," she said, taking my hands and carefully running them under a tap. Once they were clean she put the band aids on. I got up and started towards the door. "Hey, wait!" she called. I turned back to her. "What's your name sweetheart?" she asked. "Do you want me to call your parents and tell them what happened?" I shook my head and wrote on my pad: _Alice_.  
"What does it say mommy?" whispered the little boy.

"It says Alice dear," Esme whispered.

"I'm Edward! I'm four," he said proudly. The cogs started to whir in my brain, and suddenly I knew where I was. At that moment, the door slammed and an all too familiar voice called:  
"Mom! We're home!"

"I'm in the kitchen!" Esme called back. My breathing quickened and Esme looked at me strangely. Jasper walked into the room, followed by the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.

"Alice!" Jasper exclaimed. His eyes flashed to the band aids on my hands. "What happened to you."

"You know each other?" Esme said, confused. I nodded sadly. The beautiful girl was looking at me, comprehension dawning across her face.

"You're the one Jasper's been cut up about all day aren't you!" she gasped. I looked at Jasper. He bit his lip.

"Shut up Rosalie," he whispered. So this must be Rosalie, Jasper's twin sister. Rosalie looked between me and Jasper, laughed and ran upstairs.

"Alice got pushed by a mean girl!" Edward cried. Jasper looked at me.

"Was it Maria Ali?" Ali? Since when had he called me Ali? It was what Cynthia called me, and what my parents used to call me. I knew what it meant. It meant he cared. I shook my head. "Who was it?" I shrugged, but Esme glared at me.

"It was Lauren Mallory. I know her mother." She growled. Jasper looked at me, understanding clouding his perfect eyes. He walked over to me and stroked my hair.

"Why won't they just stop?" he whispered. I knew why they didn't. Because I was a freak. And if Jasper hung around with me, it would get worse. And then Jasper would be branded as a freak too. I had to get out of here. I rose from my seat quickly and I fled from the room.

**AN: Aww, so did you like Bella? I thought she was pretty sweet. I loved making her and Edward into four year olds! Thanks to all my reviewers again:**

**ALICECULLENSBESTFRIEND**

**tigerlili48**

**twilightoman**

**wednesdayshearts**

**keira**

**SweetoothMegs**

**SilverAngel1234**

**KerryKerry92**

**I would bake some cookies with Edward's face on them for you, but they would get squished in the post. Plus I don't know your addresses. And they'd go stale if you didn't live in England…**

hhhHH KKKKdhd


	4. Voice

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight. **

Voice

"Alice!" someone boomed over the babble of voices and I looked up. Emmett was by my side in an instant, smiling at me. "Want to go eat lunch?" he asked. I nodded. I'd met up with Emmett this morning and he already felt like a big brother to me.

I grabbed a sandwich and walked to my lunch table, Emmett following. He had just started to talk, when we were joined by two more people. Emmett's mouth hung open, gaping and Rosalie looked down, blush creeping across her face. Jasper stared at me. I put my head in my hands. "Who are they?" Emmett whispered in my ear.

"I'm Jasper, this is my twin sister Rosalie," Jasper said gesturing to the left of him. He didn't break his gaze. I pushed my chair back and almost ran out of the cafeteria, Jasper close on my heels. As soon as we were through the doors, I span around.  
"Leave me alone!" I moaned urgently. Jasper stared, his mouth falling open.  
"Alice, Alice. You spoke." He whispered. Shock spread through me as I realised I had. I had spoken. "Do it again." I tried, but no sound came out. There was nothing. I shrugged. "Alice," he whispered. "Why can't you understand that I can't leave you alone? Alice… I think I love you. I know I've only known you for a few days, but I can't live without you." I stepped forwards and I kissed him. And his lips were on my lips and my hands tangled in his hair. Electricity jolted through me like I was being shocked over and over. But in a good way. His long fingers stroked my face, his head burying into my neck, where he kissed me again and again. I gasped. My hands ran over his body, trying to take it all in.

"Get a room!" somebody laughed. We both jumped away from each other, shocked. Emmett was standing at the door, an amused look on his face. Rosalie was next to him, a smile slowly crossing her lips.

Wanna skip class? Jasper mouthed. I nodded. I waved at Emmett and Rosalie-Emmett laughed- and walked out the building with Jasper, my hand held firmly in his.

"Let me take you somewhere," Jasper whispered in my ear. I obeyed. "Close your eyes," he whispered, and I did. He pulled my hand forwards and I tried very carefully not to stumble. Jasper put his arm around my waist, keeping me stable so my feet could touch the ground easily. We walked for about ten minutes and then stopped.

"Open your eyes," whispered Jasper in my ear, and I did. I gasped. We were standing in the middle of a large field. There were three horses in it, one snow white, a bronze Shetland and the last a beautiful palomino. Jasper whistled and the palomino trotted towards him. It stopped right in front of him and Jasper stepped forwards to run his hand down the horse's nose. "This is Peter," he whispered to me. "This is my horse," I stepped forwards, cautiously and carefully reached my hand out to stroke Peter's mane. He snorted and I jumped about a foot backwards. Jasper laughed, and grabbed my hand. He led me over to the horse and put my hand on Peter's side. He didn't move a muscle. I stroked him, gently and he was silent. I smiled.

"Want to ride him?" Jasper asked. I stared at him in shock. "It's okay, I'll ride with you." He gave me a leg up onto Peter's bare back. I sat very still, not wanting to set the horse off. Jasper slid behind me. "Hold on to his mane, but not too tight," he whispered into my ear. I did as I was told, terrified. Jasper snaked his arms around my waist and I felt his leg move as he kicked the horse into action. I shrieked and Jasper laughed. I looked down and realised Peter was only walking. I hid my face, embarrassed, but Jasper kissed my hair. "I won't let you get hurt." He whispered. He kicked Peter again, and the pace picked up into a canter. I shrieked and held on tight, leaning forwards and burying my face in Peter's yellow mane. Jasper rubbed my waist. I slowly opened my eyes and leaned into him.

The green field rushed around us, although not too fast that I couldn't see the beauty of it. Not so fast that I couldn't see the daisies and wildflowers nestled in the grass. I watched the cloud shapes change as we circled around the field, Jasper always behind me. Eventually, he stopped Peter, and we slid off simultaneously. The other two horses trotted over.

I looked at Jasper quizzically, and he knew what I meant. "The white one is Rosalie's, her name is Vera. The bronze Shetland is Edward's. He's called Seth." I leant into Jasper's shoulder.

"I love you," I whispered.

"Nice to see you've finally spoken up," he laughed, and he kissed my hair again, making a line of pecks down to my lips. "I love you too Alice Brandon," he whispered, before kissing my lips passionately. "You're my life."

We stood arm in arm for hours. We didn't need to speak; being with each other was enough. I had spoken enough for one day anyway. It was more than I had spoken in the last six years.

We walked home together, hand in hand, still silent.

"Hello Alice! Hello Mr man!" someone called. Bella ran down the road towards us. "Alice, Emmett says you have a boyfriend!" she yelled. "Is this him?"  
"Yep, that's me," Jasper laughed.

"You better be nice," Bella growled. "Or I'll hurt you," Jasper laughed. He picked Bella up and whirled her around in the air. She squealed in excitement. When he set her down, she looked at him, staring at his face.  
"What's your name?" she asked him.

"Jasper," he replied.  
"I'm Bella, I'm four!" she exclaimed and ran forwards to hug me. "Hi Alice. Today was boring. Emmett wasn't at home." She pouted. "Then he came home and he told me _all_ about school. He said he liked Rosalie. Oh. Oh. I wasn't meant to tell you that. Don't tell him!" Her cheeks turned bright red. Jasper laughed.

"We won't. But I'll have to keep an eye on him if he likes my sister," he chuckled.

"Rosalie is your sister?" Bella asked. Jasper nodded. "Cool. You'll be my brother when they get married!" Jasper laughed. "Does that mean if you and Alice get married, I'll be Alice's sister?"  
"I guess?" Jasper shrugged.

"You can be my sister now if you want to be," I whispered. I couldn't manage anything above that. Bella gaped.  
"You spoke!" she exclaimed. She turned to Jasper. "You made her speak! No one can make her speak!" I smiled.

"Where's your Daddy Bells?" I croaked. She frowned. I rolled my eyes. Running off again. I held her hand and took a left with Jasper to get to Bella's house instead of going straight home. Bella chatted the whole way, although I chose not to answer this time. I still wasn't ready for whole conversations. She had taken to Jasper immediately, and I was so pleased. We passed by Jasper's house on the way to Bella's, and Edward came running out.  
"Jasper!" he yelled. "Mommy and Daddy have been wondering where you were. You skipped school! That's naughty!" he stopped when he saw Bella. He stared at her for a second and then ran back into the house. Bella looked shocked at his reaction, her tiny mouth puckered into a pout. Jasper waggled his eyebrows at me and I had to try hard not to giggle. Edward had a little crush on Bella!

Bella didn't say a word on the way home, her lips stayed pushed together, and tears were welling up in her eyes. When we stopped outside her house she whispered in my ear:

"Why does Jasper's brother hate me?" I shrugged as if I didn't know and she ran towards the door. Her father thanked us for bringing her home and we carried on to my house.

_Come and have dinner? _I wrote. Jasper nodded. He followed me inside and I ran into the kitchen, scribbling on the paper as I went. _Can Jasper stay for dinner? _I showed my mom. She looked at me and said: "Who's Jasper?"

Jasper thankfully chose that moment to walk through the door.

"That would be me ma'am. I'm Jasper Whitlock." My mom looked surprised at his politeness and nodded at me, raising her eyebrows. It was the most expression she had given me for years. I smiled.

Cynthia ran in and hugged me, gazing shyly at Jasper. "Hey," Jasper said gently. "You must be Cynthia. I'm Jasper."

"Hello," whispered Cynthia, sticking her thumb in her mouth. My mother looked at her, concerned. I rolled my eyes. Cynthia wasn't going to turn out like me. She didn't have the incentive to. She was just shy. She could be perfectly talkative when she was with me. My Dad walked into the room, his eyes narrowing. He stared at Jasper, his lip curling. Jasper's gaze didn't falter- I was impressed. I didn't know why my Dad was being so strict when it came to boys all of a sudden; he'd been wanting me to make friends for years. I guess he still had the over-protective dad in him. That was a surprise.

"Jasper's staying for dinner Greg!" my mom sang. "Isn't that great?" My dad just glared at her and sunk into a chair. I had to hold back my giggles. Jasper was starting to look very uncomfortable.

"I'm cooking macaroni and cheese Jasper, is that okay?" blustered my mom. He nodded enthusiastically. I gestured to a chair and he sat down, I sat next to him. He grabbed hold of my hand under the table and squeezed it. I squeezed back. He began to draw shapes on my palm, stroking it tenderly. Cynthia chose that moment to run over to me and clamber on to my lap. I let Jasper's hand fall, and wrapped her in my arms. My mom looked over, concerned, but didn't do anything, just carried on cooking the macaroni.

"You're big," whispered Cythia to Jasper.

"Well now, I guess I am," whispered Jasper back. "But you're a very lil lady aren't ya?" I almost giggled, noticing his southern drawl was slipping into his voice under the pressure.

"You speak weird," she breathed, then she slid off my lap and I was free to hold his hand again.

My mom set down two steaming bowls of pasta in front of us and that was when the questioning started.

"So, where do you live Jasper?"  
"Manor Road, ma'am,"

"Wow, Manor Road, that's impressive. What do your parents do?"  
"My Dad, Carlisle is a doctor and my mom, Esme is an interior decorator."  
"Oh, that's so nice. Do you have any brothers or sisters?"  
"Yes, a twin sister, Rosalie and a younger brother, Edward."

Then she dropped the bombshell.

"So, how long have you two been going out?" My mouth fell open. How could she be so forward. Yes Jasper was my… boyfriend wasn't really the right word, but we hadn't even told her.

"Err…" Jasper looked at me. I rolled my eyes.

_Jasper came to our school last Thursday mom. _I wrote. _We met then. _She seemed to notice me dodging the question, but she let it drop.

"So, where did you go to school before Jasper?"

"Camden Military School in South Carolina. Before that, my family and myself lived in Texas, but they moved to South Carolina with me to be closer."

"Military School huh?" My dad cut in. "Troublemaker?"  
"Well sir, I was a difficult child. My father saw it best to send me there. He was right. I learned discipline and respect." My Dad raised his eyebrows.

Jasper and I finished the macaroni, and I scribbled a note down on my card.

_Can we go out for a bit?_

"Sure honey!" My mom said, all bright and bubbly. She hadn't treated me this way for years, not like I was a real person. I sighed, and Jasper followed me out of the front door.

"Sorry," I whispered throatily.

"It's okay. Want to come back to mine, or have you had enough of families for one night?"

The shocked look on my face gave him the answer. "Okay, fine. But you have to meet them sometime. And you've already met most of them,"  
"Your-Dad. And-Rosalie-I-haven't-spoke-to," It was getting harder to speak. But Jasper understood. He put his arm around my shoulder.  
"Carlisle's great, he's really calm and easy to be with. And Rose… well, I admit she's high maintenance, but she can be nice when she wants to be. If it makes you feel better, when you come over, we'll invite Emmett and Bella as well. And Cynthia?"  
I sighed. There would be no way Mom would let me take Cynthia out. But I liked the idea of Bella and Emmett being there. I wrote this in my book. Jasper nodded understandingly. "Where do you want to go?" he asked.

"Peter," I said quickly. Jasper laughed.

"We've already seen him once! But we can again if you want." I nodded vigorously, and he took my hand, and started running. He was fast, but I could keep up. My short hair blew out behind me. I was blissfully happy. Jasper was all I needed.

**AN**

**Haha I made Peter, Vera and Seth into horses ******** I hope I didn't do anything wrong on the horse riding bit, the most I've ever done on a horse is walking and that was with a leader. Riding lessons were a bit out of the question for me because my brother's allergic to horses and can't even go near anyone who has horse hair on them. But my aunt has horses and I used to go out on them sometimes, but I couldn't ride on my own! Wrote most of this babysitting and watching TV at the same time, so I may have made a few mistakes, feel free to point them out! Haha, I looked up military schools, to find one for Jasper (yes Camden Military School is real) and I found Carlisle Military School. I really wanted to make it that one, but that would sound stupid, what with Carlisle being his Dad. Also, I didn't know what age the Carlisle Military School kids were, so I wasn't sure if it would fit around Jasper. You people who review are the bestest!!**

**RhianneMidNightSun**

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**Alice**

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	5. Family

Family

Jasper and I walked down the hall, hand in hand. Maria cast us an angry look as we went. I should have known she wouldn't have been able to do anything.

"Do I look okay?" I whispered as we walked outside. The only people that knew I had started speaking a little were Jasper, Emmett and Bella. And Emmett only knew because Bella told him. I didn't want the whole school to know, that would just give me unwanted attention.

"You look beautiful," Jasper breathed. I looked down. I was wearing a black dress, with straps that crossed over at the back and a tutu-like skirt that flared out, and made my legs look a little longer than their normal short state. I wore skin coloured tights and a pair of red shoes that had a soft, curved toe and very high heels. I had changed into the clothes at the end of the day, not wanting to look stupid all day.

"Not too dressy?" I managed to choke out. The nervousness wasn't helping the lack of speech. Jasper shook his head.

"No, you're perfect Alice,"

"I love you," I croaked.

"I love you too."

We walked along the roads, me staying silent, him chatting and joking to me. I had laughed more in the past few weeks than I had in my life. I was so happy, I thought I would burst. Now it was time to meet Jasper's family.

We stopped outside his house and I took a deep breath. "It's okay," Jasper whispered. "They'll love you,"

I suddenly felt more than confident, and together we ascended the stone steps leading to the front door. It flew open with a bang.

"Hello Alice!" Edward shouted excitedly. "Nice to meet you. Again."

"Edward, what did mommy say about opening the door?" Jasper chided.

"That I wasn't allowed because it could be a stranger, and stranger is danger." Edward recited. "But I knew it was you. I _saw _you!"

"I guess," Jasper laughed. I giggled.

"Come inside!" said Edward excitably. Jasper grinned at me.

"Hi Alice!" Esme's voice came from the kitchen, and she drifted into the hallway, her white dress floating around her. She pulled me into a hug. She smelt like cookies and baking bread.

She led me into the living room, where Rosalie and a man I presumed to be Carlisle sat. Rosalie gave me a small wave, but Carlisle got up and hugged me. I was surprised. I wasn't used to this kind of treatment from adults.

"Hi Alice, I'm Carlisle," he said calmly. "I think you've already met Rose?" I nodded shyly. I looked around the room. The furnishings were neutral, plain but sophisticated. My eyes latched onto the huge grand piano, standing in the corner of the room. It was beautiful, made with a dark wood and I just couldn't look away from it.

"Do you play?" Esme asked me.

_A little, I gave up lessons when I was ten. _I wrote in my notebook. _But I know the basics_.

"What does it say mommy?" Edward whined. Esme repeated my message softly in his ear. He nodded. "I'm on grade six already!" he said proudly. "I went straight to grade four because I already knew how to play before lessons. Auntie Carmen taught me."

"Don't boast Edward," Esme chided. Edward blushed a little.

_Play for me_ I scribbled. Edward looked at Esme and she repeated my words. His little face lit up.

"Sure!" he exclaimed, and he ran over to sit at the piano. His tiny fingers wove their way up and down the notes so fast I wondered how he could even reach. The notes flowed together, the melody beautiful and pure. I fell back on the leather sofa in shock. Jasper sat next to me and entwined his fingers in mine. When Edward finished, he grinned.

"That was Mommy's favourite," he declared and went and sat next to Jasper. He saw us holding hands and started to giggle. "Jazzy and Alice sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" he sang.  
"Out! Now Edward!" Esme scolded and Edward ran out of the room, laughing, his mother following him. I heard her shouting at him, but the words were muffled and it was too fast for me to make out what she was saying. Edward came back into the room, hanging his head.

"Sorry Alice. Sorry Jazz," he apologized. He looked up at Esme, who was standing in the doorway. She rolled her eyes at me, but it looked like she was trying to hold back a smile.

"Dinner will be ready in half an hour Jasper," she said.

"Come up to my room," he whispered in my ear. I nodded. Jasper's family were nice, but I didn't know if I could take much more of Edward's teasing.

I followed him up the stairs and we walked along a long hallway, until we came to the last door. Jasper pulled it open and stood back to let me in. I gasped as soon as I got inside. The room was huge, a big double bed sat in the corner, a laptop on a beautiful antique writing desk was pushed up against a wall and books lined every spare part of wall. A sound system, a stack of CDS and a closet took up the rest of the space in the room.

I walked around it, gazing at book titles, recognizing some of them. One bookcase was filled with books on the Civil War. I touched each spine, running my fingers along them. These were obviously his favourite; they looked like they were treated very carefully.

I turned around, and almost jumped straight out of my skin. Jasper was standing right behind me. He chortled a little, and then took my hand, pulling me closer to him.

His lips met mine and I felt the familiar jolt of electricity that always raged through me when I kissed him. I buried my hands in the soft cotton of his shirt, it was silky and gentle beneath my palms. He nibbled on my lip and I gave a little moan. He lifted me a little of the floor, and I giggled. He span me around, like I was six. I shrieked and he laughed and put me down, kissing me again.

Someone tapped on the door and we jumped about two feet apart. Rosalie put her head around the door, her blonde curls falling over her shoulders.

"Mom says dinner's ready," She said, looking between us and smiling. She backed out of the room.

"Let's go," he whispered, catching my hand so we could walk down together.

Esme set a plate of spaghetti bolognaise in front of me. I grinned. Spaghetti was my favourite.

We all dug in and Esme looked at me nervously.

"It's okay isn't it?" she looked worried.

"I-It's perfect," I managed to stutter out. Esme looked shocked, as did Carlisle and Rosalie. Edward was only interested in his spaghetti, shovelling it into his mouth as fast as he could. He looked up.

"Whasht?" he mumbled through a mouthful of meat. Rosalie looked at him, her eyebrows raised.

"You…You spoke!" Esme exclaimed.

"She can talk a little bit Mom, but not much. She only just started last week," Jasper explained. Understanding dawned on Esme's face. A wide smile spread across her strawberry lips. Rosalie's beautiful blue eyes widened. Carlisle gave a startled laugh. I bit my lip, embarrassed, and returned to eating my spaghetti bolognaise.

Esme's cooking was the best I had ever tasted. After the spaghetti, we had a chocolate gateau. The chocolate soothed me, I'd always felt that it did.

By the end of the meal it was ten o'clock. I was feeling sleepy and full, but not as much as Edward. He had fallen asleep during all the talking- not that I contributed, I just listened- and was faintly snoring. Carlisle laughed and scooped him up into his arms. He woke up for a second, stretched his arms and yawned widely, then went back to sleep. Carlisle carried him up to bed.

I could feel my eyelids drooping, but I managed to stay awake as Esme gave me a lift home. I could barely walk up the path, so Jasper pulled me into his arms and carried me to the front door. I heard him murmuring to someone, then he tried to pas me over. But I wanted Jasper, I didn't want him to leave. I hung on to his shirt. I heard his beautiful chuckle in my ear, and then we were climbing. I felt his hands prise mine away from him and I moaned in protest. His soft lips touched my head, and I was asleep.

--------------------------

Something was tapping. Tap. Tap. Tap. I opened my eyes. The tapping was still there. What was that? My mobile lit up across the room, buzzing against my chest of drawers. I scooped it up quickly, the caller ID said it was Jasper. I answered it, pressing the phone hard to my ear.

"Open the bloody window," Jasper growled. I realised that the tapping was pebbles being thrown against my window. I ran over to it, and looked down. Jasper was standing beneath me, looking up.

"It doesn't open" I whispered into the phone. He swore.

"How am I meant to get in?" he asked.

"Wait, Cynthia sleeps like a log. Her window opens. I'll go into her room."  
I tiptoed into Cynthia's room, and carefully opened the window, waving to get Jasper's attention. He ran over to me, then quickly shimmied up the drainpipe. I stared, but as soon as he got in, I closed the window and we crept back into my room.

"How did you do that?" I whispered.

"Military School remember?"  
"Oh. What are you doing here?"  
"I wanted to see you," he breathed. "I can't spend too long without you, it hurts." I pulled him into my arms and laid my head against his chest. "You go to sleep," he whispered. "I'm not tired."  
"I can't sleep with you here!" I protested.

"Yes you can," he whispered, and he laid me down on the bed. He laid beside me, and started humming in my ear. It was the same tune Edward had played earlier. His voice was beautiful, and I soon felt myself drifting off. To what would hopefully, tonight, be a dreamless sleep.

**AN:**

**Hope you're liking it so far! **


	6. Nightmare

Nightmare

_He stared at me, stroking my face. _

"_You won't survive this Alice," he whispered in my ear. "I'll make sure of that,"_

"_Alice," he whispered again, but it was more like yelling. "Alice wake up,"  
_I jolted awake, sitting up straight in my bed. I was gasping for breath, drawing in long rattling lungfuls of it.

"Alice, shush it's okay," whispered someone from beside me. I shrieked and fell off the bed. "Alice be quiet. It's me! They'll hear you!" I looked up. Jasper's worried face was looming over me and I burst into tears. "Hey, hey, what's the matter?" he asked, pulling me up onto the bed and cradling me in his arms.

"Bad. Dream." I sobbed.

"Sure sounded like it." He whispered in my ear. "For someone who doesn't speak, you talk _a lot_ in your sleep. You were saying: 'Don't kill me, please. Please don't.' Ali are you okay?" I nodded. Crap. I didn't know I sleep-talked. "Alice, what's the matter?" he breathed. I shook my head and buried my face in his shirt. He was still wearing the cotton one from earlier and it felt good on my face. Oddly comforting. He smelt nice, but I didn't think it was cologne. It was a natural smell. "Alice, I have to go home," he whispered into my hair. It will be time for you to get up in an hour. I have to go and pretend that I've been in bed all night. I touched the dark circles under his eyes.

"Did you sleep at all?"  
"A little," he smiled. "Maybe half an hour," I threw a pillow at him.

"You need some sleep Jasper. You're going to be exhausted tomorrow!"  
"Today," he corrected. I rolled my eyes.

"Go home!" I laughed, giving him a gentle shove. He stuck his tongue out at me, and walked out the door to climb out of Cynthia's window again.

I looked at my watch. It was 5:30. I wasn't going to get back to sleep now, not after the dream, so I walked over to my straighteners and started to work on my hair. When it was poker straight, I rifled through my school bag and pulled out Wuthering Heights. I hated the thing. It was stupid, how could two people who love each other, hurt each other so much? But I had to read it for school; otherwise English would result in an F.

I read until my clock read 6:30, then stowed the book away in my bag. I shuffled down the stairs and poured some cereal in a bowl, slicing a banana on top.

I ate slowly, knowing that the time would be drawn out until I saw Jasper again.

I spent ages deciding what to wear, eventually picking out a Abercrombie and Fitch T-shirt and a pair of Levi jeans. It looked like it was going to rain, so I grabbed my umbrella and shoved it into my rucksack. I stepped out of the door, and someone huge bounded out in front of me.

"Hey Alice!" Emmett cried and I laughed, putting my finger to my head and circling it around, to indicate that he was crazy. I saw my mom peering out of the curtains. Great. Now she probably thinks I've got two problems.

"So how are you? Speaking much?" he asked.

"A little," I croaked, sticking my tongue out at him childishly. He did the same back. A tiny drop of water hit me on the head and I groaned, pulling my umbrella out of my bag. I put it up to shield my hair from the water that was falling faster and faster from the sky. Emmett grinned at me cockily. I looked at him, confused. He grabbed my umbrella and ran down the road, laughing like a maniac, screaming, "You can't catch me!"  
"Emmett, you idiot!" I yelled as the rain seeped into my hair and I ran after him, putting my bag over my head as a shield. "I hate you!" He only laughed louder, and carried on running. I was getting closer to him now-I was faster than him. He suddenly came to a stop and I ploughed into the back of him. I fell to the floor and cried out in pain as I grazed my leg. Emmett didn't look around. But a person ahead of him did.

"Alice!" he yelled, and he ran towards me, picking me off the ground. It was Jasper. I greeted him with a kiss, and he returned it. Then he hit Emmett around the head. But Emmett didn't do anything. I waved my hand in front of his face. Nothing.

"Emmett, what are you looking at?" I asked. He was silent. My eyes followed his gaze and I saw Rosalie up ahead. She had obviously been walking with Jasper. Her eyes were locked with Emmett's.

"She's an angel." He whispered. Jasper and I looked between him and Rosalie and burst out laughing. It was so funny. It wasn't like they hadn't met before. Jasper took hold of my hand and Emmett's arm, dragging him along. We stopped when we came to Rosalie and I had to hold in my giggles as she turned bright red. We walked along in silence, Rosalie's and Emmett's eyes didn't move from the floor.

"Edward wouldn't stop talking about Bella this morning," Jasper whispered in my ear and I giggled. They were so sweet together. I hoped he would actually start talking to her.

"I can't walk you home tonight Alice, I'm grounded for skipping school yesterday," he breathed. "You'll be okay right? Walk with Emmett." I rolled my eyes. I'd walked home on my own every day before Jasper came.

We settled down into German, and Jasper put his head on the desk. He was exhausted because of last night. I couldn't help staring at him, his long fair eyelashes that curled upwards, his beautiful blonde hair…

"Alice Brandon. How would you say: 'My stomach hurts'?" The teacher asked me. I sighed. I knew the answer. She was expecting me not to. But I wasn't going to say it. She couldn't make me. She eventually turned away.

Jasper lifted his head and grinned at me. I smiled. The teacher gave us textbooks and we were silent as we worked out of them. Jasper let out a huge snore. A small giggle erupted from my mouth and before I knew it, I was rolling around the floor in laughter. Jasper had woken up and was staring at me, an amused smile on his face.

"Alice Brandon!" the teacher scolded. "Get up! Detention, tonight. And Mr Whitlock, ensure that you get more sleep in future or you'll have the same." I groaned and lifted myself up onto my seat. Today was going to be a long day.

Detention was the same as always, silent and boring. By the time I left, the sun was setting in the sky, and I was starting to panic. I hated being in the dark on my own.

I had just turned around the corner when I saw Bella, her dark hair falling over her tiny face.

"Bella?" I asked. She looked up and I saw her tear streaked face. I ran over to her. "Bella, what happened?"  
"I…I came to find you, but I couldn't!" she wailed. "You didn't come. And I can't find my way home, and I saw Edward, and I asked him where Jasper was, but he ran away. And I didn't know what do to because I was lost. Daddy always says stay in the same place but I forgot and I walked along the road, trying to get home."

"Shhhhh, it's okay," I whispered, pulling her onto my lap and stroking her hair. "It's all right baby,"

"Can we go home?" she asked. I nodded, even though it would take me an extra ten minutes to get home, and it would be dark by then. We started to walk, Bella's tiny hand in mine. A figure slipped out in front of us.

"Hello Alice." He said. "I haven't seen you in a while." I whimpered and turned around, starting to run, dragging Bella along behind me. But he was faster.

"Go away," I croaked, and Bella looked up at me, fear in her eyes.

"But Alice, I've been looking everywhere for you." He crooned. I cringed at his voice. "You don't go out in the dark anymore do you? But tonight you are. And you brought a little friend for me to play with." He bent down and stroked Bella's face. I pulled her away from him. "What's your name sweetheart?" he asked.

"Daddy says never to talk to strangers," Bella whispered, putting her thumb in her mouth.

"But I'm not a stranger," he whispered. I'm Alice's friend. I've known her since I was ten. I'm James, what's your name?"

"Bella," she whispered cautiously. I squeezed her hand.

"Go away James," I whimpered, biting down hard on my lip.

"No Alice," he whispered, "I'm not letting you get away this time."  
He grabbed mine and Bella's arms and dragged us towards a black van. He pushed us into the back and tied our hands behind our backs. Bella started to cry.

"Remember last time?" he asked me. "Well this is going to be worse." I started to cry too, tears pouring down my face at the memories…

**AN: **

**Ahhh it's James!!! Next chapter you find out about why Alice stopped talking, her past stuff like that. And there's a new character! You'll never guess who! I'm sorry it's taking me longer to update, but I'm soooo busy at the moment!! I've had German Exchange, then D of E, then this week I'm doing work experience, Sunday I have a singing exam, and the Sunday after that I'm singing a solo, singing in a group, and doing an acting thing in a show. Which means tomorrow is my singing lesson, and this Wednesday and next Wednesday I'm doing rehearsals for this show. So I'm going to be exhausted and might not get around to updating!! It might be Thursday when I next update, maybe if you're lucky it will be sooner. This is one long AN! Thanks to all the people who reviewed chapter 5:**

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	7. Scary Room

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. **

**All the italicised bits are the past…**

Scary Room

"_I want to go home, please let me go home," I whispered. James laughed cruelly. _

"_No Alice. You're staying. And once I've had enough of you, I'm going to kill you."_

"_My Mom and Dad will call the police, they'll find you!" I croaked. _

"_They don't care Alice," he spat. "And the police won't check here. No one knows about this place. No one. We're too far away from anywhere."_

_He stared at me, stroking my face. _

"_You won't survive this Alice," he whispered in my ear. "I'll make sure of that,"_

"_Please!" I shrieked "Let me go! I want to go home. Home with Mommy and Daddy and baby Cynthia!" _

"_But they love baby more don't they?" he drawled. "It's okay Alice. They don't care what happens to you now. _

"_No! NO!" I screamed as he raised his fist in the air. Not again. Please not again. _

_Once he was finished I lay on the floor and sobbed. Did Mom and Dad love Cynthia more. They had told me that they'd always love me just a few days ago. The ropes cut into my wrists. Why was he doing this? He'd just found me walking down the road and taken me. _

"_Alice?" Kate whispered from across the room. She crawled across to me and I sobbed into her shoulder. "It's okay baby, it's okay." She breathed into my hair. "I'll get you out of here._

Tears were falling down my face at the memory of last time. I could feel Bella's body shaking next to me in the dark van. She was sobbing quietly, whispering for her Dad and Emmett. I wanted to comfort her, to hug her, but my hands were tied behind my back. James drove fast, and our bodies slammed into the sides of the van at regular intervals. Bella would cry out every time. I would stay silent. I wasn't going to alarm her any more than necessary.

"It's okay baby, it's okay. I'll get you out of here," I whispered in her ear. Just like Kate had done for me. I wasn't sure if I could keep my promise. I had gotten lucky last time. This was different. He would make sure I was more securely locked up, so there was no way of me getting out. But maybe if I couldn't get out, I could get Bella out.

A lump formed in my throat at the memory of Kate. I shook my head, trying not to remember. But I had to, this place made me remember…

"_Alice, quickly!" she shrieked, pushing me out of the tiny window. I managed to clamber out and I stood on the window ledge, pushing my arm through the gap to help her out. She smiled faintly. _

"_Alice sweetie, I won't fit." She whispered. "You've got to go on your own okay? Keep walking until you find a river and then follow it. You'll get to a town eventually okay?" Tears were pouring down my face. I shook my head. "Alice, I'm sixteen. There's no way I can fit through that window. Go find someone, go home. Don't worry about me, I'll find another way out." I nodded, my face wet, and she wiped the tears away through the small space. "Make sure you get the old Alice back," she breathed. "The chatty one who would stay up all night with me and talk about what we were going to do when we got out. Get her back Ali. You can't stay silent forever. I love you, so much; you've been like my sister these past months. Get out, before he kills you." She kissed my cheek. "I'll always remember you Alice Brandon." I climbed down from the window sill, still crying. The last I saw of Kate was her hand waving out of the window. Then there was a scream, and the hand vanished. _

The van jolted to a stop, sending me and Bella flying forwards. Bella whimpered. The doors were open and light was shed upon us, but it wasn't a good, safe, warm light. It meant we were leaving the safe place, the place where James couldn't hurt us. We were going to that house. James grabbed both of our arms and dragged us through the forest. Bella was silent in fear, and when I looked at her, I saw she was mouthing the same thing over and over. _EdwardEdwardEdwardEdwardEdward. _A tear slipped from my eye. She had so much to lose. And Edward might never see her again. He loved her as soon as he saw her; he never even got a chance to talk to her. Bella obviously loved him too. And love made me think of Jasper. I fell to the ground, my head in my hands.

"Get up!" James snarled. I did as I was told. I knew that was better when James was concerned.

The grey house came into view and I squeaked in fear. I could see the bathroom window Kate had managed to slip me through. I was small now, but there was no way I could fit through that window any more.

We were dragged through the door and pushed into that same room, the one that featured in my nightmares every night. Except this time, an awful smell featured, making my nostrils burn.

"You're not getting out this time," he snapped. "You won't leave this room." And he slammed the door shut, engulfing us in darkness again. Bella burst into tears, long drawn out cries that broke my heart. I shuffled over to her and she managed to climb into my lap, crying against my chest.  
"Bella, baby don't cry."

"Hello?" someone asked from the corner.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"_Hello?" the voice was like heaven to me in this dark, lonely room. _

"_Who is it?" I asked, hoping it was someone nice. _

"Kate, Kate Denali," the voice said anxiously. I shrieked in delight.

"Kate? Kate is it you? Oh, I thought you were dead! Katie!"

"Alice?" she asked, astonished. "Oh Ali, he got you again. No!"

I ran-as best as I could with all of the ropes-over to her and I collided with her body.

"Ali!" she exclaimed. "It really is you!" she stroked my hair. "You're so grown up!"

"Alice?" Bella's tiny voice rang through the room. "Where are you?"

"Here baby!" I called, crawling back over to her. She sighed when she felt me next to her again.

"Who's that?" Kate asked.

"I'm Bella," she whispered. "I'm four."  
"Four?" Kate asked me, appalled. I burst into tears.

"I'm sorry Bells, I should have taken you straight home," I sobbed. "I shouldn't have sat with you for that long. It's so dangerous!"

"Who's the girl?" Bella asked me.

"This is Kate," I told her. "She was put in the van just before me last time I was here. We came here together. She helped me out."  
"Can you get me out?" Bella sobbed.

"Sorry sweetheart, no." Kate whispered. "He won't let us out of this room anymore. He installed a toilet in the corner. He gives us our food in here. That's the reason it smells so bad. The toilet flush doesn't really work. It's horrible.

I rested my head on Kate's shoulder. She had spent the last six years in this place. On her own. But this time, if I got out, I was taking her with me.

"He didn't kill you?" I whispered to her.

"No. But he still hits me, a lot. He never threatened to kill me though. Not like with you. He hated you…so much." I let out a little sob.

"How old are you Kate?" Bella asked.

"Twenty-two," she said sadly. She changed the subject quickly. "So you got your voice back Ali?"

"Jasper got it back!" Bella said excitedly, seeming to forget her surroundings. I was glad she could forget them, even if it was just for a second. Jasper's name made me burst into fresh tears.

"Shush, it's okay," Kate whispered. "Who's Jasper?" She said it kindly, but it just made me want him more.

"My…my boyfriend," I spluttered. I heard Kate sigh.

"Oh god," she moaned. "You've got even more to miss. I'm going to get you out of here again, both of you, if it's the last thing I do."

"You're coming with us," I snarled fiercely.

"I'll try," Kate murmured. "I want to see Tanya and Irina again. I miss them."  
"Who are they?" Bella asked, and I heard her put her thumb in her mouth and start sucking.

"My sisters, they're the best."  
"What about your mommy and daddy?" Bella enquired.

"My mom, Sasha, died having a baby," Kate explained. "The baby died too, it's name was going to be Vasilii. My Dad left when my mom got pregnant with Vasilii. He said he'd had enough. We never saw him again. Tanya always looked after me and Irina."

"That's sad," Bella muttered, snuggling into my side. A few seconds later she started to talk, random words. She was sleeping. It had been so long since we had last slept, but unlike Bella, I wasn't tired. I couldn't be in this place.

"Emmett, you told me if I got in trouble, you'd save me," she murmured, the jumbled words becoming sentences now she was more deeply asleep. I leaned into Kate's side, the words were like torture. "Edward, why do you hate me? I thought you were pretty." My breathing became heavier, as did Kate's next to me. Bella's words were affecting us both. She needed to be home, not here. "Mommy, I don't mind that you live with Phil. You have fun. I like living with Dad. I see Emmy all the time now. But it's very green. I made new friends, Alice and Jasper. And Kate too. Edward is pretty, but he hates me. I like him."

Her whole life was spewing out to us in her sleep. After about five minutes she went back to jumbled words again, things like "van" and "scary room." Each one made me cry even more. Kate had started to cry as well. Were we ever going to get out of here?

**AN**

**Next chapter I'm doing a Jasper POV because I want everyone to know what's going on back in Biloxi. I'm so sorry I took so long to update, but I've been doing work experience, and as soon as I get back I've been doing various singing rehearsals, and yesterday I went on the computer but only to learn a song, because I had twenty minutes to learn it before my rehearsal. And I have been checking my emails in little spaces at work, but I haven't had time to reply to any reviews or anything. (I wasn't really meant to be on my emails). Thanks to all the people who reviewed chapter 6:**

**twilightoman**

**ALICECULLENSBESTFRIEND**

**twilightluver919**

**twilight2muchx3**

**ASHLEYYBLACKBERRYYY**

**tigerlili48**

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**SarahxEmmett**

**Okay, am I weird or does anyone else think that James is kind of fit???? **


	8. Tracking

Tracking

**Jasper POV**

I stared at my clock. 1:00. I couldn't sleep. I had sent Alice an email to tell me when she got home. I never got a reply. Was something wrong? No, I was being stupid. She probably just didn't check her email. I climbed out of bed and flicked the switch on my laptop. It purred into life and I waited impatiently for it to load up. When it finally did I clicked on my email. Nothing. I groaned. Alice was probably fine, asleep in her bed. But something inside me told me she wasn't. _Should I go to her house? _I thought. But then I didn't want to wake her up, she hadn't had much sleep last night. And if my parents found me not in my bed, they would be angry. And I didn't want to worry Mom again. I gave a low moan and pushed my head into my pillow. The doorbell rang. My head snapped up. Who was coming to our house at 1 am?

Esme and Carlisle walked out of their room the same time as I did, wrapped in dressing gowns. Esme looked at me, her eyes questioning. I shrugged my shoulders.

Carlisle walked calmly down the stairs and opened the door. He was talking to someone, his voice concerned.

"Jazz, get down here," he ordered. I did as I was told, my feet numb, as though I knew something bad was about to happen.

"Where's Alice?" spat Alice's mother. "Is she here? I know she is." I shook my head slowly, my breathing was quickening. "No, she has to be," she rushed. "No, where's Alice?" I started to shake, a moan escaped from my mouth.

"Alice," I croaked. "Alice."

"Oh God," her mother whimpered, falling to her knees. She started to sob. "This is what happened last time."

"Last time?" I choked out.

"She went missing, for months." She whispered. "We thought we'd lost her. Then she came back, and the Alice we knew had gone. The chatty little girl who loved to shop and was interested in clothes had disappeared. She wouldn't speak any more."

I drew in deep, shuddering breaths, trying to get my head around what was happening. I looked up and down the street, as if she would be there, laughing at us for being so stupid. But there was nothing there. Except…a huge dark figure was running towards us.

Emmett stopped outside the door, staring at our horrified faces.

"H…have you seen Bella? Is she here?" he gasped. We shook our heads slowly. Emmett groaned in frustration.

"Have you seen Alice?" I asked quickly. Like we had done, he shook his head. "Crap!" I yelled, and ran past everyone and down the road, retracing the route Alice would have taken home from school. About three minutes from the school, I saw a lump on the pavement. I ran towards it. It was Alice's bag. I scanned the ground around it, as though Alice would be there. A tiny pink button was next to it. A button that looked a lot like the ones on Bella's dress. I broke down, sinking to the floor and crying into my hands. "Alice!" I cried. She had to be here, hiding from me, about to jump out yelling "BOO!" But there was no Boo, no answer. Just an owl hooting in the distance. I sobbed for a long time, until someone crouched down next to me and out an arm around me.

"We'll find them son," my Dad said, his voice shaking.

"They're gone," I whispered, rocking backwards and forwards.

"Bella's gone?" asked Edward, who I just realised was standing next to Carlisle, shock crossing his face. I nodded numbly. He burst into tears, clutching hold of Carlisle's arm.

"But she's so pretty," he sobbed. "She can't go."

Edward's tears made me cry more, leaving dark patches on the pale concrete…

**Bella POV**

The room was scary. Scarier than when Emmett hid and then jumped out and made me jump. Scarier than the clowns at the circus. It was dark. Very dark. Alice cried all the time, most about Jasper. She missed him. I missed Edward and Emmy and Daddy. But Edward hated me, so it was okay, because he didn't miss me. I wanted my mommy. I wanted to give her a hug. I hadn't given her a hug for a long, long time. Kate was nice, she was always nice to me. She said we had been in the scary place for a day. She told me she would get me out. That made Ali cry more. I hadn't seen the nasty man since the black van. But I knew he would coming back…

**Alice POV**

I wanted Jasper. More than I ever had before. I could hear James walking around the house, turning the taps on sometimes, watching TV. Every footstep made me jump. We had been in the room for a day. It was boring, but my grief gave me something to do. I cried a lot. Then the footsteps started coming towards the door. We huddled together, Kate whimpered.

James opened the door and slouched against the frame, a smirk on his face.

"It's dinnertime," he drawled. "But you can't just get the food. You know that right?"

"No," Bella whimpered. I nudged her.

"Well I could show you ickle baby Bella," he sneered. "I just need to let my anger out a little. Do you want to help me feel better?"  
"No!" I shrieked. "No, not her! Don't!"

"How about you Alice?" he chuckled.

"If it stops you from touching her," I growled.  
"But I want Bella, Alice," he leered. "I need to see how much she can hold out for,"

"Don't you dare," I snarled. Kate stood up next to me, glaring at James.

"She's four!" she yelled. "You're disgusting,"

He laughed cruelly. And walked towards us. He pushed me backwards easily, I fell to the ground with a thump. But Kate stayed standing, refusing to let herself fall. She kicked him hard in the shin and he stepped backwards, clutching his leg.

"Fine," he shouted, and he grabbed Kate by the hair, dragging her into the corner. "But next time I'll be more picky." Kate shrieked and I pulled Bella over to the other corner, covering her eyes and burying my head into my hair. Kate was silent, and I knew that she didn't want to scare Bella. But I could hear him hitting her, and every thump hurt me as well. When it was finished, he left the room for a few minutes, came back and threw some bread at us. One slice each. I stared at it in dismay. I was so hungry. Bella ate hers quickly, and then slumped back in the corner. I savoured mine, slowly biting into the stale crusts. Kate was still crying as she ate hers. Tears poured down my face as well. I felt sick. I needed to get Bella out of here, and fast. Kate too. They didn't deserve this any longer.

**Jasper's POV**

The police weren't helping. They thought they were, but they weren't. I didn't know how long it had been since I last slept, and I didn't care. I wanted to find her.

I went back to the place where I had found Alice's bag and I looked around. Apart from the black skid marks on the road, there was nothing.

"It was big," someone said behind me. I span around. Rosalie stood about five metres away from me, staring at the skid marks on the ground. "Probably a van. Something that Bella and Alice couldn't be seen in,"

"How do you know?" I asked.

"I'm a mechanic remember?" she told me. Normally she would have laughed, but she said it glumly. "It was going quite fast, there's a good chance there will be marks further down the road." She set off down the long street, and I followed her, hoping there would be something. "There!" she cried, pointing to the ground. Sure enough, there was another pair of black marks, indicating that the person had turned right. We walked down that street for ten minutes, but we came to a cross road, with no marks telling us where to go. There was no way we could find her.

"Jasper look," Rosalie whispered, pointing up to the traffic lights above us. A small camera was staring at us, tracking our every move. "CCTV," she breathed. She grabbed my hand and we ran to the police station. There had to be something on that tape that could help us find them.

**AN:**

**That was shorter than the other ones… Tell me what you think!!!! Mmmm just ate some smarties!!! The smarties people think that Billy Joel is called Billy Joe lol. Work experience is finished!!! Which means I have more time to update, although I have a lot of coursework to do this weekend, but I'll make sure I put at least one chapter up. Ahhh I have my singing exam on Sunday!! It's grade 5, I'm pretty freaked out! Wish me luck!! Thanks to all the people who reviewed chapter 7:**

**KerryKerry92**

**Skylar87**

**amypattinson'**

**TwilightEquestrian**

**your so mean (I only posted the names of the people who reviewed chapter 6. I looked again and there was no one I missed out)**

**lalelukind**

**SarahXEmmett**

**Kairaria Thermal**

**Chika-PyonPyon**

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**Move Over Alice Jasper's Mine **

**justanotherditzyredhead**

**Endless Raindrops**

**SweetAsPie**

**Elemental Serenity**

**ALICECULLENSBESTFRIEND**

**I was so pleased last night because I got about 8 reviews in the space of 5 minutes! 8 reviews!! We need to get it up to 100 people!! There's a police helicopter circling my house, so if I don't write again, I've probably been arrested. Although what for I don't know lol. No it's not really circling my house, just circling the village where I live!**


	9. Article

**Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine, it belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

Article

**Alice POV**

A car door slammed outside and I heard heels clacking along the path. That wasn't James. My heart soared in hope, had someone came to save us? But Kate seemed to realise what I thought, and she whispered in my ear:  
"That's Victoria, James' girlfriend. Her and Laurent and the only two that ever come here. She sometimes hits me too. I hate her. Laurent is okay, he's never hit me. He comes in here and talks to me when James goes out and leaves him in charge. He only puts up with what James does because he's his friend. He doesn't necessarily think it's right. But when Victoria comes… You have to be careful Ali,"

Bella snuggled into my side, she was asleep again. We'd managed to keep James from hitting her so far. He'd hit me once, my cheek still smarted from the blow.

I could hear high pitched girlish giggling from the other room, and then the door opened. I caught a glimpse of wild orange curls before the room was plunged into darkness again.

"Ooo, newbies," she giggled, but I could hear sadness underneath the laugh. Bella woke up with a tiny moan.

"Who there?" she asked, her voice thick with sleep. Victoria gave a little cackle.

"It's Victoria. You'll be seeing a lot of me." Bella was silent. She could recognize someone who would hurt her when it was this obvious.

"Why are you here Victoria?" Kate snarled. I nudged her. She was protecting me and Bella, but forgetting about herself.

"I wanted to see Alice and Bella," she replied sweetly. I heard her kneel down in front of me and she touched my face. She replaced the soft touched with a sharp slap. I yelped and Bella whimpered. "James says he's going to make sure he kills this one this time."  
"He can't," Kate whispered. Victoria laughed.

"He can. I'll make him kill you too, brat," she got up and I heard a thump when her foot connected with Kate's body.

"Leave us alone!" Kate cried. "Why are we even here? All you do is hurt us. You don't hold us for ransom; you don't get anything from this! Why are we here?"

"Revenge," Victoria hissed, and she left the room.

"Revenge for what?" I cried at the door, but there was no answer. "Revenge for what?" Kate leaned into my shoulder and Bella started to cry again. That set me off.

Jasper. That was all I wanted right now. My Jasper. I thought about all the times I had hurt him, pushed him away because I hadn't wanted to be hated anymore. But I didn't want him to be hated either. I thought of all the things we could have done, we could have got married, had children, lived until we were old and the last thing we would say before we died would be "I love you." But now it seemed that I would die here, in this cold, smelly, dark room. Without Jasper, without his love.

My head snapped up. Had I lost all hope? Jasper would find me. I knew he would. I loved him and he loved me. That was enough.

**Jasper POV**

I was sitting in Alice's room. I wasn't meant to be here. I had climbed through Cynthia's room again. I just wanted to find something, anything that would lead me to where Alice was. The police had scanned through the CCTV evidence, and had seen a black van go past, but the number plate had been covered with a piece of cardboard. The guy had obviously known there was a CCTV camera there. He was clever. I sighed and shoved my hand under Alice's bed. My hand came into contact with old straighteners and hair curlers and then a scrunched up piece of paper. I pulled it into my fist and took it out, carefully smoothing it out so I could read it. It was a newspaper article.

_**ALICE BRANDON FOUND!**_

_**Alice Brandon (10) who has been missing for five months was found yesterday by Mr and Mrs Bradshaw. The couple were out walking in a forest near Clarksdale, Mississippi when they came across the girl, severely battered and bruised. "We were shocked," Janie Bradshaw told us. "She was in an awful condition. We had seen the posters and the news reports, but we didn't recognize her at first, she was so badly injured. She refused to speak or tell us her name, so we took her back to our house and called the police. While we were waiting for them she wrote her name on a piece of paper. We were completely astounded when we realised it was Alice Brandon." Alice was rushed to hospital, where her more serious injuries were treated and she was tested for sexual abuse. The test came up clear. Alice still refuses to speak, and has been transferred to the psychiatric ward at the Biloxi Regional Medical Centre. It was believed that Kate Denali, who went missing on the same day as Alice was also kidnapped by Alice's abductor, but Alice showed no response at Kate's name. **_

A picture was at the bottom of the article. A ten year old Alice, her black hair sticking up in all directions, was lying in a hospital bed. Her face was puffy and bruised, there were cuts all down her neck and up her arms. I gulped. I felt sick. This was why Alice didn't talk. This was why she was always so nervous. I felt hot angry moisture bubble up in my eyes and before I knew it, I was lying on the floor sobbing.

The light clicked on.

"Alice?" someone asked hopefully. I looked up, and standing over me was Alice's mother, looking heartbroken.

"I'm sorry," I sobbed. "I'm trespassing, I know. I just had to come. I'll go," but as I was walking out of the room, she caught my arm and pulled me towards her. She started to sob into my shoulder.

"It's okay," she cried. "I miss her too."

"What was she like?" I asked. "Before…" I couldn't finish my sentence, but she knew what I was talking about.

"She was amazing," she whispered. "I never knew a child could talk that much! She was a complete girly girl, she loved everything pink and I couldn't walk around a shop without her wanting something. She had amazing fashion sense and wouldn't walk around with me if I was wearing something "unfashionable". She was the complete opposite of what she is now. Which is why I find it hard to talk to her. I just think about what she was like, and how it was all ruined. She won't even tell me what happened, who it was, where she was. Every night she wakes up screaming, and I can't do anything about it. Whatever was there has killed her Jasper."

"I have to find her," I whispered.

"You won't be able to," she sobbed. "We tried and tried, for five months and we never found out where she was. We only know now that it was near Clarksdale. Even then, the couple who found her told us she was exhausted and looked like she'd been walking for days."

"I'm going to go." I growled. "She has to be there, somewhere, anywhere,"

"You can try," she smiled faintly. "Try," She left the room and I was on my own again, surrounded by the contents of Alice's room, drawers unturned and bookcases pulled out. I stared at Alice's schoolbag, it had been returned to the house once the police couldn't find any fingerprints on it. I opened it and pulled out her diary, the one I had gotten her email address from. I flicked through it, hoping there would be some clue to where she had gone. A page full of writing caught my eye and I stopped and smiled. Etched into the page in black biro over and over was Alice4Jasper and Mrs Alice Whitlock. I carried on through the pages, starting to feel guilty for looking at her diary. But on the very last page, thousands of rough spikes were drawn over the paper. And in between the spikes was the same name again and again. James. I gulped. Who was James? Was he the guy who had kidnapped her? I felt sick inside. I turned to the page before it, and one line was scrawled across the top. _I'm Sorry Kate. _I looked back at the newspaper article. _**Kate**_ _**Denali, who went missing on the same day as Alice. **_So this Kate had been with Alice. But she hadn't got out.

I ran down the stairs and through the front door, all the way back to my house. I thumped on the door. I waited a few minutes, and Carlisle opened it, looking alarmed.

"Jasper!" he scolded. "Why are you out? You're meant to be in bed!"

"I need to get to Clarksdale!" I practically screamed at him. "NOW!" Carlisle took one look at me and said:  
"Okay," I was relieved. I wasn't sure if he would take me or not. I guess he saw the panic in my face. Esme came running down the stairs, followed by Rosalie and Edward.

"Where are you going?" Edward asked sleepily.  
"To go find Alice and Bella," I told him.  
"Me coming," he said firmly.

"No sweetheart, you stay with me," Esme said quietly.

"ME COMING!" he shouted, and Rosalie looked at him, shocked.

"Okay Edward, you can come," sighed Carlisle. Esme looked at him, alarmed.  
"Carlisle, no!"

"He'll be fine, we'll bring his coat."

"No!"  
"I want to save Bella!" Edward growled. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"Just let him go Esme. We'll wait here for news." She told me.

Carlisle set off at top speed, but when we reached the top of the road, I saw a figure stooped over in the early morning light. I rolled down the window.

"Emmett!" I yelled. His head snapped up. "We're going to find Bella and Alice. You in?" He nodded vigorously and climbed into the seat next to Edward.

"I'll just call Charlie, before he worries," he said, calling Charlie and from the shouting down the phone, Charlie obviously wasn't pleased with Emmett's decision. That and the fact that Emmett had woken him up.

"I'm still in my pyjamas," Edward whined from the back seat. "What will Bella think?" And despite the miserable mood, Emmett and I burst into laughter. Now we just had to find them.

**AN:  
Wrote this in the dark, because my sister was asleep. OMG, over 100 reviews!!!! I am so pleased. I'm not going to write out everybody because I got 19 reviews and I really can't be bothered to write them all out. I didn't get arrested!!!! Thank you to SweetAsPie23 who told me she'd bail me out if I got arrested! Lol. Ahhh singing exam tomorrow!!!!**


	10. Tears

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…**

Tears

**Alice POV**

I could feel the winter coming, it blew around the room in cold gusts, making Bella shiver uncontrollably. She was only wearing a light dress; it had been surprisingly hot for the end of autumn when James had taken us. She had no jumper. I was scared she was going to get ill. The ropes had burnt my wrists, and they were so raw that I flinched every time I moved. Kate wasn't talking as much, she knew the winter was coming and it scared her. I had never been here in the winter, the cold spring days were awful, let alone the frost of the cold season.

The hope inside me that Jasper would come was slowly fading away. It had been a week. He had no idea where I was, he only knew that I was with Bella. Why didn't I just tell someone, anyone about this place, about Kate? I was stupid, a horrible person. I broke down into tears again. It was so unfair. Just after I found Jasper I had to be taken here again.

"It's okay," Kate breathed. "Shush don't cry Alice," I'd cried so much in the last week that I didn't know I could have any more tears. But I did, they just kept coming. Bella's sleep talking was getting worse, and every word was like a rusty knife being pushed into my stomach and twisted around. Especially when she mentioned Jasper. I hated it here. I hated the cold, the dark. But most of all, I hated James.

**Jasper POV**

Edward waddled along next to us, six blankets wrapped around him. Carlisle had taken extra precautions, because if Edward came home with so much as a hint of a cold, Esme would blow her top. Carlisle pushed Edward's buggy (Edward had yelled until Carlisle had unstrapped him) and I carried a torch. Emmett scanned the floor desperately as though looking for some clue to where his sister was.

"I'm too big for a buggy," Edward grumbled.

"But it's a long way Ed," I told him. "You can't walk that far," He glared at me.

"Can too. And don't call me Ed," I chuckled weakly, and shivered. It was getting cold. We had found a forest near Clarksdale, but we weren't sure whether it was the right one or not, we were walking around it- the trees were packed too densely for the Mercedes to plough through- and we still hadn't found a thing.

"When will we find Bella? I haven't seen her for a week!" Edward moaned. I looked at Edward sadly.

"I don't know Edward, I don't know," I murmured, and he looked at me, fear clouding his eyes. My fear was obviously making him scared too.

"But I want Bella," he whimpered, and he burst into tears. I scooped him up into my arms and wrapped the blankets around him.

"We'll try and find her," I whispered in his ear. "I'll make sure we find her,"

**Alice POV**

"Edward, why aren't you coming?" Bella murmured, turning over in her sleep. I heard a chuckle from the corner of the room and I flinched. I hadn't noticed James walk in.

"Wake her up," he growled.  
"No," I said firmly, but my voice broke.

"I want to talk to her," he drawled. "And if you don't wake her up, it will be worse,"

"Bella," I whispered, giving her a nudge. She sat up quickly.

"Edward?" she asked.

"No sweetie, it's Alice," I breathed.

"Aww does baby Bella think Edward's coming to get her?" James chuckled. Bella whimpered quietly. I felt James walk past me and I pressed harder into the wall. I didn't want to touch him. There was a loud slap and Bella screeched in pain.

"No!" I yelled, and I launched myself in front of where I thought she would be. My body collided with James' and I hit my head hard on the floor, blood started to pour from it. James laughed, and kicked me in the stomach so that I doubled over in pain.

Bella screamed again. I heard Kate shushing her. I felt something sharp draw a line along my arm and I screamed in pain, louder than I ever had before. Kate gasped.

"Alice, what's going on? What's he doing?" I didn't answer; I had to keep my jaw locked to keep another scream from coming. James laughed cruelly and left the room. As the chink of light from outside lay on us for a few seconds, all I saw was red. Red, everywhere. Once he was gone, Kate crawled over to me.

"Oh no, Alice no," she whimpered. Blood was seeping through my hair, and out of my arm. I heard a rip and Kate felt across my head. She tied some type of material around it, then carefully picked up my arm. There was another loud rip and a huge piece of material was wrapped around my arm. I felt myself slowly slipping away into another kind of darkness…

**Jasper POV**

We had been searching for a week. Carlisle had taken Edward back to Biloxi and then come straight back again to continue searching. This was the fifth forest I had tried.

"Jasper…" Carlisle said to me one evening. "I don't think we're going to find them,"  
"No!" I protested. "We will, we have to!"

"Jazz, there aren't any more forests in the area. We haven't found anything here. And I don't think we ever will."

"She got out last time!" I shouted. "She got out!"

"Jasper," Carlisle looked at me sympathetically. "Last time she managed to get out, but wouldn't her kidnapper have made sure she couldn't get out that way this time? And it took her five months. We're not even sure if she _is_ in the same place as last time. That was it. I felt the tears bubbling in my eyes and I leant into Carlisle's shoulder for support.

"It'll be okay son," he breathed. "You're just going to have to get over her,"  
"I can't!" I practically screamed in his face. "I love her Dad! More than anything in the world!"

"Sometimes we lose the things we love," he said quietly. "But it doesn't make us love them any less. I think you should do what you want with your life, graduate from school."

"I can't!" I choked out.

"I'll stand by your decision," he said gently. "But I think we should leave it to the police to find Alice and Bella,"

"No!"

"Jasper, I think we should," Emmett said slowly. "I don't think…I don't think we're going to find them. You said that Alice's mom couldn't find her last time."

"But, we could just search a little longer!" I said desperately. I wanted my Alice. More than I'd ever thought I'd ever wanted something. She was my oxygen now. I couldn't live without her. And the thought of her tiny frail body being somewhere cold and unfamiliar almost killed me. The only reason I was still sane was because I had to find her. I couldn't just leave her, all alone.

"We should go home Jazz," Emmett whispered. "Let the police do there job,"

"NO!" I shouted. "NO we can't! Don't you see! We can find them! We have to look harder!"  
"Jazz," Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder.

"Get off me!" I spat. "I'm going to find them. I know you don't care, but I do!"  
"She's my baby sister Jasper! Of course I care!" Emmett roared. "And Alice is my friend. The first friend I made when I came to Biloxi! So don't pretend you're the only one who's hurting!" He fell to his knees, sitting on a fallen log and put his face in his hands. Carlisle glared at me.

I groaned in frustration and span around, walking into the depth of the forest. "Jasper!" I heard Carlisle shout after me, but I carried on. I started to run, frantically searching, for something, anything. I tripped over a log and fell to the floor, tears pouring down my cheeks.

"Alice!" I screamed into the night. "Alice!" I brought my fingers up to my face and scraped them down it, leaving long cuts. I lay on the floor and cried, the dirt mingling with my blood.

Someone put their hand on my shoulder, but I didn't look up.

"Jasper?" Emmett asked. "Jasper please," I didn't answer. "Jasper?" He pulled me up into a fireman's lift. I didn't struggle and he ran through the forest. "Carlisle?" he said. "Carlisle I think something's wrong with him."

I felt myself being slid onto the passenger seat of the Mercedes. I closed my eyes and whispered her name over and over. "Alice, Alice, Alice, Alice."

"Jasper, I'm going to have to take you to hospital, get a tetanus jab, you got quite a lot of dirt in those cuts," he told me. "Are you okay?"

"Alice, Alice, Alice, Alice." I wanted her back.

**Alice POV**

"Alice! Wake up! Alice don't die! Please don't die. Alice I'm scared." I heard a little voice say.

"Bella?" I croaked. I didn't want to open my eyes. I wanted Jasper to be the first thing I saw.

"Alice woke up!" Bella cried.

"Thank god," said a female voice. Who was that, Esme? Then the reality hit me and I sat up straight.

"Jasper?" I asked, then burst into tears.

"Hey sweetheart, it's okay," whispered Kate, pulling me carefully into her. I cried onto her shoulder.

"I want my Jasper," I moaned.

"I know sweetie,"

"Did I stop bleeding?"

"I don't think so." Kate said slowly. "You've been unconscious for about ten minutes. But I think my t-shirt is helping."

"Thanks Kate," I whispered. "For everything."

That was when I heard it.

"Alice!" a voice shouted. "Alice!"

"Jasper!" I cried. "Jasper, oh Jasper!"

"Jasper?" Bella asked, and I could almost hear her smile.

I waited for twenty minutes in silence. There was still nothing.

"He's coming, he's coming for me," I eventually said.

"Alice, I don't think it's Jasper," Kate whispered.

"No, he's coming, it was Jasper. I know it was. Who else would have called my name? I know that voice anywhere."

I waited and waited. There was nothing. So in the end, I lay down on the floor crying, and gradually fell asleep.

**AN:  
I cried writing this chapter. Was that stupid? I was listening to this sad song when I was writing it, and I couldn't help but cry (Don't ask me what the song was, I was listening to my iPod on shuffle and I can't remember what one it was). I had my singing lesson this morning. God it was so scary. The first song I almost totally froze up, partly because it's my worst song and partly because I was so scared. Luckily I remembered to put some expression into it!! Second and third song were fine though, especially my third one because I love it!! Thanks to all the people who wished me luck xxx **


	11. 1 Year Later

**Dedicated to Soph, who to helped me make the decision whether to use this chapter, or write a happier one. Thanks for listening to my story Sophie-loo. She insisted that she would write notes on it, and that I should put them on here. This is what she wrote:**

**Intresting (And yes she spelt it like that)**

**Sad**

**Write More**

**Good**

**Adjectives**

**Argggggggggggghh**

**Brilliant**

**SAD (how many times can she use that word?)**

**Briliant**

**Scary **

**Fantastic**

**Bring To a Publisher. That was when I explained that I couldn't because it was a fanfiction. For those of you who don't know, Sophie is my little sister. She's nine. She was literally bouncing up and down when she saw how many reviews I got, and she told me she had to read it. So I just read it to her. Brace yourselves for this chapter people, the word Argggggggggggghh was in response to this one.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight. **

1 year later…

**Alice POV**

One year. I had counted the days and today was the one year mark. One year since Bells and I had been taken to this shitty place. Bella had turned five in September, I had turned seventeen back in April. Kate had turned twenty-three about a month after we had been taken here. We were all older, but I felt like I was still the immature sixteen year old I had been a year ago.

Jasper's face was imprinted on my brain, I was desperately holding on to it, and hoping that somehow, he wouldn't forget me either.

"It's been a year Kate," I whispered, my voice hoarse.

"Already?" she asked. I gave a little moan of frustration.

"Year since what?" Bella asked.

"Since we came here," I told her. There was a pause.

"I only remember a little bit," Bella told me. That was the sad thing. Bella was forgetting everything. She still talked about home in her sleep, but less often, and she never mentioned Edward to me when she was awake.

"How much do you remember Bells?" I asked quietly, lying back on the cold floor.

"Colours," Bella whispered. "Pretty colours. A Daddy and three boys. One was Emmett."

"And the other boys?" I asked fearfully.

"Pretty," she whispered sleepily.

"But Bella, what were they called?" I was getting desperate. She was silent for a few seconds, but she finally said:

"Edward and Jasper." I sighed in relief, flinching a little at Jasper's name. She started to snore quietly.

"If she's here for much longer Alice, then she'll forget," Kate whispered to me. "She'll forget everything. I don't want her to,"  
"Neither do I," I muttered sadly.

A car pulled up into the driveway outside and I could feel Kate stiffen beside me. I crossed my fingers, hoping that it wasn't Victoria. I had lost hope that someone would find us long ago. But there was no high heels clacking down the path, and I relaxed. It was just Laurent. We heard voices outside the room, then a car pulled out of the driveway again. James was leaving Laurent to watch us. The door creaked open.

"Kate, Alice, Bella! Get up. We're getting out of here."  
"What?" breathed Kate.

"I'm getting you out. Are you coming?"

"Bella, wake up!" I hissed.

She moaned and sat up. "We're leaving," I whispered, and in the little light that had temporarily flooded the room, I could see her smiling.

"Forever?" she asked.

"Hopefully,"

Laurent led us out of the door, and all of us gasped once the light hit out faces. Light spots blossomed in front of my eyes, and I blinked over and over to make them go away. Once they had gone, I looked at Kate and Bella. I gasped in horror. Kate's face was black and puffy, congealed blood in her long blonde hair. Bruises covered her arms, dark spots of hurt which I wished I could smooth away. But Bella was the one who shocked me most. She looked like Kate, but it was so much worse on a five year old. Her chocolate eyes didn't hold the same brightness they had when I met her, they looked dull and sad. Her pink dress was caked in mud and blood. I glanced down at my arm and traced my finger over the long scarred lines. The most recent ones had scabbed over, but earlier ones had turned into long puckered white lines. Both Kate and Bella's hair was greasy, clogging up the normally shiny locks. I bit my lip.

Laurent took us out to his car and we all piled into the back, not saying a word. I was so hoping that this could be our chance out. The windows were dark tinted, so if Victoria or James happened to drive past, they wouldn't see us.

The engine purred into life, and Kate squeaked in excitement. I would have squeezed her hand, but ropes still bound our wrists. I examined the deep cuts beneath them; whenever they had tried to heal the ropes had just cut in again.

The seats were comfy, and I felt myself falling asleep.

My eyes opened to the familiar sign: **WELCOME TO BILOXI**__and I squealed. Had I been asleep for that long? Bella's head was on my shoulder, and it snapped up at the noise. She looked around, confused.

"We'll be home soon Bells," I whispered in her ear. "We'll be home soon."

Laurent dropped us off in the centre of town.

"If you dare tell anyone about me," he growled. "Then I'll come and kill you myself," And he drove off at full speed. Kate and I looked at each other and screamed in excitement. People started to look and a man walked over.

"Jesus, what happened to you? I think we should take you to the police station."  
"No, I want to see Jasper!" I screamed.

"The police can take you to Jasper love," he said quietly, and he walked with us over to a huge building. The receptionist gasped when we walked in.

"Hello, I need someone here, fast. And call an ambulance while you're at it," she said into a phone receiver. "Constable Ryans is on his way." She told us. "Are you okay?"

"I'm more than okay!" I squealed happily. She looked at us, confused. I stared at the posters behind her. There were three faces I recognized. Under a sign saying MISSING, were pictures of a younger Kate, Bella and me. I gasped, walking slowly over to them.

"That's us," I said to the receptionist. She looked at me.

"Oh my god, you're Alice Brandon!" she shrieked.

"Alice Brandon?" the man asked. "The lass that went missing last year? Look its Isabella Swan too!"

"Bella," Bells growled. Kate laughed.

A policeman walked into the room.

"Woah," he exclaimed. "I just called an ambulance, there will be one here in a moment. What are your names?"  
"It's Alice Brandon and Bella Swan!" the receptionist squealed. The policeman looked shocked.

"And who are you?" he asked Kate.

"Kate Denali," Kate whispered.

"Bloody Hell," the policeman said. "Gemma, call Chief Swan and get him to come down here,"

Minutes later, Charlie walked into the room, confused. He looked between the three of us, then his eyes settled on Bella.

"Bells?" he asked. "Bells is that really you?" He ran over to her, picked her up and swung her around in the air. "Oh Bella, I missed you so much!" Tears were pouring down his face.

"Hello Daddy," Bella said shyly.  
"What the hell happened to you?" Charlie growled.

"The scary man!" Bella exclaimed.

"Charlie can you call Jasper?" I asked. He looked at me sadly.

"I'll call your parents," he told me.

"But I want Jasper!" I yelled.

I heard sirens outside, and the receptionist ushered us through the door. Charlie and Constable Ryans followed.

"Daniel, stay here and call Alice's and Kate's family. Tell to come to Biloxi hospital. I'll do all the questioning," he told Constable Ryans, as the paramedics rushed over to us, looking us over. We were bundled into the back of the ambulance and the ropes were carefully cut off our wrists. They made us lie back on the gurneys and I pulled a face at Kate. Our spirits were running so high, that she burst out laughing. I reached out to Bella and took her hand.

"We aren't going back are we Ali?" Bella asked me.

"No," I whispered to her, and she smiled. We were raced to hospital, and we were put altogether, in one room. Doctor's rushed around us, taking blood tests, giving us shots. Then as one more doctor walked into the room I screamed.

"CARLISLE!"

"Alice?" he asked, shock crossing his face. He looked next to me. "Bella? Oh thank god, thank god!"

"Where's Jasper?" I asked quickly. Carlisle looked down.

"I'll explain later," he whispered.

"Where is Jazz?" I screamed. Carlisle looked at me sympathetically, running his fingers over my head. He winced at the extent of my injuries.

"Katie?" someone shouted. "Kate?"

Two very pretty girls ran into the room. The oldest had strawberry blonde hair, and was crying. The one who looked younger had short white blonde hair, she was grinning from ear to ear. This must be Tanya and Irina.

"Erm, you're not really meant to be here," one doctor said.

"Shut up!" hissed Irina, bending down to hug Kate. "Oh Katie we missed you so much! We thought…"

"I love you!" said Kate. "I love you both so much! You're the best sisters ever!"

"Alice?" a high pitched voice squealed. I sat up.

"Cynthia?" I called. Someone screamed, and Cynthia ran up to me.

"I missed yooou!" She screeched. I drew her into my arms and hugged her tightly.

"I missed you too," I whispered. Then there was a flash of dark hair, and my parents were behind me, both hugging me to them at the same time, which was kind of awkward, seeing as I was on a bed.

"We missed you Alice," they whispered.

"I missed you too," I breathed. They drew back and looked at me shocked.

"You…you can talk!" my mom almost screamed.

"I could talk before I got taken," I put my head down. "Jasper helped me."  
"You didn't tell us? _He _didn't tell us?" my mom whispered, but she shook her head and hugged me again. "I love you so much my Ali,"

I buried my head into her shirt and breathed in her smell. Cookies and roses, like always. I smiled.

"I drove over here as soon as Dad called me!" Emmett bellowed, walking into the room. "I missed my two favourite girls!" I hopped off the bed and both Bella and I ran to Emmett at the same time. He swallowed us in one of his bear hugs.

"Ouch!" Bella complained. Emmett chuckled.

"Jeez, you two look terrible!" he said, looking us over.

"Duh, we've just been kidnapped!" I said to him. He looked at me sadly.

"I was hoping that was it Ali," he said slowly. "I was hoping you wouldn't have been hurt." I sighed and hugged him again.

"Emmett, where's Jasper?" I asked.  
"No one's told you?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Alice, Jasper isn't in Biloxi any more. He…He joined the army. Alice, he's gone to fight in Afghanistan." I could feel my breathing quicken and I swayed. Emmett held my arm and I could feel the Doctors trying to press me back into bed.

"What?" I screamed. Then I blacked out.

**AN:**

**Nooo I can't believe I wrote it!! I'm so sorry! Sophie was the one who made the decision for me to keep this, so if you hate it, I'm sorry. Actually at first she told me to delete it because it was sad, but then said it was really good at the same time. So I decided to post it. Don't hate me!!!!**


	12. Promise

**Disclaimer: No, Jasper isn't mine. I wish he was :( Nor do I own twilight. **

Promise

"Alice?" someone called calmly. "Alice can you hear me?" I groaned in response. I knew there was reason why I was lying comfortably, but I couldn't quite bring it to mind. The pain wasn't fresh, like it normally was. It hurt, but not as bad as it normally did. "Alice?" The calm voice said again. I frowned. That wasn't James, or Laurent. Yet it was definitely male. My eyes fluttered open. Carlisle's face loomed over me, and the last twenty-four hours rushed back to me. Jasper. Jasper had gone to war. He hadn't waited for me.

"Jasper," I moaned sadly.

"I'm sorry," Carlisle bit his lip. I sat up. I had been put into another room, there was no one else here. "No, lie down Alice, you have to stay lying down," There was a huge lump in my throat and I felt as though my heart had been ripped out. And he was telling me to lie down?

"I want Jasper," I growled.

"Jasper can't be here Alice," Carlisle said softly. "You know that. He gets a break in a month. Alice, you have to promise me one thing."

"What?" I groaned.

"Promise you won't contact him before he comes to visit. He'll come back, go AWOL. And as much as it hurts me to see Jasper go to war, I couldn't cope with him being in prison," I swallowed.

"I can't write a letter or anything?" I asked.

"I can't stop you," Carlisle whispered. "But it would be best," I closed my eyes, knowing he was telling the truth. But no contact with Jasper, when I was here, able to contact him, it was awful. But did Jasper even want contact with me? He had probably moved on, maybe even gotten a new girlfriend. I had been left behind. Jasper was probably better off without me.

"Okay," I whispered quietly.

"Thank you," Carlisle said quietly, and I looked up and saw a tear rolling down his cheek. "You know there are reasons why Jasper left, don't you? He wanted to wait but… I'll let him explain when he gets back next month,"

"When did he go out?" I choked, tears streaming from my eyes.

"About a month after you had gone," he said softly. "He had done most of his training at school beforehand, so he only had to do another three months. He was a good student; he got transferred to Afghanistan straight afterwards."

"Have you heard from him since?" I asked desperately. I couldn't cope if he was hurt in any way.

"From time to time. He never has much to tell us. He misses you too much. He isn't the same person anymore. He needs you Alice, but you can't tell him. Please."  
"I promise I won't," I whispered. "I promise,"

Carlisle smiled faintly, and then started to wrap gauze around some of my nastier cuts.

"Dr Whitlock?" someone asked from the door. I looked up. Two policemen were at the door, their faces grave. I recognized one as Constable Ryans. He smiled at me. "Can we have a word with Alice please?" he asked Carlisle. He nodded, and finished wrapping my arm in bandage.

"We're going to talk to the girls together," the other policeman said. "Is it okay if we get Alice in the same room as the other two?"

"Yep, that's fine," Carlisle said, and he helped me off the bed and supported me to the room next door, where Kate and Bella sat next to each other, on plastic chairs. I burst into tears as soon as I saw them, just seeing them brought back memories of that awful place.

"Shush it's okay," Carlisle whispered to me, carefully lowering me into a plastic chair next to Bella. "They just want to ask a few questions," Bella picked up my hand and squeezed it, and I smiled at her through my tears. She had been so strong the past year, stronger than I had been. I shivered slightly at the cold plastic beneath me, and Kate looked at me, worry in her blue eyes. I smiled. It had been so long since I'd seen Kate's eyes. I examined the skin between the bruises and was shocked to see how white it was. It was like snow, I could have sworn it even glowed slightly.

"I'm Constable Smith, and I believe you've already met Constable Ryans," the policeman said. I nodded.

"We know you've been through a tough time, but we need you to tell us everything you can remember," I saw Bella flinched into me and I cringed. Was Bella afraid of all strangers? Had the experience completely messed her up?

"I don't know where to start," Kate whispered.

"Tell me about how James took you," Constable Smith said kindly.

"It all started seven years ago," she breathed. I was walking along and suddenly there were arms around my waist and I was being dragged towards a van. I tried to scream but a hand was put over my mouth. It was dark, there was no one around. I was put into the van and the man started to drive. Minutes later we stopped, and the door opened again. I tried to get out, but I was pushed backwards. And a little girl was put inside. As soon as the door closed she burst into tears. I said hello and she asked who I was. I told her my name, and she told me hers. She was Alice. We were taken to a house, I don't know where, somewhere far away. Somewhere no one could find us,"  
"Except Jasper," I cut in quietly.

"What?" Constable Ryans asked. "Who's Jasper?" I cringed at his name and Kate sighed sadly.

"My boyfriend," I breathed.

"This Jasper saw you while you were kidnapped?"  
"No," I sighed. "I heard him. I think it was him, I heard him call out and it sounded so much like him. He was calling my name."

"Wait, Jasper Whitlock?" Constable Smith asked me. I nodded and he smiled. "He looked so desperately for you, but he couldn't look any longer. Is he still in Afghanistan?" I nodded again, tears welling up in my eyes.

"What's Af-gan-stan?" Bella whispered to me.

"A country Bells," I whispered back. She nodded, but I don't think she really understood.

"So you heard Jasper call out?" said Constable Ryans.

"Yes," I said quietly.

"Wait just one second." He left the room, and came back a few minutes later with Carlisle.

"Dr Whitlock, I know this may be hard to remember, but did Jasper ever call out Alice's name, loudly I would presume." Carlisle looked at me, confused.

"Errr, he didn't really say her name much, it seemed to hurt him," he said slowly. "Oh, wait. He got upset one day, and ran into the forest. He screamed Alice, twice I think."  
"He came," I breathed, and Kate looked at me, wonder in her big eyes. "He actually came,"

"You heard?" Carlisle asked, shocked. I nodded. "We stopped looking in that forest after that," he said slowly, regret clear on his beautiful face. "We had to take him to hospital. If I'd have known…"

"It's okay," I murmured, so quiet I wondered if he'd heard it.

"Dr Whitlock, where were you, when this happened?" Constable Smith asked.

"Cranberry Woods, a little south of Clarksdale," he replied. Constable Smith ran out of the room, speaking into his radio.

"Okay, Kate, Alice, Bella. Do you want to tell me the rest of your story?" Constable Ryans asked. Kate took a deep breath and carried on, telling him every detail she could remember. I remembered how horribly ill I was after that first time, how I wouldn't speak, wouldn't tell anyone my story. Kate had been through it far longer than I had, yet she still managed to recount the story without crying. Finally it was finished, and I burst into tears. Again. Kate did the same. All three of us walked out of the room, hand in hand and we heard a yelp.

"Bellllaaaa!" someone yelled, and a flash of bronze and green blew me. Edward pulled Bella into his arms, lifting her off the ground a little.

"Edward?" Bella asked, shocked. Kate smiled at me, she had heard so much about Edward from Bella. Edward looked so cute in his green sweatshirt, that I just couldn't help bending down and hugging him, which meant that I was immersed in a sudden group hug with Edward and Bella, seeing as he wouldn't let her go.

"Ooof, girl germs!" Edward yelled, and pulled away from me. I laughed, and realised it was my first proper laugh in a year.

"Alice!" Esme ran towards me, her caramel curls bouncing on her shoulders and she pulled me into her arms. I sobbed into her shoulder and she rubbed me on the back.

"Hey Alice," Rosalie said to me quietly. I unhooked myself from Esme's grasp and launched myself at Rosalie. I had barely even talked to the girl! But it felt so good to see her again. She laughed. "I missed you too," she whispered in my ear. I looked over to Edward and Bella. They were sitting on a bench, murmuring quietly to each other. Their hands were locked together, unbreakable.

"Jasper misses you," Esme said to me, quietly.

"How do you know?" I asked, my voice cracking.

"When he sends us letters, they're always the same," she told me gently. "He asks how everyone is, then he asks about you. He asks if the police have found anything, he wants to know if they're looking for you hard enough. The bulk of his letters are about you. And he'll snap at us- as much as you can through a letter- if we don't tell him enough about you."

"He hasn't moved on?" I asked, voicing my fear.  
"Alice, he could never move on from you," Esme sighed softly. She caught my hand and squeezed it, and I leant into her shoulder, tears running down my cheeks.

"Alice?" someone said tentatively. My mom walked towards me. "Are you okay honey?" I nodded slowly.

"Mom, this is Esme." I sniffed. "Jasper's mom. Esme, this is my mom."

"Hi," Esme said, holding out a hand. My mother shook it, and looked at me.

"They said it would be best for you to stay here for a couple of weeks, okay sweetheart?" my mom asked. It had been such a long time since she called me that. I nodded. "Like I said, it's only for a couple of weeks. Just to check you're okay, you've had a rough time this last year." I nodded again, and she bit her lip. I realised I wasn't speaking much, and I spoke quickly to cover my mistake.

"That's okay mom," I said. "I'm really tired anyway, and I think I will be for the next couple of weeks. Plus I don't think I'm ready to face the outside yet." My mom nodded.

Emmett walked around the corner, a crying woman behind him.

"Bella!" she cried. Bella looked up, confused.

"Hello?" she said, it was more like a question. The woman ran towards her and picked her up in her arms.

"I missed you baby," she sang. Edward stood up and growled. He actually growled, a loud grumbling sound came out of is mouth. The woman looked at him, shock etched on her face.

"'Scuse me," Bella asked. "But who are you?" The woman put Bella down, and retreated several steps. Emmett put his hand on her shoulder.

"Bella?" he said quietly. "You remember Mom don't you?" Bella shook her head.

"I don't think so," she whispered shyly.

**AN:  
Sorry that took so long to update, I've been really really busy, and have no time to stop. I'll try and update tomorrow, but if I don't then I won't have an update up until Monday. I'm literally out all weekend. Saturday morning I'm going out shopping to buy clothes for my concert, then I have a two and a half hour rehearsal. I'm coming home, getting ready, then going babysitting. I don't come back until midnight, then the next day I have practices all day, then I have the show in the evening. I'm going to be so tired at school on Monday!! I think most of you liked the first chapter, some people didn't, but I guess you can't please everyone. Most of the reviews were positive :D Inspiration for this came from a Fab and For Good, from Wicked. I sang it in my singing lesson on Tuesday and realised it fitted perfectly to this!! It's such a sweet song, and my friend is singing it in this concert as a duet. Good luck Lucy, you'll be amazing. I heard your singing lesson :P**


	13. Forgetting

**AN: So, before I start, I want to say thank you soooo much to the person who nominated me for Stephaniiie's Twilight All Human Fanfiction Awards. I love Stephaniiie's stories so much (If you haven't read them, go check them out) and saw she was having a contest, but I never thought in a million years that I would be entered. The link is http://www(dot)twilightallhumanawards(dot)webs(dot)com/ Please please vote for me after 1****st**** August, when the voting starts!! And thank you who ever nominated me, I don't know who you are, but leave me a review :) **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight blablabla**

Forgetting

Renée looked at Bella, shock plastered on her face.

"You don't remember me Bells?" she whispered. Bella shook her head. Kate caught hold of my hand, I could hear her breathing quicken beside me. Her hand was cold and clammy. I gasped in oxygen, realising I hadn't been breathing. Renée had become just some woman to Bella, a woman that she didn't know anymore, a woman from a time long ago. Bella looked at Emmett, then at me, tears welling up in her eyes.

"Did I do something wrong?" she whispered. Emmett ran over to her and scooped her up.

"No Bella, you didn't do anything wrong. You just don't remember. It's okay. It's been a long time," Tears poured down Renée's cheeks, her face a picture of horror.

"You're scaring her," I hissed. I couldn't let anyone hurt Bella, not now.

Bella clutched at Emmett's arm, looking in shock at the crying lady that stood in front of her.

"Ali," she moaned, reaching towards me. I stood next to Emmett and Bella held my hand from his arms.

"Why can't you remember? What did he do to you?" Renée sobbed. Esme walked over to her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"It's okay," she whispered.

"Easy for you to say!" Renée screeched. "Your kid didn't get abducted by some crazy lunatic," Esme looked shocked. Then she did something I never thought I would see her do.

"My son was Alice's boyfriend," she yelled at Renée. "You didn't have to see him cry every day; you didn't have to see your son become nothing more than a person. You didn't watch your son join the army, because he couldn't take life here without Alice. And despite the fact that I only met her a few times before her kidnap, she still feels like a daughter to me!" Renée took a step back. I looked at Rosalie, my eyes wide. I'd never seen Esme lose control; I'd never expected her to get angry. "Oh, I'm sorry," Esme gasped, she seemed to realise what she'd just said. "I'm sorry." And before we knew it, the two mothers were hugging and crying and apologizing. I sighed. This was going to be a long couple of weeks.

**Rosalie POV**

"Rose, get the post will you?" Carlisle asked me, reading medical notes and eating a piece of toast. I nodded reluctantly and walked gracefully to the door. I always walked gracefully. It was something I could do easily. I stopped at the mirror in the hall and checked my hair. Esme had threatened to take that mirror down so many times, but I knew she never would. Me checking my reflection wasn't enough for her to upset the "balance" of a room.

I picked up the wad of letters sitting on the doormat and I flicked through them. Bill, bill, postcard from Aunt Carmen and Uncle Eleazar. I scanned it quickly, then put it into my other hand. I picked up the last letter. It was for me. I grinned, I loved it when letters were for me. I skipped back into the kitchen, and handed Carlisle the other letters, carefully opening mine. I looked at the thick piece of paper, and recognized Jasper's handwriting immediately. _Rose, don't open this in front of everyone. Go to your room. _It said on it. I pushed back my chair, and it scraped loudly on the floor. I winced, but Carlisle didn't look up from the postcard. I ran up the stairs and slammed the door to my room, unfolding the thick letter.

_Rosalie, _

_Sorry I wouldn't let you read the letter in the kitchen. If anyone saw it was from me, apologize from me to them too. But, I feel that you're the only person I can talk to right now, and I didn't really want everyone hearing all of this. There's only so much sadness a family can stand. _

_It's the same here, you've heard it all already, and I suspect you won't want to hear it again. I won't be surprised if you don't even read the letter properly. If you do, sorry about that, but you know you don't usually read letters. You find them boring if they're not about you. I'm your twin, I should know. _

_I'm writing because, this isn't what I expected. I was hoping what with all the action, I'd at least be able to push Alice to the back of my mind, to forget for just a few minutes. Maybe that does happen when we get some action, but in the long days where we don't have anything to do, all I can think about is her. And it hurts Rose, it hurts more than the pain any man could put me through here. And then I realise I'm being selfish because, if Alice is alive, she'll be going through more pain. I so want her to be alive Rose, to be hoping. And I'm also scared of that, the hoping. Is she waiting for me to find her? Because I want to find her, but I just can't, I can't. I don't even think I'm being coherent anymore. _

_Have you heard any news Rosalie? Because if you have, you would tell me, wouldn't you? I'm coming over in three weeks. But you probably know that, Esme will have it written on the calendar. I have four weeks here, and then I'm coming back. It will be hard for me, seeing all the places Alice and I went together, thinking about the things we did, but I have to come back, I can't hurt you and the rest of the family any more than you've already been hurt. _

_People talk about their loved ones, their wives, husbands, girlfriends and boyfriends. They asked me once if I ever had a girlfriend. I told them I did. Because I still love Alice, so much. And I hope she still loves me. There I am, hoping again. But I couldn't answer the questions they asked me about her. I couldn't even tell them her name. They presumed it was a bad break-up, or that she died. They know I'm in pain, they're not stupid. _

_Anyway, if you read this, then I've probably bored you stupid with all my depressing talk. Sorry Rose. Love you. _

_Love Jazz_

_xx_

I stared at the letter. Anger flared through me. He thought I didn't read letters unless they were about me? That wasn't fair! But slowly, the anger seeped away and I burst into tears. I wanted to tell him so much that Alice was back. But I couldn't, I had been told not to. Why I don't know, but I wasn't allowed. I sighed, and opened my diary. _Jasper coming home_ was pencilled in on the 19th. I suddenly couldn't wait.

I looked in my mirror, wiped away the smudges and re-did my make-up. Then I skipped downstairs, pretending nothing had just happened.

**Alice POV**

"Alice, you can go home today, if you want,"" Carlisle said to me softly. I nodded. I had been fine the past two weeks, surprisingly. The police still hadn't found James. They had found the house, but there was no one there, and even though there were still policemen stationed outside, no one had turned up. James wasn't stupid. He knew we would have alerted the police as soon as we got back. My guess was that him and Victoria had gotten out of there pretty quickly.

I blinked in the light as I stepped outside, Cynthia clinging on to my arm. I immediately cringed into her and she rubbed my arm sympathetically, even though she didn't know what I was scared about. It was the outside that worried me, the possibility of being taken again. James was still out there, waiting. He would wait forever if it meant getting us back. My mom took hold of my hand and I jumped as her skin touched me. It was different here than before. In our excitement, we hadn't even really noted the fact that we were outside. Now I was all too aware of the fact. And it scared me.

My mother led me over to the car and I sighed in relief when I felt the shiny leather underneath me. The car was familiar and warm, it was safe. But I still sank as low in my chair as I could go, hoping that James wouldn't drive past. My Dad looked at me sympathetically. I didn't want their sympathy. I wanted Jasper to be here with me, holding my hand as I walked to the car, making sure I wasn't scared. I wanted to write him a letter, spill out every secret. Rose had shown me the letter Jasper had sent her. I had cried, a lot. I knew he would be angry when he got back, knowing that I had been home for a month without him knowing. But I hoped that the anger would be overridden by him wanting to see me.

The car jolted to a stop and I flinched. I didn't want to get out. But I knew I had to, I couldn't just stay in there forever. I opened the door slowly, and ran quickly to the door. Dad stuck the key in the lock and turned it, and I ran inside and straight up to my room.

I opened the door, but it got stuck on something. I pushed hard and it opened. I gasped. Debris littered my room, drawers had been flung open, photographs lay on the floor, and my diary was laying open, the words _I'm Sorry Kate _jumping out at me. I started to hyperventilate. Had James found my house, looked through my room.

"MOM!" I screamed, breaking down on the carpet. She ran into my room seconds later, looking around. "Whathappenedtomyroom?" I asked quickly. "DidJamescomeback, isheafterme?"

"Honey, it's okay, stay calm," she reassured me, bending down next to me. "It was Jasper,"

"Jasper?" I asked. Why would Jasper ruin my room? And it had stayed like this for more than six months? I looked at my diary and realised that it was covered in a thick layer of dust. It must have been there for a while.

"He was here a couple of days after you went missing," she said quietly. "He was looking for something to help him find you I think. I saw him, he was really upset. He also wasn't meant to be here in the early morning hours I must add, but I let him off. He misses you."

I sighed and put my head in my hands. I couldn't wait two weeks. I had to see Jasper, and now. Why was this world so unfair?

**AN: Okay, sorry that was quite short, but I'm going to end it there. Sorry it took so long to update, been rehearsing literally all weekend and I'm so tired. I left in the mornings at about ten and then didn't get back until eleven. I sometimes had about half an hour at home, and that was it. I got back so late because I had babysitting on Saturday and it was my concert last night. Me and my friend Lucy were really annoyed because we didn't even get a break between rehearsals to go to Starbucks! (We were meant to, but they were running late). So sorry it was so late! Anyway, person who nominated me, please tell me your name in a review!! I want to know who nominated me!**


	14. Airport

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Stephenie Meyer does. **

Airport

Someone knocked on the door and I bounded down the stairs to answer it. Esme smiled at me when I swung it open and I walked behind her to the car, practically bouncing up and down with excitement.

I was greeted with a chorus of "Hi Alice!" when I opened the door, but I could do nothing but grin. Edward chatted away animatedly next to me, mostly about Bella and what they had done that day.

Rosalie turned to look at me, grinning. She was almost as excited as I was. Everyone- except for Edward- was silent. I was shaking in anticipation. I had been waiting for this day for a month.

It was a long journey to the Gulfport-Biloxi Airport, or maybe it was just the time dragging itself out. Even Edward had stopped talking now, occasionally letting out a small excited squeak. Esme bustled us over to arrivals, and we stood, waiting. Jasper's plane wasn't due for another 40 minutes. I groaned. Carlisle grinned at me.

"Be patient Alice," he laughed.

"I can't be patient!" I exclaimed, dancing around in a little circle. "I'm seeing my Jazz again! Jasper Jasper Jasper!"

"JASPER!" yelled Edward, joining in with my game. We all laughed, people were staring. I didn't care, I was seeing him again, he would be here.

"Jasper," Rosalie giggled.

"Jaaaaasssppppeeeerrr!" I sang.

"Jasper," Edward growled in such a deep voice that we burst into hysterics. Moods were on such a high that I almost didn't notice the little sign popping up to say that Jasper's plane had landed. I screamed, and several heads shot up from their newspapers to see what the noise was all about. Jasper would be here in a matter of minutes. I started doing a dance again, Rosalie joining in with me. Edward clapped his little hands, laughing in delight. People started to flood through the gates, and I craned my neck to see if I could see him. Everywhere people were hugging and kissing.

"Get out my way!" I shrieked, and several people moved, looking at me with wary eyes. "JASPER!" I screamed.

"Rose, is that you?" someone called. "I'm here!" I saw a hand wave from about fifty yards away, and I ran towards it. I stopped dead in my tracks. Jasper stood there, Edward in his arms, Esme hugging him. Rosalie and Carlisle stood looking at me, smiling. Jasper wasn't smiling; there was sadness in his eyes I had never seen before.

"Jazz," I whispered so quietly I wasn't sure if he had heard, but his head shot up.

"Alice?" he breathed.

**Jasper POV**

I stared at the fluffy clouds stretching out beneath me. How I wished I could just jump onto them, so that the last thing I would feel would be softness, and then I would die. Who was I kidding, clouds weren't soft. They were wet and cold. They looked beautiful, but were a disappointment once you found out what they really were.

I sighed and stopped staring out of the window. It only depressed me more. The girl in the chair next to me fluttered her eyelids at me.

"Hi, I'm Jessica," she said in a high pitched voice that made my insides crawl. "What's your name?"

"Jasper," I replied gruffly.

"Oh, they go together perfectly!" she shrieked. "Jasper and Jessica!" Oh! Do you live in Biloxi?"

"I guess," I said slowly. I wasn't really what you would call living there. The place held too many memories for me ever to live there.

"Do you want to go out and have a coffee or something sometime?" she asked.

"No," I said sharply. I wasn't in the mood for people to be asking me out.

"Oh," she said, looking hurt at the rejection, but she smiled and continued.

"Don't you like coffee?" she questioned. "'Cause we don't have to get coffee, we can go have a picnic in the park if you want…"

"I have a girlfriend," I interrupted. She looked put out.

"What's her name?" she asked.

"Alice," I replied, wincing at her name.

"She put you through a hard time?" Jessica's voice was really getting on my nerves.

"More than you could ever imagine," I murmured under my breath.

"Well, you can always come and stay with me if you have a fight with her," she purred. I closed my eyes.

"I don't have fights with her," I growled. "I wish I did."

"Ohh, so it's that awkward kind of not talking to each other," she said slowly. "That's even worse sometimes." Jessica had cut my last nerve.

"No, it's not that," I snarled. "Alice was kidnapped last year. I haven't seen her since. Now please piss off and leave me alone." But Jessica just smiled and ran her tongue over her front teeth in what I supposed she thought was a seductive manner.

"So technically, you're a free man…" she mused. I groaned and grabbed the headset the flight attendant had given me, plugging the earphones into my ears so I wouldn't have to listen to Jessica rambling on. I didn't pay attention to the film. I thought about Alice, and how much I missed everything about her, the tiny smile that played across her lips when she was happy, her beautiful laugh, and her soft, spiky, dark hair.

The plane landed, and I joined the crowd of people queuing to leave the plane. Jessica smiled at me. I frowned.

"Hey, you're a soldier right?" she asked, glancing down at my uniform. I nodded. "Could you get my bag down for me?" she asked, pouting and pointing at the overhead luggage compartment. "It's so heavy I can't get it down," I sighed and pulled her bag out for her. It was feather light. I raised my eyebrows. "Thanks Jasper," she smiled. I shook my head and began to move with the people slowly walking down the plane.

I groaned as the crowd of people walked slowly to the gates. I hated Biloxi. Even the accents here reminded me of Alice. Then in front of me, the crowds began to embrace there families and partners. I sighed.

"Get out of my way!" someone screamed. "JASPER?"

"Rose is that you?" I called out. "I'm over here!" I waved my arm, and suddenly my family surrounded me. I picked Edward up and whirled him around. He laughed in delight. Esme ran towards me and hugged me around the waist. Carlisle and Rosalie just stood by my side, looking at something and smiling. I didn't care what it was, knowing Rosalie it was probably her reflection and Carlisle probably someone he knew. I was just glad to see everyone again.

"Jazz," a familiar voice whispered quietly, and my head snapped up. Alice stood there, a small smile on her lips, combined with shock in her eyes. Bruises spread across her cheekbones, and cuts made long lines down her arms. She grinned.

"Alice?" I asked. She bit her lip. "Alice? Oh Alice, it's you!" I ran towards her and pulled her into my arms. She met my lips with hers, they were rough and chapped.

"I love you," she whispered in my ear.

"I love you more than the world," I laughed, pulling her tighter. "And I'm pretty damn happy with the world right now." I ran my fingers over her bruises and cuts, and I felt a lump in my throat. "Oh Alice, what's happened to you. He's used you as a knife sharpener." She buried her head into my shoulder and I rubbed her back.

"I missed you, so much," she choked.

"How long have you been home?" She gulped. "Alice, how long have you been home?" I repeated.

"A month," she whispered.

"A month!" I gasped. She nodded. "Why didn't you tell me? Send me a letter?" It hurt that Alice had been home for that long and I hadn't known. She didn't say anything, but her beautiful blue eyes flicked to Carlisle and then back to me. I narrowed my eyes at him. "We'll talk about this later Dad," I growled. He sighed.

"Jasper, me and Bella are boyfriend and girlfriend," Edward told me excitedly. Alice grinned at me.

"Really?" I asked. "Well you'd better look after her then."

"I do." Edward said seriously. "She's very clumsy." Everyone laughed and I linked my hand with Alice's. Never in a million years would I expect her to be back here. I kissed her soft hair and she closed her eyes and smiled.

"You're as beautiful as ever," I whispered in her ear.

"Same with you," she giggled. "But you shaved your hair off," She ran her hand over the short fuzz that covered my head.

"Army, remember," I said, tapping my head. But I gulped as soon as I thought of the army. How was I going to go back if it meant leaving Alice? I couldn't do it, not for the second time. Alice looked at me sadly, as if she was on the same train of thought as me and she squeezed my hand.

"You have to meet Kate," she said quickly, changing the subject. "And Bella's grown so much." I smiled at her. She was always thinking of other people. She toyed with the hem of her skirt, looking around her warily as if for danger. I wound my arm around her waist and she relaxed.  
"Will you tell me what happened there, when we get home?" I asked. She nodded and pulled herself closer to me. Jessica walked past us, looking like she had just swallowed a lemon. She threw a dirty look at Alice, who looked pretty startled.

"Stupid slut," I heard her murmur as she walked away from us. I narrowed my eyes at her, stepping in front of Alice as if to shield her from Jessica's harsh words.

"It's okay," Alice breathed, turning me round and kissing me lightly. "It's natural for people to be jealous when I'm with someone as beautiful as you," I laughed.

"I think you've got that the wrong way round," I chuckled, bending down so I could kiss her better; she tasted like cinnamon, the way I remembered.

"Don't ever lose hope again Jasper Whitlock," she murmured against my skin.

**AN: I had to get them back together!! Still a lot of story to come, some unexpected things lie around corners… Especially since James and Victoria are still out there. And Jasper can't stay home forever… Seriously, this story is going to have so many twists it's insane. Thank you Kerry, who was the one who nominated me for the Twilight contest :D You're simply the best! Anyway, hope you liked it, won't be any more updates until…maybe Saturday, because tomorrow I'm at school (boo) and then I'm going to my friends house and we're going to go and see Alesha Dixon and the Saturdays!! The next day it's an inset day, so I'm probably going to Brighton which is coool. Hopefully it will be a nice day!**


	15. Never Say Never

**There's some things we don't talk about  
Rather do without  
And just hold the smile  
Falling in and out of love  
Ashamed and proud of  
Together all the while**

You can never say never  
Why we don't know when  
Time and time again  
Younger now than we were before

Don't let me go  
Don't let me go  
Don't let me go

**Never Say Never-The Fray**

**(Thought I'd put a song quote in this time)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…**

Never Say Never

**Alice POV**

I saw Emmett and Bella sitting on the front step of Jasper's house as we sped around the corner. They stood up as soon as we came around the corner. We stopped and Jasper threw open the door, running around the car. Emmett hugged Jasper.

"I missed you, man!" he laughed. Bella ran to my side and clutched onto my hand. She put her thumb into her mouth.

"Hey Bella," Jasper said gently. "Remember me?" She nodded shyly.

"You're Jasper," she said quietly. "Alice missed you," Edward ran over to Bella and clasped her hand in his.

"Edward tells me that you're boyfriend and girlfriend," Jasper grinned. She nodded seriously.

"We're going to get married," she told him. He laughed. "It's not funny!" she pouted, her cheeks rapidly turning red. Edward giggled a little bit. "What?" she cried out.

"You look funny when you're red," he told her. Esme opened the door and he dragged her into the house.

"How are the lovebirds holding up then?" Emmett asked us as we walked into the house. I stuck my tongue out at him. He laughed.

"Better than ever," Jasper chuckled, squeezing my hand. I looked into his eyes, and didn't let my gaze falter. They were so blue, sparkling like a huge expanse of deep sea… Emmett waved his hand in front of my face.

"If you're going to keep doing that Alice, then I'll just stop talking to you," Emmett laughed. "I'm not being ignored for the next six weeks." I grinned slyly, and then pushed Emmett. He lost his balance, falling onto the sofa. I laughed and ran out the room, Jasper in hysterics on the floor and Emmett chasing after me.

"You got beat by a girl!" I sang, running up the stairs.

"Not for long," Emmett called, making thumps on each step. I ran down the hall, hiding in the first room I came to. I slammed the door and turned around. Carlisle was looking at me, one eyebrow raised. I put my finger to my lips and he rolled his eyes.

"Oh Alice!" Emmett shouted down the hallway. "I'm going to find you!" I slowly pushed open the door, and slid out of it. Emmett was standing with his back to me. I grinned. I ran towards him and pounced, jumping on his back and putting my hands over his eyes. "Hey!" he exclaimed, stumbling forwards. He tried to push me off, but I clung tight. Jasper walked up the stairs, and I waved at him, uncovering Emmett's eye for a second. Emmett tried to take advantage of this factor, but I covered it up again quickly. Jasper roared with laughter as Emmett fell forwards, screaming like a girl. I laughed and jumped off him, hiding behind Jasper.

Emmett jumped up and lunged towards me, laughing. Both Jasper and I darted out of the way, and Emmett fell over again.

"Now if you've stopped stealing my girlfriend, I'm going to take her to my room," Jasper chuckled. Emmett wolf whistled loudly and I could feel myself turning red. Jasper took me by the hand and we walked to his room, Emmett shouting innuendos behind us.

"I want you to tell me about what happened," Jasper whispered in my ear, once we were in his room and my head was resting on his shoulder. "In that…place,"

I sighed and recounted my story, the same one I had told the police about ten times. Jasper winced a lot, but he didn't interrupt. Once I had finished, he squeezed me tight, and we were silent for a while.

"I'm sorry I left," he finally said slowly. "I'd looked everywhere, and I couldn't find you. Emmett had given up looking a couple of weeks before. I was a wreck, I wasn't the same person as I was when I was with you. I was empty. My family were upset, because I was upset. It killed them to watch me endlessly search for you. So I left. Carlisle thought that I should try and do something, to take my mind off it. So I did what I would have done if I had never met you. I joined the army. But I still couldn't forget. I missed you so much. I'm not going back." I looked up at him, my face a perfect picture of shock.

"You are going back Jazz," I growled. He looked at me.

"Alice, I can't,"

"If you get arrested, for going AWOL, then what am I going to do?" I snarled. "You can get up to eighteen months. If you want to leave, then give your twelve months notice, then in twelve months you can come back. At least then, you can get another job. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get another job once you've been in prison?"  
"Alice, I can't go back there, not without you!" he moaned.

"You managed to go there before," I snapped. "You left me before, so do it again. Just fucking go Jasper."

"You don't know what I went through out there!" he exploded. "Sure, you were having a worse time than me, but I still had a pretty shit time without you. But you always come first, don't you Alice? And there are bombs, guns, people being held hostage, things worse than men cutting your arms." I stood there, frozen. I let out a strangled sob, and ran out of his room, down the stairs.

"Alice, are you okay?" Esme asked as I ran past her and out of the door, slamming it behind me. I ran down the road, tears streaming down my cheeks. It was only after a few minutes of running that I realised I was in the dark. I shrieked in shock. Dark. Dark. I started to hyperventilate, my breath rushing in and out. A van drove past and I screamed, even though it didn't even slow.

"Jasper?" I asked. No one answered. Dark. Dark. It surrounded me, the blackness, and I was alone in it. A car came down the road and I screamed again. It stopped next to me and I stumbled backwards, tripping over my feet. Someone got out and pulled me up, hugging me to them.

"It's okay Ali, it's okay," they whispered. "I'll get you home," Kate's soft hair brushed against my cheek and I began to calm down. She helped me into the car next to her, and Tanya smiled at me from the front. "What happened?" Kate asked me as we began to drive.

"Me and Jasper had a fight," I whispered. "Then it was so dark," Kate hugged me again.

"How do you get to your house?" she asked me. I gave her the directions, and then leant back on the leather seat. Jasper and I had just had our first ever fight. It tore my heart into tiny pieces and broke me apart. I tucked my knees under my arms, and tried to hold the tears back. We pulled up outside my house.

"Make sure you make up with Jasper," Kate said to me as she hugged me goodbye. I smiled weakly at her, and ran inside.

"You're back early," my mom chirped as I ran through the hall, I didn't stop, I just kept running. I blew into my room and threw myself on my bed. My phone vibrated on my bedside table and I picked it up and glanced at the screen. Ten missed calls. Every single one was from Jasper. But I didn't care. I huddled in a ball under my duvet, and cried myself to sleep.

**Jasper's POV**

Alice stared at me for a second, then ran out of the room. I couldn't do anything but stand there, breathing heavily. Emmett walked in, confused.

"What happened, couldn't she get the condom on?" he laughed. Then he saw my face and stopped laughing. "Are you all right?" I shook my head. I felt numb. I had just hurt Alice beyond any physical pain, and I felt awful. Why had I done it? "Jasper?" Emmett asked. Esme stormed into the room.

"Jasper, what happened to Alice?" she asked, furious. I was silent. "If you did anything to hurt her… She's so fragile at the moment. And now she's in the dark, on her own. I couldn't catch up with her." I swore and ran out the door. The street was empty. A car was at the end, but it was driving away. I dialled Alice's number in to my cell, and waited. No answer. I called again. No answer. I had to tell her I was sorry. Would she forgive me?

**That's quite a short chapter, but I thought that was quite a good finish. I'm so tired… it's only Saturday and it has been such a busy weekend!! Two and a half days left of school!! We'll just be watching DVDs for the next few days now :D**


	16. Make Up

**Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine. I'm reading it again though (I've lost count of how many times I have read those books. They take over my life). **

Make up

I could hear the tapping again. I knew what it was. But I didn't know if I had the heart to answer it. The tapping got louder. "Go away," I groaned, pulling my pillow over my head. The tapping got even louder, and my phone started to buzz for about the twentieth time tonight. I answered it.

"Piss off Jasper, you'll break the window," I groaned into the phone, and hung up. The tapping stopped.

Five minutes later my phone buzzed again, but this time it was short and sharp. He'd texted me. _I'm so sorry. Please let me in, I have to talk to you. Love you xx _I sighed and put the phone down, walking to Cynthia's room. I opened the window, returned to mine, and sat on my bed, waiting. I didn't look up when he walked in.

"Hey," he breathed. I still didn't look up. "Alice, I'm so sorry," he blurted out. "I didn't mean what I said,"  
"But you said it," I whispered. "And you meant it,"

"No, I didn't!" he protested. "I was upset, and I don't want to leave you, but deep down inside I know I have to. And I'm so angry at myself, and I was taking it out on you," I bit my lip, yet another tear spilling from my eye.

"I don't want you to go back," I whispered. "But I know you have to, and it hurts. Hurts worse than anything James could do to me. Because when you leave, I'll be scared again. Scared of what could happen to me,"

"We have six weeks together," he said softly, kneeling down in front of me and lifting up my chin so I looked into his blue eyes. "Six weeks. We won't see each other for another six months after that, but we're both going to have to be strong. I'll be back here in another year, forever."

"I know," I told him, stroking his cheek. "But I'll miss you," He kissed me, and our lips pressed together in different ways than before, these kisses were more desperate, more passionate. "I love you," I gasped. And our clothes fluttered away like autumn leaves on a breeze, and I loved him more than I'd ever loved him before.

Sunlight streamed through my window, turning my eyelids red and warming my face. I was lying on Jaspers chest, I could feel the smooth contours of it underneath me, and it felt better than I would ever have imagined. I snuggled into him and he started to draw patterns on my back with his hand.

"Good morning beautiful," he chuckled.

"Morning," I yawned. "Whassa time?"

"Ten," he replied. I swore, and fell out of bed, quickly grabbing a sheet to cover me up. "What?"

"My mom will come in here in a minute, to see why I haven't woken up and to ask why I was so upset last night," Jasper looked guilty, but I just shoved his shorts at him. "Put some clothes on!" I pleaded with him, pulling a dressing gown around myself. As I pushed him into my closet, someone knocked and the door opened.

"Hey," I said sleepily, leaning against the wardrobe door.

"Alice, are you okay?" my mom asked warily.  
"I'm fine," I said sweetly. "Jasper and I had a fight, but he called me and it's all sorted out." She raised her eyebrows, but left it, and walked out of the room. I ran to the door and shut it, and Jasper poked his head around the edge of the closet door.

"Are you physic or something?" he asked.

"Nope, just amazing," I laughed, running towards him and kissing him.

"And beautiful," Jasper added, stroking my hair.

"That too," I giggled, and he poked my ribs so that I squealed.

"So, I'm guessing you haven't gone back to school yet then?" he asked me. I grimaced.

"I start next week. I don't want to go back," he laughed, and sat on the bed, pulling me into his lap.  
"You'll be fine," he reassured me.

"But, Emmett and Rosalie have left," A lump was rising in my throat. "And you're not coming back."  
"Relax," Jasper soothed me. "You only have less than a year left. And you'll be all interesting now you've been kidnapped."  
"I wasn't before," I murmured.

"Before you were in hospital for six years," he said gently. "People had almost forgotten you were even kidnapped."

"I guess. I'm going to have a shower," I told him. "If anyone knocks, hide in the closet again," He laughed.

"Your closet is big enough to fit ten people!" I made a face at him, and then padded to the bathroom. The hot water relaxed me, made me forget about school, and whatever lurked there, waiting for me.

"So, what are we doing today?" I asked Jasper once back in my room rifling through my clothes to find something to wear.

"Whatever you want!" he chortled. I made a face, trying to think of something to do. Then I could feel a smile light up my face.

"Shopping!" I squealed, jumping up and down. I hadn't been shopping in so long. My parents didn't take me, and I hadn't wanted to go on my own. Jasper raised an eyebrow, but agreed, and I skipped all the way to his house to pick up his car.

"You can drive now?" I asked, looking at the beautiful car.

"Yep," Jasper smiled. "But this isn't my car, it's Rosalie's. I never really got around to buying one."

"It's beautiful," I grinned. "It's a BMW M3 right?" Jasper nodded, shocked. I grinned. "I know my cars," I stuck my tongue out at him and he laughed.

"I heard Edward talking to Bella about his dream car last night," he chuckled. "Edward knew everything about it, and knows everything about most cars. Bella looked very vacant, and when asked what her dream car was, she said, and I quote, 'a red truck'. I don't think Edward was particularly pleased with her decision." I laughed, and made a mental note to pick Bella up some outfits when I was shopping. Those pink dresses were cute, but they were so old fashioned, and Bella hated them anyway.

We pulled up outside the shopping centre and I squealed. It was bigger than I remembered, stretching up to the sky. The sun shone hard against the white walls, so I had to slip some sunglasses over my eyes. I grabbed Jasper's hand, and dragged him through the revolving doors, screeching like a maniac. Several people were staring.

I blew through almost every shop, trying on millions of outfits, buying most of them. I bought some jeans, skirts, and dresses for Bella, along with some T-shirts and leggings. I even trawled the electrical shops, buying items I never knew existed.

By the fiftieth shop, Jasper started to moan, saying he wanted lunch, but I ignored him. I dumped yet more bags in his arms and he mumbled something about putting them in the car. I told him to go, and that I'd meet him by the fountain in fifteen minutes.

I plonked myself down on a bench, ten shopping bags weighing my arms down, I sighed and looked around. Then my gaze focused in on something, and I gave a tiny whimper. I gasped lungfuls of air in to my lungs and as the person turned, I stopped breathing altogether.

Laurent stared at me, his maroon eyes wide in shock. I shook my head in disbelief. His eyes narrowed, and I sunk back onto the bench.

"Hey Ali," Jasper said, sinking onto the bench next to me. My gaze broke from Laurent's, just for a second, and when I looked back, he was gone.

"Let's go," I said quickly, grabbing Jasper's shirt and dragging him towards the exit.

"Can't we get something to eat?" he groaned. "I'm starving!"

"We're going!" I shrieked.

"Are you okay?" he asked slowly, reaching out to stroke my face. I shivered, and turned around and ran. I got to Rosalie's car, and curled up in a ball on the ground, rocking backwards and forwards.

Jasper ran over, worry etched on his face.

"It's okay," he soothed, scooping me off the ground and sliding me into the passenger seat. "What happened?"

"Nothing," I said quickly, remembering what Laurent had said when he dropped us off. "Nothing,"  
"Alice, this isn't nothing." He frowned, looking at the tears sliding down my face.

"It's NOTHING!" I shouted, burying my head in my knees. He stroked my hair, but the engine purred to life. "I love you Jazz," I choked out.

"Don't do this Alice," he said under his breath. "Don't let them ruin you,"

**AN: I cried again! This story is really getting to me!! Only one and a half days left of school woooo! I'm going on holiday on the 31****st**** July, so there will be two weeks where I won't write anything, but I think that's about it for going away and not writing. Oh, I might be going to Isle of Wight for a couple of days, but that shouldn't be too big a break… Not unless my friend tries to abduct me on a pedalo. Thanks for all the reviews, lets try to get it up to 260 for the next chapter :D**


	17. Leaving

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. **

Leaving

_I was running through a building, trying to get away,_

"_You won't escape this time Alice" someone called after me. I let out a sob, continuing to run. _

"_Jasper!" I cried out. "Jazz?" _

"_Jasper's not here!" the person laughed cruelly. "He's not coming back for you. It's okay, I'll end the pain."  
"No!" I screeched, but hands grabbed my arms, twisting me around. James' face loomed in front of me, smirking. But his face started to distort, swirling and changing. Jasper's blue eyes sparkled in the little light there was, and he took a step back, shocked. He pulled a gun out of his pocket. _

"_Alice, get down!" he yelled. I threw myself to the floor, and he fired four shots at something above my head._

I sat straight up, sweat pouring down my face, mingling with the tears. Someone shot up next to me, putting their arms around me.

"Shush Alice, its okay," Jasper breathed, pulling my face into his chest. "It was just a dream," I shook my head. It wasn't like a dream this time, it wasn't fuzzy and dreamlike. It was real. I knew it was. I sobbed into Jasper's chest, breathing in his beautiful scent.

"He's coming back," I cried. "James is coming back."

"No, he can't get you anymore," Jasper growled. "Even when I'm gone, you can't go out at night on your own, someone will be with you all the time."

"He'll get me eventually Jasper," I whispered. "Maybe Kate and Bella too. I have to get away from here."

"Bella's moving," Jasper said quietly.

"What?" I gasped.

"I talked to Chief Swan earlier today. He's getting her away; he doesn't want to lose her again. She and Emmett will be moving away in the next month."  
"But, what about Edward?" I asked.

"Edward will be okay," he said, but I could hear the uncertainty in his voice.

"Another person to miss," I murmured, pressing my face into Jasper so that he didn't see the new moisture building up in my eyes. "Where are they going?" I asked.

"Forks, Washington." He replied. "Charlie grew up there, and there's a space for a chief of police there."  
"But the rain and cold, Bella hates it," I bit my lip, thinking how unhappy Bella would be in a place without Edward, that rains all the time.

"She'll be okay," Jasper said quietly.

"I know," I breathed. "It'll be better for her there. She can make a new start, away from James."

I buried my head back into my pillow and felt Jasper lie down beside me. Somehow, I managed to drift off back to sleep.

"Daddy says I'm going away," Bella said to me, as we walked down the road, hand in hand, Emmett beside us. My eyes filled up with tears and I looked over at Emmett. His head was down, but I saw his Adam's apple move up and down when he gulped.

"You are Bella," I breathed, squeezing her hand.

"I still get to see Edward right?" she asked, and Emmett lifted his head, and looked at me. He bit his lip.

"Bella," I stammered. "You're going to be far away from Edward. You won't be able to see him a lot."  
"But every day still?" she asked. I shook my head. "That's okay!" she sang. "I'll see him every two days,"

Emmett crouched in front of her. "Bells," he whispered. "You won't be able to see Edward for a long long time.

"Longer than a week?" she whimpered.

"Much, much longer than a week." Her chocolate eyes filled with tears.

"NO!" she shrieked. "I'll stay here with Edward and Alice and Jasper. Not going anywhere without Edward!"

"We're going to have to," Emmett sighed. Bella stepped backwards, shaking her head.

"You're mean!" she yelled. She started to run, but Emmett ran after her and picked her up. She struggled in his arms and I burst into tears.

"Don't cry Alice," Emmett pleaded. "You'll make it worse." But the tears kept coming, and when Bella saw my face she started to bawl.

Emmett hoisted Bella over his shoulder in a fireman's lift, and grabbed my hand, turning to walk in the opposite direction we had come from. I knew where we were going. It relaxed me, so the tears slowed and I could walk faster.

When we got to Jasper's house, Bella struggled even harder, so he set Bella down and she ran to the front door, banging her little fists against it. Esme opened it, and Bella pushed past her, running up the stairs.

"Hi Alice, Emmett," Esme said, turning to look up the stairs after Bella. "Is she okay?" I shook my head, and ran to Esme, giving her a hug. Jasper appeared in the hall behind her, and I unlocked myself from her neck and ran to Jasper instead.

"What happened?" he asked.

"She wanted to know if she wouldn't see Edward," I sobbed. Jasper led me into the living room, and I curled up on the couch.

"Want anything to eat Alice?" Esme asked, coming in and sitting next to me and putting her arm around me.  
"Can I have a hot chocolate?" I asked. I needed something warm and comforting. She nodded and smiled, and I followed her to the kitchen, Jasper never letting go of me.

Esme fixed me a hot chocolate, putting cream, marshmallows and a flake on top, and handed it to me.

I took a sip and grinned. Hot chocolate was what I needed to cheer me up a little. Jasper looked at me and laughed.

"What?" I asked.

"You have a cream moustache!" he chortled. I blushed and wiped it off with my hand. I looked up at him from under my lashes and he grinned at me.

"Can we go and see if Emmett's okay?" I asked. He nodded, and I followed him upstairs.

"I think he's in Rosalie's room." He chuckled. "I wish those two would just hurry up and get together." He opened the door and stood there, shocked. I moved around him and let out a startled giggle. Rosalie was sitting on the chest of drawers, her arms around Emmett's neck, kissing him very passionately. Jasper let the door swing shut, and looked at me.

"Your wish just got granted," I laughed.

"I think Emmett's okay," Jasper chortled. "It's getting dark. Want me to walk you home now?" I nodded, and I followed him out of the house.

"Is Charlie going to take Bella back here often?" I asked. I couldn't bear the thought of her leaving me; she was like my best friend.

"I don't know," Jasper frowned, his beautiful forehead creasing up.

"I hope so," I whispered, pulling my cardigan around my shoulders and shivering at the cold. I pulled Jasper's hand into mine and then dropped it. "Your hands are freezing!" I complained. He laughed and pressed one of his hands to my face. I shrieked and backed away, and he followed, waving his hands around.

"No!" I protested as he grabbed me, pushing one of his hands onto my neck. I screamed again and then burst out laughing. "Stop it!" I giggled.

A woman from across the street glanced at us, and then looked away quickly. I made a face at her retreating back. Jasper chuckled.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered in my ear. "I'll love you forever Alice Brandon. Every single day of forever,"

"Stop sucking up," I giggled, but each word he spoke warmed every corner of my heart.

"I mean it," he laughed. "Even when you wake up in the morning and your hair is everywhere, and you've forgotten to take your make up off, so it's all down your face, you're still the most beautiful thing in the world." I turned around in his arms to give him a fully fledged pout. But his face softened my mood, and I found myself standing on tiptoes to touch his beautiful lips to mine.

"When you're gone, you'll write letters won't you?" I whispered.

"As often as I can," he breathed, leaning in to kiss me again.

"Come back for me," I murmured against his skin. "Make sure you don't get hurt…" I gulped at the thought of anything happening to him.

"I'll come back. Then we can be with each other, all our lives," he kissed me again, drawing circles on my back.

"I'll miss you, more than before I think," I whimpered.

"Why more than before?" he asked, curious.

"Because we've had this time together," I murmured. "It's like a drug to me."  
"I'll still be here for another five weeks," he said gently. "Five weeks of being together,"  
"Then six months of being apart," I sighed.

"Twelve months until together forever," he chuckled.

"Don't let me go, Jasper Whitlock," I breathed. "Never forget me, whatever happens."  
"Nothing's going to happen Ali, trust me," he whispered. I hoped that was true.

**AN: That was another short one, and I'm sorry, but they're all going to be quite short and mostly fillers or fluff until my drama starts. That's in a couple of chapters maybe… I'm still planning out where to go with this story, listening to lots of music and the ending changes a lot. But it's safe to say that there won't be an ending for a looong time! Sorry, this one took what, four days for me to update, and it might be a bit random for the next five weeks. It's summer holidays now, so I'm going out a lot, plus my mum keeps telling me to get off the laptop because it's such a "nice" day and I shouldn't be inside. (Yeah right, nice days in England pfft). I bought some books for holiday today! Books are so expensive, I can never afford enough :( Anyways, hope you liked it and please review!! **


	18. School

**Disclaimer: I don't, in any way, own Twilight, or New Moon, or Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn. Geddit? **

School

I sat in Rosalie's car, Jasper next to me, holding my hand.

"I don't want to go," I whispered.

"You have to go back sometime," he said gently. "And you won't be in the same classes as you were last year; you had to be held back." I gulped. Even more reason to be a freak. I was all alone, I didn't even have Rosalie; she had dropped out to go to a fashion college and study theatrical make up and fashion journalism a few months ago.

"But I hate it here," I moaned. "Can't I just drop out like you and Rosalie did?"  
"Ali, you deserve to get the good grades, you're so clever," he smiled, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. I heard the bell ring, and hordes of students rushed past, some peering into the car and gaping at me.

"Well, I'd better go," I sighed, opening the door.

"I love you," Jasper called, blowing me a kiss.

"I can't believe you're making me do this," I growled, slamming the door and storming towards the school. I walked into reception, and Mrs Harrison smiled warmly at me.

"Hello Alice, dear," she simpered. I glared at her. She had never given me a second glance before. So people were going to treat me different because I had been kidnapped? "Here's your timetable," she said sweetly, handing over a piece of paper. "And of course you already know your way around." I rolled my eyes, not speaking. She knew I spoke now, but I wasn't going to give her the satisfaction.

I put my head down and walked to my first class, biting my lip. English. The first class I'd had with Jasper.

The empty halls reminded me of so much hurt, and I shivered. Jasper had told me he'd come and pick me up if anything happened, if anyone hurt me, but I was still scared. He wasn't here next to me holding my hand.

I took a deep breath and walked into my English class. Mrs Richards smiled at me when I entered. She smiled at me? Normally she would shout at me for being late.

"Take a seat next to Jessica, Alice," she said. I did as I was told, and glanced at the girl I had just sat next to. She narrowed her eyes at me. Oh crap. It was the girl from the airport, the one who had called me a slut.

"Okay, today we're going to start a new project," Mrs Richard's droned. "You'll pair up with the person next to you, and you're to produce a character study on each of the characters in Romeo and Juliet." My mouth fell open. I was going to have to be in a pair with _Jessica?_ "You will be expected to work on the project at your homes with your partner. Otherwise the work will not be completed in time, and you will fail. Understood?" Everybody nodded, and began to chat with their partners about what they were going to do in the project. I took a deep breath and turned to face Jessica.

"So… how are we going to do this?" I asked. She grinned evilly.

"Well, we could go to your house," she smiled. "Or we could go to Jasper's and do it there."  
"Erm, I'm not sure Jasper's mom will let err, strangers in her house," I muttered.

"I'm sure it will be fine; just say I'm your friend," she said sweetly.

"Or, we could just do it at mine," I growled. She was being way to obvious.

"Listen midget," she hissed in my face. "You might have Jasper now, but you can't keep him locked away for long. He's going to get bored of you, and then he'll be with me. We were meant to be together. You're a dirty slut. I bet that guy who took you raped you, and I bet you enjoyed it." My eyes filled with tears. How could she be so horrible?

The door opened, and a girl walked in, her hair falling over her face.

"Late again Angela?" Mrs Richards sighed. "Detention I'm afraid." She handed Angela a detention slip and she walked to the back of the classroom, her eyes red. Someone stuck their leg out on the way and she tripped.

"Neek," the boy laughed, and the boy next to him glared at him.

"Leave her alone," he hissed.

"And what if I don't? Gonna beat me up Cheney?" the boy chortled.

"Enough!" Mrs Richards thundered. "Silence in my class." The class fell quiet.

We spent the rest of the lesson annotating Shakespeare, and I was relieved when the bell clanged. Angela was tripped again on the way out, and her books fell to the floor, the boy who had defended her looked back, but was swept out with the crowd of students.

"Are you okay?" I asked, helping her gather up her books. She nodded.

"Thank you," she said nervously.

"I'm Alice Brandon, you're Angela right?" She nodded again.

"Everyone knows who you are," she whispered shyly. "Did you really get kidnapped?" I winced. "Sorry," she apologized. "I say things before I think them through."

"It's all right," I smiled. "It's nice to talk to someone,"

"What's with you and Jessica?" she asked as we walked out of class. "She looked like she was going to kill you."

"I think she fancies my boyfriend," I murmured.

"She came here about a month ago," Angela muttered darkly. "Of course, she immediately became friends with Lauren Mallory. They're so horrible. They push me a lot." She put her head down, and a tear dropped to the floor.

"Lauren used to push me too," I whispered, putting my arm around her.

"Ooooo lesbos!" someone laughed in front of me. My head shot up. Maria stood in front of me, her long dark hair falling down her back. Lucy and Nettie were still tailing her, smirking. Lauren and Jessica were watching from a distance, laughing.

"Go away Maria," I snapped.

"Found your voice have you slag?" she laughed.

"Just go and find someone who cares," I frowned. She narrowed her eyes at me, then drew her hand back and slapped me. I didn't wince. I'd had enough practise with James.

"Hey, leave them alone!" someone called, the Cheney boy had run towards us, and glared at Maria. "What have they done to you?"

"Ben…" Angela pleaded.

"They exist," Maria said simply. "Slutty Alice and Neeky Angela." She laughed cruelly. "Jessica told me she was raped when she was kidnapped. Jasper probably doesn't want her anymore. You're just a nuisance aren't you Alice? I heard he came back on a holiday, but he'll probably leave again as soon as possible."  
I screamed in fury and I lunged at her, punching every part of her I could reach. She grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled, it hurt like hell, but I pushed away the pain and continued to hit her.

A pair of strong arms pulled me away from her, but I struggled against them, and while I was getting the arms away from me, Maria punched me in the face. I yelled again, and lashed out at her. The arms pulled me away, and someone else pulled Maria away.

"Stupid bitch!" she yelled, spitting blood out of her mouth. I turned around to see who had pulled me from the fight and saw Ben, he looked at me pityingly.

"Alice Brandon, Maria Rogers, principal's office, NOW!" Mrs Richards yelled. I frowned.

Maria walked out of the principal's office, glaring at me as she walked past. The principal poked his head around the door.

"Miss Brandon, come in please," he growled. I sighed and lifted myself off the hard plastic chair. I walked inside his room and sat in a comfier chair than the last, but somehow it felt more ominous.

"Now, Alice, I know you've been through a hard time, but that is no excuse for fighting," he said slowly. I hated how everyone treated me so fragile now.

"I know sir," I replied.

"Maria told me you started it, is that true?"

"Yes, but…"  
"No buts Alice, if you started it, you started it. You're very lucky, because of your previous circumstances; I'm going to be lenient on you. If this were a normal situation, you'd face either temporary or permanent suspension. As it is, I'm going to let you off with two weeks of detention."  
"Two weeks?" I moaned. I'd rather be suspended; it would save me coming back.

"Two weeks," he confirmed. "And Alice," he added as I walked out of the room. "If you get in a fight again, I'm afraid you will be expelled."

I sighed as I left the dingy office. Well there was no way I was going back to class now. I pulled my cell out of my bag and stabbed in Jasper's number.

"Are you okay Ali?" he asked as soon as he picked up.

"I have a bit of a swollen lip, but that's it. Maria looked worse." I chuckled. There was silence.

"They beat you up?" he asked after a minute.

"Well…technically I beat Maria up," I said sheepishly.

"I'll come and pick you up," he sighed.

My heart leapt when I saw the red BMW arrive around the corner. It pulled up in front of me and I yanked the door open and got inside. Jasper put his head in his hands.

"What did you do Alice?" he moaned. I started to cry. "Hey, I didn't mean it, its okay," he said, putting his arm around me.

"She said… That James had raped me, and that you didn't want me… because… I'm a slut," I sobbed. He pulled me across the seat, and onto his lap.

"I'll always want you," he whispered in my ear. "Forever and ever,"

"Can we go home now?" I asked. He nodded, and I climbed back into my own seat.

"I want to go to fashion college with Rose," I said firmly. "I want to be a fashion designer."

"You sure?" Jasper asked. "You don't want to stay at school?" I shook my head. "Okay, but you have to ask your mom," he said quietly. I gulped. That was going to be a challenge and a half.

"You're doing what?" My mom asked, shocked.

"I'm dropping out and going to fashion college, to study fashion design," I explained again. Rosalie goes there, she loves it and I can't stay at school any longer. It's what I want to do anyway,"

"But you have to graduate honey," she pleaded.

"I can graduate from fashion college," I moaned. "They take early applicants, and I sent in some of my designs, and they're given me a place."  
"Fine," she shouted, "Fine! Throw your life away!" She stomped out of the room.

"See," I turned to Jasper. "It didn't go too badly," he raised his eyebrows and I sighed. It seemed no one was happy with my decision. I didn't care. I was finally getting out of school.

**AN: That was a little longer than the last chapter, but I really can't write lots of fluff or long filler chapters. The next chapter is going to be a lot longer… I think. Anyway, hope you like it. Can I just say thank you to TheRealSlytherinPrincess who read all my chapters, and reviewed every single one with really nice reviews :D Thanks also to june-bug1991 who left a lovely review xx Over 300 reviews, I'm shocked!!! I'm glad people are liking it!**


	19. You'll Never See Me Again

**Looking at you makes it harder  
But I know that you'll find another  
That doesn't always make you wanna cry  
It started with the perfect kiss then  
We could feel the poison set in  
"Perfect" couldn't keep this love alive  
You know that I love you so  
I love you e****nough to let you go  
I want you to know  
It doesn't matter where we take this road  
Someone's gotta go  
And I want you to know  
You couldn't have loved me better  
But I want you to move on  
So I'm already gone**

**Already Gone- Kelly Clarkson**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight… **

You'll never see me again. 

"Come and visit Emmett," I cried, as he gave me one his huge bear hugs.

"Every holiday," he laughed. "I have to come and see my third favourite girl,"

"I'm rapidly moving down the list," I giggled. He winked at me. "Couldn't you just stay?" I asked. Rosalie nodded in agreement.

"I have to be with Bella, this is going to be hard enough as it is," he sighed. "She can't be all alone in a strange place,"

"I guess," I sighed, giving him another hug.

He moved on to embrace Rosalie desperately, and they whispered in each other's ears, beautiful sweet goodbyes. Bella was throwing a huge strop a little way away from us. I ran forwards to hug her.

"Bye Bella, you're amazing," I whispered in her ear, squeezing her tight.

"I don't want to go!" Bella yelled, as the final pieces of furniture were loaded into the removal van. "I'm staying here!"  
"Bells," Charlie pleaded. Edward shuffled forwards, pulling Bella away from Charlie until they were next to me.

"Bella, you have to leave," he muttered.

"Why now?" she asked. "Just when we were boyfriend and girlfriend."

"Bella, it's time. You have to live in peace, go."

"Come with me," she whispered, in a broken voice.

"No, I can't go, and you can't stay, it's not the right place for you here Bella."

"Where you are is the right place for me,"

"I'm not a good boyfriend Bella,"

"You're being silly," she sounded desperate. "You're the best,"

"Biloxi isn't for you," he murmured.

"What happened with James, that was nothing, Edward! Nothing!"

"You're right, it happens all the time in big cities, people get taken. You have to move somewhere smaller,"

"But you promised! You promised we'd be together forever!"

"As long as it was good for you," He muttered. A tear fell down my cheek.

"But, I'm yours," she whimpered. He took a deep breath.

"Bella, I don't want you here in Biloxi with me," he choked out. Her face fell in, her perfect little features clouding over.

"You…don't…want…me?" her bottom lip was wobbling.

"No."

"Don't. Don't do this," she pleaded.

"You're not good for me Bella," He said. She dropped her head.

"I'll go, if that's what you want," she whispered.

He nodded. "Just don't do anything dangerous," She nodded. "Look after Charlie,"  
"I will," she sobbed.

"You'll never see me again," he whispered, kissing her on the forehead. She burst into tears and Charlie took her by the hand and led her to the car.

"Goodbye Bella," Edward breathed, so quiet that she couldn't hear. "I'll love you forever," Bella pressed her face up against the back window of the car, her face miserable. She gave a little wave, and then the car turned around the corner. Bella and Emmett were gone. I sobbed even more, and Edward burst into tears. Rosalie let out a strangled cry of sorrow.

"I had to," Edward cried. "She had to go, to be safe,"

"I know little buddy," Jasper said, scooping Edward into his arms. "You might see her again."

"I won't," he said decisively. "She won't want to see me, I hurt her too much," I stroked Edward's hair. He was acting way beyond a five year old. "I wouldn't let her have the plastic teapot when we played our game," he sobbed. "I thought she would spill it. But I was so mean. I was mean lots. And now I tell her I don't love her because she has to go, and not get kidnapped by the nasty man again. At our sleepover, she was crying in her sleep and telling the nasty man to leave her alone," Edward was utterly distraught, and he was sobbing uncontrollably.

"We'll all miss her Edward," I murmured. "She was one of a kind," The image of Bella's face pressed up against the glass tore my heart into pieces. But there wasn't anything I could do about it. The girl I had spent a year with was gone, forever.

I turned to face the other people who had come to say goodbye: Esme, Carlisle, my parents and Cynthia, Kate, Tanya and Irina. Kate ran forwards to hug me.

"I'll always remember her, how she got us through that awful place," she sobbed. I squeezed her, and rested my head on her shoulder.

"She was so cute, talking about Edward in her sleep," I sniffed. I let go of her, and turned around, falling into Jasper, so I could inhale his beautiful smell and calm myself down a little.

"Emmett… gone," Rosalie cried. I hugged her, and she pulled me to her, as if I was a comfort blanket. "I need him," she whispered. "How do you survive without Jazz?"  
"I don't," I whispered back, and she squeezed me tighter.

I looked over at Esme, who was holding a bawling Edward.

"It's okay Edward, you'll see her again someday; you were meant to be together," she soothed.

"But we're so different!" he screamed. "She'll forget me, and get a new boyfriend."

"Don't be silly Edward, Bella would never get a new boyfriend; she loves you too much,"

"She doesn't need to any more," Edward moaned, and slid out of his mother's hands. I wanted to be upset that Edward had just hurt my best friend, but I knew his reasons, and I couldn't be. He was like my brother, and I knew he had done the right thing.

There was another sob from Rosalie, and she fell to the floor, crumpling into a ball on the floor.

"Rose!" Esme yelled, running forwards.

"No!" Rosalie rasped. "No, leave me alone." Esme retreated, worry in her eyes. I took a few steps forwards cautiously and bent down the next to Rosalie. I stroked her blond curls.

"You'll have to get up some time Rosie," I whispered. "It hurts, but you have to bear it," Rosalie's face scrunched up in pain.

"I. Can't. Live. Without. Him," she growled.

"Rose, it could be worse. He could be hurt, or dead. You can still write him letters, talk to him on the phone, and once Bella's settled, he can come back,"

"I hate Bella," Rosalie whimpered. "She took away my boyfriend,"  
"Don't hate Bella," I said coldly, and then softened my tone. "It was Emmett's choice. He'll come back, soon."

"Going to give me a date?" she snapped.

"No, but he'll be missing you too. He'll come back soon enough." She looked up at me.

"Sorry, Alice," she whispered, and sat up to hug me. We stayed there for a couple of minutes, never letting go of each other. I helped her up, and she stumbled, but Carlisle caught her and supported her.

"What's happening here?" I murmured to myself. The world was spinning out of control, it seemed like no one could be together. My breathing got heavier as I realised that this was going to be the same for me and Jasper next week. I bit my lip and yet another tear fell from my eyes.

"Alice?" Jasper asked.

"Can we go and see Peter?" I asked quickly. He nodded, and we started to walk away from the goodbye scene.

"Going to tell me what this is about?" he questioned, about halfway there. I nodded.

"In a week, I'll be saying goodbye to you as well, it'll only be me and Rose left. Everyone's left. No one can be with the person they love." Jasper kissed my hair.

"We'll be together soon Alice, soon,"

"Soon," I breathed. "But like Rosalie said, soon can be any amount of time,"  
"Twelve months then," he laughed. "Or a year. Whichever you like best." I sighed. "Don't be sad, time will fly by."

"But every second that flies will hurt," I murmured.

"The hurt won't last for much longer," he said gently.

We came to the edge of the field and I sighed. It felt so good, so familiar. Even on a drizzly day, like it was, it was still breathtakingly beautiful. Peter trotted up to us, Vera and Seth peering over.

Jasper walked over to a little shed that stood on the outskirts of the field and unlocked it, emerging seconds later with a saddle and reins.

"You mean I needn't have ridden bare-back the first time?" I moaned. He chuckled.

"It's more fun bare-back, you get a real sense of it," he explained. "But if we sit on them bare-backed now, we're going to get a bit wet.

He strapped Peter in to the saddle, and gave me a leg up. He sat behind me again.

"Ready?" he asked. I nodded. And we were flying. And as we flew, the tears started to pour down my face. Jasper noticed.

"Alice?" he asked.

"Is this going to work Jazz?" I asked. "We're so far away, and I'll always love you, but it hurts, so bad. I'm not sure if I can cope."  
"Are you breaking up with me?" he croaked.

"No! Yes, No. I don't know. I'm just not sure if it will work,"  
"We'll make it work," he sounded like he was pleading.

"But I'm not sure Jasper," I sighed. "Doesn't that mean we're not ready? I've been through so much, and I can't go through more hurt,"  
"I'd never hurt you,"

"Not intentionally, I know," I smiled weakly, stroking his cheek. "But I have to think this over. We'll talk, soon." I slid off the horse, running for the gate, tears streaming down my face.

"Alice!" I heard him call over. I bit my lip to stop myself turning around and running back and apologizing, kissing his sweet lips. I just couldn't take it anymore, the goodbyes, the giving my whole life to Jasper when he was just going to leave me here. I wasn't sure how much more aloneness I could take.

**AN:  
I'm really sorry… But I think that's the last chapter before I go away. That might be it until two weeks. I was going to do it all yesterday, I was on a roll, and I typed about 1000 words of this in 10 minutes. Then came the writers block. So I went over what I'd done, proof read it, straightened my hair, went down to the shop and bought some chocolate, came home and then I went to the hairdressers, hung out with a five year old (he was nothing like Edward, he went on and on about Michael Jackson. Cute though, he's my hairdresser's son). Then my mum wouldn't let me back on my laptop. ****So… ****I was going to go back on it today, but I went shopping and got back and my Dad was fixing up my laptop so he could access his emails on holiday (yes, we're taking the laptop, but I have been banned from it for the entire holiday) and then I finally got on it and wrote the rest of the chapter. So, I think this is it for another two weeks. I'm going out with friends and packing tomorrow, so I doubt there will be time to write a chapter, I might get one in, maybe. If not, I'm taking a notebook on holiday with me, and I'll be writing up ideas and chapters in that, so I'll have something by the time I get back. God, this is a long author's note! I'm going to try and write a little now. I will TRY to write you another chapter. But for now, take it as there's going to be nothing for two weeks. **


	20. Game of Emotions

**I'm baaack!!! And I'm 15! FINALLY!**

**Over my shoulder, Running away, **

**Feels like I'm falling, Losing my day,**

**Cold and Dry, Cold and Dry,**

**Fog out my daylight, **

**Torture my night, **

**Feels like I'm falling, **

**Far out of sight, **

**Cold, Drunk, Tired, Lost. **

**Over my Shoulder-Mika**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight :( Life isn't fair!**

Game of Emotions

**Jasper POV**

I watched her walk away, my pulse quickening. Was she going to leave me? A tear slipped down my face.

"Alice!" I called out. She didn't turn around. She had looked so hurt, so broken. After all we'd been through, was it just going to end? The thought nearly killed me in itself. Life was nothing without Alice. Peter nudged my shoulder, almost as if he knew I was upset. I ran my fingers down his nose and he whinnied. My eyes flicked back to watch Alice again. Her short hair danced around her head in the wind, and I longed to run after her and bury my face in it.

"Come back," I croaked. "Don't leave!" But the wind carried my voice away, so it was impossible for her to hear. "Please," I whispered, not even trying to make her hear anymore. And slowly, and beautifully, she disappeared into the mist.

**Alice POV**

I sighed and fell back on my bed. It had almost been a week since I had left Jasper in the field. I felt so bad, but my feelings overwhelmed me. I didn't know longer I could wait before I lost myself. I knew that he left tomorrow, he was going again. Rosalie had told me that he was taking a plane to New York, before he caught the military plane out to Afghanistan. I had seen her two days ago. She wasn't happy that I'd left Jasper; in fact, we had a full blown argument about it. It had ended with me bursting into tears and Rosalie hugging me.

She'd told me that Jasper wasn't speaking to anyone, he wasn't eating properly. It hurt to think of him that wounded, but I just couldn't cope.

I could feel the tears pooling in my eyes. I knew I had to make a decision by tomorrow. Before it was too late.

I heard tiny pattering footsteps, and I sat up, wiping my eyes. Cynthia pushed the door open, grinning in her dressing gown.

"Hello Ali!" she cried, running towards the bed and clambering up into my lap. She smiled up at me, and I stroked her long dark hair. "Whassa matter?"

"Nothing," I said quickly, my voice cracking.

"Is it because Bella left?" she asked seriously. "I'm sad too. I'd only just made friends with her. Why did her daddy make her move?"

"It's too dangerous here for her," I replied. I felt so guilty, I'd barely thought about Bella in the last week, and when I did, I always felt awful for forgetting her. Jasper was taking up all my thought.

"Why is it too dangerous?" she pressed. I suddenly felt sick. I pushed Cynthia carefully off my lap and ran to the bathroom. I threw up in the toilet, and then sank down against it, leaning my head against the bath.

"Are you okay?" Cynthia asked, walking over to the toilet. She looked into it. "Eww sick," she exclaimed. I reached up to the flush and flushed the toilet. The sicky feeling had disappeared as quickly as it had come. The mention of James had just made me feel awful. I heaved myself up, yawning. I had been feeling tired for the past week, crying always did that to me. "Shall I get mommy?" Cynthia asked, concern in her eyes.

"No, I'm fine now, it was just a little bit of sick," I murmured. She seemed satisfied, and ran back to her room. She came skipping out again carrying something with a lot of blonde hair. I sighed.

"Let's play Barbie!" she grinned. She settled down on my carpet, looking expectantly at me. "I brought two," she cried, as if I really wanted her to get one for me, and brandished the Barbie at me.

"Hello, I'm Barbie," Cynthia trilled in a high voice.

"Hi, I'm, umm, Cynthia," I squeaked back. Cynthia glared at me.

"That's just silly," she growled.

"Why?" I asked. "You're pretty enough to be Barbie," This was a lie. Cynthia was prettier than Barbie. Cynthia didn't slap on two tons of make up and have a fake tan and she wasn't shiny and hard and plastic.

"But I have brown hair," she rolled her eyes as if it were obvious.

"So?" I asked.

"Well, Barbie doesn't have brown hair. She has pretty blonde hair," she stated.

"Your hair is prettier," I replied, pulling my hand through a couple of strands.

"No, it's brown," she frowned.

"Brown hair is even more beautiful than blonde," I said gently, hugging her.

"You still can't call the Barbie Cynthia!" she groaned. "Her name is Cherry,"

"Ok, Hi I'm Cherry," I giggled.

"Stop it Alice, you're ruining the game! Don't laugh!" she pouted. I couldn't help myself, I rolled back on the floor, giggling.

"For goodness sake," she huffed, and she sounded so much like Mom that I laughed more. She stormed out of the room in a strop. I stopped giggling and sat up. I started to sob. What was wrong with me? I didn't get why I just didn't call Jasper now, and beg him to come and see me. But something was stopping me. My body was rejecting the pain. I grabbed a tissue and dabbed my eyes with it, then I walked over to the mirror to redo my make up. When it was perfect, I sighed and left the room.

The sun was fading in the winter months, everybody was preparing for the rain that was sure to pour down over Mississippi until nobody even bothered to venture outside anymore. The park was full of people, enjoying the last of the sun. I found a spot of the grass, and sat down, using the raincoat that I now carried around with me as a seat. I lay back, letting the sun warm my skin, hoping that I would get a tan. I knew it was in vain. I had never got a tan in my life. I sometimes went red and peeling, but that was the closest I got.

"Er, hi," someone said from beside me. I sat up. A boy had sat next to me, he was staring. I glared back at him.

"Yes?" I asked pointedly. He had a babyish face and blonde hair, carefully gelled up in spikes.

"I'm Mike Newton," he smiled, holding out a hand. I didn't take it; I eyed it until it dropped to his side.

"Alice," I snapped, lying back on the ground and closing my eyes, smiling a little at the red warmth behind my eyelids.

"I'm new in Biloxi, I came here about two weeks ago. How come I haven't seen you in school?" he asked.

"I don't go to school anymore," I said, sitting up again, making the tone cold so he would stop talking and just go away.

"Oh," he said, surprised. "How old are you then?"  
"Seventeen," I replied. "But I'm starting fashion college in two weeks. I got accepted early,"

"Lucky you," he grinned.

"Alice!" someone called and my eyes scanned the park to who had said my name. Someone was walking towards me, their hand held over their eyes, the other hand waving. Her dark hair fell over her face and I smiled when I realised who it was.

"Hey Angela!" I grinned.

"You know Angela Weber?" Mike said darkly.

"Yes," I snapped. "You got a problem?" He bit his lip. Angela stopped when she got to us. She looked at Mike, hatred perfectly clear in her eyes.

"What are you doing here Mike?" she growled.

"I was talking to Alice," he said sharply.

"Harassing, more like," I muttered. He turned bright red.

"Shouldn't you be with Jessica, _your girlfriend,_" Angela emphasised the last two words, so that he stood up, glaring at her.

"Where I am is none of your business, Weber," he snapped.

"But it is mine, if you're intent on annoying me," I said, narrowing my eyes at him, and pulling Angela down to sit next to me. "Piss off Newton," He scowled and stomped off.

"Are you okay?" I asked her. She nodded and smiled.

"Happens all the time," she said simply.

"How's school?" Her features scrunched up.  
"Horrible, but, like I said, it happens so much I've got used to it,"

"Hey, what's your number?" I asked, pulling out my cell. "I've wanted to call you, but I didn't know what it was." She reeled her number off to me, and I did the same. She lay back on the grass next to me.

"So how come you stopped school?" she asked. "Maria said you were expelled!"

"I wasn't," I laughed. "I've decided to go to fashion college. They accepted me early, I just told Mike I'm going there in two weeks."

"He's a creepy pervert," Angela muttered darkly. "Jessica deserves him." I giggled. "He even came onto me once!" she shuddered. "Ew, it was disgusting. Like he wanted me for anything else apart from a shag. I mean," she looked down at herself. "Who would want me?"

"Angela, you're beautiful," I whispered. "Anyway, Ben Cheney fancies you, doesn't he?"

"No," she whispered, turning bright red.

"Well, he stands up for you all the time, and doesn't stop staring at you," I giggled. She bit her lip.

"But why would he want to go out with a tall freak like me," she sighed.

"Believe me, he fancies you," I assured her. She smiled at me.

"Do you think I should ask him out?" she whispered, as if she was scared someone would hear.  
"Definitely." She smiled.

"Ali?" someone said quietly from above us. I looked up. Jasper stood over me, Edward clinging onto his arm. They both looked utterly broken. I stood up, and Angela did the same, not sure who these people were. "Ali," Jasper said again, his voice pleading. I couldn't speak. All that left my mouth was a frightened squeak. I grabbed Angela's arm and ran. She was slower than I was, but Jasper didn't try to chase after us. I glanced back and all I saw was him standing there, Edward still holding his hand, his face distorted in pain. Once we were out of the park, I leant against the wall, panting. Angela did the same.

"Who-was-that?" she gasped.

"My boyfriend," I bit my lip. "That was Jasper."  
"Then why were we running away?" she asked, confused.

"I… I'm not sure whether to break up with him or not," I muttered. Angela put her arm around me.

"You'll make the right decision," she murmured. "He loves you, I could tell. You just have to decide whether you love him or not,"  
"I _do _love him," The tears had started to fall again and I wiped them away angrily. "That's the problem. I can't cope with him leaving all the time; I can't not have him here!"  
"But wouldn't it hurt more, if he was never here," Angela said. I looked into her eyes. "Could you forget and move on?" she asked me. I shook my head slowly. "You'll make the right decision," she said again. I looked at the sun, slowly drooping behind the clouds.

"I have to go," I sighed. There was no way I was staying out after dark, Jasperless. "I'll call you Angela!" I started to make my way home. I knew what Angela wanted me to do. I knew what my heart wanted me to do. I even knew what my head wanted to do. But my body wanted the opposite.

**AN: Woo I'm back!! Actually, I was back on Saturday, but it was at night, so I didn't have time to right anything. I wrote the JPOV on Sunday, a little bit of the APOV yesterday, but most of it today. I'll get the next chapter out before Friday. How's everyone's holiday's going?? I only have two weeks left :( **


	21. Decision

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, not poor little moi x**

Decision

I glanced at my watch and gasped. 3:30pm! Jasper's plane left at 7:00, and I knew he would be there at least three hours before. He needed to catch this plane. I looked at my watch again, biting at my fingernails. I looked at them and frowned. They were tattered stumps. I had never bitten my fingernails before. But I had been doing it a lot this past week.

I rocked backwards and forwards, unsure of what to do. I thought about what Angela said. _"I know you'll make the right decision." _But what _was_ the bloody right decision? I knew it, and I knew it would hurt. But I had to do it. I slid off the bed, and ran for the door.

"Where are you going?" My mom asked as I grabbed my coat.

"Airport. I'll be back soon!" I called, racing down the front path, and towards Beach Boulevard, where you could generally get a taxi.

I raced into the road, so that the taxi screeched to a halt and the driver swore at me. I edged around it and threw the back door open, throwing a handful of notes over the seat. I knew it was too much for the short journey, but I didn't care.

"Biloxi-Gulfport International Airport," I spat at the driver, who looked surprised, but started to drive. I fidgeted in my seat. I could _run_ faster than this. "Can you go a bit faster?" I asked.

"I'm at the limit," he replied. I sighed. Typical that I had to get the slowest taxi in Mississippi. But I couldn't help but smile. If I met Jasper in time, the sadness, the hurt would all be over, well, it would be soon. He would be back in another six months and we could have six weeks together before that final six months. Then we would be together. Forever. It sounded so cliché that I giggled. The taxi driver glanced back at me, freaked out by my change of mood. But I was going to see Jasper in less than fifteen minutes!

Finally we pulled up outside the airport and I squealed.

"Keep the change!" I yelled as I ran towards the doors. I glanced back and laughed when I saw the driver checking the notes.

The airport was packed, people in every direction. I glanced up at the departures board, looking for the New York plane. I found it quickly and ran over to the letter F, in search for Jasper.

"Jasper!" I screamed, running through the crowds of people and jumping over suitcases. I had a strong sense of déjà vu. "JASPER!" I yelled.

Then I saw them. A little family saying goodbye, right by baggage check in. "Jasper!" I cried again. His head snapped up, and his face broke into a smile. I ran towards him and jumped on him, wrapping my legs around his hips.

"I'm sorry," I sobbed, as he pushed back my hair from my face, out of my tears. "I love you, I could never live without you," His lips met mine and we kissed a long perfect kiss

"I love you too," he whispered.

"Forever," I promised.

"Ali, I have to go," he murmured against my skin.

"Not yet," I breathed, kissing his soft lips again.

"Alice, I'll miss my plane," he stroked my cheek.

"Don't." I pleaded. "Don't go,"

"I have to," he groaned. I slipped down from his waist and linked my hand in his.

"Promise me you'll come back to me,"

"I promise."

We walked over to passport control, his family following, their heads bowed. Jasper gave everyone hugs goodbye, and I couldn't take my eyes off of Edward. He looked like his whole world had fallen apart. Jasper gave me one last desperate kiss.

"I'll always love you Alice Brandon," he whispered in my ear. "No matter what happens,"

"I'll miss you," I whispered.

He showed his passport to the guard behind the glass and then walked forwards. My hand stayed attached to his, until it broke off, and I was reaching into mid-air.

"I love you," I called.

"You're everything to me Alice," he smiled, and then he was gone, disappearing into the crowds.

"Don't leave me," I whispered. Esme put my arm around my shoulder, and I realised I was hyperventilating.

"Alice," Rosalie came up behind me and put her hand on my shoulder. "It'll turn out okay,"

"I should have been with him this past week, I was stupid," I sobbed.

"You were stupid," Rosalie agreed. Esme glared at her. "But you were confused," she added. "You've gone through so much hurt," I collapsed into Rosalie's arms.

"I can't live without him, Rose," I whispered. "I just can't."

"I want Bella!" Edward cried and burst into tears. Carlisle picked him up. People were starting to stare. Edward and I were bawling and tears were slipping down Esme and Rosalie's cheeks. Even Carlisle looked like he was trying not to cry.

"Do you want to come back to ours Alice?" Esme asked. I nodded.

"I'll have to text my mom first," I sniffed, remembering my rush to get out of the house. I pulled out my cell and typed quickly, not wanting to stay here any longer. _Mom, I'm going to the Whitlock's house, see you later, Alice xx. _

Rosalie kept her arms around me, if she let go, I wasn't sure if I'd be able to walk on my own. She supported me until we got to Carlisle's Mercedes, and she slid me into the back seat.

Edward climbed in after me and snuggled against my side. "Bella," he sniffled. I put my arm around him.

"It's just not fair, is it Edward?" I breathed.

"Bella and Jasper," he said in reply. "Not fair,"

"I'll always be here," I assured him. "I won't ever leave,"

"Good," he sniffed, pressing closer to me. "Alice, the nasty man can't get Bella anymore, can he?"

"No," I said firmly. "He's never going to hurt her again,"  
"But he can still get you?" Edward asked.

"Maybe, but I'm being careful, and I'm always with someone,"

"But Emmett and Jasper have gone,"

"There are other people, James won't get me while there are other people around, and I'm sure. He likes people to feel alone. He only took Bella with me because she was easy to take, she's just a kid."

"She's the same age as me," he pouted. I ruffled his hair.

"Enjoy it while you can," I sighed. "Anyway, the police are after James, he won't be coming near Biloxi for a while,"

"He wouldn't dare," Rosalie spat. "If he came anywhere near you Alice I would kill him,"

"Me first," Edward growled.

"He doesn't know what he's getting himself into then," I giggled. Rosalie grinned, and then I remembered that I shouldn't be giggling at a time like this. Rosalie seemed to have the same thought, her smile faded. Esme turned around.

"Emmett and Jasper would have wanted you both to be happy," she said quietly. I wrapped my arms around myself. It was hard to be happy without Jasper. The last time I had felt proper joy when he wasn't there was when I was nine.

The Whitlock's house seemed empty without Jasper, just like it had in the few times I'd been there in between my escape and Jasper coming home.

"Do you want something to eat Alice?" Esme asked. I nodded, numb, and followed her to the kitchen. "I have brownies, cookies, chips, whatever you want," I smiled and took a cookie from a plate. My cell phone beeped and I wrenched it out of my pocket, still trying to keep hold of the enormous cookie.

_I love you. _It said simply. I didn't realise I was crying until Esme started making comforting noises and handing me Kleenex.

"Everything will be okay Alice," she soothed. "It may take a while, but eventually, it will be okay,"

Rosalie walked into the room, Edward draped over her arm. Carlisle followed them. He smiled at me weakly, before dropping his eyes to the table. My phone beeped again, and I jumped, pulling it out of my pocket quickly. I couldn't help but feel disappointed when I realised it wasn't Jasper.

_Hey, I'm at your house, but your mom said you were at Jasper's house. I need you here, now. Please Alice. It's important. I wouldn't be asking if it wasn't. Kate xx_

"I have to go," I said glancing at the text. What was wrong with her? Was she okay?

"I'll drive you back," Carlisle said, grabbing his keys off the counter.

"Bye Aliff!" Edward called through a mouthful of cookie.

Something was wrong. I could tell it was. Kate wouldn't just text me and tell me that she needs me with her. Something was very wrong.

Suddenly we were outside my house, although the journey didn't seem to have happened. I said my goodbyes to Carlisle swiftly and then ran to the door, and upon realising that I'd forgotten my key, banged it loudly.

My Dad opened the door and I rushed past him,

"She's in your room," he told me, and I ran upstairs.  
"What's the matter?" I practically yelled as I ran into the room. Kate was in tears, sitting on my bed, and she ran over to me and flung her arms around me.

"It-Its Irina," she gasped. "She-She's got a new boyfriend," I sighed.

"What's bad about that Katie?" I asked, hugging her. "It's good isn't it," She pulled back and looked me straight in the eyes.

"She told us she was bringing someone home for dinner, and we got excited. Tanya and I set up the table nicely; we cooked a really nice meal and everything. Hell, we even cleaned the whole house. For _him._ So Irina's car pulls up outside, and Tanya told me to get the door, she hadn't been expecting them so early and was still doing her make-up. So I opened the door and…" she trailed off.

"And?" I pushed.

"Irina's new boyfriend," Kate gulped. "It's Laurent," I felt the breath catch in my throat, and I took an involuntary step back.

"What…What happened?" I asked. "Did you tell her?"  
"Of course not!" she cried. "He knows where I live now, I don't want him murdering me in my bed. I took her into the other room, and told her to get him out. She wanted to know why, but I wouldn't tell her. So, we had a huge fight. She told me I was a selfish bitch, and I was just jealous, and then she told me to back off. And she said… she said Laurent was moving in."  
"What?" I gasped.

"Yeah," her head dropped so she was looking at the ground. "The problem is: I think he really loves her. He looked as surprised to see me as I was to see him. I don't want that ruined for her. So, I was wondering if I could stay here for a while, just until I find my own place. I know you're going through a lot at the moment…"

"Kate of course you can stay here," I interrupted, hugging her. "Of course, I'll have to check with my parents, but it should be fine."

"Thank you! Thanks so much Alice, you're the best. How did it go with Jasper?" she added quietly.

"We didn't break up," I smiled a little. She squealed and hugged me again.

"Thank god for that," she laughed. "You two splitting would be like hell freezing over,"

**AN**

**I told you I'd have it done by Friday!! No writing tomorrow, my whole family is meeting up, including my cousins that live in the US, and other cousins that live dotted all over Europe, which will be nice. Where has everyone gone? All my friends are on holiday, it's so boring! **

**Next chappie is going to be drama filled like a drama sandwich, so that will be out, maybe Monday… Not really sure, it will take a bit of time to write, might actually exceed 2000 words :O**

**Anyway, I was shocked to hear some people are back at school!!! Wow. **

**Please vote for me in the all human fanfiction awards! Go to…**

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**Sorry I had to reupload the chapter, got the link wrong because I was daydreaming when I wrote it down like the idiot I am :S**


	22. Caffiene Is Good For Shock?

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, or Coca Cola. Although there is a bottle of it in my bag (actually it's empty).**

Caffeine Is Good For Shock

"You're going, and that's final Alice," Kate growled. "Jasper wouldn't have wanted all of this… misery." I hated people talking about Jasper like he was dead. He wasn't. He was gone. Gone from me.

"I can't go,"

"Alice, this was your decision. Rosalie will be there, she'll look after you,"

"I don't want to be looked after!" I shouted. "I want Jasper!" Kate flopped back onto the couch she was sleeping on.

"You can't just put your life on hold while you wait for him," she narrowed her eyes at me. "I missed that part of my life, in case you don't remember, I was with James,"

I gasped; she had picked the way to hurt me most. I felt so bad that I hadn't told anyone about Kate before. I fell back onto my bed as well. "Sorry sweetie, that was a low blow," she murmured, getting up and putting her arm around me. "I know why you didn't, I was just glad you got out. But please Alice, just go to college. For me."  
"People will be horrible," I murmured.

"Like I said, Rosalie will look after you," she gave me a hug. "Do you want me to walk you there?" I nodded. "Go on then, get ready, you can't show up to your course in pyjamas." I grinned and padded to the bathroom, grabbing some clothes out of the closet to take with me.

I slid the cute vintage cami over my head, and paired it with some skinny Levi's. But when I got to the button, I realised it didn't do up. I pulled at it, but it wouldn't budge.

"Kate!" I called. "Get in here now," She rushed in and I burst into tears. "My-jeans-won't-do-up!" I moaned. She grabbed the flies, and tried to do them up herself, as if she was mistaken.

"Maybe you just grew out of them," she offered.

"I'm getting fat!" I wailed. "The stress is bloody making me fat!"  
"Stress can't make you put on weight," she retorted. "Only if you're eating lots. And unless you're eating when I'm not there, you don't eat that much. I grow out of skinny jeans all the time." She walked back to my room and threw a denim skirt at me. "Wear that instead." It slid up over my hips, but I had a feeling that was only because the waist was elasticated. I frowned, and quickly did my make-up.

"Done," I announced, leaving the bathroom. I ran my finger around the waistband of my skirt. It still felt tight.

"Finally," Kate joked. "Let's go,"

Rosalie met us at the gates, giving me a hug.

"Your class is at 10:00 right?" she asked. I nodded.  
"In room 34," I replied.

"I'll show you where it is,"

"See you later Katie," I called over my shoulder. She waved.

I started to fidget half way through the class. I was desperate for the loo. But I really didn't want to stop. In the end, it felt like I was going to pee myself, so I excused myself, and practically ran from the room to the ladies.

When I came out of the toilets, something caught my eye. The tampon machine stared ominously at me from the corner. My breath caught. I tried to calm myself down as I tried to remember my last period. The week before Jasper came.

EIGHT WEEKS? It had been eight weeks since my last period? How had I not noticed? I whimpered as I remembered that first time, the totally unexpected, unprotected, sex. I felt numb. I yanked my cell out of my bag, and dialled Rosalie's number.

"Rose, are you in class?" my voice was shaking.

"No, aren't you meant to be?"

"I need you in the ladies. Please." She seemed to notice my panic.

"I'm coming," she said swiftly before hanging up. I slid down the wall, clutching my phone to me. Eight weeks. I had been so caught up in Jasper that I just hadn't noticed. There was no way a period could be four weeks late could there? I thought of how I couldn't do up my jeans this morning. The sickness, the tiredness, the mood swings, all the peeing. I had all the symptoms of being pregnant.

"Alice?" Rosalie barged through the door, her long hair flying out behind her. I couldn't speak. "What's the matter? Did someone say something? What is it Alice?" I was silent for a minute, trying to get my voice back.

"I…I think I'm pregnant," I stammered.

"Woah," Rosalie's eyebrows looked like they were going to fly off her head they were so high. "I wasn't expecting that,"

"Neither was I," I was shocked. I didn't know whether to be devastated or happy.

"Right," she was suddenly business like. "We need to get you a pregnancy test first. We'll go to the chemist now. Unless you want to stay in class?" I shook my head. There was no way I was going to be able to listen with all these thoughts floating around my head.

Rosalie scanned the back of pregnancy tests, occasionally throwing them into the basket. There was a growing pile of tests. I just stood there, motionless. On the way to pay, she stopped at the drinks and grabbed four bottles of coke. I gave a questioning look.

"You're going to need to pee a lot to test all of these," she explained.

"Do we have to do all of them?" I asked, looking at the huge pile of rectangular boxes.

"You have to be sure,"

"Can't we just go to a doctor?"

"Yes, but do you want to go to a doctor and then not be pregnant?"  
"I'd rather do that than pee this much," I muttered, but Rosalie rolled her eyes, and started to queue.

Kate looked up, surprised, when we walked into the house together.

"Why are you back…" she cut off when Rosalie upturned the bag onto my bed and about a million pregnancy tests spilled out. "You're pregnant?" she asked.

"Maybe," I whispered.

"Alice, you're eight weeks late, you've got a little bump, you're peeing, being sick, being moody, giggly. You're probably pregnant," Rose said simply, handing me two pregnancy tests. "Pee on them together," she told me. "We can do two at a time,"  
"How do you _know_ so much about this?" I asked. She shrugged.  
"When Esme was pregnant with Edward, she took me with her to the shops with her, bought the tests, and then I had to hand them to her." She shuddered.

"Nice," I said, walking out of the room. It was easy to pee, from what I'd learned in health, the baby was pressing on my bladder, which meant I was going to need the toilet a lot. Unfortunately, I still wasn't able to pee ten times in five minutes.

"These two are positive," Kate called. Rose shoved another bottle of coke at me.

"I think we know I'm pregnant now," I was bouncing up and down. I normally stayed away from caffeine. This was why.

"Why the hell did you choose coke Rose?" Kate asked, peering at me through the gap in the bathroom door.

"I forgot about her caffeine issues," she said sheepishly.

"I don't think we need to try anymore," I groaned. Five pregnancy tests were already positive.

"These things don't always work," Rosalie smiled.

"Just because Esme is super paranoid, I'm not!" I swayed from side to side. "I AM PREGNANT!" I screamed the last part. Kate laughed and Rosalie just rolled her eyes.

"You are so lucky your parents are working, just three more, do them all together." I made to swallow more coke, but Kate barged into the room and took it from me.

"NO!" she yelled. "No more soda! I'll get you some water okay?" She grabbed a cup, and filled it with water. I downed it.

Eight pregnancy tests lay in front of us. Every single one was positive.

"What am I going to do?" I moaned.  
"Are you going to keep it?"

"Of course!" I snapped.

"I just mean…"  
"It's Jasper's baby, I'm keeping it."

"When are you going to tell Jasper?" Rosalie asked. Her eyes were huge and round, like the concept of this baby was exciting to her.

"I guess I'll have to write him a letter," I sighed. I didn't really want to text him the news. A letter was probably the best way of telling him.

"And you'll have to tell your parents, and my parents,"

"I know," I groaned, falling backwards so that I was staring at the ceiling. I was horrified by the fact that I was having a baby, _a baby_. I was seventeen! But it was the most wonderful thing in the world as well. Part of Jasper, a living part of Jasper was right here in this room with me. And that was the most special thing that could happen to me.

"I think we should make a doctor's appointment," Kate murmured. I sighed, and walked downstairs, flipping through the address book. I found my GPs number, and called it.

"They said I could go in straight away," I told them both once I had put the phone down.

"Do you want us to come with you?" They both asked simultaneously. I laughed, and nodded. The caffeine had worn off now; I wasn't ready to go anywhere.

"Yes, you're pregnant," Dr Reese smiled. "Congratulations. Now since you're so far along, I need to book you a pre-natal appointment as soon as possible, would Wednesday be okay?" I nodded. "Okay…" she tapped on her computer.

"Dr Whitlock has a slot, he'll perform the scans, check up on your baby,"

"NO!" we all shouted at the same time.

"Girls, just because Dr Whitlock is a man, he is still perfectly capable,"

"No, it's just, his son is the baby's father," I grimaced.  
"Ahh, um well…"

"He won't know will he?" I asked.

"The appointment is booked under Miss Brandon, Pre-natal scan," Dr Reese dropped her head.

"Crap," Rosalie said slowly. "He's going to be mad," I scrunched up my face as my cell started to ring.

"Thanks a lot," I groaned, checking the ID, and realising that, yes, it was Carlisle.

"Hello?" I answered tentatively.

"Is there something you need to tell me Alice?" he asked. "Because this is not the way to do it. And why did you leave it this late?"

"I only found out today." I whispered. "And I was planning on telling Jasper before anyone else,"

"I presume Rosalie is there with you," I cringed. Great, my plan had backfired on me.

"Yes…And Kate," I had a feeling it would be best to be honest.

"Okay Alice, it's all right, I knew Jasper wasn't sneaking away at night to play board games with you,"

"You knew?" I asked. I didn't even know he realised Jasper was sneaking out.

"Yep. But I do suggest you come over and tell Esme. Before she finds out."

"Okay," I dropped my head. Carlisle was like a father to me. There was a tone of disappointment in his voice.

"You should have worn protection," he added.

"It was… unexpected," my voice had been reduced to a whisper.

"Well Alice, see you later. And… congratulations," He hung up. I swore.

"He wants me to tell Esme," I told the others and I realised Dr Reese was going in.

"I think we should tell your parents first," Rosalie said. "Esme might call them all excited, and I don't think they'd be all to pleased to hear it from her."  
"I don't think they'd be too pleased to hear it from me either," I frowned. This was going to be the hardest part. Telling the parents. "I really wanted to tell Jazz first, but I guess that's out of the question now," I glanced at the doctor, who turned bright red.

I sat in the middle of Kate and Rosalie, I was squeezing their hands very hard, Rose was wincing. My parents sat opposite.

"Um, I have some," I said, wondering how to phrase it.

"Good news," Rosalie I added. I purposefully squeezed her hand harder.

"Ouch!" she exclaimed, pulling her hand away from me.

"I'm…pregnant," I said quickly and closed my eyes for the reaction.

"WHAT?" my dad thundered. I opened my eyes again, although I didn't really want to look. My dad was bright purple, and my mom was white, and very quiet. "YOU'RE WHAT?" My mom fainted. It took the attention away from me for a minute. Everyone crowded around her. I stayed on the couch, rigid as a board. When they were able to get her up again, she started to talk.  
"Why? Why, oh why oh why? Why us? What have we done?" she muttered.

"I can't believe this!" my dad yelled. "How many times have we drummed it into you that you have to be safe," I stood up at this.

"Never!" I yelled. "Never! You pretty much ignored me for the last six years because I wouldn't talk. I was your daughter! And you just forgot me; you didn't even like my sister being with me. Sure, I learnt it at school, but you never even cared. Well I'm not doing that with my child," I ran upstairs, pulling my suitcase out from under the bed. I started to pull clothes out from my wardrobe, throwing them in.

"Alice," Rosalie was leant against my door frame. "What are you doing? They're not kicking you out,"  
"I don't want to stay here," I sobbed. "Sure, they talk to me now_ I_ talk. But before, it was like I wasn't there. Like I wasn't a person anymore," And suddenly I was in Rosalie's lap and she was stroking my hair and I was crying out six years of pain on her.

"Any parent would react like that," she whispered. "Your dad was just angry; my Dad would be if I was pregnant. You're his little girl, he has to protect you,"  
"But he doesn't have any rights to," I cried. "He hasn't treated me like his little girl, I wasn't looked after,"

"He loves you Ali," she said softly, "That's why he blew up like that,"

"The thing is, Jazz should be here, he should be holding my hand while I tell my parents, coming with me to the pre-natal scan."  
"He'll be here for her birth," Rosalie smiled. "They get paternity leave," I grinned. The thought of Jasper being with me for something warmed my heart.

"So, do you think it's a him, or a her?" she asked.

"I don't know," I laughed.

"Any names?" she asked.

"I could call it Rosalie," I grinned. "If it was a girl,"

"Don't call it Rosalie," she pleaded. "I was cursed with a stupid old fashioned name. Do not call it Rosalie." I giggled. "Plus, it would get really confusing," she added.

"Maybe… Thomas if it was a boy," I stroked the teensy bulge of stomach.

"I like Thomas,"

"But it might change when I see him or her," I said.

"I bet he or she will be the most beautiful baby ever," Rosalie smiled.

**AND CUT!**

**Haha. A lot of you guessed she was pregnant :) It was pretty obvious. Wow, I did it in one day. I've been writing for like four hours straight. I got sucked in. It was more than 2000 words :O I've done so much research on pregnancy, and what symptoms you have at certain weeks blablabla, if my parents look at my laptop, they're going to think I'm pregnant! I got it out early, wooo I expected to be finished tomorrow, but I'm not!**

**Vote for me in the twilight all human fanfiction awards (and this time I'll get the link right):**

**www(dot)twilightallhumanawards(dot)webs(dot)com**

**THANKS!**


	23. Dials

**I find the map and draw a straight line  
Over rivers, farms, and state lines  
The distance from 'A' to where you'd be  
It's only finger-lengths that I see  
I touch the place where I'd find your face  
My finger in creases of distant dark places**

**I'm miles from where you are,  
I lay down on the cold ground  
I, I pray that something picks me up  
And sets me down in your warm arms **

**Set the Fire to the Third Bar by Snow Patrol and Martha Wainwright**

**Disclaimer: As always, I don't own Twilight!!**

Dials

I bit the end of my pen, staring at the blank page of paper. What was I going to write? How do you tell the person you love, that you are pregnant, in a letter? I slammed my hand down on the table. This wasn't working.

I lay on the floor and pushed my hand under my bed. I searched until I found the huge piece of folded paper and tugged. I spread the world map in front of me, easily locating Mississippi with my index finger. I drew an invisible straight line to Afghanistan. The line my letter would take. I had pleaded silently every night, to whoever would listen, that they kept my Jasper safe.

I groaned and folded the map, pushing it under the bed again, returning to my unwritten letter. I was going to visit Esme as soon as I had finished. Rosalie had left, telling me to come later, or Carlisle would blow his top. Kate had left me in my room to give me a little privacy.

_Hey Jazz, _I started.

_How are you? Are you okay? I miss you, so much. _I buried my head in my hands, keeping back the hot tears. There were no words I could use to indicate how much I missed Jasper. He was my everything. I slid to the floor again, pressing my face to the cool wooden floorboards.

"Where are you?" I whispered. He should be the one here with me, telling my parents with me, taking me to the doctors, dealing with his family. Instead it was his sister and a girl that he himself barely knew. He should be safe, and I should be in his arms. He should be here to wipe my tears when things got too hard, he should keep me safe when I was outside.

I sighed, and stood up. I would have to write the letter later when I got back from seeing Esme. The post wasn't picked up this time of day anyway.

I padded down the stairs and Kate looked up as soon as I entered the room.

"You finished?" she asked.

"Almost," I lied. She smiled at me. "I'm going to go and see Esme,"

"Want a lift?" she asked. I nodded.

Kate dropped me off right outside the house, and waited until Edward answered the door, gloomy faced as always, and let me in.

Esme blustered down the hallway, giving me a hug and scolding Edward for opening the door.

"I knew it was Alice!" he moaned, then returned back to his silent, sulking state.

"Edward, why don't you give Bella a call?" I asked. "She would be pleased to here from you,"  
"No," he pouted. "She doesn't like me anymore. I was mean,"

Carlisle walked into the hall, raising his eyebrows at me.

"How are you Alice?" he asked formally. I narrowed my eyes at him. He was making this obvious already.

"Good thank you," I replied sweetly. Esme looked between the two of us in confusion. Rosalie bounded down the stairs.

"Hey Alice!" she grinned, then sent a glare towards her father.

"Erm, can we go and sit in the living room or something?" I asked. I didn't really want to announce it to them in the hallway. We filed into the room, and I sat down on the couch, Edward snuggling in between me and Rosalie.

"Eww!" Rosalie exclaimed. "You got snot on my arm Edward," He just stuck his tongue out and snuggled into me more.

"Er, I have something to say," I said quietly. I wasn't really sure how to conduct this. These weren't my parents. I didn't even know how to announce it to them!

"I'm pregnant," I blurted out. The room was silent for a second, and then Esme screamed.

"You're pregnant?" she shrieked. I winced, waiting for the scolding, but I felt warm arms around me, and a second later realised that Esme was hugging me. "Aw sweetie, it's okay, I'm not mad," she said gently.

"You're not?" I asked. Then what was with all the screeching?

"I'm… shocked, but not mad. We know that you love Jasper more than anything. Sure we would have liked this… further in the future, but what's done is done." She turned to Carlisle and his perfectly serene expression.

"You knew!" she accused. She turned back to me. "You told him before me?" Her eyes were big, and I could swear I saw her bottom lip tremble.

"The doctor accidently booked Alice an appointment with me," Carlisle cut in smoothly. "I wish I hadn't found out. I almost had a heart attack,"

The phone started to ring, and Esme rushed to answer it.

"Jazz?" she said, and I leapt from my chair. It was Jasper? Esme paused for a second. "Yep, she's right here." She smiled and passed the phone to me.

"Jasper?" I breathed.

"Alice!" I could almost hear him smiling. His voice sounded rougher, like he had a sore throat. "I tried to get you at your house; your mom answered and said you were at my house. How are you? I've missed you so much!"

"I've missed you too," I carefully dodged around his first question, and he picked it up quickly.  
"Alice, you're okay aren't you?" He sounded worried.

"Well…" I turned to see everyone staring. I frowned, side-stepped out of the room, "I'm well, but I've just had… a bit of a shock,"

"What? Everyone's okay aren't they?

"Everyone's fine," I assured him. "It's just…" I took a deep breath. "Jazz, I'm pregnant," I heard his intake of breath through the phone and I winced. There was silence.

"Jazz?" I asked. "I'm sorry. I should have made sure we were protected; I shouldn't have put you through a responsibility like this. I… You don't have to look after the baby. I have Rose, and Kate, and your parents, I'll be fine,"  
"Alice," he interrupted. "I'm thrilled that we're having a baby,"

"You are?" my voice had risen pitch, something I thought was impossible; I had an incredibly high voice.

"A little shocked, just like you, but I'm pleased that we already have a future,"

"We already had a future Jazz," I said gently. He ignored my comment.

"I'm just mad that I can't be here with you, helping you through this. I'll take paternity leave of course; I'll be around to help you through the birth, if it comes near its due date. When is the date by the way?"

"6th August," I said proudly. I already had the date memorised in my mind.

"I'll be over on the third," he said quickly.

"And you'll be back before that?" I checked.

"Yeah, the dates the 17th June,"

"I'll write it in my diary," I smiled.

"So, how's Biloxi ma'am?" He enhanced his southern drawl just to please me. I giggled.

"Same as always. It's no good without you," I sighed. "How is it out there? Is it bad?"

"Alice, no offence, but can we… not talk about it. I don't want to think about it for the little time I get to talk to you,"

"I miss you," I said in a tiny voice.

"Miss you too. I love you more than anything." I closed my eyes, pretending that Jasper was right in front of me saying that.

The door opened and Edward ran out into the hall.

"My turn!" he moaned. I smiled and handed him the phone. "Jaasspeerr! I miss Bella!" he wailed into it. I listened to Edward's side of the conversation, hoping that I could guess what Jasper was saying. "No. Alice tried to make me earlier. It's silly. Uh-huh. How are you? Rosalie is being mean. She said I got snot on her new top. I didn't. I don't even have a cold! I know Rosalie is always mean, but she got even meaner since… Emmett left. No. No. Maybe." At this point he started to nod.

"He can't see you Edward," I whispered.

"ALICE SAYS YOU CAN'T SEE ME!" Edward shouted into the mouthpiece.

"He can't see you better if you shout," I giggled. Edward pouted.

"All right honey, give me the phone now," Esme laughed. I hadn't heard her come into the hall. "Hey sweetheart. We're missing you. She's just upset Jasper, we all are. I know it's no excuse for her being nasty to Eddie,"

"EDWARD," Edward shouted.

"But you can't blame her," she continued. "You were in a foul mood too, when Alice wasn't here. I know. Yeah. I'll make sure. How are you sweetie?"

I walked back into the living room, tired of listening to one side of the conversation. Rosalie looked at me.

"He is okay, right?" she asked.

"I think so," I said in a small voice. "I hope so," She walked off to go and talk to Jasper herself. Edward and Esme came back into the room, Edward cuddling up to me again. Carlisle followed Rosalie out into the hall.

"Any names yet?" Esme asked.

"I had some ideas, but I'm not really sure. I don't think you can call a human being something until you see it," I sighed.

"Guess not," she smiled. We were all quiet for a few minutes until Carlisle came back into the room.

"He wants to speak to you again," he said quietly. I almost lunged at the phone, I had to keep myself from clawing it out of his hands.

"Hi," I said into it, breathless. "Again,"

"Hey," he laughed. "I didn't get a chance to say goodbye,"  
"Guess not,"

"Goodbye. I'll love you forever. See you soon."  
"I'll love you past forever," I said gently.

"No such thing," he chuckled. "Bye, Alice." He hung up.

"Bye. I love you," I said quietly into the receiver.

***peeks around corner***

***dodges rotten tomatoes***

**Sorry!! It's been two weeks since I last updated!! And this is a crap chapter for something that I've had two weeks to work on. I've been really busy, then there's the whole going back to school thing which has totally worn me out. Who knew two days of school could be so tiring?? I was counting the chapters I needed to do, and I realised I needed about twenty more. Some will be fillers blablabla, but after baby comes (no, I'm not going to kill the baby, I'm not that mean!) there is going to be sooooo much drama. I need to figure out how I'm going to write the spark that sets all this drama off, I know what it's going to be, but I need to decide how it's going to happen! So, I'm going to make the whole pregnancy thing as short as I can, otherwise the story is going to go one forever!! I might only have about three or four more chapters where she's pregnant, and the fourth or fifth will be having baby. **

**You can suggest names if you want to, I think I've already got one, but I might change my mind… Not really sure. I think the name I've got is okay, but not brilliant. Maybe some of you will guess the name I've got!! **

**Anyway, sorry for the longness of the wait, and the short and badly written chapter!! Hopefully you'll forgive me!**

**Nat xx**


	24. When Will Perfect Come?

**So at the beginning of each chapter I'm going to put how pregnant she is, because it's going to skip time a lot! I'm as excited for the drama as you are!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, if I did, I would have a nicer car :D**

"**Everything's okay in the end, and if it's not okay, it's not the end, right?"-Helen. **

When Will Perfect Come?

**19 weeks pregnant**

The ultrasound technician spread the cold jelly across my stomach and I shivered.

"Are you ready to see your baby?" Rosalie whispered in my ear. I nodded. I was a little scared. What if something was wrong with him/her?

The transducer was rolled across my baby bump and I stared at the screen whilst she searched for my baby. I really needed to pee. They had made me drink tons of water to push my uterus up. That teamed with the fact that I pretty much needed to pee every hour these days was not comfortable.

"There's your baby," the doctor smiled and I gasped. Rose made a face, like she had been expecting something more, but I couldn't stop staring. That was my little girl or boy. And it was unexplainably beautiful to me. "There's its head," she pointed out. "And its hand is just there."

"It looks like its waving," I said quietly, and Rosalie smiled.

"My niece is already waving," she sighed happily, and I realised my first impression that Rose was unimpressed was a wrong one.

"Do you want to know the sex?" the doctor asked. I shook my head. I wanted it to be a surprise, something for Jasper and I to look forward to knowing. "You'll have to come back regularly I'm afraid, seeing as you're so young, just so we can check on the baby," She gave me a look that clearly said _slut_. I scowled. "Would you like a print out?" I nodded, staring back at the screen, speechless at my tiny blurry, albeit beautiful, baby.

She wiped the jelly off my stomach and I sat up. "I'm just going to take a blood test," she explained. "Then we'll just take a urine sample and then I have to check your baby's heartbeat, make sure its regular. After that you're free to go." I barely felt pain as she stuck the needle in my arm and drew out my blood. All I could think about was my baby. I _loved_ it. As much as I loved Jasper, although it was a different kind of love altogether, something I had never felt before.

"Whatever is best for you, I'll make sure you have it. I promise." I whispered to my bump (which was a lot bigger now), so quietly that no one could here me. "I love you little one."

I thought of my parents, how they had refused to come with me today, insisting they were busy. I was so angry at how they were just trying to pretend my baby wasn't real, like I was making it up. My hands clenched; fingernails digging into my palms. I would never ever do that to my child. I was going to be a better parent than they were to me.

"All finished," the doctor smiled once everything was over with. We'll send everything off for testing and you should expect your results within two weeks. I smiled at her. She seemed generally nice, even if she did think I was a slag. I guess I'd make the same assumption about someone if they got pregnant at seventeen and turned up at the prenatal scan with her friend, not the father.

I could feel the tears dripping down my cheeks as I clutched the tiny baby photo in my hands. I wished so much that Jasper could be with me, so he could see our tiny miracle.

"BONJOUR MA PETITE FILLES!" someone boomed as we stepped outside and both of our heads snapped up. Emmett was standing by Rosalie's car waving like a mad-man.

"Emmett!" Rose shrieked, running towards him and throwing her arms around his neck, kissing him passionately. People were staring and I giggled, running towards him. He stopped kissing Rosalie and turned to me.  
"Hey Alice!" he scooped me up into a big bear hug. "Knocked up are we, miss? What happened to all those Sex-Ed lessons?"

"They were wasted on me," I laughed and punched his arm lightly, although it wouldn't have hurt him if I punched hard.

"I missed you," Rosalie said in a voice I thought I would never hear her use. She kissed him again.

"Is Bella here?" I asked. Emmett looked at me sadly.

"No," he dropped his head. "Charlie wouldn't let her come with just me, and he wouldn't let me take his gun." He made a face at this part. But I could understand Charlie's reasoning. Emmett with a gun would be like handing a five year old a knife. "And she was scared to see Edward. She thinks he hates her."

"Edward thinks the same," I sighed. I wished Bella could have come with Emmett. I missed her so much, her little laugh, her warm chocolate eyes that invited everyone in, her sweet flowery smell.

"But _I'm_ here!" Emmett shouted, breaking the tension. "Isn't that enough for my first favourite and my not so favourite girl?"

"Emmett! I better be first!" I growled.

"Na, that's Rosalie," he stuck his tongue out at me. "But you can be tied second with Bells if not so favourite upsets you."  
"Can I be tied first?" I pouted and gave him my puppy dog eyes.  
"Nope," he gave me puppy eyes right back. "That title's reserved for my Rosie,"

"I should think so too," she laughed, pulling his face to hers. I tapped my foot whilst they kissed, feigning impatience. But really I was breaking apart inside. I wanted Jasper to be here, to be kissing me like that. The kiss broke apart and Emmett tugged on my face.

"Smile Alice!" he pleaded. My answering smile was more like a grimace, and Em mimicked it.

"You're so childish," I huffed, climbing over the seats into the back of the BMW.

"Don't pretend you don't love it," he chortled. "Rosalie does. See, this is why you would never be first. Plus you'll never be as beautiful as my Rosalie," I smacked him around the back of the head. Rosalie was visibly glowing.

"Right, it seems you don't have my home number Miss Alice," Emmett raised his eyebrows at me. "Seeing as you haven't called."  
"Err, no I don't," I said. Rosalie went red.

"I was going to call you, and tell you it, and then…maybe there was this offer for a spa day in my magazine, and I had to book it really quickly, and I just forgot to tell you," She dropped her head.  
"Don't worry, the spa made you look even more beautiful," Emmett joked, handing me a piece of paper over his shoulder.

"Is Bells home?" I asked. He shrugged.

"Probably," I dialled the number, excited.

"Hello?" A little sweet voice answered.

"Should you be answering the phone Miss Bella?" I scolded into the phone.

"Noo… Who is it? Is it mommy? Sorry mommy, Charlie was gardening and I had to answer the phone cos I couldn't get to him fast enough."

"It isn't mommy," I giggled. I could practically hear Bella's brow furrowing.

"Well who is it then? If you're the sales lady daddy says he's going to shoot you if you keep ringing. He isn't kidding, he has a gun. He takes the bullets out when I'm home cos it's dangerous,"

"You shouldn't be telling this stuff to strangers Bells," I sighed.

"So are you a stranger then?" she asked.

"You don't recognize me?" I put on a fake hurt voice.

"Is it Alice?" Bella gasped.

"Yep," I laughed.  
"ALICE!" she shrieked. "I missed you! Is Emmy there? Tell him I miss him already. And that Daddy's cooking is horrid. He set the microwave on fire and had to use the fire ex-tin-gis-er. It was all foamy and we had to get a new microwave. But don't tell Emmy, he's not meant to know,"  
"I'm zipping my lips,"

"Alice I miss you and Jasper so much! And Esme and Carlisle and Kate and Rosalie!" I noticed how she avoided Edward's name.

"How is Forks?" I asked. She sighed.

"Good," Then she perked up a little. "I made a new friend called Jacob. He likes to make mud pies with me. And we play lots of games together. He likes to be a werewolf,"

"A werewolf?" I asked. Who was this boy and why was he putting nightmares into Bella's head?

"Yep, but I like to be a vampire best. He said that's silly because vampires have fangs and hate garlic. But I _don't_ like garlic. It's icky!"

"Sounds fun."  
"When are you coming to visit Alice?" she moaned. "I miss seeing you,"  
"I'll try and get over as soon as I can," I sighed. I hated making Bella upset. But Forks was a long way away, and I would soon be getting more pregnant. "Maybe after I have my baby,"  
"You're having a baby?" she exclaimed. "That's so cool! Bring the baby with you!" I loved how Bella seemed to be more out of her shell in Forks. She was finally safe, and mostly happy. She had a good friend, and she was only five. She'd soon forget about Edward and Mississippi.

"I will," I laughed. "How's school going?"

"Okay. Eric nearly got a worm on me," she made a noise as if she was shuddering. "And we went on a school trip and he chased Lauren with seaweed. But that's okay cos I don't like Lauren much. And Eric is okay, but he follows me _everywhere_! I wish Jacob could go to my school, but he goes at La Push. Their school is even smaller than mine, and mine is tiny!"

"And how's Emmett's cooking?"

"Amazingly fantastic," Emmett shouted so that Bella could hear. She giggled.

"He's getting better," she allowed. "He remembers to stir the noodles, Charlie doesn't. We ate a big lump of noodle mess the other night!" Her voice suddenly went quiet. "Is _he _with you?" I knew who she was talking about, just from her tone of voice.

"No sweetie, he's at his house with Esme,"

"Does he still hate me?"  
"Bella, I think you've got the wrong idea,"

"How could I have done?" I heard muffled shouting and strained my ears to hear what Charlie was saying.

"Bella! Who are you on the phone too? How many times have I told you not to answer it?" There was a scuffling sound.

"Hello? Who is this?" he demanded.

"Charlie, it's okay, it's me, Alice," I soothed. I heard his breathing slow down a little.

"Alice," he said sternly. "How are you?"

"Um, good thanks," I said, wondering about the tone of his voice. "Charlie is everything okay?"

"Alice, why didn't you call, she's been so upset." He ranted. "Rosalie is calling Emmett all the time, so you could've got our number, but you didn't even bother. Bella has been missing you so much, and she found it hard the first couple of weeks. She wouldn't eat; she'd just sit by the phone crying. She'd sleep there and scream if I moved her. She said your name, and… that boy's name in her sleep. If it hadn't been for Jake, she'd still be like that,"  
"I'm so sorry Charlie!" I interrupted. "Rose didn't give me your number, she forgot and I've been so busy lately, lots has been going on, I didn't think to ask her, because I'd told her to tell me when she'd got it."

"Hmpf," he huffed. "Well, she got better. She has Jacob now, and she smiles, unlike the first few weeks. I sometimes think there could be something more between them, like her and Edward," It hurt that she was forgetting Edward, but I knew having Jacob there would be good for her.

"I'm glad she has him," I said quietly.

"Glad she has who?" Rosalie asked Emmett.

"Jacob probably," Emmett replied.  
"Who's Jacob?"  
"Bella's best friend, sorry Alice, you're second best with Bella too!"

"Shut up," I rolled my eyes.

"Excuse me!" Charlie exclaimed.  
"Oh, not you Charlie, Emmett. He was talking to me,"  
"I should hope so," He mumbled something that sounded like, "Teenagers these days, no respect." I smiled. Charlie would get over his anger with me soon. He loved me; I could wrap him around my little finger if I wanted to.

"I have to go Charlie," I said, as we pulled up outside the house. "Can I say goodbye to Bella?"

"Hello?" Bella chirped.

"I got to go Bells, Bye!"

"Bye Alice! I miss you,"  
"Miss you too," I said quietly, and I hung up. I could feel the tears cascading down my cheeks as Charlie's voice echoed around my head. _She wouldn't eat; she'd just sit by the phone crying. She'd sleep there and scream if I moved her. She said your name, and… that boy's name in her sleep._

"Why are our lives so difficult?" I muttered. Emmett helped me out of the car and hugged me.

"Because everything will turn out okay in the end," he murmured.

"Do you think? Everything's okay in the end, and if it's not okay, it's not the end, right?" He took a couple of seconds to decipher my babble, and smiled.

"Right. It will end, eventually. And then it will be perfect,"

"Perfect," I whispered. How I wanted that perfect, right now.

**I knooow! Like six days, maybe since I last updated! But I am SO tired, plus a couple of my friends are going through some s*** right now, so I've got to be there for them. The quote at the beginning was a comment in a conversation I had on Facebook with my friend Helen. As you can see, it was also used in the conversation with Emmett. I am Emmett in the conversation. Great :P I did have to take a ****couple of seconds to work out that Helen babble. I don't know if any of you understood it, it got easier to understand when I added grammar and punctuation into it (lol Helen). **

**Ugh do you know what annoys me?? When people are going: Oh yeah, this chapter was good, but it would have been better if I didn't have to wait. I mean, how can a chapter get worse by the more time it takes to come out?? Sorry to the people who wrote that kind of thing, but it just pisses me off. **

**This chapter is dedicated to Lucybee. I hope you get better sweetie, see you on Monday I hope!! And maybe Tuesday, if the singing people are nice! Get Nasha to look after you :) **


	25. Falling

**Disclaiimer: Stephenie Meyer is the owner of Twilight, lucky person, and Jasper belongs to her :( **

"**Why would anyone join the army anyway? They have to leave all their family and friends behind, and they get shot at!" Joanna Mason**

**Lol, sorry, another quote from a friend!! We were getting all annoyed because the army are coming to our school to do some crazy day where they shout at us and make us crawl along the floor. I've done it before!! They scare me :/**

Falling

**24 weeks (6 months)**

"Jasper, hurry up, I need to pee," I hissed to myself, jiggling up and down. I really needed to go to the toilet, but Jasper's flight was delayed and he could land any minute.

"Alice, go to the toilet, he won't be here for fifteen minutes after he lands anyway," Esme put her hand on my shoulder. "You don't want to have an accident in front of everyone do you?" I looked around at all the waiting people.

"Fine," I moaned, waddling towards the ladies. I hated that I couldn't run or walk anymore, I had to waddle. The bump stuck out unattractively, and I had realised I always looked ill. But I knew that it would be worth it in the end. The constant going to the toilet was annoying me too.

I was quick as I could be, making sure I was out again in three minutes. My heart sank when I realised the plane still hadn't landed. The baby kicked me- hard- as if it had felt my disappointment.

"Ouch. Please be more careful," I scolded it. It just kicked me again. "So you're going to be difficult huh?" I groaned. Rosalie grinned at me.

I stared at the ceiling. I hated having to wait for Jasper. I hadn't seen him for six months, and _then_ the plane was delayed. Luck was never on my side.

"Damn it Jasper, where the hell are you," Rosalie moaned.

"Be patient Rose," Carlisle raised his eyebrows, but I could tell he was trying not to laugh.

"I'm with her!" I offered, and baby kicked me again. "So is the little one,"

"When will Jasper be here?" Edward asked Esme. She giggled.

"I want to see Jasper!" Emmett cried, sounding more childish than Edward. Everyone laughed.

"Five against one, Dad," Rosalie laughed.

"Yeah, but my vote counts as six people," he chuckled. "So I won," Edward's face screwed up in concentration.

"How does that work?" He asked. "There's only one of you,"

"Daddy's cheating," Esme grinned.

"Fine, where is Jasper?" Carlisle laughed.

"_Flight NY506 is now landing_," a voice chimed over the intercom, as if answering his question. I could feel the smile light up my face.

"He's back," I sighed, my hand resting automatically over my bump. I could feel the déjà-vu rocketing through me, and I smiled. I wanted Jasper's visit to be better than last time, where I ignored him for that last week.

Ten minutes later, people started to filter through the gates. I screamed when I saw a familiar man in uniform, a rucksack slung over his shoulder.

"Jasper!" I yelled, and I saw the smile light up his face. I started to run towards him, but my foot caught on something hard. The floor came towards me at surprising speed, and I braced myself for the fall.

"Alice!" some screamed. It was then that I remembered my baby.

"Crap," I said quietly, I hit the floor, and it turned black.

**Jasper POV**

"Alice!" Rosalie screamed. I couldn't say anything. I just ran as fast as I can, although I knew I would never get there in time to catch her. I was right. She fell, hitting the floor, hard.

"Alice!" I yelled, crouching down beside her. "Alice, love, can you hear me?"

"I'll get the ambulance," Esme said quickly. Carlisle crouched down beside me, checking Alice over. People were crowding around us. I ran my hand over the bump protruding from Alice's stomach.

"Alice, come on," I whispered. "I need both of you to be okay,"

"Jasper," She didn't say it, but I could see her lips forming the words.

"Alice," I breathed, and her eyelids fluttered open.

"Jazz, our baby," her voice was an agonizing groan and it tore me into pieces. Was our baby going to live through this?

"She's not bleeding," Carlisle said quietly. "That's generally a good sign. But I don't know whether this has affected the baby or not. We'll need to get her to hospital as quickly as possible." My hand found Alice's and I squeezed it.

"Jazzy, I'm so sorry," she was crying, tears leaving mascara tracks down her face. "If I hadn't of rushed, my baby might be okay, and we would be happy and…"  
"Don't talk like that," I growled. "Our baby will be fine. You have to believe it Alice, without hope, she can't survive."  
"She?" Alice asked.

"I pictured a little girl," I smiled. "Your dark hair, and beautiful eyes,"

"I think I did too," she said quietly. "With your smile,"

"Not did," I scolded "She'll be okay. She has to be,"  
"What if she isn't," Alice whimpered. "What if… What if I killed her? Or hurt her? What do we do?" I didn't say anything; I just held her hand tighter. People were murmuring around us. Sirens blared in the distance. A man and a woman suddenly crouched down next to us, checking Alice over and talking to Carlisle. I didn't know what they were saying, it was all a blur.

"You're going to have to let go of her, so we can get her on the stretcher," the paramedic said sweetly. I released Alice's hand, reluctantly and she moaned.

"Don't leave me," her voice was barely more than a whisper.

"I'll be right with you," I told her.

"I think it may be better if her father or mother comes in the ambulance with us," the paramedic nodded at Carlisle and Esme.

"Oh, we're not her parents," Esme piped up.

"He's the father of my baby," Alice snapped in her croaky voice. "I haven't seen him for six months; he is coming with me,"

"Okay," the woman sighed, and her and the man lifted Alice, taking her to the ambulance. I followed, people staring.

"See you at the hospital," I murmured as I walked past them. I hadn't even said hi to them yet. But Alice and my little girl (or I guess, maybe boy) were my priority now. I was not going to leave their sides.

**Alice POV**

"Come here," Jasper sighed, and rolled on to the hospital bed next to me. He wrapped his arms around my waist, and entwined his feet with mine. "I'm so glad you're okay," he said quietly, kissing my neck. A tear ran down my face.

The baby was alive, and they couldn't see any obvious damage, but they had taken some tests and I had to wait a week for the results. I couldn't bear it if I had hurt my baby in anyway. I had broken my arm in the fall; it lay wrapped in a cast at my side. Jasper held the other one, and I lifted it to my mouth and kissed his hand gently. The doctor said I had been extremely lucky. I had fallen mostly on my side, and hadn't given the bump too big a knock. But I had to be very careful from now on. And there were still those test results.

"So, how did you fall?" he asked, carefully. "You just started to run, and tripped. You hardly ever trip,"

"I don't know," I bit my lip, and thought back. I just took a few steps, and suddenly I was falling forwards. But my foot had hit an object. And I could of sworn there was nothing in my way… "Jazz," I asked. "Did you see the thing I tripped over?"

"No," he said quietly. "You didn't trip over anything, I saw you fall, and looked, and there was nothing there." A face flashed into my mind, and I shivered.

"Did you see who I ran past?" He frowned.

"I wasn't paying attention really, I was only looking at you. Oh, someone caught my eye, he was looking at you, I guess he fancied you or something, and I was thinking _she's pregnant and shouting my name. _Maybe with a few swearwords chucked in," I felt him heat up, and I squeezed his hand.

"What did he look like?" My voice was barely there.

"Erm, he had light brown hair, pulled back in a ponytail, he was kind of rough looking, although quite skinny." I gasped.

"James," I whispered. He was still here. He was trying to hurt me. He was the one who had tripped me. "He…He tried to kill my baby," My hand wrapped around my stomach. He was never going to hurt her.

"Shit," Jasper cussed. "I should have realised. I should have seen him trip you and beaten the crap out of him,"

"Do not go near him," I warned. "It's hard enough having you in danger 24/7, you are not going to fight him,"  
"But…" he protested.

"No Jasper," I pleaded. "Do it for me,"  
"Fine," he sighed, and wrapped his arms around my waist, settling his hands on top of mine, on top of our baby,"

"What shall we call her?" I asked, changing the subject, even though I was scared out of my mind. "Or him?"  
"I don't know," he laughed. "I think we have to see him or her first,"

"Same," I sighed. "I can't find anything that would fit something I love so much,"

The door flew open, banging against the wall.

"Alice? Are you okay?" I sat up and Kate rushed towards me, wrapping her arms around me. I looked around her.

"Mom and Dad aren't here?" I asked. "Or even Cynthia?"

"They took Cynthia out to the park, and as soon as I got the call I came down here. I left them a note. They'll come Alice, they still love you," she brushed the stray strands of hair from my face. "What happened?"  
"I fell," I stammered.

"No, James tripped you," Jasper retorted. I glared at him. I didn't need Kate worrying about this now.

"James," she whimpered, sliding off the bed onto the floor. "Oh. Oh crap."

"Kate, it's okay, it's okay," I whispered, tugging her off the floor and back onto the bed. "We'll be okay," But I knew I couldn't promise that. James could easily hurt us both. Hell, he could kill us if he wanted to. A young guy walked into the room.

"Oh, are you okay?" he asked Kate, who was clearly hysterical. "It's okay, Doctor Rhys just told me I can discharge your friend," he smiled at me. "Your test results will be back in a week Miss Brandon,"

"I know," I sighed, hoping for the best. Kate was still hyperventilating.

"Two seconds," he said quickly, and ran out of the room. He returned literally seconds later with a paper bag. "Breathe in and out, slowly," he placed the bag to Kate's mouth and she panted into it.

"What's your name?" he asked her.

"Kate," she gasped between her breaths.

"I'm Garrett," he said gently. "Garrett Halsey, I'm an intern here. I need you to calm down Kate okay, or you could faint,"

"Fainting…might…be…good," she panted.

"Kate, it's okay, he's not here," I soothed, hugging her. She started to calm down.

"Okay, I'm fine now," she sighed, but her eyes were filled with tears of fear.

"Are you sure?" Garrett asked.

"I think so," she replied, shaking slightly.

"I brought you a wheelchair," he said to me. "If you want it,"

"I'll be okay," I replied. My hip was pretty bruised up, but I could walk.

"Hope you're okay then," he smiled, he had a nice smile, it was friendly and welcoming. Kate smiled too.

"Thanks," she said shyly. I waggled my eyebrows at her. "Let's go," she said, dragging me by the arm.

"Oww! It's broken!" I shrieked. Kate turned red.

"Sorry," she said. Jasper took my unbroken hand and we followed Kate who was hurrying out of the room, very fast.

"Jesus! Slow down! Pregnant, bruised, broken armed lady here!" I called. Garrett rushed out of the room behind us.

"Erm, Kate!" he called. She wheeled around. "Do you…Do you want to go out sometime?" She smiled and bit her lip, nodding silently. She walked back to us.

"Here's my number," she flashed him a grin and pulled a biro out of her pocket, scrawling her number on his hand.

"I'll call you," he said.

"Okay," she wouldn't stop smiling and they stared into each other's eyes.

"Let's go," I said exasperatedly, slipping my hand out of Jasper's and pulling Kate.

"Bye," she said quietly.

"Bye," he smiled.

"Oooo," I giggled once we were outside. "Someone has a little crush,"

"Shut up Alice," she groaned. "Is it really James?"

"I think so," I whispered, and Jasper pulled me closer to him protectively.

"I'll never let him hurt either of you," he growled. I span around to look him in the eyes.

"I know," I leant towards him, realising we hadn't kissed since before he left.

"I love you so much," he whispered into my ear. I giggled, then pressed my lips to his. That kiss felt amazing, like everything bad was forgotten, and everything good remembered.

"Hello?" Kate moaned. "I am here!"

"Sorry," I smiled.

"So, what are you doing about college?" Jasper asked. I bit my lip.

"I dropped out," I sighed.

"Alice!" he scolded. "Why?"

"You're not my dad Jasper," I snapped. "I got enough grief from him. I need to be at home if I want to look after the baby, seeing as you won't be here. People were staring and making comments anyway,"

"Okay," he sighed. "I'm sorry,"

"I'm sorry too," I sighed. "I love you,"

**Hmmm, not sure about that chapter. I am updating earlier now though!! Thanks for the reviews, Ohne dich ist alles doof (Without you, everything is stupid). I'm so depressing seriously, everything is going wrong!! I wasn't even planning for this to happen, and then I just pictured Alice falling and was like :O Hahaha I was so hyper last night, I was literally sitting in my chair giggling my head off, because my friend stopped talking to me on facebook (I think I was scaring her), and she was still on MSN and I was like "You can't get away from me that easy Mrs," And maybe this chapter kind of reflects that, so if some bits are crap it was because I was having trouble being coherent!! I think I was like to my friends Yegh I canh tope becaude Im soo kebed ui! OMG! PE is sooo dangerous. I got a bruise on my arm where a boy hit me with a badminton racket, and then I thought the volleyball would be a good pillow, and I was sitting on the stage and I didn't realise the stairs were behind me and umm I lay back and wacked my back on them, so I have a bruise on my back and my friend lovingly gave me her sore throat. The bruise on my arm looks so stupid too, it's a line! I feel kinda ill… Oh god, I'm going on about crap, I'm so hyper at the moment!! Sorrryy! Anyway, please review if you read this far without getting bored by my weirdness!!!**


	26. My Heart is Sealed in an Envelope

**Disclaimer: If I owned Twilight, I would probably have writing deadlines. Which would mean I have gone past the deadline. Sorry!**

My Heart Is Sealed In An Envelope

**25 weeks pregnant**

I rifled through the post, and gasped when I realised there was a letter addressed to me. I gasped, dropping the rest of the meaningless letters.

"Jasper!" I yelled, running up the stairs, and then swearing when I realised I shouldn't be calling Jasper, because he wasn't meant to be in the house. I heard the kitchen door creak open, and I pulled out my phone quickly.

"Err, come over please," I said into the silent phone. "Yeah, its here. See you in a minute," I cringed, and continued up the stairs.

"Jazz," I hissed, running into my room. "It's here!"

"Whaa? Alii, I'm sleein,"

"Wake up," I snapped, sitting on him.

"You're so small it doesn't hurt," he mumbled from under the covers. I sighed, picking up the glass of water on the bedside table. I pulled the duvet back quickly and chucked it over his head. He sat up spluttering.

"Alice!" he gasped. "It's cold!"

"Don't care." I said, narrowing my eyes at him. I wasn't in the mood for this now. "Look," I threw the envelope at him, and his eyes widened. He started to rip it open. "No!" I shrieked.

"Alice," he said calmly, but horror filled his eyes. "We have to open it sometime,"

"But what if it's not okay," I whispered fearfully. "What I hurt him or her,"

"We have to do this," he said firmly, and pulled the white piece of paper out of the ominous envelope. I watched as he scanned the paper, his brow furrowed, hands clenched so tight the sheet of paper was crumpling. Then, in one moment, his hands relaxed, and he let the piece of paper fall to the floor.

I watched it descend, and then stared at his face. The corners of his mouth quirked up, and finally spread into the huge smile I'd been waiting for. I screamed.

"What are the results?" Kate asked, shoving her head through the door. She had refused to sleep in my room once she realised Jasper climbed through the window every night. She told my parents it was because of my snoring.

"She's okay," Jasper sighed, hugging me.

"She's okay," I sang.

"Thank god for that," Kate laughed. I screamed again.

"Let's go celebrate tonight," Jasper said, his grin plastered wide to his face.

"Can't," Kate did a little celebratory spin. "I have a date with Garrett,"

"Hey, you didn't tell me that!"

"You didn't ask," she grinned and danced out of the room.

"Doesn't tell me anything," I grumbled.  
"So what do you want to do?" Jasper asked. "We can get Emmett and Rose to come along too,"

"It's not like I can do much in this state," I raised my eyebrows and gestured down to my huge belly.

"We'll all go out for dinner," he grinned, and it had me melting inside.

"Just us?"  
"Just us," Thoughts sped through my mind and a million miles per hour, of soft candlelit dinners with my Jasper.

"I think you've forgotten something else that's happening today," he chuckled.

"I have?" I said, racking my brains and trying to think of the thing it was. "What's the date?"

"29th April," he grinned.

"29th?" I gasped. "It is? I'm eighteen!"

"Yep!" he laughed. "Happy Birthday!" he pulled me into his arms and planted a huge kiss on my lips.

"I didn't think," I whispered. Birthdays just didn't seem important anymore.

"So, mom said you could come round for lunch. We can go out this evening yeah?"

"Sounds good," I smiled.

"Your present is at home. I'll give it to you later yeah?" I nodded and ran my fingers along his cheekbones.

"This is the best present," I whispered running my hands through his short buzz of hair.

"Happy Birthday Ali!" Cynthia yelled, running into the room. Jasper and I jumped apart, especially as Jazz was only wearing a pair of jeans. But Cynthia ignored him and jumped on the bed. "Got you a present," She thrust a box at me, and I opened it, peeking inside. I pulled out a pair of Gucci heels and screamed.

"Thank you so much!" I shrieked, throwing my arms around her neck. Sure, they wouldn't fit me right now, not with my ugly swelled up feet, but I would be able to in three months. It annoyed me that I couldn't put on the beautiful shoes right now, but I couldn't do anything about it.

"There's more," she grinned, and I put my hand into the box again. I dragged it along the bottom until I felt a tiny amount of small material.

"Baby shoes!" I squealed, poking my fingers inside the tiny material shoes. Tears sprung to my eyes. I knew my parents had bought the present for Cynthia to give me, and it was nice to think that they were finally accepting my baby. "Thank you Cynthia," I gave her another hug, and Kate skipped into my room.

"Finally remembered it was your birthday then?" she giggled, handing me a package.

"I had to remind her," Jasper chuckled. I punched him lightly on the shoulder. I started to rip at the paper on Kate's present.

"Woah," I said gently, picking up the dress. It was perfect for the approaching summer, floaty and flowery, with a low neckline. "It's beautiful. Thank you!"

"It's okay," Kate laughed. "I know how much you love pretty clothes," My phone beeped, and I looked at it.

_Happy Birthday! Hope you have a lovely day with Jasper! Lots of love, Angela xx_ I grinned, but my grin got even wider, when the message disappeared and the words "_Bella calling" _popped up over it.  
"Hello lovely!" I yelled into the phone.

"Happy birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to Alice, Happy Birthday to you," three people chorused. "Happy Birthday Ali!" Bella added to the end.

"Who's with you?" I asked.

"Daddy and Jake," she said proudly. "Sorry about Jacob's bad singing. I made him practise, but he still sounds bad,"

"He can't help it, he's a werewolf, he can only howl," I giggled.

"Can vampires sing?" Bella asked.

"Beautifully," I replied.

"Hey, Bella, you weren't meant to tell her about our game," someone grumbled. Bella had obviously worked out how to use speaker phone.

"Shush Jacob," she hissed. "Alice is my best friend,"

"I thought I was your best friend," Jacob moaned.

"You have a tie," she snapped impatiently. "I'm giving you a joint present with Emmy, so he'll give it to you later!"

"Thank you, then," I grinned. "Even though I don't know what it is,"

"It's good," she assured me. "What are you doing today?"

"I'm going to go have lunch at Jasper's, with Emmett, Rosalie, Jazz obviously, Carlisle, Esme and…" I trailed off at the end of the sentence, but I knew that Bella knew who's name I was leaving out. "And then Jasper is taking me out tonight, because we just got the results that there's nothing wrong with my baby,"

"That's good!" Bella chirruped.

"Yep. I'm so glad, I was so worried. What are you doing today?"

"Dad and Billy are taking us fishing," she groaned. "Tell Emmett to come back home, so that I don't have to go out fishing all the time. I fell in last time." I laughed.

"Well that's just the usual for you Bell,"

"Jacob jumped in to try and save me, then we both realised that the boat wasn't very deep yet because we'd just started, and we could stand up," I giggled. "Oh, we're going now I think. See you soon Ali!"

"Bye!" I said, and then the ringtone buzzed in my ear.

"Are you ready to go?" Jasper asked. I nodded, blinking back my tears. He hugged me. "We'll go and see her when all this is over with," he said in my ear. "She can see the baby,"

"She'd like that," I sighed.

_____________________________________________________________________

"Alice!" Emmett yelled, running out of the door. "Happy Birthday!" He hit me on the back so hard I staggered forward a couple of steps. "Sorry," he grinned.

"Come and see your presents!" Edward called from the top of the steps.

"Okay," I smiled, grabbing him and holding him upside down so he giggled. "There's the laugh I've been looking for," I smiled. I put him down and Jasper took my hand. I walked through the front door and was met with thousands of streamers raining down on me.

"Happy Birthday!" Carlisle, Esme and Rosalie shouted. They were still trying to untangle leftover streamers from their fingers. They must have had about fifty in each hand, judging from the streamers covering my hair. I swept them off, and gave everyone a hug.

"Come and see your presents!" Edward shouted again, dragging me into the living room.

"This is from us," Carlisle and Esme smiled, pushing a small box towards me. I tugged the paper off, and gasped. An iPhone sat snugly in its plastic box, calling to me.

"You shouldn't have," I whispered, but I was already pulling it out of the box, thinking of my decrepit phone and my iPod that was so unreliable, sometimes it wouldn't even play music. I hadn't bothered to replace them; I spent all my allowance on clothes anyway. "It's so pretty," I whispered, turning it on and stroking the touch screen.

"Look at the music!" Edward smiled. I did as I was told, and found five songs there. Each was a composition by Edward. "That's not my present though," he said sternly.

"This is from me, Bella, and Rosalie," Emmett said, handing me a white envelope. I pulled a card out, it was homemade, and on the front was a picture of Bella and Emmett, and another one of Emmett and Rosalie. I saw Edward's face at the pictures of Bella, and Esme put her hand on his shoulder. Underneath, scrawled in felt tip, was HAPY BIRTDAY ALICE!

"Sorry, I should have supervised Bella with the spelling," Emmett laughed. I opened the card, and a voucher slipped out. I stared at it.

"Free driving lessons?" I asked.

"Yep," Emmett grinned. "It's about time you learned to drive. You'll have to wait until that bump goes though," I smiled.

"Thanks Em, thanks Rosalie!"

"Now mine and Edward's present," Jasper smiled, tugging me out of the room, Edward trailing behind me. "Close your eyes," he instructed, and I did as I was told. Jasper guided me along until the red sunlight I could see from behind my eyelids disappeared into black. Cold swept over me. I heard Jasper flick a light on.

"Okay, open your eyes," Edward cried. I opened them, and the two boys pulled a huge sheet of a massive object. I saw a flash of yellow, and then a car was revealed. But not just any car. A Porsche 911 Turbo.

"Oh. My. God," I gasped. "You got me a Porsche for my birthday!" I let out a little excited squeak, and ran towards the beautiful car. "I've wanted this car for ages!"  
"You didn't see this coming when you got the driving lessons?" Jasper laughed.

"No!" I squealed, getting into the car and switching the radio on, sweeping my hand across the smooth buttons. "Of course, you shouldn't have, how much did you pay for it?" I glared at him. "No, don't even tell me! But its soo pretty," I was waging war in my head whether I should let Jasper spend so much money or not. I mean, this wasn't a usual birthday present. But the car was beautiful, and I really could not have it taken away from me. "Thank you, thank you, thank you," I squealed, flinging my arms around Jasper's neck and kissing him.

"Eww," Edward complained, and he ran out of the room, switching the light off on his way out. We were plunged into blackness.

"Edward!" Jasper growled. I heard a little giggle from behind the door.

"Jazz?" I asked, feeling for his face. I couldn't help but feel vulnerable in the dark.

"Ouch," he complained. "You poked me in the eye!"

"Sorry," I wound my arms around his waist instead, and he pulled me close to him.

"Alice, we need to find the door okay? Don't let go of my hand," I walked close beside him, squeezing his hand so tight that I could feel him cringing. But the dark scared me, even though it never had before James had taken me. It reminded me of that dank, dark room. At least the first time, I had been allowed out of it.

"Got it!" Jasper cheered, switching on the light. The brightness made my eyes hurt, and I blinked. "EDWARD WHITLOCK I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!" he yelled. I heard a scream and someone ran up the stairs. "I'll get him later," he promised, kissing me again. "Are you okay?" I nodded silently. "It's all right Ali, I'm here," I snuggled into his chest.

The rest of lunch was spent with Jasper shouting at Edward, and a very funny lunch where both of them refused to talk to each other. The whole thing didn't finish until 5pm, and I was having so much fun I didn't want to leave, but I had to get ready for my dinner with Jasper.

"Kate!" I yelled. "I don't know what to wear!"

"How about this?" Kate said, pulling out a dress from the cupboard. I frowned. I had worn that one before. She saw my face and laughed. I desperately wanted to wear the dress she had given me as a present, but she had gotten it so I could wear it after I had the baby. I don't know why, I would only wear it once anyway. I stamped my foot in frustration. I hated being fat and ugly. I rifled through some more maternity dresses and screamed.

"What?" Kate asked, leaning towards the long T-shirts and leggings.

"I just found the perfect dress!" I squealed. "And _why_ were you thinking about t-shirts and leggings, to a posh restaurant?"

"Comfy?" she shrugged. I ignored her, shooing her out of the closet so I could change into it. I stripped down to my underwear and pulled the dress over my head. It was black and floaty, with flowers on it, not unlike the one Kate gave me, but more spring like instead of summery. It actually made my bump look attractive, like those women you see who look as if their whole purpose in life is to be pregnant, because it makes them look even prettier than when they aren't pregnant.

I stepped out of the closet and gave Kate a little twirl, and she gasped and gushed about how beautiful I looked. She carefully curled my hair for me, and then I helped her pick out an outfit for her date with Garrett. They were just going down to the beach, so we picked out a top and a skirt and left her hair down.

Garrett turned up first, and I waved Kate off like a proud parent watching her child drive away on her first date.

I walked back into my room and turned on some music as I waited for Jasper. I tapped my foot impatiently, and my baby kicked. At the same time, there was a knock on the door.

"Physic," I whispered, and skipped down the stairs.

"Good evening, ma'am," Jasper said sweetly, and I smiled. "Your ride awaits," I followed him my new car, and he opened the door. I stared at every detail, wishing I could drive it already. I wasn't going to risk it until I had passed my test.

I had never been in the restaurant before, but had always wanted to go. I had just never had the time, or anyone to go with. There was a queue, but Jasper had booked a table, so we skipped it and headed right towards our table.

"Alice?" some said behind me. I spun around.

"Angela!" I said, pleased I was seeing everyone on my birthday. I hugged her. "What are you doing here?"

"Ben took me," she smiled, and I saw little Ben Cheney in the corner, peeking his head round to see who his girlfriend was talking to.

"You asked him out then?" I whispered, giving him a little wave.

"No, he asked me, just before I was about to ask!" she squealed, as quietly as possible. "He gave me roses and everything. And he's been saving up to take me here."

"I'm so pleased for you!" I grinned, and hugged her again.

"Happy Birthday by the way. Sorry I didn't get you a present," she looked really guilty.

"It's okay!" I smiled. "Seeing you is a present in itself!"

"I hope you have a nice night!" she said, kind as always, and she returned to her seat.

_____________________________________________________________________

"That was so good!" I exclaimed. I had just finished a slice of chocolate gateau, and I was completely stuffed. "I'm so glad we came! And I'm so glad my little girl or boy is okay," I rested my hand on my stomach.

"Actually, Alice, there was another reason for us coming here," Jasper said shyly.

"There was?" I asked. He got down on one knee and I gasped. I heard Angela scream from across the room. Everyone had gone silent.

"Alice Brandon, I promise to love you, forever. Whatever happens. Will you marry me?"

"I…I…" I was speechless. I felt like fainting right now. Everybody was staring at us.

"Say yes!" Angela mouthed to me. She was standing on her chair now to see what happened.

"Yes!" I shrieked, wrapping my arms around his neck and planting a kiss to his lips.

**A/N:**

**I'm soooooooooo sorry it took so long! But 2970 something words is good right? And that doesn't include the A/N :) I've been soo busy the last week, and have literally had no time to update my Facebook status, let alone write. Plus I had terrible writers block, because I had this idea, then I forgot it, and I was trying to remember it for days. I mean, who forgets they were meant to get engaged?? Me obviously. I have used eight pounds credit on my phone in one week. I have no credit left and I am like sooo annoyed, because I don't even know where it all went. Okay, so my text memory keeps getting to the top, but I never really think about the credit I'm using!! And I have no money because I bought new shoes on Saturday, and my mum won't top up my phone until November, so I'm stuffed. And my earphones don't work, they have to be in a certain position and I need some chocolate soon, I'm having withdrawals because I have no money to buy it!! Hahaha my little rants :P **

**I have so much school work to do, I hate it!! Hopefully there's going to be an update in the next couple of weeks, but I'm so sorry if there's not. I'm not that busy this week, I'm busy tomorrow, but that's about it really :) Again, soo sorry! **


	27. Frozen

**Disclaimer: If I owned Twilight, I'd be rich with lots of fans. I'm not, okay?**

**I feel the beating of your heart  
I see the shadows of your face  
Just know that wherever you are  
Yeah, I miss you  
And I wish you were here**

I miss the years that were erased  
I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face  
I miss all the little things  
I never thought that they**'d mean everything to me  
Yeah, I miss you  
And I wish you were here**

So far away from where you are  
These miles have torn us worlds apart  
And I miss you  
Yeah, I miss you  
And I wish you were here

**From Where You Are-Lifehouse**

Frozen

I glanced at the sun, high in the sky, and watched the children dance around, the yellow light illuminating their happy faces. My hand stroked the huge curve of my stomach as I imagined my little baby, running around just like that, playing with friends. It stung that once I had gotten out of my prison the first time, I didn't have a childhood anymore. I was forgotten, something that was there, but no one wanted, like graffiti scrawled on a wall. I clenched my fists, my nails digging into my palms.

Jasper had left again two weeks ago. I knew it wouldn't be long until I saw him again, he still had thirty days of leave, as well as ten days paternity leave, so he was taking fifteen days off before the pregnancy, and fifteen after. He would be here again in a month.

I watched as Edward soared upwards on the swing, his face stony. He was never happy any more. I wondered if I would be like that if I lost Jasper forever. I shuddered, and I knew why. If Jasper was gone, I would cease to be. I would end my life. I was nothing without him. Edward's legs kicked upwards, and he let go of the swing, flying forwards. I swore under my breath, and ran forwards, as Edward hit the ground with a smack and started to scream. Several concerned parents ran over to him, but he screamed harder whenever they touched him. I reached him, and pulled him into my arms, cradling him into my chest. The adults looked me up and down, tutting at my huge belly. I frowned. They obviously thought I was Edward's mom as well.

"Its okay sweetie," I whispered in Edwards's ear, checking him over carefully. The damage wasn't bad, just scraped up hands and knees. "Have you got any band aids?" I asked a woman near, who had hung around to check Edward was okay. She smiled and nodded, digging into her handbag and pulling out a little cardboard box. "Thanks," I grinned, and delved into the cardboard, pulling out four band aids. I stuck them over Edwards's knees and hands. "There you go, all better," I said lightly, knowing that he would cry more if I made a big deal about it.

I handed the box back to the woman and she smiled. Edward was still sniffling, and I handed him a Kleenex.

"I should have thought about some first aid," I grimaced. "I still have to get used to this,"

"How old is he?" the woman asked.

"Five," I replied.

"Six next month," Edward sniffed. A little red headed girl bounced over, her curls jiggling with her. She grinned at Edward, and he pouted back.

"This is Maggie," the woman smiled. I liked her. "I'm Siobhan,"

"I'm Alice. And this is Edward," he snuggled into my side.

"He's very attached to you," Siobhan noted. "I wish I could get mine to do the same, Maggie's always running off and doing her own thing,"

"Oh, he's not mine," I said quickly.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" she gasped. I just assumed, he seems so close to you. I smiled; somehow I wasn't offended by her assumption.

"It's okay," I grinned. "He's my fiancé's brother,"

"Oh, you're getting married," her face went dreamy. "That's nice,"

"Yeah, I'm really excited, Jasper was beginning to regret proposing once he found out what I was like the next day," I grinned at the memory of me skipping everywhere the next day, completely hyped up.

"You must love him a lot," she said. I nodded.

"I miss Jazz," Edward moaned. She looked at me quizzically and I sighed.

"He's a soldier in Afghanistan," I explained. "He'll be back in a month Edward,"

"That must be horrible," Siobhan said gently. I nodded, keeping back the tears.

"Alice?" someone said behind me, and I turned around. Irina smiled at me and waved gently. My eyes dropped to her other hand, which was curled around an olive skinned one. I took an involuntary step back as I met his eyes. Laurent. "How are you?" she asked. "How's Kate? I miss her,"

"I…I…" I breathed deeply, trying to form a coherent sentence. "She's okay. She's sleeping on the couch at mine,"

"Do you know why she won't come back?" she asked. I wasn't going to tell her, I couldn't. Laurent was staring at me in horror.  
"N…No," I whispered hoarsely.

"Are you okay Alice," Siobhan hissed behind me. "Are they causing trouble," I turned and put Edward down on the ground in front of her.

"Could you look after Edward for me?" I asked, and looked at Edward. "Go on, go play with Maggie,"  
"Want to go on the climbing frame with me?" the bubbly girl asked, and Edward nodded slowly. I turned back to Irina.

"Can I talk to you Alice?" Laurent asked. I froze. Sure, he had helped us out of that place, but he sure scared the hell out of me.

"What is it?" Irina asked him quietly, and he turned to look at her. I analysed his expression, and thought that it was definitely love etched into his features. But then again, he was a good actor. He murmured something in her ear, and she nodded.

"Just a quick word," he said gently to me. "Just by the tree over there," he pointed out a nearby spruce, families around it, eating picnics and chatting and I nodded. He couldn't do anything there, with that many people.

"What do you want?" I hissed, as soon as we were out of earshot.

"Alice…" he said slowly. "I know this is a really bad situation. But I love Irina. I didn't realise she was Kate's sister, I'm just trying to get a fresh start, okay? And… I know that Kate being away is hurting Irina. She didn't mean to say those things. So, please, get her to move back in. I don't even have to talk to her,"

"She's twenty-four, she's old enough to get her own place now, and do you think she wants to see her face every day?" I was trying so hard not to shout. "What with all the happy memories. She's so upset Laurent. And, I'm so glad you got us out, but I can't cope with seeing you." I started to walk away, but Laurent grabbed my arm. I wrenched it out of his grip. "Get. Off. Me." I hissed.

"Please Alice," his face was full of agonizing pain, like he really cared about Kate.

"If you want her back, ask _her, _not me," I growled. "I think it's better for her that she does get her own apartment, then Irina can see her, and you can't get involved."

"Alice, you won't tell Irina will you?" he asked, and his face looked broken at the thought of Irina finding out. I shook my head and walked off, over to the slide, which Maggie and Edward were laughing on.

"Hey Edward, ready to go?" He nodded, and jumped to the ground, his tear stained face the only indication that he had ever been injured. "Thanks Siobhan," I said, and I was really happy that I had met her.

"Do you want my number, and you can give it to Edward's mom," she offered. "We can arrange a play date. I think they get on well," I nodded in agreement, ruffling Edward's hair. She held out a card to me, and I waved goodbye, as Edward and I set off home.

Rosalie and Emmett had gone off on their last date, he was leaving again tomorrow, and I had offered to take Edward out, because Esme and Carlisle were both at work. I dug for the spare key under the plant pot and let myself in. The house was empty and silent. I sighed.

"Maggie was nice," Edward said quietly. "She said Bella probably didn't hate me, and that everything would be okay. I don't think she's right though."  
"Girls are always right," I laughed. "That's a lesson you have to learn Edward,"

"But they like pink!" he scrunched up his face and I giggled. "Can I have candy?" he asked me.

"I don't have any!"

"Mom has some in the cupboard," he ran into the kitchen.

"Edward… I'm not sure…" I wasn't sure if I was meant to give Edward was meant to have any or not, and whether the stuff in his cupboard was even his. He skipped back into the room with a bowl full to the brim with candy corn and a big bar of chocolate. "Woah, there is no way that you are having that much candy corn!" I exclaimed. I couldn't even stomach that much, and I could eat a lot.

"But I always have this much!" he frowned.

"No Edward, that has so much sugar in it! You'll go crazy,"

"I won't!" he protested.

"No," I narrowed my eyes, and pulled the bowl away from him.

"Fine," he said, and stomped out of the room. I waited until I heard him go up the stairs, just so I knew he wasn't going into the kitchen, and I turned on the TV.

***

Half an hour later, things were strangely quiet. I tiptoed upstairs.

"Edward?" I asked, poking my head around the door. Hundreds of sweet wrappers were strewn around Edward's feet, and he was bouncing up and down a little.

"Aw crap," I moaned. I should have known Edward had the whole stock of a sweet shop in his room. He giggled a little.

"You said a bad word!" he said, his words merging together.

"This is why I wouldn't let you have the candy. Edward, that was really bad," I scolded.

"Baaad," he laughed. I put my head in my hands. He was not going to take anything seriously now. "Can we play a game Ali?" he started hopping on the spot. He was as bad as me when affected by sugar.

"No Edward, you can't have anything fun, you've been naughty," I chastised. I was fighting the urge not to giggle, but I knew I couldn't do that, Edward would find it even more funny. "You're going to go to your room and stay there,"

"No, no, no, no!" he chanted. I groaned. Someone rang the doorbell.

"Emmett and Rosiee!" he sang, running out of the room. I followed him quickly, so I could get to the door first. I yanked it open and Emmett and Rose looked at me, obviously noting my flustered expression.

"Rosalie, why the HELL does Esme let Edward keep sweets in his room?" I whined.

"That's where the sweets in the treat cupboard were going," she mused. "I thought Em was eating them,"

"Hey!" Emmett said. "It's not even my house,"

Edward broke up the conversation by vomiting a huge multi-coloured rainbow onto Rosalie's new shoes. She screamed.

"What's going on?" Esme asked, getting out of her car.

***

We managed to calm Edward down, and Esme sent him to his room, after checking thoroughly that there were no sweets left.

"He's worse than you on caffeine," Rosalie grumbled, mourning her ruined shoes.

"That's why I only give him candy as a treat," Esme said, and it was obvious she was trying not to laugh.

"It was a good leaving present," Emmett laughed. "Edward high on sugar was one of the funniest things I have ever seen,"

"You weren't the one who got thrown up on," Rosalie groaned. Emmett pulled her into a one armed hug, and she smiled a little.

"You handled it well though Alice," Esme smiled. "You'll be a good mother,"

"You think so?" I asked.

"I know so," she grinned.

**AN:  
So, I've had like three cups of tea, and two packs of fruity mentos, so sorry if it's a bit of a hyper AN again!! Ugh, I'm really sorry, but it is going to be long updates for a bit. I have sooo much work, and certain people *cough*Rosie*cough* keep talking to me on Facebook and distracting me :P So tonight I had absolutely no homework (shock horror) and I grabbed a cup of tea (followed by two more) and the fruity mentos that my friend got me from Barcelona (he got me a massive tube!) and started to write, with Pixie Lott and Paramore in the background on YouTube, then I moved on to the Twilight Soundtrack, because my internet randomly crashed and I couldn't be bothered to get it back up.**

**I was planning to write this yesterday, but then I realised how busy my evening was going to be! I went to the dentist straight after school (perfect teeth, no cavities!) and then came home, got dressed, and straightened my hair (I HATE humid weather, my hair frizzes up so much), had my dinner, all in half an hour, and then went to my singing lesson, and went straight from that to a sixth form college open evening, which looks amazing, but scared me a little! It was bigger than my school! Then I came home and did my homework, thought I'd lost my homework because I didn't save it because I thought I'd printed it, and then found it on the print list thingy. Oh god, I'm rambling again. **

**Haha, back to the story, it's a bit of a filler chapter, but I PROMISE next chapter will be veery drama-ry! **

**Does anyone do Media Studies at Sixth Form College, because it looks really good and I want to know what it's like! **

**Thank you to , for reminding me about Laurent and Irina. I had planned to do more about them, but I completely forgot about them ;) No thanks to Rosie, 'cause you buggered up my updating (blame her, not me) you annoying thing. LY really :) **

**Haahaa I told you I was hyper. Sorry about my ramblingness, I'm so annoying! **

**BELLA'S LULLABY! **

***awkward laugh* **

**xx**


	28. New Hope

***pretends to be dead* its okay, I didn't die :P Excuses for my LONG update down the bottom… Oops!**

**Could I invent a muscle to pump life around my bones?**

**To beat, instead of this heart-shaped beast I loathe, **

**For surely being heartless would avoid all of those things, **

**That poems claim to be the root of all,**

**If I could turn back all of our days would you, **

**Still know my face, will you still know my face? **

**If I could turn back all of these years, would all of our moments, **

**Be buried by fear, buried by fear?**

**Fear to laugh, and fear to cry, fear of knowing, what it means to die,**

**Fear of hoping, and fear of choking, and fear of loving. **

**Fear of… by Jose Vanders. **

New Hope

I finished straightening my hair and looked at myself in the mirror. Another wave of pain rushed through me, and I gulped. This wasn't meant to be happening now; the baby was three weeks early. I was about to go and meet Jazz, this really wasn't helping. If it could just wait for a couple of hours. Then at least he would be here from the beginning.

I had been getting contractions for the last two hours, but I hadn't said anything. Labour took ages anyway right? I bit my lip; I knew I should be in hospital with the baby being this early.

Kate skipped into the room, but stopped when she saw my face.

"What's wrong?" It came out as a hiss, and she whirled around, looking for danger.

"Nothing, nothing," I said, regaining my composure.

"Something's wrong Alice," Kate growled. Suddenly my jeans were soaked with water.

"Aw crap," I murmured, looking down at my brand new Levi's. Amniotic fluid better wash out.

"We need to get you to hospital," Kate said, carefully pulling my arm.

"No," I snapped. "I need to go pick Jasper up,"

"We'll leave that to Rose, Esme, Carlisle and Edward okay, and they can take him straight to hospital. I'm going to call your mom," I sighed and plopped down on my bed. There was no way she was going to let me go anywhere except hospital.

"Alice is in labour," Kate rushed down the phone. "Yeah, I'm going to take her to hospital. I'll meet you there," she hung up and I scowled.

"I don't want her with me," I muttered.

"Be nice," Kate snapped. "She's really worried about you, she still loves you,"  
"Sure. And what's with you anyway, you're acting really stroppy," I hissed.

"That's because you're being totally nonchalant!" Her arms flailed around in the air and I sighed.

"Let's go then," I said, stomping out of the room and wincing when another contraction hit me. "Ouch," I said, my nails digging into my palm. It was over within thirty seconds.

"You should be timing your contractions," Kate took my hand to help me down the stairs, a lot calmer than before. "When was your last one?"

"About five minutes ago," I said, concentrating on my step. It was hard to see where I was placing my feet.

"And that one lasted about thirty seconds right?" she grabbed a piece of paper off the table by the door and scribbled the details down on it.

"Can we go in my car?" I asked, staring at my Porsche. I still couldn't drive it yet, but Kate could drive… "It would look so cool, arriving at hospital in that…"  
"I'd rather not, if I crash it, you'd kill me," Kate laughed.

"Nice to know you're so confident with driving," I grumbled, pretending to debate whether or not I should get in her car. She stuck her tongue out at me. I ignored her and dialled Rosalie's number.

"Hello?" she answered.

"I'm going in to labour," I said quickly.

"Crap," she swore, and I heard the jangle of keys. "Do you want me to come pick you up?"

"No, Kate's taking me," I replied. "Be there to meet Jazz, and bring him to the hospital,"  
"Alice, he'll kill me if he finds out you're going into labour and I'm not there with you," she moaned. "Carlisle, Esme and Edward can pick him up, I'll be at hospital in five," I heard the rev of her engine, and realised she was driving very fast.

"_I_ won't even be there in five!" I laughed. See you in ten," The dial tone rang, and I sat back in my chair, watching the trees rush past my window.

It felt so strange that this was finally happening. That the thing I had waited nine months for was coming. I had just thought Jasper would be the one to panic and drive me to the hospital, not my best friend, who wasn't a particularly good driver, and the fact that she was driving so fast I had to cling to the seats scared me a little.

"Ouch," I hissed as another contraction ran through me.

"Five minutes again?" Kate asked, chucking the sheet of paper at me. I nodded, waiting for the pain to disappear. It was over in about half a minute again. I noted it down.

The sun beamed down through the glass, and I opened the window so the wind ruffled my hair and clothes.

"It's okay baby," I whispered. "Don't be scared," I knew I was probably scared more than he or she was. It was sitting inside of me, no clue what was about to happen. I, on the other hand, knew I was about to go through a lot of pain.

We pulled up outside the hospital; Rose was already there, shifting from foot to foot.

"Finally!" she groaned, grabbing my hand and tugging me towards reception.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!" I whined, clutching my swollen belly. I knew it was going to hurt me so many times more than this soon, but I wanted to wallow in my pain, just for a little bit. I wanted to be five where my Dad could put a band-aid on my knee if I scraped it, where my Mom could kiss it better.

"Lady with a baby!" Rosalie yelled as soon as we got inside. Kate and I looked at each other, and somehow ended up in hysterics. It just sounded so funny, like it was straight out of a bad sitcom. "You two aren't helping," she snapped, which just made me laugh more. The receptionist looked like she was trying not to smile.

"I'll call a nurse," she said quickly, looking down. I shuffled over to a seat and sat down.

"No! Don't sit down; the nurse will be here in a minute!" Rosalie moaned.

"I'm tired," I whined. "And shouldn't I be saving my energy? What's wrong with you Rose?"

"You're just being so annoying," she yelled, grabbing handfuls of her hair.

"Jeez!" I whispered in Kate's ear. She burst out laughing again. I had forgotten Rosalie had a bit of a temper in stressful situations. Her eyes narrowed into slits and she stomped off towards the ladies. "She'll be back," I said lightly, as a nurse came and stood in front of me with a wheelchair. "No, I can walk!" I said, leaning into Kate for support. Another rush of pain washed through me. "OW!" I yelled, grabbing Kate's hand and squeezing it tightly. She moaned in pain. "CRAP THAT HURTS!" An old woman turned around to look at me. Apparently she didn't appreciate my use of language.

"Okay, I'll have the chair," I gasped, and I lowered myself into it carefully. "Jasper better be here soon," I growled.

Kate asked the nurse what room we were going to, and then relayed the information to the receptionist, telling her to tell Rosalie where we were when she decided to make a reappearance.

Kate rushed me through the hospital, although I was sure she didn't need to rush. Everyone had told me that labour took a long time. The nurse walked briskly beside us, using her pager as she went. I sighed, resting on my arm. This was so weird. My emotions were strangely buoyant, although Jasper wasn't here, and it bloody hurt whenever I got a contraction.

We finally reached the hospital room, and I was helped up onto a bed. A midwife and a doctor rushed in the same time as I did.

"Hello Alice, how are you feeling?" the Doctor asked kindly. I screwed up my face as another contraction sped through me, and I cursed loudly.

"Not. So. Good." I gasped. "It hurts!" he laughed.

"Sounds about normal. We've just got to monitor the birth more closely, seeing as its a few weeks early, but it's nothing to worry about, the baby will just be a lot smaller than usual. It may suffer minor breathing difficulties, but those are pretty easy to sort out. Is the father coming?" I nodded.

"He'll be on his way soon," I told him, feeling the contraction wearing off. "He's getting picked up from the airport,"  
"Okay, good, and it looks like you've got other support here as well, so you should be okay. You just need to persevere with this Alice. The pain is going to be a lot worse,"  
"I know," I sighed.

"Are your parents here?"

"They're on their way too," Kate said, and I scowled at her.

"I just need Jasper," I hissed.

"You need your parents right now," she snapped back at me. I crossed my arms.

"What did I miss?" Rosalie yelled, running into the room. "The baby isn't born yet is it?"

"I wish," I groaned, waiting for the next surge of pain. "It doesn't come that quick Rosalie,"

"Oh, good. I want to be here." I gaped at her. She was a complete and total mad woman sometimes.

"What?" she looked down. "It's exciting," The midwife grinned.

"Okay, we need to see how dilated you are, and when you're going to need the epidural," I let her look, although it felt cringy and nasty, but I had let doctors do it a couple of times before. I mean, I got myself into this mess; I had to deal with what came with it. Even if it meant people looking "up there". I resisted the urge to shudder. I had never been particularly comfortable with things like that, even if it was medical.

"You're just over three centimetres dilated," she told me. "That means that we can't give you an epidural just yet, you're near the beginning of labour still. We'll probably wait until five centimetres, depends on how you're coping,"

"How long will that take?" I moaned.

"A few hours probably," I pulled a face.

"That long?"

"We'll be here next to you through all of it," Kate said gently. Rosalie was already dialling a number into her cell phone. I listened to her conversation.

" EMMY!" she shrieked into it. I grinned. It was Emmett.

"Put it on speaker," I said quickly. "I need something to pass the time," Rosalie pressed a button, and set it down on the table next to me. "Hey Emmett!" I called.

"Hello Bella and baby," I heard him laugh. "How long is it now? Three weeks?"

"Um… About four to nine hours," I laughed. There was silence.

"Shit!" he finally said. "Did I get the date wrong?"  
"Nope, it's a week early," I assured him. He swore again.

"Can you come up?" Rosalie asked. "You can see the new baby,"  
"Yeah, the godfather has to be here," I said, and waited for his response with baited breath.

"Wha-I'm godfather?" he gasped.

"Of course," I laughed. "Who else do you think I would choose?"  
"I thought you would pick Edward!"

"Edward's too young to be an uncle, let alone a godfather! I think you're best person for it,"

"NO FRIKKING WAY! I'm coming down there now!"  
"Can you bring Bella?" I asked hopefully. Emmett sighed.

"Not at the moment Alice, she's in hospital. Again,"

"What happened?" I asked, scared.

"Oh, she fell over in the Blacks' garage again. Why Billy lets her and Jacob in there I don't know,"

"Oh," I was disappointed. I really wanted Bella here. My breath whistled out of me when another contraction caught me by surprise. "OW! OW OW OW! THAT HURTS!"

"You okay?" Emmett sounded pretty scared, and I realised all elements of childbirth were probably new to him. Emmett didn't really concern himself with that kind of thing. I gasped as the pain faded away.

"Fine, contraction." I said swiftly. "So do you think Charlie can bring Bella over later?"  
"He's pretty busy with work Ali, surprisingly. Forks is so small it's a wonder there's any work to do! And Bella's due to go see Mom. I was meant to go as well, but she can live without me for a couple of days, but she'll freak if she doesn't get to see Bella on the day she wants. They hardy ever see each other… I'm sorry Ali."  
"It's okay," I sighed. "I'll come over with the baby when she's back," I heard the purr of an engine in the background.

"Should you be on the phone whilst you're driving?" Rosalie scolded.  
"Relax, Rosie, it's on speakerphone," he laughed.

"Turn it off," she snapped. "I know with all your muscle you could survive a crash, but we don't want to test that!" I heard a chuckle, and then the dial tone rang.

"I'm making both of you godmother," I said quietly, and the two shrieked in unison.

"NO WAY!" Kate shouted, jumping up and down. Rosalie merely squeaked in delight.

"I thought you'd like that," I giggled, as the pair held hands and sprang up and down together.

"Do you think she'll like us," Kate suddenly said, staring down at my huge bulge of a stomach.

"Of course she will! You two are the nicest people I know!" They both bent down to hug me, and went on with their excited dance.

"Alice? Are you okay? What's happening," my Mom ran into the room, flustered and red.

"I'm fine, about three centimetres dilated, I have to wait a couple of hours before the epidural and I just made Emmett godfather, and Kate and Rosalie godmothers," I reeled off. Her eyes flickered to the two girls screeching and jumping up and down in the corner. I grinned.

"Where's Jasper?" she asked. "Weren't you meant to be picking him up from the airport?"

"Esme, Carlisle and Edward are; he should be here soon." I wished he would hurry up. I didn't really want to deal with my Mom on my own. Kate and Rose weren't any help, they were still screaming.

"Alice?" she whispered in a tiny voice.

"Yes?" I snapped.

"I'm sorry," her head dropped. "I… I've been a terrible mother. And I know you must be sick of me apologizing, of me always judging you. It's just, I know that people can make so many mistakes in life…"  
"But I haven't made many mistakes," I hissed. "Once Jasper is back forever my life will be perfect,"  
"You're so young," she said softly. "I'm not sure how long it will last, especially with a tiny baby,"

"We're getting married," I pushed my ring in her face. "Is that enough commitment for you?"

Why didn't you tell me?" she asked, her big blue eyes staring at me. My eyes.

"Because I knew what you'd say!" I groaned. "That I was too young, and I had my whole life ahead of me. Well it's nothing without Jasper."

"Okay," she said, her voice a little hurt, but she didn't press it.  
"SHIT!" I yelled again, as I felt another contraction. "When is this going to bloody end," But my eyes were already drooping, I'd had almost no sleep last night, I was too excited about seeing Jasper, and the tiredness was taking over me…

The pain woke me, and I winced, before glancing at the clock on the wall. I had slept for two hours. It was definitely a lot more painful now. I looked around the room. Kate and Rosalie were engaged in a game of checkers, occasionally sipping at the coffee from the table on the side. The logo said it was from Starbucks, and I wondered how they had gotten it. My Mom wasn't in the room, but Carlisle was walking around, checking charts and things. It took me a minute to realise what this meant.  
"Jasper's back!" I gasped, struggling to sit up, and wincing in pain. Carlisle looked at me sadly.  
"I'm sorry Alice, he's not here. He wasn't on his plane. He missed it. Esme has gone home to see if she can get hold of him,"

"But… but…"

"We'll try and get you here as soon as possible. How are you feeling?"  
"Okay," I said tentatively. "It hurts, a lot." I felt more pain. "Ow, ow, fuckity, ow," I moaned. The midwife walked in, and Carlisle waved a little, before backing out of the room.

"Right, let's see how dilated you are now," she said, and I waited while she checked. I needed that epidural, and now. It hurt so much! More pain ran through me, and a hand suddenly wove its way into mine. I looked up and saw Rosalie wincing as I squeezed her hand hard.

"Just squeeze when you need to," she said gently. I nodded.

"Right, you're five centimetres dilated," the midwife said cheerfully. "I'll go and get the epidural sorted, this baby is coming quickly, you're quite lucky, for a first baby. You should have labour pains every minute or so now, but the baby probably won't come for another hour or two, we have to wait until your cervix is ten centimetres for you to have baby, but we have to try and slow the whole process down a little, so just relax okay," I nodded. I didn't think I could bring myself to speak right now.

"Okay, you ready?" the doctor asked. I nodded again. "Okay, I want you to sit up for me, and slouch a little," I did as I was told, "Okay, now lean forwards so your spine is curved," I held my breath as the catheter was inserted into my spine. "There we go," he said gently, and I winced. I looked at Rosalie, whose eyes were scrunched tightly together. I waited as the medicine slowly spread through my lower body, and I sighed. I felt a lot more relaxed now, and I couldn't feel much pain. The whole of my lower body was numb, and I wriggled a little. It felt strange.

The next two hours dragged by in a strange blur of colours and card games and boredom. The whole time I was worrying about Jasper. Where the hell was he? The midwife kept checking how dilated I was, and then in four words I desperately couldn't hear until I was with Jasper she said:  
"You're ten centimetres dilated." I gasped, it was starting. My little boy or girl was coming. And Jasper wasn't here to see our beautiful baby. I gulped. I wasn't sure I could do this without him. I closed my eyes, the pain could still be felt through my numb body, and it hurt.

All the way through, I wished it could be over. I felt Rosalie and Kate on either side of me, my nails digging into my hands. I had made my Mom stand outside; my Dad had turned up and was waiting with her. All around me I could hear voices, hands pulled through my sweaty hair, and my screams echoing in my ears. Then all of a sudden, after I didn't know how long, it stopped. And something warm and wet was passed into my arms. The tiny baby opened its mouth, and wailed. And I smiled.

"It's a girl," Kate said gently from over my shoulder. My baby girl. I watched as her blue eyes blinked in the new strange light, and I hugged her to me.

"You're so pretty," I whispered. Then she was whisked away again, the only remnants left were blood stains on my shirt.

"Huh?" I moaned, my head spinning to look for my little girl.

"They've just got to check her over Alice, its okay." Rosalie soothed. I waited with baited breath for her. I wanted her back, for her warm body to fit perfectly into my arms. A couple of minutes later she was handed back to me, a thick blanket wrapped around her red skin. I clutched her to me, making little clucking noises I never thought I would actually make.

"When Jazz gets here I can name her," I said gently, stroking her tiny face. She had stopped crying now, and lay still in my arms, gazing back into my eyes. The door creaked open, and I looked up, smiling. Esme walked in, her head bowed.

"Hey Esme, want to see your granddaughter?" I asked happily. Her head lifted, and she smiled faintly. But the sight of her face made my body tense up, and shiver. Tears made long tracks down her cheeks, her eyes bright red. She sobbed a tiny moan, and I began to shake uncontrollably, the movement making my daughter cry again.

"What…What's happened?" I asked, but I knew what it was. I had known all along.

"I… I was waiting at home for Jasper," more tears leaked out of her brown eyes. "And someone knocked on the door. And, it was… it was an officer, from the army." My breath was rattling through my throat in huge gasps, and I felt someone-maybe Kate- whisk the bawling baby out of my arms. "He told me… that Jasper was in a house, he'd been tipped off that there was a huge Al-Qaeda hideout in the basement there, and the whole house. It was… It was completely bombed. Ripped to pieces. And… And they can't identify the bodies, because they're too badly burnt, they need to go through analysis. But… But Jasper was confirmed to be in the building. And he hasn't come back to the base," she dissolved into sobs, which mixed with the high keening wails that came from somewhere, I couldn't quite work out where. It was a few seconds before I realised it was me. I felt… so numb.

"No, No. It's not true," I whispered, but it was barely heard above the five sets of sobs that filled the room.

**OKAY PLEASE DO NOT STOP READING! I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THIS, BUT JASPER IS NOT DEAD, HE IS ALIVE!!! Haha, sorry, had to do that otherwise people would stop reading :P His story is underneath… **

**2 days earlier. **

**Jasper POV**

We didn't usually stray this far from base camp, it was difficult to get back once we were this far out. But Peter and I had been sent out this far, they thought we were clever enough to get back. I stared at my team behind me; their faces were set, waiting for the task. Peter grinned at me, dirt and dust clouding his face, clearly excited by the upcoming task. I wasn't. Every dangerous movement was a step away from Alice and my baby. What if I died, and left them all alone? I was scared Alice would do something rash and stupid, and just leave our child alone. But I knew she wouldn't do that. She had more brains, and she seemed to truly love the little creature inside of her. I loved it to, although I still didn't have the same bond she had to it, where she spent every waking hour with it. It would be nice if I could spend more time with him or her though. I could never see them grow under Alice's stomach, watch it get bigger and bigger. I sighed, looking around at the deserted landscape.

"There," Peter whispered, pointing to the grey building nestled amongst the houses, the one we had been looking for. Our source was reliable; we knew they were probably telling the truth. "You ready?" he asked. I nodded. I hated this, I preferred trying to keep the peace than actually being violent, but this was the only way that we _could _keep the peace. "We're going to do this," he reassured me. "You'll get back to Alice, and I'll get back to Charlotte. And you'll have a baby, and once you finish your time, kaboom, it's happily ever after." I smiled. Happily ever after. A concept that warmed my heart so much, but I knew that it normally only existed in fairy stories. I wished that it could exist between me and Alice; I wanted our future to be perfect. But there was going to be fights, there was going to be unhappiness. We just had to lead each other through it.

We crept up to the building, trying to keep a low profile. Of course, it wasn't easy when you were covered in body padding, and there were about ten soldiers.

"We're going to do this," I whispered to myself. Peter nodded at me. "1…2…3," We smashed into the door so it fell down, pointing our guns into the room. Someone screamed.

"Get down!" Peter yelled. Two people threw themselves to the floor, a woman clutching something to her chest.

"What's that?" I asked, pointing my gun at her.

"Please, please don't hurt him," she whispered. A soft wail echoed from her arms. It was a baby.

"We're not going to hurt him," I said quietly. "Don't worry," Peter had his gun pointed at the man.

"Where are they?" he snarled. "Where are they hidden?"

"Downstairs," he said, his voice thickly accented.

"Stop!" The woman cried; we turned to look at her. "Don't go down!"

"Shush," the man hushed her.

"They'll off a bomb as soon as they realise you're here," she murmured, dropping her voice. "They'd rather be martyred than killed by you," Peter swore.

"Will they know we're here?" I asked. She shook her head.

"No," she whispered.

"What do we do?" I asked Peter quietly. "To catch them, we have to die with them. Or we leave them alone, and they kill other people."

"Why are you telling us this?" another soldier Robert asked. "What's in it for you?"

"If they set the bomb off, they kill my baby," she hissed. "I don't want that happening,"

"GET OUT!" The man suddenly shouted. "THEY'RE HERE! THEY'RE GOING TO KILL YOU!"  
"Crap," several people said simultaneously.

"Everyone get out!" I shouted. People ran for the exit, but the woman stayed where she was.

"Take him," she pleaded, thrusting the bundle towards me.

"Come out, be safe," I said quickly. We needed to get out as soon as possible.  
"They'll find me, they'll kill me," she moaned. The man ran towards the door.

"Jasper! Get out of here!" Peter shouted, before sprinting out of the door.

"They'll never know it was you, we need to get out," I insisted, pulling her hand. She shook her head, pressing the baby into my arms.

"Go, quickly," tears were pouring so fast down her face that they merged into long rivers. Her dark eyes were huge and wide. "His name is Latif," I grabbed the baby, and ran for the exit. I was about thirty feet out of the door, when I heard the explosion, felt the heat, and fell as the pain washed over me.

Everything was dark. Smoke washed across the front of my eyes, so I couldn't see anything. "Hello?" I asked. I glanced down at the boy clutched tightly to me, and examined him quickly. I sighed in relief when I realised he was still alive. He must have been about three months old; he wriggled a little in my arms.

I knew I had to get out of here quickly. Members of Al-Qaeda or the Taliban would come soon, to kill any soldiers who were left, to check if anyone was alive. I knew everyone would have left by now, taking any transport with them, getting back. They would come back later, to look for me, see if I was still alive, but they had to inform the camp first, get bigger teams together, they knew there would be people waiting for them. I got to my feet, swaying a little. The house was completely rubble, and many houses around it had also been damaged. Terror had sped through the tiny village like wildfire, people were screaming and running. I knew I hadn't been knocked out for very long.

Another bang came from somewhere, and I watched as smoke and fire blew into the air across the village. More people screamed, running ever more frantically. I swore. Villages weren't usually targeted, but I guess it was a good place for people to hide out. No one suspecting anyone.

Latif started to cry again, and I rocked him backwards and forwards. He had no parents left anymore. I wondered what I would do if I was put in the same position as that woman. If I would give up my life, just to keep my baby safe. I knew I would. He or she already meant as much to me as Alice did.

"Hey, you," someone hissed. A woman waved to me from her house. "We have basement, you be safe there," I nodded. I either died out here-there was no place I could hide- or I could take a risk, and stay with the woman.

I followed her through the doorway, and she led me down a set of steps into a dingy basement.

"You stay," she whispered. "I got food. And blanket for baby,"

"Thank you," I said, as she handed me some bread and a blanket.

"No thank yous," she protested. "You soldiers save us from them. You help us," I smiled at her. It was nice when some one supported us, helped us. Many people did, but I sometimes felt so isolated out here.

"My name is Zahrah," she told me.

"I'm Jasper,"  
"Where you coming from Jasper?" she asked in her disjointed English.

"Mississippi, in America,"  
"Have you wife? Children?"

"I have a girlfriend," I murmured. "We're getting married soon. She's having a baby in three weeks,"  
"That is good!" she exclaimed, and a huge grin lit up her face. It was like she was happy about my happiness. "You going home to see baby,"

"I'm going home in two days," I really couldn't wait, I was desperate to see Alice again.

"Whose baby this?" she asked, pointing to Latif.

"He's a woman's. I don't know her name. She died in the explosion." Zahrah nodded sadly. "His name is Latif,"

"Good name," she smiled. She still seemed so happy even after what had happened to her. "It means gentle and kind,"

"Do you have a husband, or children?" I asked. Her face sank.

"My husband and children dead," she whispered. It was the first time I had seen her look so sad, and realised why she was so happy. This was nothing compared to what had happened to her.

"I'm sorry," I said softly, putting my hand on her shoulder. She looked up at me and smiled, although her eyes were swimming with tears.

"You need to go home yes? We get you home, but you wait. You can't get killed, and you must save baby Latif."

Another huge explosion came from over our heads, and the walls shook. Zahrah gasped.

"My house," she whispered throatily. We were trapped.

**AN**

**I've finished? Whoa! Its 9 pages long, 5, 135 words. I'm tired. Anyway, in case you're confused Jasper obviously isn't dead. Everyone thought he died in the first bomb blast, the one where he saved Latif, because no one saw him come out of the building, and then he obviously didn't go back, because he's trapped in the basement with Zahrah because her house has fallen down on top of them. He'll get out soon, don't worry. I would never ever kill Jasper. But this is the trigger for a whole new chain of drama. Which I will start tomorrow, because I am feeling very guilty, because I haven't updated in more than a month :\ Which is bad. Very bad. I don't really have excuses, except that school is giving me a lot of homework. Which I'm not doing either. So you're not the only ones who aren't getting any writing from me :P And I keep getting behind with the homework, and then I have loads to do, and just, no time. I wrote the majority of this in the last four days, so it has been taking up a lot of time!! But it's my longest update ever, so hopefully that makes up for the long wait. I listened to loads of music for this chapter, mainly Paramore, Jose Vanders, and Tik Tok by Ke$ha which I love to bits :) I wanted this out for remembrance day, but it just wasn't going to be finished, so I took more time on it, and tried to make it perfect. Should have the next chapter out by Thursday :) Sorry for the long update. Love you all xxx**


	29. Lost Without You

**I****'m not sure how to feel, I'm not sure what is real  
Anymore 'cause I never felt like this, Sometimes it hurts me so bad  
Its the words gotta say, And I cant live like that  
Don't wanna be alone, I'll try but I don't know**

**Without You by Pixie Lott**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight! But I wish I owned Robert Pattinson or Taylor Lautner :D**

Lost Without You

**Alice POV**

Every strand of hope was gone. My universe had disappeared, yet I was still here, still enduring the pain that ripped me apart from the inside, chewed me up and eroded at my heart. I shook so hard that the bed rattled, and I felt fingers stroking my face, as my loud cries mingled with others that came from far away places around the room.

This couldn't be real. He couldn't have gone. Tears rushed down my cheeks, huge fountains of grief.

"No, no, no, no," I repeated over and over. "Not Jazz, not now. Please no," Arms wound around my neck, and I leaned into Rosalie, our tears mixing together until I couldn't tell whose were whose.

I heard Kate's soothing noises to my baby girl; she was crying too, her coos interrupted by sobs. I couldn't breathe; oxygen that had come so naturally to me wasn't there anymore. I was lost in a world of blackness, hanging on the edge of a cliff, waiting for someone to stamp on my fingers, and end all my pain.

I wanted to die. I wanted to just leave this world, and be with my Jasper, forever. But I couldn't, not anymore. He'd left something that I had to stay behind for. My little girl. I grabbed Rosalie's hand; holding on to it like it was my life line. A life line I wasn't sure I wanted.

Something little flew at me, and all I could hear were loud keening cries. Each one broke my heart, and I squeezed Edward against me.

"He's not coming back," he wailed. I cried into his hair, making it salty and wet, but he didn't care. "I. Need. Jasper," he bawled.

"We all do," I hiccupped quietly, stroking his hair. "He was the most special person in the world,"

"I want him back. He needs to be here, so he can make everything better,"

"Sometimes, sometimes we can't always have what we want," I burst into fresh tears. Why did this world always want to keep Jasper and I apart? Except now it was forever. I would never see him again.

Someone burst through the doors.

"Alice," Emmett said quietly, like it was a confirmation. He ran towards me and swept Edward and I into a hug. I watched as he cried. It was strange to see someone like Emmett crying, someone who was always happy, and who could always find the bright side. Nothing could be cheerful anymore. Hope was not here. He gently lowered me back on the bed, and moved to support Rosalie, who was now sitting slumped against the chair, her hand still squeezing mine, her other arm held limply at her side. I felt her release my fingers when she move to wrap her arms around Emmett. I wished I could do that to Jasper, that he could be here to help me through this. But if he was here, none of this would have happened. I pulled Edward closer, but he didn't fill the whole. I knew there was only one person here who could even begin to heal it.

"Kate?" I asked. She turned to look at me, her mascara lying in train tracks down her cheeks. "Can I have the baby," She nodded, and handed me my little girl. I held her in my arms, and watched as Edward stretched his arm out gingerly, stroking her dark hair gingerly.

"What's her name?" he asked.

"I don't know," I sighed, closing my eyes and trying to ignore the pain ripping me apart from the inside, the pain showing through my bloodshot eyes. "What do you think she should be called?" He looked at her for a minute, his green eyes still filled with salty tears. He ran his finger across her face.

"Holly," he said decidedly. I looked at her, her huge blue eyes, and her shock of black hair, her tiny rosebud mouth, and I smiled.  
"Holly's perfect," I sighed, and I rocked her back and forth in my arms. My Holly. Holly who would never know her amazing father.

"Alice?" my Mom's voice echoed from the doorway, but I ignored her. A tear fell onto Holly's face, and I wiped it off. "Alice baby, I'm so sorry. He…He had an amazing life, and you had an amazing life with him,"  
"Mom, I don't want to talk right now okay?" I snapped.

"Mrs Brandon, I'm sorry, but maybe this isn't the best time," Esme said gently, I looked at her thankfully, but her head was still looking at the ground, tears dripping onto it, and forming tiny saltwater droplets.

I waited until my Mom had left the room again until I let more tears come.

"Alice," a nurse whispered gently from next to me. "Alice, I think you need to try and feed the baby now. Do you have a name yet?" I nodded sadly.

Holly," I whispered.

"Okay. You should try and feed Holly now, she's probably hungry. Do you want me to help you do it?" I nodded, and she helped me latch Holly onto my breast. I squirmed. It wasn't exactly comfortable. The nurse smiled. "That's good. A lot of the time it takes a while for the baby to work out how to feed," I nodded, clutching Holly to me.

And I sat there, my baby girl in my arms, my family around me. But the person I wanted most could never be here.

"I love you Jazz," I breathed, hoping that maybe, he might be able to hear me.

**Jasper POV**

We had been here for two days. I should've met Alice at the airport hours ago. She would be worrying. But there was no way I could contact her, not while we were trapped here. I was beginning to wonder whether they would find us at all. It would just look like another blown up house. Would people actually check whether we were alive or not? Zahrah had a reasonable amount of food stashed in her basement, but not enough to last us more than a week. She had a little milk, and we were feeding it to Latif, even though we knew it would not be good for him.

"Do you think we get out?" Zahrah whispered. I looked at her huge dark eyes, and sighed.

"I don't know," I murmured. I had spent the last two days thinking of ways to escape. I couldn't find any.

"Jasper," she said quietly, and she looked up at me. A tear was falling down her cheek. "We probably die, yes?" I closed my eyes. I had to get them out. If I couldn't get out, Zahrah and Latif had to.

"I don't know," I breathed.

"I used to live in city," she sighed. "In Kabul. And one day, my husband takes my children out for walk. Five minutes after he left I hear screams, and I run outside to see what is happening. People are running and screaming. And in the air is smoke. Smoke is over buildings, and I run, but not away like others do. I run towards the smoke. Because I already know what happened. And it hurt, so much." She was almost hysterical now, her words punctured by loud gasps. "And when I got there, there was nothing. It was car bomb, and it had blown the street up. You couldn't tell who a lot of bodies were. They were burnt so badly. So, I went home. And I waited. I waited for three weeks, and they didn't come. So, I move out of city. City bad place. I never thought it would happen here too…"

"I'm so sorry Zahrah," I whispered.

"Was your life good?" she asked. "Back in America?"

"It was when I left," I told her. She leant back, and lay on the floor, her black hair fanning out around her.

"You tell me story, of you and girlfriend?" she asked. I nodded, and she closed her eyes, waiting. Tears still leaked from under her eyelashes. Latif gurgled a little.

"I met Alice at school, I was new. She wouldn't talk; she didn't say a word to anyone. She'd had a horrible past. I spent some time with her, and I got her talking again. And we fell in love. But a little while afterwards, she disappeared, along with a little girl she had met, Bella. We found her bag on a sidewalk. It turned out this had happened before. She had been kidnapped, and they thought that was what had happened this time. My family and I looked everywhere for her, but she was nowhere. I became very depressed. So I joined the army. And I came home one time, and Alice was waiting for me at the airport. I was amazed; I didn't even know she'd gotten back no one had told me. She had been kidnapped by a guy called James, the same one who had kidnapped her before. I went away again, and found out she was pregnant. And last time I saw her, I proposed. And that's it really."

I missed Alice. So much. I wanted to be with her right now, like I should be. I wanted to hold her in my arms, stroke her hand, and kiss her soft lips. I smacked my hand down on the ground in frustration. Zahrah opened her eyes and looked at me sympathetically.

"You love her a lot," she said quietly. I nodded.

"I miss her," my voice came out as a strangled croak. "I miss her more than anyone else at home, my parents, my twin sister, my little brother. I miss her more than I did when she was gone for all those months, because I know now that I _could _be with her, she's right there at home. She'll be worrying about me,"  
"I hope we get out, you need to get back to her," Zahrah murmured.

**Alice POV**

"You're allowed to go home now Alice," Carlisle said gently, from somewhere next to me. "Do you want a lift home?" I nodded. It had been a day. The hours had dragged past slowly, merging into one long piece of time, something I no longer cared about.

Holly was passed into my arms and I smiled the tiniest smile. She was the only thing that meant happiness in my life, and I felt guilty for it. The piece of happiness that Jazz had never been around for.

I was vaguely aware of being taken to Carlisle's Mercedes, but the world meant nothing to me anymore. I kept my eyes fixed on Holly. The journey home was quick. Time. It changed all the time. It just never went back.

I was greeted by arms at home. Kate's pale, scarred arms around my neck, Cynthia's warm, tiny arms around my waist. Then when they let go, my mother moved forwards to hug me. I stood like a statue in her arms.

"Alice…" she pleaded. I ignored her. I walked past my father, who was standing at the front door, and went straight up to my room. I knew Kate was following me, and I turned to face her once I had placed Holly in the new crib next to my bed.

"Maybe you should try and make up with her," she said cautiously. "She knows she was wrong,"

"It doesn't matter to me any more," my voice was a hoarse whisper. "Nothing matters."  
"I sure hope Holly matters," she snapped. "Because you don't deserve her if she doesn't," I looked up at her, shocked.

"Of course she does!" I hissed.

"Well maybe you should remember that other people have been affected by Jasper's death too," I winced. "Carlisle, Esme, Edward, Rosalie, and me. Sure, I didn't know him as well as any of you did, but he was still my friend. Rosalie was his _twin sister_. Don't you think she might be almost as upset as you? And you haven't said a consoling word to her, even though she's been so nice to you. I know this is horrible Alice, but you don't have to turn into a jerk," she turned on her heel, and stomped out of the room.

I threw myself down onto the bed, and sobbed. I wasn't prepared for this. This was never what was meant to happen. Jasper and I were meant to get married soon. And now he was gone, forever.

I lay there for a long time, crying until no tears were left. I eventually got up, walking over to the window. I gasped.

"No, oh no." I whispered, retreating backwards several steps. "No." I had seen the van waiting outside, and I knew what it meant. "James," I croaked.

I ran to the top of the stairs. "KATE!" I screamed. There was no answer. I let out a tiny frantic sob, and rushed back to my room. I screamed as soon as I went in. James was sitting on my bed, my tiny Holly cradled in his arms.

"I heard the good news," he leered. "Your friend Kate just went out and your parents left a while ago. I thought I'd pay your little girl a visit."  
"Let go of her," I snarled. He stood up, and jerked his arms, making as if to drop her. I shrieked, my hand outstretched. He laughed cruelly.

"What's her name Alice?" I kept my mouth closed. "Tell me," he jerked his arms again.

"Holly!" I screeched. Holly woke up, and started to wail. "Give her to me, please," I whispered. "You can take me, just not her. Please. Please."

A car pulled up on the gravel outside. I whimpered a little.

"Shush," James hissed. I heard a key in the lock.

"Alice?" Kate called. I closed my eyes. Not Kate as well. She couldn't be here, she couldn't go back there. I heard her coming up the stairs. "Ali, I'm sorry." Another pair of feet followed her. I gasped. James was frozen to the spot. The door opened, and Kate walked in. She screamed. "No," she whispered. "Not you," Emmett walked into the room behind her. He looked between Kate, James and I, and his eyes narrowed.

"You're him!" he snarled, and ran towards James.

"Emmett, careful, he has Holly!" I shouted. But Emmett had already punched James around the face. Luckily, he thought quickly, and caught James before he fell, taking the screaming Holly carefully out of his arms. He turned around to pass her to me, and when he looked back, James was gone. The window was wide open. All three of us ran to it, to watch James run to his van, get into it and drive away.

"How the hell did he do that?" Emmett snarled, and he swore under his breath. Both Kate and I were shaking uncontrollably, and I held Holly tightly to my chest. I bit my lip. I needed to get away. I needed to run.

**A/N:**

**So… it's a week later than I said it would be :/ But I do have a proper reason. My USB stick snapped in half. So all my story files, my coursework, and all my video and music files are gone :( I saved them all to the memory stick in the first place because my laptop very rarely wipes its memory, it did it once before, so I thought I'd be safe. And I lost it all! Luckily I had written half this chapter, but it was still up when my memory stick snapped, so I saved it to somewhere different, but I've spent all week retyping bits of coursework, which are like five pages long. Luckily most of them were printed, so I just copied them from that!! And I have my GCSE mocks over the next two weeks, so updates may be slow okay? I want one out this weekend, but it probably won't happen :/ **

**OMG who's seen New Moon?? IT'S AMAZING!! I'm Team Edward, but when Taylor Lautner kept almost crying my heart just completely melted. Although Edward's sexy walk was soo funny and lovely :) **

**Big hugs to twilight2muchx3 who desperately wanted the baby to be called Massie! She's put it in the last like eight reviews!! I decided to call her Holly, just because it fits her so well, and also because one of my best friends is called Holly, and she's going through some shit at the moment, and I thought it would be nice to name Alice's baby after her :D**

**Lovee youu!**

**xx**


	30. Getting Away

**I wonder, how am I supposed to feel when you're not here.  
'Cause I burned every bridge I ever built when you were here.  
I still try... holding onto silly things, I never learn.  
Oh why? All the possibilities. I'm sure you've heard.**

That's what you get when you let your heart win.  
That's what you get when you let your heart win.  
I drowned out all my sense with the sound of its beating.  
And that's what you get when you let your heart win. 

**That's What You Get by Paramore**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight unfortunately :(**

Getting Away

**Alice POV**

"Are you okay Ali?" Emmett asked, sweeping me into a careful bear hug, making sure he didn't crush the fragile body between us. "He didn't hurt you did he?" I shook my head, rocking Holly backwards and forwards in my arms. I felt numb. Kate, who was sitting on my bed, whimpered.

"He didn't hurt me," I whispered into his chest. "But I thought he was going to hurt Holly,"

"I would never let him," he growled. "Never,"

"Thanks Em," I sighed. "You're an amazing godfather," He grinned.

"I really get to be godfather?"

"Of course you do!" He stood back, and looked at me, my swollen, red, eyes, my paler than usual skin, my tired features.

"Oh Alice," he put his face in his hands. "This shouldn't have happened to him. This shouldn't have happened to you," I felt the tears flooding from my eyes again. "I was talking to Carlisle. The funeral will be once they've found his body. If they don't find it we'll have a remembrance service," I let a tiny sob exit my lips, but reined the rest in. Emmett didn't need to see me so upset. I turned and placed Holly back in her crib.

"Do you want something to eat?" Kate asked. "You haven't had any food in ages." I shook my head.

"I'll get you some pancakes." Emmett said decidedly. "Um, Kate, how do you make pancakes?" She smiled weakly.

"I'll help you, we don't want the kitchen to set on fire!"

"I'll call Rosie okay Alice?" Emmett asked. I nodded, and waited until they closed the door behind them.

I ran to closet and swung open the doors, running inside and digging under clothes racks. I finally pulled out my big rucksack, and threw a couple of pairs of jeans, leggings, underwear and t-shirts into it. I sprinted out again, sliding a little on the wooden floor. I pushed nappies baby clothes and blankets into it, and then pulled my baby sling out from under my bed. I carefully lifted Holly out of her crib, and pulled layers of clothes onto her, I knew she couldn't really go outside much this young, but I didn't have a choice. I wrapped her in a thick blanket, swung the sling over me, and placed her in it. Her blue eyes stared up at me, as if she was wondering what I was doing. She wriggled when my hot tears hit her face.

I grabbed my purse off my bedside table, there was enough money in my bank account to last me a long time, especially if my parents kept sending my allowance. Then again, they could stop it all together when I was gone.

I pulled a notebook out of the drawer and scribbled some words on it quickly, just so they knew James hadn't got me.

_Emmett & Kate, I'm sorry. I have to go, I can't stay here. Look after Edward, Bella, Rose & Cynthia for me. I love you both. Alice xx_

I stroked Holly's face, pleading silently that she would be quiet. I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath in.

There was no noise coming from the kitchen, just the sizzle of pancakes. The air seemed to hold grief in every particle, but I didn't have time to just stand there and let it hit me. I had to get out. Wiping the leftover tears from my face, I crept past the kitchen, pausing briefly to glance at Emmett and Kate, both looking down at the floor.

With a last step, I carefully opened the door and stepped outside. The sun glared down on me, and I closed my eyes for second, letting it warm my wet eyelids.

"I'll miss you Jazz," I whispered, and walked down my garden path, leaving my house, my family, my friends, leaving Biloxi behind.

Holly murmured a little against my chest as I walked down the road. Children cycled past, wobbling a little, their hair streaming in the wind. I watched a couple swing their toddler between them, the little girl giggling in delight. Sunlight reflected off of windows.

"Alice!" someone shrieked behind me, and I froze. I closed my eyes, and turned around slowly. It was no use running now, I had too much weight, and they'd catch up with me easily. But instead of Kate or Emmett, a small girl with red ringlets bounded up to me.

"Maggie," I said softly.

"How's Edward? He was so upset when I last saw him, he didn't say much, and he didn't want to play much either. But I made him play, because it doesn't help if you sulk all the time, that's what Mommy says," she babbled.

"Maggie, let Alice speak," Siobhan laughed, walking up the road behind her. She looked at me, my bloodshot eyes, my tear stained cheeks, and my huge bag, and her eyebrows rose.

"Going somewhere?" she asked. I nodded silently. "Alice, running away from your problems doesn't help,"  
"Nothing can help my problem," I murmured. "I have to go. Bye Siobhan. Bye Maggie." I turned around, and made my walk faster, praying they wouldn't follow me.

"Alice!" Siobhan called, but she didn't come after me. She had seen in my face that I didn't want to stay here. I needed to go.

I was constantly spinning around worried that Kate, Emmett, Rosalie, Carlisle, Esme, or even worse, James would be following me.

My relief only came when a taxi headed around the corner. I flagged it down, and clambered in.

"Train Station," I gasped. I couldn't get a plane; it involved too much waiting around. At least with a train I could just get on the first train that arrived at the station. The driver glanced at me in the mirror, and I dropped my head. I knew I looked a mess, but I was going to have to live that. Holly felt warm and soft against my chest, the only thing that was keeping me grounded, here.

The ride to the station wasn't a long one. I threw twenty dollars at the driver, and dragged my bag off the seat. I was there. I could go wherever I wanted. Or I could just go home, and be with the people I loved. I shook the idea off. James would find me. I would lose Holly. That couldn't happen.

**Jasper POV**

There wasn't much time left for us. Zahrah and I had run out of food yesterday, and this morning, the milk had run out. Latif was screaming, he wasn't used to being so hungry. Zahrah was rocking him frantically in her arms, her face tired and drawn.

"Hello?" a muffled voice called. "Is someone in there?" Both of us gasped, and looked upwards.

"Help!" I yelled, as loudly as I could. "Help, we're trapped!" People were scrabbling over our heads, dust fell from the ceiling. "Help!" I called again, grinning at Zahrah, whose face was alight with happiness. As long as it wasn't the Taliban, or Al-Qaeda we were fine. I prayed it would be a soldier, someone who could help us.

"We're moving some of the rubble, you should be out soon," someone called, and with a gasp I realised who it was.

"Peter?" I yelled, shocked. There was silence.

"Jasper? Jasper is that you? Oh god. Jasper?"

"It's me!" I shouted. The scrabbling became faster, more frantic, and suddenly, light beamed down the stairs. I staggered towards it. "Peter?" I asked. I fell, and everything went dark.

***

"Jasper. Jazz. Wake up," someone was slapping my face, and I swatted them away. They sighed in relief. "Thank god man! We all thought you died in the bomb. How the hell did you get out?"

"Whaa?" I murmured. Something was put into my hands. Something that felt like… "Bread!" I exclaimed, bringing the food to my mouth. It felt like it was the best thing I'd ever eaten, even though I knew it couldn't be.

"Jasper, I think you're going to have to call home," Peter said. I looked at him, took in his worried eyes, his teeth chewing on his bottom lip.

"You told them I was dead?" I asked breathlessly. "Crap. Alice."

"I'm sorry. We really thought you were dead," I looked around the truck; Zahrah was sitting in the back, watching me, clearly frightened. Latif was cradled in her arms.

"Alice," I whispered again, and for the second time, everything went black.

**Carlisle POV**

"Rose!" Emmett shouted, barging in through the door. Esme stood up, her tear filled eyes looking worried. I walked into the hall, to see Emmett bounding up the stairs. Kate rushed in the door behind him.

"Kate, what's happened?" I asked.

"It's Alice!" she cried. "She's run away!"

"What?" Esme whispered. "Why would she do that?"

"James came to the house," Kate sobbed. "And she was really scared, but Emmett got him out. We went downstairs to get her some pancakes. And when we went back up, she was gone. She left this note. She passed me the piece of paper, and I read it quickly.

"Have you tried calling her cell?" I asked. Kate nodded.

"She left it in the house," Rosalie ran down the stairs, Emmett following her, both of them sprinting towards the garage.

"We're going to go and check the airport!" Rose called.

"I'll check the train station," Kate whispered, running back outside again.

"We should go look around the streets," I said to Esme. She nodded, and I grabbed my car keys off the side. Edward appeared at the top of the stairs, and Esme ran up and picked him up, and both of us headed towards my Mercedes.

It was starting to get dark; I wasn't sure how much longer we could continue looking for Alice. She wasn't stupid. She knew how to get away quickly if she wanted to. We passed a woman and her little girl, and without warning the little girl jumped up and down, waving at us.

"It's Maggie!" Edward exclaimed. "Daddy, stop a minute," I stopped, and Edward ran out of the car towards the little girl. She chatted animatedly to him, and I got out and walked towards them.

"And Alice looked so upset; do you know what the matter with her is? She was running away,"

"You saw Alice?" Esme asked, I realised she was behind me. The woman nodded slowly.

"She didn't say much, only that nothing could help her problem. I don't know where she was heading," Esme put her head in her hands. I closed my eyes. We couldn't lose Alice. Not now.

Esme's cell phone rang, and she let it buzz for a few seconds before she answered it. Suddenly, she screamed, and dropped it like a hot potato. I picked the phone up. Who was it? Who was scaring my wife like that?

"Who is this?" I asked furiously.

"Dad, it's me. It's Jasper!" I gasped, and leant against the wall next to me for support. I looked at Esme, and saw the grin on her face. Jasper hadn't scared her, he'd merely shocked her.

"Jasper?" I asked.

"Yes!" he laughed. "I'm okay, I was in a building, and it collapsed, and they didn't realise I was there, so they thought I was dead, but I'll explain more when I get home. Why isn't Alice answering her cell?" I closed my eyes. I was going to have to explain this to him.

"Jazz, Alice, she had her baby two days ago,"

"Two days?" he swore. "She's okay isn't she? Is she okay? Is the baby okay?"

"They're both okay," I soothed him. "Alice and Holly,"

"I have a little girl?" he asked.

"Yes," I whispered, "She's beautiful," Esme had swept Edward up in her arms and was kissing him all over, much to his disgust.

"Well why isn't she answering her cell then?" he demanded.

"Jasper, James came to Alice's house today," I heard his sharp intake of breath. "Its okay, Emmett got him out before he could do anything. But… Alice freaked out. And, she's taken Holly, and she's run away,"

"She's what?" he gasped. "I'm getting on a plane now, and I'm coming home," He hung up.

"I love you Jasper." I breathed into the receiver. "Don't do anything stupid,"

**A/N:**

**YAY, three days! That's the quickest update I've done in ages!! I think I've only got like six more chapters :O That'll be weird when I'm done! I'm sorry I'm putting more and more drama into this! It'll all work out okay, don't worry!! Review pleeeease :) **


	31. BandAid

**Now I'm told that this is life  
And pain is just a simple compromise  
So we can get what we want out of it  
Would someone care to classify,  
A broken heart and twisted minds  
So I can find someone to rely on**

And run, to them, to them  
Full speed ahead  
Oh you are not, useless, we are just

Misguided ghosts  
Traveling endlessly  
The ones we trusted the most  
Pushed us far away

**Misguided Ghosts- Paramore :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight geddit?**

Band-aid

_Ten years later…_

"Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to Holly, Happy Birthday to me," I sang quietly, watching my lips move up and down, around the notes and words. I couldn't go back to bed, not now. This was the time of year I dreaded, the time of year I didn't want to come. I knew it should be the other way round; Mom couldn't keep me away from the world enough to stop me from realising that. But I hated the time from two days before my birthday, to about a month afterwards. The time where pillows had saltwater puddles on them in the morning, the time where sometimes I couldn't get to sleep, because her stifled sobs scared me. The time when the name Jasper was murmured over and over again, in her restless sleep.

My Dad had died two days before my birthday, so I had never met him. I'd never met any of my family. I guess I felt sad about it, but really, you can't miss something you never had. It was different for Mom. She cried herself to sleep most nights, especially around this time of year, the time when he had died. She tried to hide it from me, but I knew. I wasn't six anymore. I was ten, ten that day. Double figures.

I glanced around the bathroom, and then glared at myself in the mirror, pushing my dark hair back from my pale face. We were staying in another hotel. They were all pretty much the same, bland colouring and simple decorations. I'd seen my fair share of them. We never stayed in a place for more than two weeks at a time. During the last few days, she would get even more jumpy than she was normally, peering out of the window all the time, and yelling at me if I even moved the curtains, or made a loud noise.

I sighed, splashing water on my face. I looked back up at the mirror, and watched as the beads of water clung to my eyelashes. I blinked rapidly, sending them flying down my cheeks.

Mom could be the best mom ever sometimes. She'd sit with me, and we'd paint pictures, or give each other makeovers, or dance around the room, iPods plugged into our ears, so that only we could hear the music. She taught me how to sew and knit, how to draw, and how to colour without going over the lines.

I was homeschooled; it was the only way I could be taught, what with our lifestyle. Mom was the best teacher; she encouraged my imagination, so that I could write pages and pages of stories on whatever I fancied at the time. She taught me to read, patiently helping me over little words, until my reading got gradually better, and I learned to do it on my own. She was good at Math and Science, we did experiments together that sometimes went wrong, but we had so much fun doing them. Sometimes I thought I was better off being home schooled, that I learnt way more.

But sometimes, it would be the opposite. She'd sit in a chair, and her eyes would stare into space, glazed over, and you'd know she wasn't going to teach you anything. No games would be played, no fun would happen. So I would walk back to my room, and try and teach myself; I would read a book, and write about it, things like that. And I would try and block out the sobbing that echoed around every corner of the plain hotel room.

I ran a bath and slid into it, the water a little too hot, turning my skin red. I knew the night was going to be a long one.

"Happy Birthday Holly," I whispered to myself again.

When the bath water had turned cold, I sat shivering on the toilet, one of the big fluffy towels wrapped around myself. And somehow, sitting in an upright position, I managed to fall asleep.

***

I woke up with a start, my head jerking up from where it had been laying on my chest. I rubbed my neck. It hurt.

I couldn't tell from the windowless room what time it was, so I pulled on some clothes, and carefully cracked the bathroom door open. Light flooded the bedroom, and the double bed in the middle was made. I tiptoed out cautiously, wondering if Mom would be sitting there, crying in her chair. But when she saw me she grinned at me, even though her eyes were red and her cheeks were blotchy. I knew she was going to try and make my birthday good.

"Happy Birthday sweetie," she sang, pulling me into a tight hug. She let go of me and handed me a silver-wrapped box. "Go on, open it!" she encouraged, sitting down on the edge of the bed. I joined her, and very carefully slid my finger under the tape, making sure I didn't rip the paper. Mom groaned impatiently, but I didn't hurry. I liked opening my presents slowly; it drew out the excitement for longer.

I finally had the silvery paper off, and I slid the lid off the box. I gasped. Nestled in amongst turquoise tissue paper was the prettiest necklace I had ever seen. It was a silver chain, with a heart shaped locket on the end. Around the locket were tiny coloured beads, catching the light and sending sparkles around the room and up the cream walls. I carefully opened the heart, and smiled when I saw a picture of me and Mom in it.

"Do you like it?" she asked, biting her lip.

"I love it!" I squealed, throwing my arms around her neck. She laughed a little, although I could hear the sadness in every word she said. She pulled my hair up, and fastened the locket around my neck. It fitted perfectly; it wasn't too long, like most grown up necklaces were on me, and it wasn't a kiddie necklace that barely did up.

"We can do whatever you want today," she grinned. I thought about it for a second.

"Can we go for ice cream?" I asked. I watched her eyelids open and close, and waited for her answer. She hated going outside, we only really did it to get groceries, or to walk to an airport or find a taxi. She was always scared of something, like she thought someone was going to creep up behind us. I watched her think about it, chewing on her bottom lip. Finally she sighed.

"Fine," she murmured, defeated. I grinned.

"Can we have ice cream for breakfast?"

"Ice cream for breakfast?" she giggled. "That's strange,"

"No it's not, it gives you energy," She stuck her tongue out at me and laughed.

"Sure, I guess so then,"  
"Yes!" I yelled, punching my fist up in the air. She laughed again.

"Come on then. Get some clothes on and we'll go and get some ice cream,"

I ran to the closet, which was filled with all my clothes, something the maids always found strange. I searched through and grabbed a black skirt, dotted with tiny colourful flowers, and a black top with spaghetti straps to go with it. Mom nodded in approval once I whirled around to show her what I was wearing.

Albuquerque was baking hot at this time of the year, even at eight o clock in the morning. I danced down the street in the sunlight, letting it wash over my face, my worn ballet pumps padding along the hot sidewalk.

I heard Mom calling after her, but I ignored her, just letting myself fly down the street. She worried too much. My long hair swirled around me, the sunlight reflecting off it. My new necklace sent sparkles around the street, up brick walls and across the road.

I suddenly stopped, looking around. The streets were packed with people, and not one of them seemed to be my Mom. I whirled around, trying to work out how fast I had been going. What if I had taken a wrong turn, and we were headed in different directions? I cursed myself for being so stupid and running ahead. I started to sprint back in the direction I had come from.

Scared little sobs were coming from me now, and people were starting to stare. I just ran faster. Too fast. I stumbled over my feet, and fell on the hard floor, crying out in pain. I felt the tears rushing down my cheeks. Someone's hands closed around my arms and gently pulled me into a sitting position.

A man was crouched in front of me. He was about the same age as my Mom, his skin was golden, tanned from the hot sun, and his eyes were a bright blue, which looked amazing next to his blonde hair.

"Are you all right?" he asked. I shook my head, still sobbing a little.

"I fell over!" I cried. My leg was flat out on the hot ground, and he looked at it carefully.

"It's just a graze," he told me. "You'll survive. Here, I've got some band-aids in my bag." He slung a rucksack off his back and rummaged in one of the many pockets, finally pulling a little box out of it. He pulled a band-aid out and carefully pulled off the paper, sticking it to my knee. "There you go," he said. "It'll be good as new in a week or so," I smiled a little.

"Thank you," He smiled at me, and frowned.

"Why were you running so fast?" he asked. "You looked scared."

"I've lost my Mom," I wailed, bursting into fresh tears as I remembered why I had fallen over in the first place.

"Hey, don't cry," he murmured, giving me a hug. "We'll find her. She can't be that far away. What's your name?"

"Holly," I sniffed. I watched him frown again, his golden forehead creasing up as if my name caused him pain.

"I'm Jasper," he told me.

"Holly!" someone yelled frantically.

"That's her!" I exclaimed. "Thank you Jasper!"

"My pleasure," he said, as I ran to find Mom.

**Alice POV**

"Holly!" I screamed, looking around at the densely packed crowd. "Holly!" My heartbeat had sped up dramatically. Did James get her; had he followed us here as well? He had managed to trace us to every other place, even though I had changed both our surnames, made sure I didn't leave any traces behind.

"Mom!" someone yelled, and suddenly my arms were full of Holly, her soft skin, her long silky hair, her flowery scent.

"Holly, Holly, Holly," I whispered over and over, clutching her tightly to me. "Don't ever do that to me again," I let her go, and looked her over. Her cheeks were tear-stained, dirt covered her clothes. A band-aid was stuck over her knee. "What happened to you?"

"Fell over," she sniffed. "Jasper put a band-aid on me," I tried to ignore the stabbing pain I felt when she said that name. I knew I was being silly. I wasn't going to live my life without someone mentioning someone called Jasper. It was just hard, hearing his name and knowing I would never be able to say it again.

"Who's Jasper?" I asked, wincing a little.

"A man who helped me up," she said matter-of-factly.

"What did I tell you about talking to strangers?" I snapped. She was silent for a minute.

"Can I have some ice cream now?" she asked. I sighed.

"Come on then," I looked behind me as we walked into the ice cream parlour, scared that James could be following us. And as we walked into the cool room, I realised I was never going to get rid of him.

**A/N:**

**Oh shit, sorry. That's the second time gap I've done. But it was kinda necessary. But you saw Alice and Holly, AND JASPER in this one XD I wanted to do the Holly POV at the beginning, because you can get a feel for Alice's depression, and their lifestyle and things like that. Alice was so close to seeing Jasper :O**

**I had a new fanfic idea!! So there will be something when this one is finished, but maybe not for a month or so, because I have to make sure I can finish it, I don't know if anyone noticed, but I deleted nearly all of my old stories this week, because I'm never going to finish them. This one's going to have vampires in it :) **

**Okay, so next chapter won't be up until next week probably, I have exams all this week, and will be revising. I did my German speaking yesterday, and my French speaking today. They went okay, I completely blanked in the German one, and just made up sentences as I went along, and I managed to get an A!! I don't know what I got in French though, he wouldn't tell me :( **

**I'm a bit annoyed tonight, because I went to see the doctor, because I've had a sore throat for four weeks and last night my mum looked, and I have swollen tonsils and white spots on them. I looked, and I saw them too. But the doctor said he couldn't see them. So I went home, looked and they're pretty obvious. I think he's going blind. But he gave me some penicillin, and I just feel ill now. Don't know why I needed to tell everyone that, but I'm annoyed, so :| **

**Review please ;)**


	32. Something Missing

**Can't you see that you're smothering me  
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control  
Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you  
Every step that I**** take is another mistake to you  
And every second I waste is more than I can take**

I've become so numb I can't feel you there  
Become so tired so much more aware  
I'm becoming this all I want to do  
Is be more like me and be less like you

**Linkin Park- Numb**

Something Missing.

**Alice POV**

I span my spoon around in the ice cream, watching it turn into sticky liquid. Holly sat in front of me, shovelling strawberry ice cream into her mouth and talking at the same time, so that her chattering came out kind of muffled. I let myself tune out, she wouldn't notice anyway. Holly reminded me of myself before the first time James took me, forever chatting away, even if there was no one listening.

I watched the beautiful girl in front of me and sighed. I had done so much to keep her safe. We changed our names often, at the moment we were Alice and Holly Cullen. It didn't stop James from tracking us. I don't know how he did it, but he always seemed to be there, usually a week or two after we arrived in a place. And as soon as I caught sight of him, we moved again. I knew it wasn't good for Holly, moving her from place to place, but for her safety, it was best.

I twirled my engagement ring round and round my finger. The last present Jasper had ever given to me. It sparkled in the light. Cold and dead. Just like him. I tried to keep the tears back; it would be embarrassing to cry in the middle of all these people. I stopped looking at it and twirled my hair round and round my finger. I hated it long. But if it stopped James recognizing me, then it had to be like that.

Holly finished her ice cream, and went strangely silent for a minute. She was watching the other tables, families and birthday parties, parents and children, friends. She sighed, placed her elbows on the table, and cupped her head in her hands.

"Mom," she asked quietly. "Do I have any other family? Like Grandparents, or Aunts and Uncles?" I gulped. I knew this question would come up at some point. In fact, I had expected it to come up sooner. But Holly had this knack of knowing when I didn't want things mentioned. Unfortunately, sometimes curiosity got in the way, and she would ask them anyway. Her big blue eyes were fixed on mine, as if she was watching for a lie. I gulped. I didn't know what to tell her. And at that moment, I knew that all I _could _tell her was the truth.

"Yes," I whispered, and my voice was a hoarse whisper, like the truth was being ripped out of me. "Yes, you have grandparents. And two aunts, and an uncle."

"What are their names?" her voice was filled with awe, over these people she never knew existed, over these people who I missed more than anything.

"My parent's names are Emma and David." I said quietly. "And Ja… your Dad's parents are called Carlisle and Esme. I have one sister called Cynthia, and then Rosalie and Edward are your other Aunt and Uncle."

"What are they like?" she touched my arm gently, and I knew she wouldn't be asking unless she really wanted to know. I had become a lot warmer towards my parents in the last ten years. They had kept sending me money, putting it into my bank account. I had to be careful of where I took it out, making sure it wasn't somewhere I was staying, but I was extremely thankful for it, especially after the coldness I had shown to them those last couple of years. I missed Carlisle, Esme, Rose and Edward so much, that it hurt to even think of them. It hurt even more to think of Cynthia. They appeared in my dreams, along with Emmett, Kate and Bella, haunting me.

"They're all wonderful," I said slowly. "Have you finished your ice cream now?" I changed the subject quickly, and she noticed, but she didn't say anything more.

**Jasper POV **

I threw my rucksack down on the bed, and flopped down next to it. Another city, another hotel room. And I still hadn't got any closer to finding Alice, or Holly.

My phone rang, and I rummaged through my bag to find it.

"Jasper, where are you?" Emmett asked.

"Albuquerque." I told him.

"Any sign of them? At all?" he asked.

"No," I sighed. "Nothing. Emmett, it would be Holly's tenth birthday today. I've missed out on exactly ten years of her life. I…I don't know what to do. I've searched for years, and I haven't found a trace of them."

"Jasper, maybe you should come back," he murmured. "It's been ten years Jasper. They could have left the country, anything. You can't search the whole world Jazz."

"I know. I just keep… keep feeling that I'm going to find them. And if I was at home, I'd be thinking that I could've found them if I just kept searching,"

"We miss you," Emmett said sadly.

"It's Unca Jasper!" someone cried. "Lemme have phone daddy." There was a scuffling, and then a little voice came on the end. "Hello Unca Jasper! Are you coming to see me soon?"

"Maybe Cass," I laughed. "But when I come, I'll bring you a present, yeah?"

"Yes." She said sternly. "A good one."

"You're a four year old version of your mother," I teased.

"I'm almost five," she snapped. There was a loud bang. "Owww!" she screamed down the phone.

"Oh crap," I heard Emmett say in the background. "It's okay Cassie, it's alright, don't cry." Cassie was still holding the phone, and bawling into it. "Rose! Cass fell off the couch!"

"Well pick her up then!" Rosalie yelled back, her voice faint from where I was.

"Err… Jazz, I'll call you back later okay?" He hung up, and I laughed a little, and then it faded into another sigh. I missed my family, my immature brother in law, my twin sister, my little niece, Edward, and my parents. But I missed Alice more. And I desperately wanted to see my little girl.

I thought of the girl I had seen earlier. She would probably be the same age as _my _Holly now. I wondered if my daughter was like that, happy and young, and the worst thing that could happen to her was getting lost. I wanted to know her so badly, but I wasn't sure if I ever would.

**Holly POV**

The hotel room was cool when we got inside, and I ran and jumped on the bed, lying flat out on the new clean sheets. Mom followed, her head down, and she walked straight into the bathroom. I sighed. She hadn't said much since I had asked her about my family. I wanted to know so much about them, what they were like, whether they knew me or not. Mom said we had been travelling all my life, but was I born at home, did they see me then? Did they not want me or mom, is that why we couldn't go back.

I crept across the room, and grabbed her bag off the side, searching through it for her purse. I found it quickly, the smooth leather brushing against my skin, and I took it out. I opened it up; Mom never let me look in her purse. Inside were some coins, some notes, and a couple of credit cards. I pulled them out, and found what I was looking for. Behind the plastic rectangles, were a few photographs, torn at the edges, and damaged from being in the purse for so long.

I put everything back, and placed the photographs on the bed. The first one I picked up was of a little girl and boy. They were much younger than me, probably about four or five. They were sitting on the ground, pieces of paper spread out underneath them. Their hands were covered in paint, and they were making handprints on the white paper. The girl's brown hair was tied up, and down her cheek were long cuts and grazes. Despite these, she was still grinning widely, and her hand was stretched out towards the boy, who already had several handprints on his shirt.

The next one was of more people. The boy and the girl from the picture before were in it, standing at the front, the girl's cuts were healing now, and some of them were barely visible anymore. Her arms were bare, and you could see scars all down them, long puckered lines that made you want to turn away. The boy was holding her hand, grinning. Behind them, a beautiful blonde girl was fiddling with her hair, and the huge guy next to her was pulling a face at the camera. Two adults stood in the middle, watching the two children at the front and smiling. I glanced at the girl in the corner, and gasped. My Mom's hair was short and spiky, and she was grinning, although her eyes looked sad, and lonely. Her face was covered in cuts too, healing just like the little girl's. I touched her ruined face; the face I always thought was so perfect now. What had happened to her?

The last picture was just of two people. My Mom was the first one I saw, her cuts just scars now, fading away. Her hair was still short, sticking up all over the place. I looked to her right, and brought the picture up to my face. I knew who this was. This was my father. I studied his face. I had never really looked much like my Mom; I only had her eyes and her hair. I was almost as tall as her now, so I definitely hadn't inherited her body type. But this man, a man that I had never known, looked a little like me. He had my nose, and my mouth, and my face shape. And he looked strangely familiar, like I had seen him before… I shook the idea out of my head. I couldn't have met him before. He had died before I was even born. He was the reason my Mom was always upset.

The bathroom door clicked open, and my Mom walked into the room, wiping her eyes. I gasped, and pushed the photos behind me quickly. She frowned, her eyebrows pulling together.

"Holly?" she asked. "What have you got?"

"Some pictures I drew," I said hurriedly. "I don't want you to see them until they're finished." She watched me carefully as I spoke, and she was silent for a moment once I had finished.

"Holly." She murmured quietly. "I can tell you're lying. What have you got behind your back? Show me."

"It's nothing!" I cried, pulling the three photographs into my hands. "I need the bathroom," I started to walk towards the bathroom, but before I got there, Mom span me round, and snatched the pieces of paper out of my hands. She looked at them, and her face turned even whiter than usual.

"Where did you get these?" her voice was low and quiet, but shaking with anger. I took a couple of steps backward. "Holly, did you look through my purse?" I was silent. "Why would you do that?" her eyes looked hurt, and she glanced down at the photo on top- the one of her and my Dad- and looked back at me again. I was silent. "Holly. Why would you do that?" she repeated.

"Because I'm sick of not knowing anything! All we do is move around from place to place, and you don't even tell me why, why we can't stay in one place for more than two weeks, and you didn't even tell me I had a family. You always tell me what to do, where to go. You tell me I'm making mistakes; you don't let me figure them out for myself. And I can never go out, we have to stay inside all the time, but I love the outside Mom." I had started to scream now, my words coming out in hysterical bursts. "I want to go home. But I don't even have one. Why are we here Mom? Why can't we just have stayed in Mississippi?"

"It's complicated," she whispered.

"It is now we've moved so much!" I yelled. "I don't know any of the people in those pictures. But they all know I exist, don't they? Surely they wouldn't mind seeing me? Because I want to meet them Mom, I want to meet people who can love me, not just you. I want people who can be happy around me." I broke of, gasping for air, and watched my mother's shocked face. Someone banged on the wall.

I looked at my mother's flawless face, clean except for the tiny scar on her forehead.

"What happened to you and that girl in those photos?" I was whispering now, as if shouting had tired my voice out. "Why were you covered in cuts? Who had hurt you?"

"It was a long time ago," she murmured. "It doesn't matter anymore. She turned away, and I dropped my head to study the floor.

"Can't we go back? Can't we see them again?"

"No, Holly. I can't take you back there."

"Why not? What happened?"

"Because he will find us!" she shouted, and then covered her mouth with her hand, as if she had said too much.

"Who?" I breathed. "Who will find us?"

"No one," she snapped. I grabbed the photos off her, and flicked through them again.

"Can you tell me who they are?" I asked. "The people in these photos?" She sighed, and nodded; seeming pleased the conversation was going a different way.  
She picked up the first picture and smiled.

"That's Edward and Bella," she told me, her tone so much more gentle now. "Edward is your uncle. Bella… she was one of my best friends, even though she was so much younger than me. We went through a lot together. It killed me when she left."  
"Why did she leave?" I asked.

"Her Dad got a new job, and he wanted her to live in a small town rather than a big city. Which is a shame, because Bella loved the city." I looked at the cuts across Bella's face, and knew there was more to why the girl left. But I didn't press her. She picked up the next photo.

"At the front are Bella and Edward again. The blonde girl is Rosalie, she's Edward's sister, your aunt. Next to her is her boyfriend, Emmett. I wonder if they're still going out… Next to them is Carlisle and Esme. Your grandparents." I grinned. They looked way to young to me grandparents.

She let the photo flutter down to the bed, and picked up the last one. She stared at it for a second, and then a tear rolled down her face.

"Jasper," she whispered, as though she had forgotten I was there. She dropped the picture quickly, and turned back to me, wiping the tear away with the flats of her fingers. "I miss them," she said quietly.

"I want to meet them," I said. She closed her eyes.

"You can't," she said.

"Please Mom. Please. They're my family. I want to meet them." She stared at the photos for a few moments, her eyes misting over.

"Not at the moment, it's not right," she whispered to herself. She carried on looking at the photos, and in the end, I left to go to the bathroom, leaving her with her memories.

**A/N: **

**So it's a little longer than I said it was going to be until I updated, but I had exams, and I went to Paris on Monday, so I've been exhausted all week! I finish school tomorrow, so hopefully there will be quicker updates for two weeks while I'm off :) So there was some more information about what's going on in that chapter, because we had more of Alice and Jasper's POV. Alice has cut her hair, and changed her surname to Cullen (lol) and Emmett has a daughter!! Aw I love writing Holly POV, but I'm not sure how much of it there will be… I'm sorry about all the skipping POV by the way, but there are so many different sides to this story!! **

**There will be some unexpected people in the next chapter :) Thank you for all the reviews by the way, I feel so honoured :) Over 700 reviews XD I love you all so much! **


	33. I Missed You

**Happiness is just outside my window  
Would it crash blowing 80-miles an hour?  
Or is happiness a little more like knocking  
On your door, and you just let it in?**

Happiness feels a lot like sorrow  
Let it be, you can't make it come or go  
But you are gone- not for good but for now  
Gone for now feels a lot like gone for good

**Happiness- The Fray**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight yadayadayada**

I missed you

Holly was fast asleep next to me, her head lolling onto my shoulder. I watched out the taxi window. I didn't know why I was doing this. I wasn't just putting myself and Holly in danger this time. I was bringing more and more people into my terrifying life. I groaned, and the driver glanced back at us. Holly stirred on my shoulder, and I stroked her hair a little.

"Mom where are we going?" she murmured for the fifth time that journey.

"You'll see sweetie, you'll see," I said gently, and she closed her eyes again. The taxi driver waited until he was certain she was asleep until he spoke to me.

"You got a surprise planned for her? Because Forks isn't exactly the most interesting place on earth. Where are you coming from?"

"Albuquerque," I told him. He gave a low whistle.

"That's a long way, just to go to Forks. You moving there or something?"

"No, we won't be staying there for long,"

"You got family there?"

"Kind of…" I said, closing the question, and hoping he wouldn't ask anymore. He didn't.

I knew this was stupid. Bella might not even live in Forks anymore. They could have moved away, or she could have gone to live with her Mom in Phoenix-she hated the rain- and she probably would have forgotten all about me anyway. I mean, she was five when I last saw her. She was fifteen now. But I was hoping she would still be there, maybe even Emmett would be with her, even though he was way too old to be living with Charlie now.

But I was pulling her into the whole James thing again. I was risking her life, just so I could feel better, and Holly could meet someone from my childhood. I couldn't take her to see any of our family; that would be like taking her straight to James. I shuddered, and Holly, feeling the movement, mumbled a little on my shoulder. I bit my lip. Why was I taking Bella the life that Holly and I had, constantly running from James.

I rested my head against the cool glass of the window, watching the rain rush down in sheets. It was meant to be summer, and yet it was raining so bad that the car's windscreen wipers were going at full speed. I didn't know if I could do this, if I could just see Bella, and then leave again, leave her behind like she had been the whole time I knew her.

**Bella POV**

Jake's arm was slung loosely round my shoulder, and I took his warm hand in mine, stroking the soft lines that ran across it. I wasn't really watching the TV, it was some game that Jacob had put on, and I wasn't interested in it. I was only interested in the warm body that was sat next to me, snoring gently. I giggled, and ran my hand through his short hair. I couldn't believe he had cut it, but it suited him. Kind of.

I watched his long eyelashes flicker against his cheeks, and he murmured something in his sleep. It sounded a lot like my name. I grinned.

I wondered if Edward had never stopped liking me, if we'd be like this now, me curled up in his arms. I groaned, and buried my face into Jacob's chest. I cursed myself quietly. Why the hell was I still thinking of Edward, that had ended almost eleven years ago now. I didn't even know what he looked like anymore, the last time I saw him was when he was eight, at Rose and Em's wedding, and he completely ignored me.

_But you ignored him too… _A voice in my head said quietly. I closed my eyes, wishing for the bad memories to go away. But his voice echoed around in my head, like it had done for so long. I slipped out of Jacob's hold, but he stayed asleep, and I walked out of the room, looking back for a couple of seconds to watch his arm drop beside him. I wiped away a few stray tears angrily, they shouldn't even be there. I was fed up that my life was made up of people leaving me. Jake was the only one who had stayed with me through everything. I _loved _him. And he loved me. We worked out that it was the romantic kind of love last year. And he'd been the best boyfriend ever since. So why couldn't I get Edward out of my head?

I wanted to call Alice, which is what I would have done if I was feeling this way when I was five. But she had left. And she hadn't even taken her bloody cell phone with her, so no one could ever tell her about Jasper. I hadn't seen him since the wedding either, he was still searching. I don't know how he coped, always putting his life on hold, always looking for the person who could complete him. I didn't know if Jacob was _the one_, but he was perfect for now, always looking after me, and making sure I was happy.

"Bella?" Jacob called, his voice worried.

"I'm here," I said quietly, knowing he would hear me. That boy had amazing hearing. He walked into the room, and saw the tears running down my face. He ran to me, and pulled me into his arms.

"What's happened?" he asked quickly.

"Nothing," I whispered. "I… I just miss Alice that's all." I watched his face fall. He hated that Alice took up such a huge part of my life; that she was always there in my thoughts. He always wanted to come first, and had always insisted that he didn't like Alice, even though he had never met her. "Forget it," I snapped. "I'll call Emmett; at least he'll get it. You really don't care do you? You're being childish." I don't know what had made me snap, but I stomped out of the kitchen, leaving Jacob behind, a hurt expression spreading across his face.

"Bells…" he called after me, but I ignored him, grabbing the phone and storming off to my room. Emmett answered on the first ring.

"Em, I miss Alice," I sobbed down the phone.

"Shush Bella, shush," he soothed. "Did you and Jacob have a fight again?"

"Kind of…" I mumbled. "He gets angry when I talk about Alice,"

"I talked to Jazz a couple of days ago. He was in Albuquerque,"

"You did? Has he found anything?"

"No. Nothing. I miss her too Bella, but that's not going to bring her back. Surely you can barely remember her now…"

"Of course I can remember her!" I snapped. "She was my best friend,"

"Okay, okay. You remember. But her not being here doesn't mean you have to get angry at the people you do have. See you Bella." He hung up, and I gaped at the phone, before throwing it across the room. I sat in silence for a minute, tears rushing down my cheeks. "I miss you Emmy," I whispered, and then carefully opened the door. As I expected, Jacob was waiting outside.

He didn't say anything, just kissed each of my tear stained cheeks and slung his arm around my waist and wouldn't let go, so that we had to walk down the stairs sideways. We shuffled back to the sofa again, and both fell onto it, giggling.

"I'm sorry," I murmured, nestling into him. He kissed my hair.

The doorbell rang, and I wriggled out of Jake's hold to go and answer it. The door swung open, and I stared at the people waiting there for a minute. A girl about ten was the one who caught my eye first. Her eyelids were drooping over bright blue eyes, and she had long dark hair down to her waist. She was looking at me, a little confused.

"I'm sorry, this was stupid," the woman next to her said quickly, and her eyes met mine before she walked down the stairs.

"Alice?" I gasped. "Alice? Is that really you?" The woman turned and smiled at me a little. I screamed. "Alice!" I yelled, jumping down the steps and throwing my arms around her. "Holy crap, you're here! Shit!"

"Bella!" Alice laughed. "I missed you sweetie!" I looked at the girl staring up at me, her blue eyes- Alice's eyes- confused.

"Holly!" I shrieked. "This is Holly? It's nice to meet you!" I held my hand out, and she shook it. I hugged her, and screamed again.

"Bella, are you okay?" Jacob gasped, running to the door.

"I'm more than okay!" I grinned at him. "Jake, this is Alice. Alice, Jacob."  
"Hey! So you're the wolf boy?" Alice smiled.

"Wolf boy?" Both of us asked simultaneously.

"Oh… I guess neither of you remember that…" she smirked.

"Mom, who are they?" Holly whispered, clutching Alice's hand.

"Oh, I'm Bella; I'm your uncle's sister!" I chirped. I didn't want to add on that I was also her Mom's best friend. I wasn't sure if I still was.

"Uncle?" Alice asked quizzically.

"Rose and Emmett got married," I told her. "They have a four year old daughter called Cassie now,"

"No way!" she gasped. "That's amazing!"

"I'm Jacob," he sounded a little testy and I glared at him. "I'm Bella's boyfriend." Alice waggled her eyebrows at me. I stuck my tongue out at her.

"So, you haven't been to Mississippi?" I asked. Had she found out that Jasper was alive yet? Is that why she was back?

"Bella, you know I can't go back there," her voice was low, and she glanced at Holly, who looked like she was about to fall asleep on the spot.

"Why?" I asked. "Why did you just leave?"

"Did Emmett not tell you?" she frowned, and I shook my head slowly. "_He _is after me and Holly," she whispered quickly. "He's been following us for the last ten years. He'll get us straight away if we go home."

"James?" my voice was hoarse and croaky, I could barely speak. "Oh crap. Oh crap."

"Who's James?" Jacob asked. Alice rolled her eyes and grabbed my arm.

"Bella, that's why I haven't been to see you, I didn't want James to find you. And that's why I have to leave again. So he never does."

"NO!" I shouted. She couldn't go! I had to get Jasper here, and fast. "Stay! Just for a few days. Please Alice, please." She looked at me with her sad eyes, and I realised how much Alice had changed. How everything had affected her. "I…I just need to finish off a phone call." I started to walk inside. "Keep her here," I growled in Jacob's ear as I rushed through the door.

I ran up to my room and started to search through the debris for the phone I had thrown across the room. I found it, and searched through the contacts until I found Emmett's cell. It rang for a while before he picked it up.

"Are you more cheerful now?" he asked dubiously.

"Emmett, you have to call Jasper, now! Tell him to come to Forks. Alice is here!"

"What?" he gasped.

"Just do it!" I yelled. My only hope was that Jasper could get here within a day. It was the only way he could stop Alice from leaving again.

"Have you told her about Jazz?" he asked.

"Em," I whispered. "How do I even explain it to her, I don't even remember it that well! Just get Jasper down here to do the explaining!"

**Jasper POV**

My phone rang. Emmett again.

"Hello?"

"Get your ass down to Forks right now Agent Jasper, I have a lead!"

"What?"

"Alice! She's in Forks with Bella idiot!"

"What?" I repeated.

"Jazz, get on the first plane over there! Now! I don't know how long she's staying for! I'm driving to the airport now, and Edward's on vacation with Maggie, they're visiting her cousins or something, and he's only in Idaho, so he can get there quicker than any of us, I'm going to call him after you. Go Jasper, go!"

He hung up. I grinned.

**A/N:**

**There was a point where I wasn't sure how long this chapter was going to be up for. My laptop broke, but my Dad fixed it, and everything's fine now :) It's almost Christmas, might have one update before, I think :D Has anyone else got snow?? I got a day off school on Friday because of it (my bus didn't turn up and my mum couldn't take me, I figured that was a good enough reason not to go), so the holidays came one day early :D I might be going sledging tomorrow with some friends, if it doesn't rain and ruin it all :( **

**Thank you all the people who are reviewing :) **


	34. Fights

**Where were you, when everything was falling ****apart?  
All my days were spent by the telephone that never rang  
And all I needed was a call that never came  
To the corner of 1st and Amistad.**

Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me  
Lying on the floor, surrounded, surrounded  
Why'd you have to wait? Where were you? Where were you?  
Just a little late, you found me, you found me.

**You Found Me- The Fray**

**Disclaimer: I really don't own Twilight ): **

Fights

**Alice POV **

"Err, come in I guess," Jacob said slowly. I smiled at him, and walked past him in the hallway. I grinned when I saw every single one of Bella's school photos lined up on the mantelpiece. One of the ones near the front, the one from a time where I had known her, stood out to me the most. I picked it up.

"She's changed so much," I whispered. "But she's still as beautiful,"

"Yeah, she is," Jacob agreed. I smiled. I knew he was good for her, helping her through everything that had happened.

Bella skipped down the stairs, her long hair swinging behind her. I took in the sweats she was wearing, and giggled a little.

"What?" she asked.

"It's a change from all the pink dresses you used to wear, that's all," She pulled a face at me. Holly leant into me, and her eyes closed for a few seconds. "I think Holly needs to sleep. Is that okay?" Bella nodded, and guided us up the stairs, into her room. I placed Holly on the bed, and looked around. There were pictures of her and Jacob, and a couple of people I didn't know, all of them pulling a face at the camera. Several battered classics stood on the bookshelf.

"I missed you Bella. So much," I whispered. Bella walked towards me and hugged me again. She was taller than me now, which felt strange.

"I missed you too," she breathed against my head. She let go of me, and looked at Holly. "She looks like you," she murmured. I shook my head.

"More like Ja… her Dad I think," Bella smiled weakly at me.

"It'll turn out okay Ali, I promise."  
"You can't promise that Bells," I sighed, and left the room.

"How long are you here for?" Jacob asked when I walked into the living room.

"Not long. I have to leave soon. I just wanted to see Bella. I missed her, a lot."

"Doesn't seem like it, if you took this long," he muttered. I turned around and glared at him.

"What is your problem?" I snapped. "Bella isn't yours, she can think for herself." He scowled at me.

Bella walked into the room. She looked between both of us.

"Jacob. Come with me," she growled. He glared at me, and slammed the door behind him. I sighed, and flopped down onto the couch. I heard a key in the front door, and then footsteps in the hall. Charlie walked into the living room, staring at the ceiling, from which a lot of shouting was coming from.

"Hey Charlie!" I said happily. He jumped about three foot in the air and gasped.

"Alice Brandon?" he stared at me, as if he were seeing things. "Is that really you Alice?" I nodded. He grinned. "I guess that's what they're fighting about then," he gestured to the ceiling.

"Jacob… Doesn't seem to want me here," I said slowly.

"Don't worry about that, he gets a little overprotective," Charlie laughed. "He has problems with Bella's school friends as well. I guess he's been her friend… well, boyfriend now, for too long. He doesn't want anything to come between them."

"I guess that's understandable," I reasoned.

"They always fight anyway. Where's Holly?" he asked.

"Upstairs asleep. She's had a rough day."

"I'll bet she has. Well, Alice, it's been a long time. Do you want something to eat, something to drink?"

"I'll have water please," I told him. We'd eaten on the way in.

"Yeah, it's probably not wise to ask me to cook anyway," he grinned. Bella stomped back into the room again, and sat down next to me on the couch.

"Idiot," she muttered.

"Bella?" I asked, yawning. "Do you mind if I have a sleep too? I haven't slept in… ages.." She laughed.

"You'll have to share a bed with Holly is that okay?" I nodded. I was too tired to even care what my sleeping conditions were. As soon as I lay down on the bed I was asleep.

***

I sat up sharply when the doorbell rang. Bella better not of called anyone… I didn't want them involved with my stupid life. I tiptoed out of the room, not caring that my hair was all over the place, and peered down the stairs. Bella ran to open the door. I walked down the stairs, and she turned to grin at me as she pulled it open.

A boy about the same age as Bella stood there, his bronze hair sticking out in all directions. A girl clung onto his arm; she was small with bouncy red curls and a huge grin.

"Bella." He whispered.

"Yes?" she asked. I walked forwards to see the genuine confusion in her eyes. I turned to look at the boy, and his emerald eyes met mine. I gasped. There was only one person I knew that had those colour eyes.

"Edward!" I shrieked, pulling him into my arms.

"Alice." He chuckled, squeezing me.

"Jesus, you've changed more than Bella," I laughed.

"Edward." Bella whimpered. I turned around and she was gone.

"One second," I told him, following her into the living room.

Bella's face was pressed up against Jacob's chest, her arms wound tightly around his waist.

"No, no, no, no, no, no." I could hear her murmuring. Jacob was trying to unclasp her from him, making for the front door.

"Who is it? What's the matter with her?" he growled.

"Bella, you're being stupid, calm down," I snapped. She span around and glared at me.

"_I'm _being stupid? You're the one who just leaves, without a trace, without letting anyone know where you are! We searched for years for you and Holly, we never found you!" her voice was getting higher and higher, turning into hysterical gasps. "And now because of you, _he _is at my front door."

"Bella, you know why I left!" I shouted. "James was going to try and hurt me and Holly! So forgive me for not leaving a forwarding address!"

Someone cleared their throat. We both span around. Edward was standing in the doorway, the girl still hanging on his arm, her eyes wide. I wondered who she was. Was she his girlfriend?

"How are you Edward?" I asked, running forwards to hug him again. I heard a squeak, and I turned to see Jacob push Bella behind him.

"You're Edward?" he snarled. "You're the dick who left Bella upset for… for years?"

"Shut up Jacob," I snapped, but he ignored me.

"Jake, stop," Bella said softly, touching his arm. She changed her tone into one much fiercer. "Go away Edward. No one wants you here." I watched his face spasm in pain, and I immediately felt protective of him.

"I want him here!" I protested. He smiled faintly at me.

"And no offense Bella, but he's here to see Alice, not you," the little girl piped up.

"Who the hell are you?" Bella asked.

"I'm Maggie," she grinned.

"Maggie!" I exclaimed. "I remember you!" She smiled at me.

"Do you think he's not going to dump you, just suddenly stop loving you? Because he will do that, he's a dickhead." Bella snarled.

"Bella!" I scolded. "What is up with you?"

"I'm not his girlfriend," Maggie laughed. "Eww that would be like…incest. So wrong." Bella glared at her.

"Have you told her?" Edward asked Bella, his voice cold. She shook her head.  
"I'm waiting for him to tell her," she muttered. She grabbed Jacob's arm and tugged him out the room, and I thought I heard her sob when she walked through the door.

"I'm sorry about that Edward," I said quietly. He shook his head.

"It's my fault," he murmured. "I shouldn't have come. I just… I just had to see you."

"She called Emmett didn't she?" I growled. He nodded.

"Mags and I got here as soon as we could."

"You have no idea how excited he's been to see you," Maggie laughed. "It was like he was five all over again!" I grinned, looking Edward up and down.

"You sure look a lot different to when you were five. You're tall now. Very tall."

"Na, I'm average," he chuckled. "You were always the midget." I mock punched him.

"Mom? Why is everyone shouting? And who are you?" Holly stood in the doorway, one hand rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, the other pointing at Edward and Maggie.

"Holly?" Edward gasped. "Oh my god."

"Holly, this is your Uncle Edward," I laughed. Holly smiled shyly.

"Err, Edward? Shall we go for a walk, just while those two calm down?" Edward agreed, and we started to walk around Forks, umbrellas in hands, raincoat hoods pulled over our heads. Holly had taken an immediate shine to Maggie, and they were walking along ahead, chattering to each other.

"How's Cynthia?" I asked.

"Good, she's a junior now. She got a boyfriend last week,"

"A boyfriend…" I breathed. In my head, Cynthia was still only seven, and listening to High School Musical and playing with Barbie dolls. "And how's everyone else?"

"Rose and Emmett got married, you've probably heard about that, and they've got little Cassie now as well, she's lovely. Kate got married to Garrett, and they have twin boys, Alex and Jamie, you probably don't want to meet them, they're six and they scare the living daylights out of me, I know your sister freaks out when she has to babysit them. Your friend Angela, she moved in next door a couple of years ago once she had finished college, she and Ben are still together, but not married or anything yet."

"Woah. Everything's changed so much since I left." Edward took my hand and squeezed it. Suddenly, a car sped past us, and then stopped suddenly, the brakes squealing. I turned to see someone jump out the car, and I automatically turned back to Holly to check she was alright. She suddenly started waving madly to the person who had gotten out the car.

"Hi Jasper!" she shouted. "My knee's all better now!" I looked at the car again, and took several feet back.

"Alice," Jasper grinned. "I missed you, so much."

"Holy shit!" I screamed. "Jazz, you're a ghost!" Edward suddenly burst into hysterical laughter.

"Ummm, you said a bad word Mom!" Holly whispered.

I stared at Jasper, who looked as though he had just won the lottery. What the hell?

**A/N: **

**Bwahaha another cliff-hanger :) Wow, an update in a day, I haven't done that for ages! I'm proud of myself :) I might be able to do it tomorrow; I'm only going out in the evening, but obviously Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, not going to happen. Then there may be an update Boxing Day, but afterwards I'm going up to Somerset, so there'll be nothing then! **

**I've had some lovely reviews for the last chapter, so thanks everyone that reviewed, you're all amazing, and I will send you all some chocolate Santas* (:**

***If the Santas don't turn up, it's not my fault. **


	35. Happiness Can Vanish in a Second

**When these pillars get pulled down,  
It will be you who wears the crown,  
And I'll owe everything to you**

How much pain has cracked your soul?  
How much love would make you whole?  
You're my guiding lightning strike

I can't find the words to say,  
But they're overdue,  
I've traveled half the world to say,  
I belong to you

**I Belong to You- Muse**

Happiness Can Vanish in a Second

**Alice POV**

"Jasper?" I whispered. "What? I mean… what?"

"Alice," he repeated, grinning. He ran towards me and swept me up in his arms, kissing my lips. I whimpered a little, before kissing him back, as hard as I could. I didn't know if he was real or not, but I didn't want him to disappear. He tried to pull away, but I grabbed hold of his hair, pulling his face back to mine.

"Don't leave me," I moaned quietly, before kissing his soft lips millions of times, over and over.

"I'll never leave you again Ali," he said gently, wrapping his arms around me. "Not even for a second. I promise."

"How. Are. You. Here?" I asked, in between each kiss. "You're. Dead." I pulled back to stare into his deep blue eyes. "They told me you were dead!" I ran my hands through his blonde hair; it was so much longer than when I had last seen him, when it was all shaved off.

"They thought I was dead," he told me, kissing my lips again, soft, sweet kisses that made me melt inside. "I managed to get out. I'll explain more later. I just want to be with you for now. Forever."

"I love you," I murmured against his skin, and he chuckled.

"I love you too. I thought… I thought I might not ever find you,"

"Mom?" Holly's voice was tiny, and I turned to look at her, unable to wipe the huge grin off my face. "Is that… Is that my Dad?" I turned back to Jasper, and smiled at him.

"Holly?" he gasped, before running towards her and picking her up, twirling her around in the air. "You're Holly? Damn, I'm so stupid!"  
"_That _Jasper is my Dad?" Holly gasped as he set her down, swaying a little. "My Dad is dead!"

"You! It was you who put the band-aid on her?" I breathed. "You were that close, and I didn't realize?" He walked towards me and hugged me again, and I breathed in his soft scent, one I hadn't smelt in years. I stood on tiptoe to kiss his mouth again, and I burst into tears.

"Alice?" Jasper suddenly sounded worried. "Are you okay?"  
"I'm… I'm fine. They're happy tears! But then I'm scared at the same time. What if you aren't real? What if it's just me, being stupid?" He stared at me, his beautiful eyes analyzing me. He bent down, and kissed me again.

"Do I feel real?" he asked. I nodded. "Then maybe I am. And you, stupid? I don't think so." I sobbed into his warm chest, and he rubbed circles on my back. I felt someone's arms around my waist, and looked to see Holly holding on to me, her head on my shoulder. I was with my family. I smiled.

Edward chuckled.

"Hey Jasper!" he waved.

"You knew?" I hissed. "You knew and didn't tell me?" He put his hands up.

"Sorry Alice. We thought it was better this way. We didn't want you making out with any of us did we?" I stuck my tongue out at him, turning back to Jasper again. It was strange how he had changed, but was still the same Jazz I had always known. Everything had just matured a bit.

"Mom?" Holly asked quietly. I turned to look at her. "Does this mean we don't have to change where we live all the time?" I bit my lip, and looked at Jasper. James could still get us. All of us. I didn't know what our situation was now Jazz was here.

"We'll work something out," he whispered in my ear and bent down to touch his mouth to mine again. "I don't care what we do, as long as it's best for us. All of us."  
"I'm wet," Holly whimpered. I looked at her, taking in her sodden clothes and hair. I realized we had been standing in the rain, umbrellas abandoned, for over five minutes now.

"We'll take you back," Jasper said. "Get you dry," She nodded shyly, still scared of this stranger who should have been in her life ten years ago.

The walk home was silent, mainly just Jasper and I staring at each other. I would never have been so gooey when we first met, but we needed to make up for the years lost. My hand was clasped in his, Holly's in mine. I smiled at the thought that when cars drove past, they would know we were a family. Edward and Maggie walked behind us, and every time I dragged my eyes away from Jasper's to look at them, they had huge grins spread all over their faces.

"Your hair has changed," Jasper mused, holding a long strand between his fingers. I shrugged.

"I don't like it. I just… needed to look different,"

"You look beautiful whatever your hair is like," he sighed, tucking it behind my ear.

"You don't know how hard it's been… how much I've cried…" I whispered. He pulled me closer to him.

"I probably do," he breathed in my ear, his soft breath tickling.

"I'm still scared… what if this is a dream? What if I wake up and we're at another stupid hotel, and you died ten years ago?"

"I'm worried it's a dream too," he said gently. "That the call I got from Emmett was all just made up in my head- wishful thinking." I rested my head on his shoulder, which made it rather difficult to walk, but I didn't care.

"We're just going to have to make the most of it aren't we? In case it's not real." He spun me in for another kiss. Holly let go of my other hand, and I heard her make a little disgusted noise. I giggled against Jasper's smooth lips.

"I love you Jasper Whitlock," I murmured.

"I love you Alice Brandon,"

"Actually, it's Alice Cullen at the moment," He pulled back, shocked. I laughed and kissed him again. "I change my name a lot," I told him.

"Thank god for that. I thought you might be married or something…"

"I would never replace you," I stroked his cheek. Edward cleared his throat.

"Shall we carry on walking?" he asked. I nodded, feeling myself blush. Jasper chuckled a little, and Holly caught hold of my hand again.

Forks was so small that we could get to Bella's house quickly, and as soon as we touched the stone path she flung open the door and ran towards us.

"I'm sorry!" she wailed, flinging her arms around me. "I was being stupid, and I was all wound up, and everything is happening so fast and…" I squeezed her.

"It's okay Bells," I said gently. Nothing could put me in a bad mood. She glanced over my shoulder and gasper.

"Jasper!" she exclaimed. "You're here!" She smiled at me. "I'm glad you didn't go before he got here."

"I'm glad too," I laughed, hugging her again.

"I'm sorry Maggie," she said softly. I turned to look at Maggie, and she was grinning.

"It's okay Bella," she chirped sweetly, running forwards to hug her. Bella glanced at Edward and blushed scarlet.

"Sorry Edward," she murmured.

"I'm sorry too Bella," it was barely audible, but both of us managed to hear it, and Bella blushed an even deeper red, something I didn't think was possible.

"Where's Jacob?" I asked. Even if Bella was in a marginally better mood, I wasn't sure if he would be.

"He went home," she told me. "But Emmett called; he'll be here in three hours."

"Really?" I could feel the smile lighting up my face. Did it matter now if more people came? The damage was done. And James wouldn't have found me yet. "Is Rosalie coming too? And Cassie?" Bella nodded.

"You're her godmother," she grinned. "Along with Kate."

"I am?" I shrieked, jumping up and down a little. Jasper chuckled. "Is Kate coming too?" Edward shook his head, and I felt my excitement fade.

"Garrett has to work, and the boys… well, there's no way they can be left with anyone, they'd trash whoever's house it was within seconds. And you have no idea how much trouble they'd be on a plane…"

"They're that bad?" I giggled. Edward nodded, his eyebrows raised.

"They painted Cynthia's car black, with blue spots." Maggie piped up.

"We still have no idea where they got the paint from…" Edward murmured.

"Cynthia and my parents aren't coming either?" I asked, already knowing the answer. It would have been mentioned already. Edward shook his head, something I knew would happen.

"Your Mom and Dad are in Canada on holiday at the moment, they don't know you're here, we can't get through to them. Cynthia is on holiday with friends in Spain, and she can't really get here." I sighed. I thought I didn't like my parents when I left. Now I realized they didn't mean any harm, they were just protecting me. I really wanted to see them, they had funded me through the last ten years, never stopped helping me.

Jasper caught hold of my hand again, and I leant into him, the soft cotton of his shirt brushed my bare arm, and I smiled. Here I was home.

"Err, Alice, Jasper, do you want to be left alone for a while? To explain things?" Bella asked quietly. I nodded, trying to portray in my eyes the gratitude I felt. "Holly, are you hungry? Do you want to go out to the diner?"

"Yes please!" she trilled. I knew she would love getting better acquainted with the family she never knew she had. Bella took her hand, and they left, followed by Edward and Maggie, who both smiled at me before they walked away.

Jasper walked inside, and I followed him, shivering a little from the cold rain. He stopped in the living room, and I almost walked into the back of him.

"Jazz, how are you here?" I asked quietly. "They told me you were dead…"

"It's a long story, you might want to sit down," he told me, and I fell back onto the sofa. He sat next to me, pulling his arm around my shoulder and I snuggled into his chest.

Jasper told me his story, his soft voice pulling me into concentration, so that every word of his explanation was vital. I hated to think of Jasper like that, trapped in a basement for days, whilst everyone thought he was dead. I thought of all the other people in that village, the ones whose lives had been taken, the ones who had lost people they loved, just like I thought I had. Were they crying at the same time as I was, grieving for the losses of their husbands, children, parents and friends? It made me feel that they had lived a worse life than I had, because they'd probably lost more people than I ever would.

What really got to me was the mother of Latif. She knew there would be no life for her outside that house, so she handed her baby over to a total stranger, hoping for a better life for him, away from all the mess she was in. She loved that baby more than anything, and unintentionally, had saved all those soldiers lives as well, including Jasper's. She had gotten them out of that house, so Latif would have survived.

And then there was Zahrah. She had let Jasper shelter in her house, even though it could have cost her life. She gave him her food, although she could have kept it for herself- it would have lasted so much longer.

"What happened to Latif and Zahrah?" I asked, once he had finished.

"Zahrah now looks after Latif, and she moved again, to another village. She knows there is always a risk, living in Afghanistan, and she can't do anything about it. She sends me letters sometimes, to see how I'm doing and whether I've found you yet."

"It's nice that both of them have family now…" I said quietly. Jasper nodded.

The door burst open, and Edward and Maggie ran into the room. Maggie was sobbing hysterically, and Edward had tears dripping down his cheeks.

"What's happened?" I asked, standing up quickly.

"It's Holly and Bella," Edward choked out. "They went outside while we were paying the bill, and when we went to meet them, they were gone." I could feel my breath quickening, and the tears building in my eyes.

"We... we found… this on the floor," Maggie sobbed. She held her hand out, and dropped something into my palm. It was the necklace I had given Holly for her birthday. The chain was snapped, as if someone had pulled on it. And the locket had fallen open, showing the picture of Holly and me inside it.

"No," I was sobbing now. "He can't have gotten her. He can't have. And Bella as well… No!" Jasper was suddenly in front of me, his face shocked, and his arms wrapped around me.

"We'll find her Alice," he growled.

"You couldn't find me," I whimpered, my voice tiny. "What if it's the same for her? Oh, I knew I shouldn't have come here. And I shouldn't have left her alone. My baby…" I broke down then, and my knees couldn't hold my weight anymore. Jasper supported me. I looked into his face and saw he was crying too. It made me even more scared.

"It was my fault," Edward's usual smooth voice was hoarse and crackly. "I shouldn't have let them wait outside. I just… wasn't paying attention at the time," I couldn't answer him, tell him this wasn't his fault, it was mine. Holly and Bella were gone. And I wasn't sure how we were going to get them back…

**A/N: **

**I'm sorry! Another cliffie :/ And sorry I took so long to update, I've been so busy, what with Christmas and the New Year (Happy 2010 everyone) and I've been away to see family and stuff, so I've really had no time to write! I am sooo happy, I've had 890 reviews! OMG, it's amazing, I am smiling so much :) Thank you everyone, especially those who've been here right from the start :) XXX**


	36. Hearts Are Hard to Heal

**He isn't coming after all  
Love this time  
She likes the way he sings  
White demon love song's in her dreams**

White demon, where's your selfish kiss?  
White demon sorrow will arrange  
Let's not forget about the fear  
Black invitation to this place that cannot change  
While strangely holy, come for a rain

**A White Demon Love Song- The Killers**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight 'kay? **

Hearts are hard to heal

**Bella POV**

I watched Holly studied her menu carefully, drawing a line with her finger down the page. She dropped it, and looked up at me with her big blue eyes.

"Can I have a cheeseburger, and a…. lemonade?"

"I think I'm going to have the same," Edward murmured, setting down his menu. "But with coke instead."

Silence swept over the table again, and Maggie fidgeted a little in her seat. Well, this was awkward. Cheesy music rattled through the old speakers, and it seemed to make the atmosphere even tenser.

"So, you were in Albuquerque last?" Edward asked Holly. She nodded.

"I liked it there. It was hot," Her eyes flickered to the sheets of rain pounding against the windows. "I don't like the rain much. I like warmer places. Like New Mexico and Arizona." I grinned.

"I come from Arizona," I told her. She raised her eyebrows.

"How do you cope with all the rain here, if you were used to all that heat?" I laughed.

"Well, I lived in Biloxi for a while, with your Mom. We got quite a lot of rain there. I guess it got me prepared for Forks," I stopped and thought about how little of Biloxi I remembered. All that seemed to stick in my mind was that black room, smelly and damp, and freezing in the winter, sweltering hot in the summer. And Edward's five year old face seemed to be imprinted in my mind. I shook the image out of my head. "Plus, I was only a baby when I left Phoenix; I only know it from my visits there to see my Mom really."

"I don't really remember many places I've live either. My favourite place was a town in Illinois; I don't remember what it was called. We stayed in a bed and breakfast, and the lady who owned it had a little girl called Amber, who was the same age as me. We played together a lot. The town was pretty too. But we had to leave there, we always leave." For a second Edward and I forgot everything that had happened between us, and exchanged a glance of pity for this little girl who didn't have a home, or any friends. Then suddenly, we seemed to remember ourselves, and both our eyes dropped to the table.

The waitress came over to ask our order, and then returned with our drinks. I took a sip of my coke, and as I lifted the glass, I saw Edward staring at me. My sharp intake of breath made me choke on my drink, and I spent the next minute coughing. When I was able to breathe again, I took another sip of coke to soothe my scratchy throat. I could feel my cheeks burning. Why was he staring at me like that? Like I was the only important thing in his world? I cursed myself silently. Of course he wasn't thinking that. He never felt the same way I did. We were just kids, who ever expected him to?

"Are you okay?" Holly asked. I nodded.

"It just went down the wrong way," I told her. Edward traced patterns in the old wood table with his long fingers. I remembered how those fingers used to weave up and down the piano, so incredibly.

"Do you still play piano?" I asked, before I even realised what I was doing.

"Yes," he answered, smiling that beautiful crooked smile at me, it looked even more beautiful now he was older, and the contours of his face were more defined and well… gorgeous. I felt like hitting my head on the table, but then he would definitely think I was crazy. I was with Jacob now. Jacob who was sweet and kind to everyone- except Edward, and maybe Alice- and who would always do anything for me.

The table was filled with forced, awkward conversation after that, Holly asking questions, Edward answering them, with me or Maggie sometimes adding a little to what he said.

Our food came, and I started on my steak, at least it gave me something to do. I peeked through my hair at Edward. He was picking at his burger, tearing the bread apart, occasionally eating some fries or a bit of salad. His reddish brown hair shone in the dim spotlights, turning it colours that flipped my stomach over. And suddenly, his emerald eyes flashed up to meet mine. I gasped, and quickly looked back at my meal, picking up a handful of fries and biting into them. They were hot and burnt my mouth and made my eyes water, but I didn't make any noise or indication to show that they were; I was too embarrassed. I reached for my coke and took a huge gulp, trying to soothe my stinging tongue.

"What was Mom like, when you first met her?" Holly asked. "Was she happy, like she is now? She's normally sad, and I sometimes wonder if she ever _was_ happy,"

"When I first met her, your Mom… well, she'd gone through a lot, and she didn't speak. I didn't know her for long when she was like that though. She'd met Jasper just before me, and he fixed her, she began to talk again, and she was happy. For a long time she was happy…" I didn't say anymore. I knew Alice hadn't told Holly about James, and I could understand why. Even if it meant the reason for her life being the way it was would never be told to her. So many bad things happened to Alice, and she didn't deserve them.

"I need the toilet," I said quickly, getting up from my chair, and practically running to the bathroom. Once I had locked myself inside, I pressed my forehead against the cool wall, trying to keep the tears back. I couldn't go back to the table with red puffy eyes, so I had to calm down. Everything had just become so overwhelming. I was so pleased Alice and Holly were here, but Alice being here brought back memories I had tried to keep locked away at the back of my head. And Edward was here, and he was even more handsome than he had been at Rosalie and Emmett's wedding, when he had been in that tux, and had looked so perfect…

"For God's sake Bella," I hissed to myself, banging my head on the wall once. "You have Jacob. Not that Edward would want you anyway," A tear escaped from my eyes, and I brushed it away furiously, sinking to the bathroom floor. I stood up again quickly, and scrutinised my reflection, glad I hadn't worn any make-up, so there were no tell-tale signs of the tear I had let fall. I blinked to get the leftover moisture out of my eyes, and then left the bathroom.

I gasped. Edward was right in front of me, his green eyes glinting in the soft light. I realised quickly that I was pressed up against him in the small space, and it was obvious he did too.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, turning to his side and pushing down the handle of the men's bathroom. He turned back to me again. "No Bella, I really am sorry, for everything,"

"It's okay," I couldn't get my voice above a hoarse whisper. "It happens,"

"It shouldn't have happened to you," his voice was gentle, and I stared upwards at his perfect face, dazzled by his beauty. "You never did anything to deserve it. I was horrible."

"We were just kids Edward, it's not like it meant anything," I watched his face screw up in pain, and then smooth over again. What? Did he… did he really care? Think it meant something? He hadn't loved me, not like I had him… But his facial expression proved otherwise. I groaned inwardly for fantasising. The expression must just have been about something else. Maybe…

"It didn't mean anything to you?" he sounded hurt, and his forehead was furrowed.

"Well… well…" Another tear fell down my cheek, but before I could brush it away with my hand, he got there first. His cool finger touched my cheek, removing the droplet of water from it.

"I'm sorry," he murmured again, and suddenly, his face was moving towards mine. I stood there, frozen in shock. His arms wound themselves around my waist, and I found myself moving my lips up to his, as he leant down… I squeaked, and pulled myself away from him. I couldn't do this. He closed his eyes, and span around quickly, so that I almost lost my balance, and he slammed the bathroom door behind him. I walked back to the table, trying not to burst into tears.

When I got back to Maggie and Holly, all the plates were clean except mine, and the waitress came over to clean them up.

"Oh, Bella's not finished yet," Maggie told her.

"I'm okay, I've had enough," I said quietly. The waitress nodded at me, and scooped my plate up with the others. I threw thirty dollars on the table. "I'm going to wait outside, can you give that to Edward as mine and Holly's share of the meal?" She nodded and smiled.

"You know he won't take it, he'll just give it back. It's not much point giving it to him."  
"Tell him he has to pay with it," I told her. "I don't want him to spend money on me,"

"At least let him pay for Holly," she said gently. "He won't mind, she's his niece. And it makes him feel good to spend money on other people," I sighed, and took away ten dollars from the table.

"Make sure he keeps that," I told her, and she grinned.

"Can I come outside with you?" Holly asked, and I nodded.

The cold wind felt good on my face, and the rain on my umbrella was a comforting sound, one I had grown up with. Holly pulled the hood on her raincoat up and took a step out from under the umbrella, lifting her head to the sky and sticking her tongue out, trying to drink the rain. I laughed, remembering all the times I did that when I was younger. She paddled through the puddles, trying not to get the water in her shoes. And then something in the distance caught my eye. A flash of red hair, flying in the wet wind. I gasped, and took a couple of steps forwards, squinting through the pounding rain.

I span around to look at Holly and I screamed. James stood behind her, grinning, his hand around her neck. She struggled, and he grabbed the necklace around her neck, it snapped, the beads flying over the floor.

"Hello Bella," he sneered.

"Let her go!" I shrieked. "Please, take me, just let her go!"

"But you see, I'd rather have both of you," he laughed, and suddenly my hands were pulled behind my back. I looked over my shoulder to see Victoria holding me, her face hard. I whimpered, and pulled against her restraining hands, but she held me tight. I kicked her in the shin, and she gasped.

"Bitch," she hissed, and slapped me around the face. I cried out in pain, but before anything else could happen, I found myself being pushed towards the white van that sat in the car park.

"MOM!" Holly shouted as loud as she could. She burst into tears.

"EDWARD!" I screamed. Something hit me around the head, and everything disappeared.

**Alice POV**

My face was pressed up against the cold hard wood, my tears dripping onto it, my wailing sobs echoing in my ears. Maggie was on the phone to Charlie, sobbing occasionally. Jasper was kneeling on the floor next to me, stroking my hair, his hot tears sometimes hitting my face and mixing with mine. Edward sat on the sofa, his head in his hands.

"Oh god," I whispered against the floor. "What do I do? Oh, my baby,"

"Charlie's sent some people to find them now, he would go himself, but he's not in a good state at the moment…" Maggie trailed off and collapsed on the couch next to Edward, resting her head on his shoulder and putting her arm around his waist. He stayed frozen, not responding.

Someone knocked on the door, but everybody stayed in the position they were in. The person banged harder and harder, until finally giving up and opening the letterbox.

"Why is everyone ignoring me? I know you're there, everybody's cars are outside! It's me Emmett! Hello?"

"Emmett," I whispered. I watched Jasper get up and walk away from me.

"What's going on?" Emmett boomed, as soon as the door opened. "What's the matter Jazz? Where's Alice?" He ran into the room, and as soon as he saw me, he froze.

"Alice?" he bent down next to me. "What's happened?"

"Holly… Bella…" I breathed against the floor.

"They got taken…" Maggie sobbed from the couch.

"No… not again," Emmett's face collapsed in on itself, and a tear dripped down his cheek. "Not Bells, please… Say you're joking," I shook my head, and he buried his face in his hands.

"No, no, no, no. Not Bells. Not again," he repeated. I pushed myself off the floor, and carefully wrapped my arms around Emmett's neck. He pulled me into a hug, crying against my shoulder, as I cried against his. Rosalie walked into the room, a little girl sleeping in her arms, and looked around the room. Jasper followed her, tears pouring down his face. Rosalie was crying too. She sat on the couch next to Edward, stroking his hand, while the little girl in her arms looked confused.

Jasper sat down beside Emmett and me and rested his head against my arm.

"Why?" I whispered to him. "Why does all this have to happen to us Jazz? Can we not ever be happy?" I unhooked one of my arms from around Emmett's neck, and picked up Jasper's hand. I don't know how long we sat there for, but it felt like eternity.

**A/N: **

**:( Well that made me depressed! Thank you KerryKerry92 who gave me the idea for the Bella POV, you made this chapter happen x :)**

** So, I've only had one day at school this week, because Monday I had a power cut, and on Tuesday night the snow started, so school was closed :) Theoretically, that means I should have finished this chapter waay quicker. But most days I've been out in the snow until dark, and then afterwards I've been going back to friends' houses, so I haven't really had time to write much. But yeah, I'm going back to school on Monday, so there won't be many updates from me unfortunately :( Thanks for reviewing :) lol, I published this with a half finished A/N, which was pretty funny, have to redo it now!**


	37. Punished

**Maybe if my heart stops beating  
it wont hurt this much  
and never will I have to  
answer again to anyone**

Please don't get me wrong  
Because I'll never let this go  
But I can't find the words to tell you  
I don't want to be alone

**Never Let This Go—Paramore (I loovve them so much!)**

**Disclaimer: There is NO WAY I own Twilight :P **

37. Punished

I wasn't sure how I had gotten to Bella's bed, but I woke up there. Jasper's arms were wrapped around me, and he was snoring softly. I wriggled out of his grasp, and turned to look at his face. The tracks of his tears lingered there, so I guessed he hadn't been asleep for long. I ran my fingers down the wet lines. I wasn't even sure how long _I_ had been asleep for. I wasn't keeping track of time; all I knew was that each second without Holly stabbed me in the heart.

I breathed in the smell of Bella's sheets, the soft strawberry scent that I had noticed she smelled of when I had hugged her. Something hard was digging into my palm, and I unclenched my fist. Holly's locket was still there from where Maggie had given it to me earlier. It brought on fresh tears to see her perfect little face grinning up at me. My cell phone vibrated on the bedside table next to me, and I ignored it.

Someone mumbled a little from the floor next to the bed, and I jumped. I peered over the edge of it, and stared at the little girl that lay on a blow up mattress, limbs tangled around the covers. I remembered she was the girl in Rosalie's arms earlier. My goddaughter. Cassie. I slid out of the bed, and sat next to her, stroking her smooth cheek. She looked a lot like Holly had when she was her age, with her dark hair and pale skin. It hurt to look at her, to see features that were the same as Holly's. She moaned, and sat up, breathing fast and looking around wildly.

"I had a nightmare!" she whimpered, clambering onto my lap. "A bad one!" She was sobbing, so I took her out of the room so as not to wake Jasper, and into the little bathroom. I sat her on the edge of the bath and wiped her tears away. "You're the lady Unca Jasper looks for," she said matter-of-factly. "Mommy told me," I nodded. "Do you have nightmares?" she asked.

"All the time," I whispered, hugging her. "What was your one about?"

"Monsters," she breathed in my ear. "And Daddy wasn't there to scare them away." She burst into tears again at the memory. I squeezed her tightly.

"Hey, don't cry sweetie. It was only a dream." But I was crying as well, and she leant back and wiped the tears away.

"Are you scared of the monsters too?" Her brow was furrowed, leftover tears still making their journey down her face.

"Yes, I suppose," I whispered. "But a different kind of monster to yours,"

"They're mean," she sighed, hugging me again. "Can I go back to bed now? I'm tired," I nodded, picking her up and taking her back into the bedroom. Jasper was snoring softly and she giggled. "Unca Jasper's got the snores!" she laughed in my ear, and I grinned at her, laying her back down on the blow up mattress, and pulling the covers over her. I kissed her hair.

"Make sure Daddy scares them away this time," I said gently. "He's good at scaring bad things away," She nodded seriously.

"He scares the spiders on the wall away," she shivered. "I hate spiders." I smiled weakly, stroking her hair, and she closed her eyes. Her breathing evened out in a matter of minutes, and I knew she was asleep. I clambered back onto the bed next to Jasper, pressing myself against his warm body, feeling his soft breath tickle my ear.

"How are we going to get them back?" I whispered softly to myself, and twisted myself around, so I was sobbing quietly into Jasper's cotton shirt.

I sighed as my phone buzzed again, sitting up and brushing away the tears. I picked it up and glared at the caller ID. It wasn't a number I recognized.

"Hello?" I answered quietly, carefully walking out of the room and shutting the door behind me so as not to wake Jasper and Cassie.

"Mommy!" a tiny voice whimpered. Someone laughed harshly in the background.

"Holly!" I gasped. "Where are you sweetie? Are you okay, are you hurt? Where's Bella?"

"He told me to tell you to get somewhere nowhere to see you, or hear you. Or he'll hurt me." Her voice was small and frightened, and I walked into the bathroom, gasping for breath.

"Holly, are you okay?"

"No…" she whispered, and then gasped. "Ouch…" she whimpered. I leant against the wall for support.

"I'm going to get you out of there!" I sobbed. "I promise! I will find you! I love you, so much."

"I love you too Mom. He says he wants to speak to you," there was a crackling, and a whimper, and someone laughed down the phone.

"Hello Alice, long time no speak. Its okay, I haven't hurt your friend or your little girl… well, not seriously anyway. I need you to do as I tell you, or you may find you don't have a daughter anymore. See, I'm willing to do a trade. Bella and Holly can go home, as long as you come here. I need you far more than I need them."

"But why do you need me?" I whispered down the phone. "Why me? Why have you followed me for so long?"

"Oh, you'll find out…eventually. So, are you willing to trade me?"

"Yes," my voice was hoarse. "I'll do anything. Just… let them go. Please."  
"You have to come here first. I'll give you the address, but if you tell anyone, these kids are dead before anyone comes into the building. Understand?"  
"Yes," I whispered desperately.

"We're in a warehouse just north of Port Angeles. Number 5, Hartree Road. Can you get there without anyone following you?"

"Of course," I stammered.

"Good. I'll see you soon Alice," He hung up, but not before I heard a terrified, muffled squeal. I carefully tiptoed back into Bella's room. I kissed Jasper's sweet lips, softly so as not to wake him, and then bent down to kiss Cassie's forehead. I typed _I love you _as a message on my phone, saved it, and then left it on the bedside table.

I crept through the house, but everything was silent, no one had woken yet. I could hear Emmett's snores in the living room.

There was a notepad and pen on a table by the door. _Jasper, I love you. I have to get her home, even if it means I will never see you again. Look after her. A x _I scrawled on it quickly, before stuffing the piece of paper in one of the drawers.

The drive to Port Angeles seemed way to long, and the taxi driver was driving at exactly the speed limit. I tapped my foot impatiently. My little girl and my best friend were getting hurt, and he was humming along to the music rattling out of the speakers. He sometimes glanced back at me, staring at my tear stained face and my crumpled, slept in clothes.

"Are you okay?" he asked eventually, when we were stopped at a light, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.

"I'm fine," I replied, although my voice was hoarse and scratchy, so he raised his eyebrows.

"You sure you don't want to go home? How old are you? Sixteen?"

"I'm twenty-seven." I snapped. He looked back at the road as the lights turned green, embarrassed.

We finally reached the street of old dilapidated warehouses, and my hands tightened around Holly's locket.

"Are you sure this is the right place?" the taxi driver asked me and I nodded, shaking a little.

"This is where I'm meant to be," I told him, passing him some money. "Keep the change.

The warehouse was dark, and smelled of damp, it was obvious it hadn't been used for years.

"Hello?" I called out. I was fearless now. He couldn't do anything to me except hurt Holly, and she was going home now. Nothing could hurt me anymore. Someone laughed in the distance. "Holly? Bells?" I called, running towards the sound. "I'm coming," I tripped a little on the uneven ground, but I didn't slow down, running as fast as I could. Suddenly, James' face was right in front on mine, I could smell his rancid breath, and I shuddered.

"Hello Alice," he smirked.

"Mommy!" someone shouted behind him.

"Holly!" I gasped, pushing past him and enveloping my baby in my arms. "Oh god, I was so scared," I whimpered, and kissed her damp cheeks over and over. I pulled back a bit and stared at her face. I gasped. Already it was covered in deep cuts and bruises.

"What have you done?" I hissed at James. He shrugged.

"She tried to escape, I put her in her place," Holly buried her face into my shoulder.

"Where's Bella?" I snapped.

"She's not in a position to move right now," he said smugly. I looked at him in disgust.

"What do you mean? What have you done to her?"

"Nothing serious," he shrugged again. "No lasting damage,"

"Will you let them go home now then?" I asked quickly. "I'm here, you have what you wanted." He chuckled.

"I'm not letting any of you home. Yes, I have what I want. You. And also Holly and Bella. People you care about. Did you really think I was going to let them go home as soon as you waltzed in here? Seriously Alice, I thought you were cleverer than that,"

"No!" I gasped. "No, you have to let them go!" Holly whimpered, and I tightened my hold around her. "Please!" He laughed.

"Shall we go and find Bella?" he smirked. "And you can see where you'll be living," I glared at him.

"How can you do this?" I hissed. "You're fucked up in the head,"

"Think whatever you like Alice, it's not going to get you out of here. I've made sure there's no way you can escape this time." He grabbed my wrist, and pulled me up. Holly clutched at my hand as he dragged me along, my feet stumbling on the concrete floor. A door was wrenched open and both of us were pushed in.

"I'll come and see you later," he sneered. "I'm going to get myself some dinner,"

I looked around the room. It was completely black, just like the last one we had been in. I walked around, searching for a wall, and I tripped over something soft on the floor. I crawled around, and touched it again, and I screamed.

"There's a body!" I cried.

"Mom, it's okay, it's Bella!" Holly said gently, but her voice was shaking. "She tried to attack James, so he hit her around the head with something, I didn't see what it was, and he knocked her out. She's breathing, I checked."

"He hit her around the head?" I gasped, shocked. I felt for her face, and ran my hand along it, feeling the scratches and swollen skin.

"I can't believe I brought you here, got you into this," I whimpered. "I'm so sorry Holly," she stumbled forwards, until she was in my arms.

"Does Dad know you're here?" I shook my head, tears cascading down my cheeks.

"I thought he would really let you out, let you go. I should have remembered that James isn't a man of his word."

"Mom, what happened… before?" she asked, shaking a little in my arms.

"He kidnapped me, once when I was nine, again when I was sixteen."  
"Is that why you didn't talk?" I was silent. "Bella told me."

"Yes, that's why I didn't talk. Jasper helped me out of that. The second time I was kidnapped he took Bella with me," Holly was silent for a few minutes; I could feel her tears slowly soaking through the front of my shirt.

"I thought I'd lost you forever," I breathed in her ear. She sobbed harder.

"Holly?" Bella mumbled from in front of us.

"Bells?" I gasped. "Bella, honey, it's Alice. How are you feeling?"

"Alice? He got you too? Oh crap, why the hell did you listen to him? Why didn't you bring someone with you?"

"I was scared, I thought he would kill you both," Bella crawled forwards until she was in my arms next to Holly.

"I'm scared Ali," she whimpered. "I'm scared there won't be a chance for us to go this time. Laurent isn't here anymore. Who will let us out?"

"I don't know." I wept into her hair, and the three of us sat there for a while, pain erupting out of us in fountains of saltwater. The door opening broke the silence, and all three of us looked up to see the shadow of James in the doorway.

"Oh good Bella, you're awake to join the reunion," he sneered. I could feel both Holly and Bella shaking against me, and I held them tight. I wasn't going to let him get to them.

"So Alice, enjoying it here?" he asked. I glared at me. He walked towards me, and pulled my chin up so I was staring into his lifeless eyes. "Answer me," he growled.

"No," I hissed, and he laughed.

"Good. Wouldn't want you having fun,"

"Why are you doing this?" My voice was shaking, and he chortled.

"Be patient Alice, I'm going to tell you in a minute. But first, I think you should call your cell phone. I think Jasper wants to talk to you,"

"Leave him out of this!" I pleaded, but James was already dialling a number, and then let it ring, putting it on loudspeaker.

"Hello?" Jasper answered frantically. "Who is this?"

"Jazz," I whimpered.

"Alice? Alice is that you? Oh god Ali, where are you? Alice…"

"Tell him what you've done," James growled. I glared at him.

"Jasper, I love you so so much. I'm so sorry. I had to try and save her,"

"Alice, tell me where you are. I'm coming to get you."

"If you tell him…" James warned, and I heard a click. I looked up, and watched the gun being pointed at me. He had a gun.

"Who's that? Is that James?" Jasper growled. "Alice, I love you, I have to get you out," Holly whimpered, staring at the gun. I stroked her hair.  
"Jazz, I don't think I'm going to get out this time," I whispered, and then suddenly James leant forwards and hit the end call button. "Why did you call him?" I shouted. "Do you realise how much pain he's going to be in?"

"Of course I do," he laughed, "That's why I did it."

"I hate you," I breathed. He grabbed my arm tightly, so tight that I moaned in pain.

"Shall I tell you why you're here now Alice?" he growled. "Do you want to know why you've been in here so many times, why I've followed you for the last ten years?" He pulled me up into a standing position, and Holly and Bella fell off my lap. "Shall I tell you?" I squealed, and he laughed again, dropping my arm so that I fell onto the hard floor. "Let's get all these dirty secrets out."

**A/N: Ohh so this took like three drafts, and I'm still not happy with it, but oh well, this is as good as it's going to get! Updates obviously are slow now, I'm back to school, and even though the snow came back today, it was only like a centimetre, and then the rain washed it all away, so I won't have any time off school until half term :( And I really don't have time to write a lot anymore, because I've got one term and a bit of school left, and the teachers are pushing us soo hard to pass our exams! But yeah, all the secrets are going to come out next chapter (: There's not long left, I think I said like six chapters ago that there were about six chapters left, but I think there's about four more after this one :P Oops! Thank you for reviewing, I've almost got 1000!! Ahh I'm so so so so happy! x**


	38. Explanation

**I could be stuck here for a thousand years****  
****Without your arms to drag me out****  
****There you are standing right in front of me****  
****There you are standing right in front of me****  
****All this fear falls away, you leave me naked****  
****Hold me close, cause I need you to guide me to safety****  
****In the confusion and the aftermath****  
****You are my signal fire****  
****The only resolution and the only joy****  
****Is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes**

**Signal Fire- Snow Patrol**

**Disclaimer: I doooo nooottt owwwn TWILIGHT! **

Explanation

James kicked my leg, and I moaned in pain.

"So you want to know the whole story Alice? The whole reason you're here?" I gulped.

"Yes," I whispered, and he laughed, shoving his face right in front of me, so his pale fishy eyes glared into mine.

"Once upon a time there was a little boy called James," he sneered in a sing song voice. "He had just started high school, and was very nervous. He had been bullied at middle school, because he had glasses and braces, and his Mom bought him clothes that were too big because he would 'grow into them'. He didn't think that high school would be any different. And he was right. People laughed as he walked through the corridors, and a boy tripped him up. But in class, he sat next to a girl called Emma. She was the prettiest girl he had ever seen; she had long dark hair, and big brown eyes."

"Emma…" My throat was dry. "My Mom." He grinned, showing his yellow teeth, but the smile was pained. He sighed, and his voice became more serious.

"Emma was sweet and kind to me. She told me to ignore the bullying. She was in most of my classes, so most days we sat together. She was one of the popular girls; her best friend was Sasha Denali, who was a cheerleader and dating the captain of the football team, Ryan. But somehow, we managed to become friends. And I fell in love with her.

"Then one day, I was working in the library after school, and I didn't finish until late. I was walking through the corridors, when I heard it. Her beautiful voice and someone else who was crying. I didn't turn the corner to see who was with her, I stayed where I was and listened to her conversation, I wanted to keep hearing her voice. It was a few minutes before I realised who was with her. It was Sasha. I couldn't hear what she was saying, she was crying too hard, but then Emma said it. She told Sasha that she would help her through everything, and when the baby came, she would help Sasha look after it. And I couldn't help but gasp."

"Sasha Denali…" I interrupted. "Kate's mom?" He nodded.

"She was pregnant with Tanya at the time. After I gasped, both of them were silent, even Sasha's sobs stopped. She whispered that someone was there. I heard footsteps, and I did my best to disappear, to sink into the wall. But then she was in front of me, her dark eyes narrowed, and Sasha loitering behind her, her eyes all ugly and red and swollen. She shouted at me, told me I shouldn't be eavesdropping, and she slapped me around the face and walked off. I ran after her, ignoring Sasha who glared at me when I stopped her. I told her I loved her. She laughed at me. She told me I was a stupid, slimy little boy, and she was already dating someone else. David Brandon. Ryan's best friend. I realised then how wrong I'd been about her. She turned everyone against me in the next couple of days, and when Ryan found out that Sasha was pregnant, and that I'd found out before him, he beat me up. And David made sure no girl in our school would ever date me. He told everyone I had genital warts."

"That's it?" I whispered. "That's why I'm here? Because you and my Mom didn't end up like the happy couple you thought you would, and my Dad told everyone you had an STD? I'm here because you were a creep in high school?"

"Your Mom and Dad, and Kate's parents, both ruined my life. Now I'm ruining theirs. I would have tried to get Kate again, but since her Mom is dead, and her Dad's left, I figured it wasn't much point. But you…" he laughed. "You being gone causes quite a lot of pain. And their granddaughter as well."

"I've never met them," Holly whimpered. "Me not being there doesn't make them upset,"

"They saw you as a baby, they miss you a lot," he chuckled. "But it's their own fault. Emma wanted me, she was just controlled by David," His voice was a growl now.

"You're delusional!" I spat, and he smacked me around the face again. He crouched down in front of me, and stared into my eyes. He put his palm on my cheek.

"I'm not crazy," He hissed, and ran his nails down my face so that the huge scratches drew blood. I screamed and Holly burst into tears. Bella whimpered, frightened. "Emma loved me. She still does."

"Does Victoria know you're obsessed with my Mom?" I snapped, my hand to my cheek. "I'm sure she'd love to know,"

"Victoria's just here because she'll play the game," he laughed. "And if you tell her…" He pressed the cold gun against my head. "All three of you will be dead in seconds. Not that you're going to last much longer anyway. But you probably want to buy a little more time,"

"You want to kill us?" Bella whispered.

"I don't see the point of keeping you here all your life. Might as well do this kidnapping thing properly," I could feel my tears stinging the cuts down my face, but the pain wasn't bad compared to the fact that I'd brought Bella and Holly to their death just by being who I was.

"I was bullied at school," I growled. "Because of you. It was even worse than what they did to you. So what, a nasty rumour was spread about you? I was tripped up, hit, kicked, pinched, and laughed at. I was sent so frequently to the nurse's office that she stopped reporting it to the principal. All because of you. And yet, you have the nerve to keep me here, because you think what happened to you ruined your _life?_ Life isn't all about high school. Here you are, ruining my life. So you're no better than they are. In fact, you're way worse than they are. This is disgusting,"

"Nice philosophical speech there Alice, but you're not going to get out," he sneered. "See you later," He walked out, and slammed the door behind him.

"Mom? We're going to die right?" Holly whimpered. I was silent. I couldn't get out this time. I knew what was waiting for us. If we were lucky, we would be killed quickly, without pain. And I was never going to see Jasper again.

"Did he hurt your face Alice?" Bella asked, crawling over to me, and running her fingers delicately down the long scratches. "You're bleeding,"

"I'm fine," My voice was shaking. "Are you okay? You're beaten up pretty bad,"

"I'm fine too," but her voice was barely a whisper.

"I'm so so sorry Bella," I sobbed. "I should never have come to see you,"

"This isn't your fault," she snapped. "It's mine. I should have known not to stay outside on my own with Holly,"

"We can't stay inside forever Bells," I sighed.

"And you can't run forever. I'm happy I got to see you Alice. I missed you."

"I missed you too," I breathed, kissing her matted hair.

"Mom, I'm really scared," Holly was crying still, and I hugged her.

"Don't be scared. I'm here. You'll always be safe with me here. I'll never let him hurt you. He'll have to kill me first,"

"I don't want you to die," she whispered. "_I_ don't want to die,"

"We'll get out of this," I lied. "Somehow, we'll find a way out." Bella grabbed my hand, and squeezed it. "I love you both." I breathed.

"I love you too," they whispered in unison. I lay down, resting my head on the cold stone floor. Holly lay down next to me, curling into me and wrapping her tiny arms over me, and slowly, I felt myself falling asleep…

***

Something crashed loudly, and I sat up, Holly doing exactly the same.

"What was that?" she whimpered. Bella murmured something from next to us, she was still asleep. I shook her awake. She sat up, looking around wildly. It took me a moment to realise that the room shouldn't be light. But the door was flung open, light flooding the black room. I looked at Bella. Her face was ruined, covered in congealed blood and bruises. Holly looked a little better, but still had several nasty cuts and bruises.

"We have to try and get out," I whispered.

"But what if it's a trap?" Bella whimpered.

"What if it isn't? We'll just regret not trying. Let's go," I pulled Holly up, and she swayed a little.

"I feel funny," she moaned.

"We're going to try and get out of here Holly." I told her gently. "Then we'll find Jasper, and we'll find a home somewhere, maybe we'll go to Europe, or Australia. Somewhere he can't get us. Does that sound good?" She nodded.

I tiptoed to the door and peered around it. The huge warehouse was all lit up with overhead lights, something that hadn't been there when I'd come in. Holly walked towards me, and linked her hand with mine, and Bella did the same. I stepped out into the lit hall, suddenly aware of how little security there was. Something was wrong.

"We need to find the exit, and quick," I hissed. "If I say run, run okay?" Both girls nodded, and looking at their messed up faces, I knew I had to make them safe.

The lights suddenly flickered off, and Holly gave a tiny terrified squeak. I froze, shaking a little. Someone was shouting, and it echoed around the huge warehouse again and again, so that by the time it reached us, it was incomprehensible. Both Bella and Holly's nails dug into each of my palms. I swallowed, and started to move again, picking up my pace. Something had happened that shouldn't. Maybe that something had given us a chance. The shouting stopped, and everything was silent.

"Going somewhere?" James sneered from behind us, and I turned, my eyes closed. I released both of the girls' hands. One. Two. Three.

"Run!" I screamed. It took about a second for them to process it before they moved, and James moved to follow them, his eyes glinting. I stepped in his way. I was not going to let him hurt them. I had made a promise. "Leave them alone," I growled, and I jumped at him, knocking him to the floor, hitting every part of him I could reach. He rolled over, and pinned my arms to the floor, so that I squirmed on the hard concrete. He gripped my wrists hard, squeezing them with all him strength and I gasped in pain.

"Don't mess with me Alice," he warned quietly in my ear. "Because I can make things a lot more difficult for you," I felt the cold gun press against my stomach, and I swallowed.

"Go on then, kill me. But you're not gaining anything by doing it. My Mom is never going to love you. She got married, she had two children. You never even crossed her mind," He yelled in anger, and punched me in the stomach, so that all the wind was knocked out of me. I gasped, and he punched my face, my mouth filled with blood.

"You. Are. A. Spoilt. Bitch." He shouted with each hit. I tried not to scream. I didn't want Holly or Bella to come back for me.

"Leave her alone," someone groaned from behind him. James released my wrists, and I squinted through the blood to where the voice came from. Jasper was crouched on the floor, his face a little bloodied, but there.

"Jasper!" I gargled through the blood filling my mouth. "Jazz, I love you!"

"Oh, how touching," James laughed, the cold sound echoing. "I found Jasper here trying to get into the warehouse ten minutes or so. Luckily, I managed to knock him unconscious before he got to you. But, here you both are, reunited. It's good you get to spend your last minutes together.

Jasper crawled towards me, and I tried to muster up all the strength I could to reach out my hand to him. He took it, and moaned a little as he looked at me.

"Oh Alice, what's he done to you?" He pushed my blood soaked hair out of my eyes, and then started to whisper quickly. "I need you to try and run. I know it hurts, and it'll be hard. But I will find a way out. It's not me he wants. Run, Alice, run. Are you ready?"

"I don't think I can…"

"No whispering!" James snapped.

"Try!" He hissed quickly. "I love you." So I closed my eyes, and in the exact same moment I heaved myself off the ground, Jasper flew at James. I watched them hit each other for about a second, and then I ran. Each step hurt more than any of James' punches, but I kept running. I convinced myself that if I stopped running, everything I loved and knew would stop too. Jasper, Holly, Bella. Edward, Emmett, Rosalie, Cassie, Kate, Cynthia, Maggie, my parents, Carlisle and Esme. Their names ran over and over in my head, and tears ran down my cheeks as I thought each one, mingling with the blood. And then, suddenly, I heard footsteps behind me.

"You won't escape this time Alice" someone called after me. I let out a sob, continuing to run.

"Jasper!" I cried out. "Jazz?"

"Jasper's not here!" the person laughed cruelly. "He's gone now. It's okay, I'll end the pain for you. You won't feel a thing, and all that loss, it will disappear."

"Jasper!" I screeched, and James laughed cruelly.

"Alice!" somebody yelled, and suddenly Bella was in my way, I ran into her and we both fell to the floor, our limbs tangling together. James grinned, and pointed the gun at me. Then I heard the shot, and I screamed.

"NO!" I heard Holly yell.

Blood poured everywhere, all over my T-shirt, and across my hands. But nothing hurt.

Bella screamed in pain. I gasped, and untangled myself from her. At the top of her thigh, was a tiny round hole in her clothing, which seemed to be spewing blood. I stood up, facing James. I ran towards him.

"No!" I screeched, but hands grabbed my arms, twisting me around. Jasper's blue eyes sparkled in the little light there was, and he took a step back, shocked. He pulled a gun out of his pocket.

"Alice, get down!" he yelled. I threw myself to the floor, and he fired four shots. I screamed, my voice mixing with Bella's shouts of pain.

**A/N: **

**Ahhhh. Big big big big big cliffie there! Again, it's been a week or so since I updated, I was going to do it at the weekend, but I got ill, and spent most of the time drinking Lemsip (Those things are truly disgusting) and feeling sorry for myself. It'll be mean leaving you with such a HUGE cliff-hanger and not updating, so I'll try and do it as soon as possible. Oh. My. God. I have over 1000 reviews. Do you know how happy that makes me??? Thank you EVERYONE who has left a review, you are all such totally amazing people, and every single one of you gets cookies. I hope you like them (: **


	39. Holding On

**Trying not to lose my head but I have never been this scared before****  
****Tell you what Ill do instead, lay my body down on the floor****  
****To forget what Ive done, silhouette til the good lord come****  
****All we know is distance****  
****Were close and then we run****  
****Kiss away the difference****  
****I know you hate this one**

**Where The Story Ends-The Fray**

**(Yes, The Fray again, I swear half the songs on here are by them lol! Their songs just fit this story so well!)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight any more than you do (: **

39. Holding On

James fell to the floor, yelling out. I squeezed my eyes shut, my breath raking down my throat, and I tried to block everything out. I wanted to be unconscious, to faint, for someone to knock me out, so I wouldn't have to see the blood, and hear Bella's screams. I pressed my face against the freezing concrete, sobbing into it.

"Mommy," Holly whimpered from next to me, grabbing the hand that lay at my side and squeezing it. "Mommy, I'm here," I gulped, and sat up, gathering her into my arms and holding her as tightly as I could. "Ouch," she moaned. "That hurts,"

I watched Jasper as he tore his t-shirt and wound it around Bella's leg.

"I think it's gone through an artery," he muttered, and by the looks of the blood spewing from her leg, I knew he was right.

"Will she be okay?" My voice was tiny, but he heard what I said, and he stayed silent. "Jasper?" The tears were coming thicker and faster now, and he looked at me, his face serious.

"It depends on how much blood she loses. We do need to get her to a hospital, fast. There's an exit wound, so at least there's no bullet in her leg still. We need to get her out, and call an ambulance." I looked to where James had fallen, and I gulped. I unlatched my arms from around Holly, and carefully walked over to him. His eyes were glazed open, his mouth sagging open.

"He's dead," I whispered. It was strange, but I felt sorry for this man, four bullet holes in his chest. Without his sneer and the evil glint in his eyes, he looked normal, human.

"Alice, I need you to call an ambulance," Jasper said quickly, throwing me his phone. I caught it easily, and began to dial 911. As soon as I hit the call button, the phone went blank. I screamed in frustration.

"There's no battery!" I cried, frantically pressing the on button. Nothing happened.

"Bella!" someone gasped and I swirled around. Edward stood there, staring at Bella screaming and tossing on the floor.

"Edward what the hell are you doing here?" Jasper roared. He didn't answer, just crouched beside Bella, and grabbed her hand.

"I'm so sorry Bella," he said, stroking her bruised face. She sobbed, and her screaming stopped, although she still squirmed and her face was screwed up in pain.

"Did you bring your cell phone?" I asked. He shook his head, his features frozen. I swore.

"We're going to need to get her out of here, get someone's help," Jasper started to slide his arms under Bella, but Edward pushed them out the way, and did it himself.

"Should I lift her when she's like this?" he asked, biting his lip.

"It's the only way she'll survive," Jasper told him. "Just make sure you do it carefully," He nodded, and slowly lifted her. She started to scream again with the movement. Tears ran down Edward's face.

"We need to get out of here," I grabbed Holly's hand, and started to walk towards a light I saw, it had to lead to daylight.

After about three minutes, I saw the door, I ran towards it, dragging Holly with me, and stepped outside into the fresh air. I gasped it in, and watched as Edward and Jasper walked through the door, carrying Bella.

"Stay awake Bella," Edward pleaded. "I love you. I love you. I should never have said those things to you," He was sobbing, and her eyelids fluttered open.

"I love you too," she whispered, then closed them again.

"No, you need to stay awake!" he sobbed. My head suddenly felt light, and I swayed a little. I lost my balance, and started to fall, but Jasper stepped forwards and caught me.

"It's okay, we'll get you to hospital soon," he murmured. "You don't look well,"

"We need to find a car," I summoned all the strength I had, and stood myself up. I looked around the deserted street frantically, praying that maybe a car would come around the corner. But there was nothing.

"There!" Jasper shouted. "There's a payphone!" I could see a phone at the end of the street. He ran towards it, and I sat down on the sidewalk, my head spinning.

"Mom? Are you okay?" Holly asked, sitting next to me. I shook my head, and suddenly, I vomited a fountain of blood. Holly screamed, and Edward swore. I coughed, and retched at the disgusting taste that filled my mouth, and then I burst into tears again. What was wrong with me? What was happening? "Mommy!" Holly sobbed, reaching out towards me. I lay down on the ground, trying to avoid the puddle of blood.

"I hurt…everywhere." My voice was so quiet, I wasn't even sure if Holly could hear it, but she stroked my hair, and her hot tears fell on my face.

"What… what's happened? Alice?" Jasper's voice was shaking, and I sighed. I liked it better when he was near me.

"I puked up blood," I whispered, and I watched his face fall.

"It looks like you've got really bad internal bleeding," tears were falling down his face. "If you're puking up that much… we need to get you to hospital as much as Bella. The ambulance will be here in three minutes or so, it won't be long."  
"Jasper…" I whispered. He leant down next to me. "You have to make sure Bells gets better okay? Tell her that's all I wanted."

"What are you talking about?" he sobbed. "You tell her. Alice you're going to hospital too. I am _not_ letting you die."  
"You might have to," I knew my strength was fading, and that I didn't have much time left. "Look after Holly; you can be a proper father Jazz. You can get to know her,"

"Don't leave me!" He grabbed my hand. "Alice, don't leave me. Don't leave Holly. I love you. I love you more than anything."

"Mommy…Are you going to die?" Holly sobbed. I closed my eyes.

"I love you both. But you have to be strong for me. Can you do that?"

"Don't die. You have to look after me. You have to brush my hair the way I like in the mornings. You have to tuck me in and kiss my head every night. I don't want you to die. I love you. Mommy, don't go! Don't go!" She was getting hysterical now, and I used all my strength to raise my hand and stroke her face, wipe the tears away.

I could hear sirens in the distance, and I smiled. They could save Bella now. Maybe they could save me; maybe I could stay with my family. But everything hurt so bad, I wasn't sure if they _could _save me. And slowly, I felt the blackness pull me under.

**Jasper POV**

As the sirens approached, her eyes closed. I gasped, and checked her pulse. Her heart was still beating. Still there. Paramedics and Doctors swarmed around her, gently pushing me out of the way, pulling the hem of her shirt up a little so I could see the bruises spread across her stomach.

I felt a little hand link inside mine, and I looked to see Holly, tears pouring down her tiny face. I picked her up, and held her to me, her legs wound around my waist.

"She said she loved me," Edward murmured, staring at a spot somewhere in the distance. "I was so stupid." He sank to the ground and put his head in his hands, I could see his shoulders shaking. A policewoman walked over and crouched down in front of him, talking quietly to him. A paramedic came over to me.

"We're going to have to take her as well, she's got some very bad cuts there, she'll need some stitches," he told me, and I set Holly down on the ground. "What's your name?" he asked her.

"Holly," she sobbed. "Do I get to ride in the ambulance with Mom? Is she going to die? She said she was going to die. I don't want her to die!" She was shaking, and tears poured down her cheeks.

"Your Mom is bleeding inside." He told her. "But we think we can make her better, if we work quickly. You'll have to go to hospital in a different ambulance though, we need the room. You'll have to come with us too, you look badly bruised." He added to me. She bit her lip.

"Come with me?" she pleaded, still clutching my hand. "I don't want to be on my own," I nodded. I knew Alice would want me to go with Holly, even though it would break my heart to be away from her, to not know what happened to her.

"I'll stay with Alice and Bella," Edward said quietly, standing up. "I'll look after her Jazz," I walked towards him and hugged him.

"We'll talk later about you coming here, but for now, thank you," I murmured, and he squeezed me back. "Keep her alive, Edward. Please try."

"We're all going to get through this." I watched the tears fall down his cheeks. "And we'll all be happy."

"I don't know Edward. Sometimes I feel like I'm fighting fate," I whispered. He hugged me again.

"Well fight it as hard as you can," he growled. "We're going to kick fate's ass." I chuckled sadly.

"I'll see you at the hospital," I told him, and he waved to me as he climbed into the back of the ambulance. I watched it speed away, carrying Alice and Bella inside, both of them fighting for their lives.

"Come on then Holly, we'll get you to hospital so you can see your Mom," the policewoman said gently, and we both helped her climb up into the back. "I'll talk to you at the hospital later," she told me as she walked back to the car.

Holly lay down on the rickety bed and the paramedics checked her over quickly.

"You'll need stitches, and you'll need a lot of therapy after all that's happened to you, but otherwise you'll be fine," a man told her. She reached out for my hand, and I grabbed it, pulling it up to my mouth and kissing it.

"I'm scared," she whimpered. "I want Mommy to wake up, and be okay,"

"So do I," I murmured, and she closed her eyes, tears clinging to her thick lashes.

"Can I call you Dad?" she asked quietly.

"Of course you can! That's what I am isn't it?" She smiled.

"I always wanted a Dad. It made me sad to not have one, even though I had never met you. Bella said that you made my Mom happy, that when she was upset, you made her smile. I want her to smile again. I want her to stop crying all the time. I want us to be a family. I've never had a proper family."

"I remember when Alice told me she was pregnant with you," I said gently. "I was so happy. Scared, because I wasn't going to be there for a lot of the pregnancy, but so excited that I was going to have a son or daughter. And I was devastated when I found out I might never get to see you," I knew everyone in the ambulance was listening, but I didn't care. "I can't believe that the time I put the band-aid on you I didn't even realise who you were. Maybe this wouldn't have happened if I did."

"This would have always happened," Holly murmured sleepily.

"Stay awake, Holly, you need to stay awake," someone called; I didn't look around to see who said it. She groaned.

"I haven't slept properly in ages!" she moaned. "Why can't I sleep? It will stop me thinking about my Mom!"

"He might have hit you around the head, and it could be dangerous if you sleep," I told her. Her eyes fluttered open and she rolled them.

"We're here!" someone announced, and the ambulance stopped. The doors were flung open, and Holly was carried out on a stretcher. I held her hand.

"Dad," Holly whispered. I looked at her. "Go see Mom. I want to know how she is. I want to know what's happened to her." I nodded, glad that Holly was feeling the same way as I was. I leant down and kissed her cut forehead, and then I ran. Ran into the building, desperate to find her. I passed a doctor who had been at the scene, and they called out her room number to me.

I found it quickly, and pressed myself up against the window. The bed was empty. I walked inside, and looked around, praying she could be there somewhere. Someone walked in.

"Are you looking for Miss Brandon?" the nurse asked and I nodded. "She's gone into surgery; she won't be coming out for a while."

"Is she okay?" I asked frantically. "She'll be fine, right?"

"Are you related to Miss Brandon?" she asked.

"I'm her fiancé," my voice was shaking. She took a deep breath.

"Miss Brandon has extremely severe internal bleeding in a number of places in her body. One of her lungs has been punctured, and the amount of abdominal bleeding is extraordinary. If she makes it through surgery, she'll be in ICU for a long time, and her condition will be very unstable." I took a few steps backward and collapsed onto the bed. I was sobbing again.

"She has a daughter!" I cried, "Our daughter, who is waiting for her Mom to be okay. And she's only just seen her friends and family after being separated from them for _ten _years! She can't die now; she has too much to live for!"

"We still don't know the severity of Miss Brandon's case," she said gently, sitting beside me. "She could recover, she may not. But for now, you have to keep a positive frame of mind, or you won't get through this."

"How's Bella?" I asked. "Do you know how Bella is? She really wanted her to be okay, if she wanted anything, it would be and Holly and Bella got better."

"Miss Swan?" the nurse asked, and I nodded. "She's in surgery as well, but her condition seems a lot better than Miss Brandon's. Of course she's lost a lot of blood, she'll need blood transfusions for a while, but she should recover, and despite her injuries, there's no internal bleeding, she'll only need stitches. Mr Whitlock is in the waiting room, you may want to sit with him."  
"I have to go find my daughter first, but I'll go and sit with him afterwards, he's my brother," I murmured, and left the room, striding down the corridors to try and find Holly. I spoke to a nurse, and she told me which room to find her in.

"How is she?" Holly asked as soon as I walked in, and I burst into fresh tears.

"They're not sure if she's going to make it or not," I cried, and she let out a tiny sob. I sat on the bed next to her and she rested her head on my shoulder.

"They gave me stitches." She murmured. "I got stitches, and she's dying. I should be dying instead of her; I should have told her on the phone that it was a trap."

"Don't you dare say that," I growled. "She wouldn't want you to think like that. And she might get through this. The nurse said she might." She sniffed.

"I haven't spent any time in the last ten years without her," she whispered. "I can't lose her now,"

"I can't lose her either." I sighed. "But we're going to get through this. And we're going to pray that she comes out of this, as the person we always knew."  
"How's Bella?" she asked.

"They think she'll be fine," I told her. The only bit of good news today.

"The Doctor told me I could leave when you got here," she was crying, and her voice was thick and wobbly. "He's booked me in once a week with the therapist." I nodded, and took her hand, and together, we tried to find the waiting room. Edward was waiting for us, covered in Bella's blood, his head in his hands.

"Edward!" I breathed, and ran towards him. He looked up at me, his face tearstained.

"Have they got any more news?" He asked me.

"Bella should make it out fine. Alice…" I sobbed, and fell onto the chair. He put his arm around my shoulder. "Alice… she might not. They say she's bleeding a lot, and they might not be able to fix her. I'm so scared." Holly climbed onto my lap and curled into my chest. I stroked her hair, wiping tears off her face.

"I've called everyone at the house, and also Kate, Alice's parents, and Cynthia. They're all coming."

"Thanks Edward. For everything." He patted my shoulder. A policeman walked into the room, and looked at us. I groaned. "Here we go…" I sighed, as he walked over to us.

But all I could think of was Alice, and if she would ever get better…

**A/N:  
:\ Ugh, writing the Jasper POV was so hard on that one!! I think it's definitely the weaker part of the chapter, although I did get the Holly/Jasper relationship building up. At least James is dead though, I really hated him xD I wrote most of this yesterday, and just tidied it up a little tonight, I'll start writing the next chapter now, so I can update as soon a possible! Hope you liked it, please review!! x**


	40. Waiting

**Love is our resistance****  
****They'll keep us apart and they wont stop breaking us down****  
****Hold me****, ****our lips must always be sealed****  
****If we live a life in fear****  
****I'll wait a thousand years****  
****Just to see you smile again.****  
Resistance-Muse **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Waiting

**Alice POV**

I think it was the pain that woke me up. It ripped through me, so that my vision turned red, and nothing was real any more. I could hear sirens, and screams, but they were far away, not here with me. Right now, I _wanted_ to die. Because it hurt… so much. Worse than anything I'd ever experienced. I wanted Jasper's hands to guide me through the hurt, to make it go away. But he wasn't here. I was utterly alone in my own private darkness. And I stayed silent, and let it swallow me again, so that I was pulled under, so the pain numbed into nothing.

**Edward POV**

Arms wound around my neck, and I looked to see Maggie sitting next to me, tears dripping down her freckled cheeks. She didn't say anything, she just rested her head against my shoulder, and we sat in silence. She'd known me for too long to think that talking was what I wanted.

"Edward," Rosalie whispered as she walked into the room, and walked forwards to hug me, planting Cassie in Emmett's shaking arms on the way. She wrapped her arms around me, and kissed my bloodstained cheek. "Look at you," she sobbed, reaching into her bag and pulling out a tissue, dabbing the blood that turned my skin a mottled red, the tears cutting through it, so they left huge clean lines. "When you followed Jazz… I was so scared…" she hugged me again, and then sat in the chair on my other side, grabbing hold of my hand tightly.

"Where are Jasper and Holly?" Emmett asked, his eyes gazing into the distance, not really concentrating on anything.

"The police are talking to them," I whispered, and he nodded, and started to rock Cassie in his arms, a little too quickly for her to be able to fall asleep.

"We spoke to a Doctor, we heard what's happening," Rosalie said gently. "Charlie and Jacob will be here soon," I closed my eyes. Jacob was coming. I loved her, and she had told me that she loved me, but she would choose Jacob over me. He was her _boyfriend. _I stood up in anger, and Maggie jumped, her head jerking in the air. I stomped off to the bathroom.

I stared at my reflection in the mirror, and turned the tap on, scrubbing the blood of my hands. Scrubbing with the grainy soap so hard that my hands began to ache. I sobbed out loud, my tears falling into the red water that rushed down the drain and I scraped at the skin with my fingernails.

"Edward!" I heard Emmett call, and with one final sob, my knees collapsed and I fell onto the floor, my head pressed up against the cool sink, my hands red and raw. I hummed out loud, the song that circled around my head, the one that I hadn't played in such a long time. One that had been inspired by Bella. I could still remember the first time I had played it to her, even though it was such a long time ago…

"_Can I hear you play piano Edward?" she pleaded. "It's pretty! You make good music!" I shook my head. "Please!" I looked at her brown eyes; they were pretty, like chocolate. I liked chocolate. _

_ "Do I have to?" I moaned. "I want to play cars!" She nodded, pulling her puppy dog eyes on me. I groaned, and walked towards the piano. I played the C Minor scale Auntie Carmen had taught me to warm my fingers up, and then tried to remember the tune I had played the other day, the pretty one that made me think of Bella. I knew it started with an E, so I played that note, and then it turned into chords, and my fingers moved quickly on piano. I remembered the hours of playing that Auntie Carmen had made me do when I went to stay, and was pleased, because it meant I could do this for Bella. I finished, and turned around. She was sitting with her hand over her mouth, crying. Uh-Oh. Mommy would get cross if I made Bella cry. _

_ "I'm sorry Bella!" I cried, running over and giving her a hug. "I didn't mean to make you cry! Didn't you like it?" She shook her head. _

_ "I loved it!" she whispered. "These are happy tears," I stared at her. Who cried when they were happy? But Bella had always been weird. In a good way. _

_ "I made it for you!" I told her, and hugged her again. I wiped the tears off her cheeks. _

_ "You can play it at our wedding," she told me. I nodded, and picked up a car. _

_ "Can we play now?" I asked. _

"Edward!" Emmett called again, and banged on the door. I didn't answer. I just cried. Cried for the childhood innocence that love would last forever. That nothing would ever come between us. That nothing like this would ever happen. I swore loudly, and punched the wall, moaning in pain when it made impact. I stared at my bleeding knuckles. Nothing was ever going to be the same again.

**Holly POV**

"Holly, we need you to speak to us," the woman who had introduced herself as Officer Anna Reddale pleaded. "We need you to tell us what happened," My breath whooshed out of me in a gust as I sighed, and Dad squeezed my hand.

I stared at the white walls, spotless and bright. I didn't want to speak to her, I didn't want to remember. All I could think about was blood, red sticky blood that was everywhere; dried into my clothes, into my hair, under my nails, and in every corner of my mind, flowing eerily, red and dangerous. Blood that spread over the sidewalk, turning it crimson and blood that poured from everywhere, making me feel sick. I shuddered.

"Holly?" Anna Reddale asked again. The red changed back into white, and I relaxed a little. "How did they take you in the first place?" I shook my head, gulping and trying to swallow the huge lump in my throat that refused to disappear.

"Victoria can still come and get me," I whimpered. Anna frowned, and touched my arm.

"We arrested Victoria," she told me. "She came back to the warehouse a little after you left, and there were police there waiting for her. But we can't officially charge her until we know what happened. Can you tell us?" I shook my head again.

"Holly's been through a lot. Her Mom's in surgery right now. Can you come back and talk to her tomorrow?" Dad asked.

"But…"  
"I don't think she's going to talk today," he growled.

"Okay Holly, Office Forrest will take you back to the waiting room. Mr Whitlock, we still have some questions for you." A big burly man stepped forwards, and I let go of my Dad's hand, following him through the door. We stopped in the waiting room, and I looked frantically around for Edward. He wasn't there. I gasped, looking for someone I knew, and then the read headed girl in the corner looked up.

"Maggie!" I whimpered, and rushed towards her, hugging her. She squeezed me back.

"Thank god you're okay," she breathed in my ear, "I was so scared when I realised you were gone."

"Holly?" someone gasped and I spun around. The most beautiful woman I'd ever seen walked towards me, her hand stretched out, her other arm wrapped around a squirming toddler. She swore, and a tear fell down her flawless cheek. "Is that really you?" she asked. I nodded, she seemed oddly familiar, in some strange way. It was then that I realised.

"You're… Rosalie?" I asked. She nodded, and smiled a little. I walked towards her and wound my arms around her waist. She sobbed loudly, and hugged me tightly, so that my tears soaked into her floaty camisole. "Where's Edward?" I whispered, and she stroked my hair.

"He's gone to the toilet, he's a bit upset. Emmett's gone after him." I closed my eyes and relaxed into her warm body as she handed the little girl to Maggie and sat on a chair, cradling me in her lap. It felt so safe to have an adult holding me like this, like nothing could get to me anymore. I pretended it was Mom, and let the warm and fuzzy feeling take hold of me…

***

I woke up startled, and shouting filled my ears. My eyes flickered open and I immediately squeezed them shut again at the bright light. The shouting carried on, and I opened my eyes again, blinking against the whiteness. I was still in Rosalie's arms, and she was still crying. The huge man sitting next to her had one arm around her and one hand holding the snoozing toddler on his lap, and he was sleeping, snoring a little bit. This must be Emmett. I looked towards the source of the shouting. Jacob and Edward were in the middle of the room, faces a centimetre away from each other, yelling loudly. Other people waiting were glaring at them.

"I can't believe you let her get taken! Why didn't you stay with her the whole time? Idiot!" Jacob shouted.

"What, do you expect me to watch her all the time?" Edward bellowed back. "She's not a kid!"

"You never cared! I just can't believe you would let them take her!" Jacob grabbed the front of Edward's t-shirt, and Edward pushed him back.

"Don't make me fight you, Black," he growled. "Of course I care about her. I've loved her since I was four. There's never been anyone else. She's my soul mate!"

Jacob drew his fist back, and in one, quick moment, he punched Edward in the face. I screamed at the same time as Edward retaliated. Emmett jerked awake, and groaned at the sight of the two boys rolling around on the floor. He jogged towards them, grabbed both of them by the hair, and pulled them away from each other.

"There are two girls right now, fighting for their lives, and here you two are fighting _each other!" _He bellowed. "The one you happen to be fighting over is my sister, and I know she wouldn't have wanted this. Stop acting like idiots!" Edward walked back over to Maggie and sat down next to her, his lip bloody, scowling at Jacob. Jacob stood in the middle of the room, shaking with anger.

I looked around the room, to see if any more people had come. Charlie sat in a chair on his own, his face white, a cup of coffee clutched in his shaking hands.

"Where's my Dad?" I whimpered.

"He's gone to get you some food," Emmett explained, walking over to me. "It's nice to meet you Holly, although I would have rather met you in a better setting." He glanced around the room. "And with you looking a lot better than you do now," I raised my hand up to my swollen face and grimaced.

"How long was I sleeping for? How's Mom? How's Bella?"

"About two hours," he replied, and Rosalie stroked my hair, brushing through the huge clumps. "Alice is still in surgery, but Bella came out about half an hour ago. She's still asleep, but they're going to let us see her soon." I nodded.

Dad walked into the room carrying a tray full of food. He sat it down on my lap.

"Eat," he told me. "You're not going to have much energy after what you've been through." I picked up a stale sandwich and bit into it. It tasted disgusting, but I was starving, so I ate it quickly.

"Holly," Edward called from across the room. I looked up, and he walked towards me. "I found this on the floor earlier, when…" He passed something into my hand, and I gulped when I saw the dented metal heart. I prised it open, and stared at the photo inside, covered in someone's blood. I stared at the smiles and felt tears welling up in my eyes.

"We were happy," I whispered. "Even though she cried at night, and sometimes all day, we were happier than we are now. I would give anything to go back there," I snapped the locket closed again.

"Mr Swan?" the nurse asked. "Do you want to come and see Bella now?" Charlie nodded, and Emmett got up as well, and they walked together out of the room. Edward clutched the sides of his plastic chair so hard they turned white.

"I can't do this anymore," I whispered, and slid of Rosalie's lap. She tried to grab hold of my hand, but I ran for the door. Once I was out of the waiting room, I couldn't think of anything to do but run. I couldn't stop. I rushed through swinging doors so that they banged behind me, I pushed past nurses and doctors and patients and family of patients until I couldn't run anymore. I stopped, and put my hands on my knees, panting. And I stared at the door in front of me. Next to it was a little label, telling me whose room it was. _Alice Brandon. _

I pushed the door, and it swung open. A bed sat in the middle of the room, and the rest of it was empty, it was obvious she hadn't been here yet. I walked over to the bed and touched the covers, clean and white. And although I knew I shouldn't, I pulled the covers back, as though she could be there, hiding. And when she wasn't, I climbed into the bed, pulled the blanket right over my head, and sobbed into the linen. And I waited for her to come back.

**A/N: **

**Okay, so I hate it. But I haven't updated for more than two weeks now, because of stupid writers block, and I thought you all at least deserved something from me. I'm just sorry that after the long wait, it couldn't have been better :( I'm on my holiday now, but I have LOADS of coursework to do. Hopefully, I'll have another chapter up this week and… OMG. The next chapter might be the last one! That's scary. There'll either be one or two chapters left, depending on the length of the next one… It's ok though, I have another story coming for when this one is finished, I just finished the second chapter xD **


	41. Actions

**Something in your eyes, makes me wanna lose myself****  
****Makes me wanna lose myself, in your arms****  
****There's something in your voice, makes my heart beat fast****  
****Hope this feeling lasts, the rest of my life. **

**It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me****  
****It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from****  
****It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me****  
****It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong**

**Feels Like Home- Edwina Hayes (I think the original version is by ****Chantal Kreviazuk, but I saw My Sister's Keeper the other day, and the scene with this in was so beautiful!)**

41. Actions

**Jasper POV**

"Holly?" I shouted, running through the hallways. I couldn't lose her, not now. "Holly?" I could feel the tears that had been turning on and off all day starting to well up again. "Excuse me!" I stopped a passing Doctor in her tracks. "Have you seen a girl, she's ten, she's got long dark hair, and she has a bruised face?" I was talking so fast that she had to get me to slow down and repeat it.

"No, I'm sorry sir, do you…" I didn't wait to hear the rest of her sentence; I started to run again, even though she called after me. I swore repeatedly under my breath as I searched the huge hospital, praying that she could just turn up, and be there, in front of me.

"Holly?" I called again frantically, and I ran my hand through my messy hair. "Holly, baby?" People were staring, some tutting, but I ignored them, pushing past them until I couldn't see anything but Holly in my head, but she wasn't here, not in real life.

I almost didn't see the door. It was slightly ajar, but it was the label next to it that caught my eye and made me stop in my tracks and take a step backwards to stare at it. _Alice Brandon._ I sobbed out loud, wiping the tears from my face, and I slowly pushed open the door. It took me two seconds to work out who the lump under the covers was.

"Holly!" I gasped. "I was so scared!" I ran towards her and she peeked out from under the white blanket, her face wet and blotchy. I gathered her up into my arms and she cried into my chest, long keening sobs that made me want to cry with her. But I wiped the remaining tears away, because I knew that she needed hope.

"I want her here, I want her to make me feel better," she cried. "But I don't know if she'll even come back!" I squeezed her tighter, and kissed her knotted hair.

"We have to believe that she can come back sweetheart," I whispered. "We can't give up hope. She's getting all the help she can have. She's still here. She's not gone."  
"I'm scared," Holly's voice was so tiny and helpless that it took all my strength not to break down right in front of her.

"I'm scared too," I murmured. "But I'm trying not to think the worst. And that's what you have to do too Holly. We can't just give up on her,"

She sat up and stared at me, her blue eyes large, with pools of saltwater in the bottoms of them.

"We don't have to run anymore right?" she whimpered. "I can have a home?" I nodded, brushing her tears away with my fingers. "I don't want it without Mom. I know she wanted it for years, to have a home, but she always moved us instead. But I know it was only to keep me from all this."

"You won't have to have it without her," I was crying now, big fat tears falling fast down my cheeks.

"She told us she was going to die!" Holly shrieked. "She's never wrong! I'm so so scared, but at the same time praying that she might have been wrong this one time!"

"Don't think like that," my voice was shaking. I remembered Alice always being right. She seemed to always know the outcome of situations, whatever they were.

I hugged Holly to my chest, and she wound her thin arms around me.

"We're going to get through this," I wept. "Whatever happens, we're going to get through this."

"If she… if she doesn't…make it, will you still be my Dad?" she sobbed. I stared at her. Did she think I was only here because Alice was?

"Of course I will!" I exclaimed. "I haven't known you for very long, and you're already one of the most important people in my life!" I saw her faint smile, hidden immediately by her tears.

"I love you Daddy," she whispered. I kicked my shoes off and lay down on the bed, so we were lying next to each other.

"I love you too," I breathed, and as she dozed off to sleep, I could have sworn I could hear her whispering: _Please _over and over. And we lay like that until a nurse caught us, and sent us out, Holly asleep in my arms.

**Edward POV  
**I yelled out as my eyes flew open, and Jasper's head jerked up from the other side of the room, Holly asleep in his arms

"Are you okay?" his voice sounded scared and worried, I knew he was close to breaking point. I nodded slowly. The quick bursts of sleep I was getting were filled with dark nightmares, but I just couldn't stay awake. I didn't know how many hours I had been up for, but I knew it was a long time.

I looked at Jasper. His eyes were red and puffy from the masses of tears that had leaked out of them, and his face was bruised. I didn't know what that sick bastard had done to him before I had gotten there.

"Edward!" someone cried, and I was suddenly enveloped in my Mom's arms. I breathed in the smell of baking that seemed permanently attached to her, and burst into tears. "Shush its okay baby," she whispered, rubbing circles on my back.

"Hey Mom, Dad," Jasper murmured from across the room. I was released and she turned around to hug Jasper, but froze when she saw him.

"What did he do to you?" she gasped. I watched her look down at the sleeping girl in his arms. "Is that… is that Holly? Oh if I could kill him all over again," she growled.

Holly stirred in Jasper's arms and her eyes fluttered open.

"Hello," she whispered shyly. Mom ran towards her and pulled her out of Jasper's grip, hugging her tightly.

"Hello Holly," she cried, her tears running the perfectly neat make-up she always had on. "I'm your Grandma Esme," I saw Dad hugging Jasper behind her, and then he walked towards me and sat next to me.

"I'm so glad you're okay," he sobbed, and he squeezed me.

"Alice is in surgery," I was practically bawling now, and attracting dozens of stares, but I didn't care. My Mom and Dad were here now. I wish it was as easy as Mom sticking a band-aid on the wound, but I knew it wasn't. And that's what made me cry more. "Bella's come out; Charlie and Emmett are with her,"

"Oh sweetie," Esme whimpered, hugging Holly tighter. The room was filled with chaos, but it was the pleasant kind of chaos that seemed to make everything a little bit better.

"I'm so glad you're here," I cried into Dad's shoulder, and I heard Jasper slide into the chair next to me and slide his arm around the both of us, so we were all entwined, stronger together. I could hear him sobbing as well, and I closed my eyes, listening to the sad sounds that were ripping my family apart, but at the same time, pulling us together.

"Mom, Dad!" I heard Rosalie exclaim, and Cassie squealed in delight at seeing her grandparents. Rose dumped the tray of food she was carrying on the table, and walked towards the three of us, crouching down in front of us. "Everything will be okay," she whispered, and I cried harder.

"Edward?" I heard someone ask, their voice shaking. I looked up and saw Emmett standing in the doorway of the waiting room. "Charlie's gone home to pick up some stuff for Bells. I can't sit in there on my own. Will you come and sit with me?" I nodded hurriedly, wiping the tears away with the flats of my fingers. My Dad patted me on the back as I went, and Mom waved, singing Holly quietly back to sleep at the same time.

"Edward, do me a favour and don't tell Jacob about this," Emmett murmured. "He'd freak if he found out that you got to see her before he did. And I don't want to upset Bella by you two fighting." I nodded.

"Where is he?" I asked.

"He went with Charlie, he needs to get a change of clothes, and make sure his Dad's okay," I stared down at my own clothing, dried blood creasing it up. But there was no way I would ever leave Bella.

"How bad is she?" I asked.

"Her leg is pretty messed up, she's going to need crutches for a long time. But they think she'll be fine eventually. She's still asleep right now."

We took a left, and Emmett walked towards a door, pushing it open.

The first thing I noticed was the wires. Long plastic tubes going in and out of skin, and a huge bag of blood above her head. Things I had only really ever seen on television, things that weren't meant to be real, not yet. Then there was her. She lay in the middle of the bed, looking smaller than I'd ever seen her, looking smaller than she did at four years old. Her hair fanned around her like a halo. My angel.

I collapsed into a plastic chair next to the bed, and touched the limp, scratched hand that lay beside her. The heartbeat that was being projected around the room suddenly became ten times faster.

"Bella?" I whispered, picking her hand up and holding it in mine. "Bells, can you hear me? Bella?" Her heartbeat whirled around me, frantic beeping, and I squeezed her hand a little. "I love you," I whispered, and I clung to her fingers. I couldn't let go.

"She loves you so much, you know," Emmett murmured, and I looked at him. "I mean, you were four. No one expected it to be that serious. But she never really got over it. She never stopped loving you, even when she found Jake to take that little bit of hurt away,"

Bella suddenly stirred, and I gripped her hand even tighter. Her eyes opened, just the tiniest bit.

"Edward," she whispered.

"I'm here," I was crying again, but these were happier tears. She was awake. She was going to be okay.

"It doesn't hurt any more," she muttered. "Not with you here,"

"No Bells, that's the drugs, they'll stop you hurting,"

"I know what drugs do," she snapped, but it was so weak that I just smiled. "But it doesn't hurt like it used to. The hole in my heart… it's gone." I closed my eyes, letting the tears fall. "Hey," her voice was so quiet I could barely hear her. "Don't cry idiot." She reached up, her arm shaking a little, and she touched my face. "I love you," And her voice was so sweet and sincere that I leant down and kissed her softly on the lips right there. She giggled against my mouth.

"I'm sorry," I cried. "I'm sorry I ever hurt you,"

"It's okay," she whispered. "It's okay now," And I didn't know how it had gone from me reassuring her to the other way around, but it felt good. I felt incredibly selfish for thinking it, but it felt good. I squeezed her hand.

"What?" someone gasped at the door, and I stood up quickly to see Jacob staring at the two of us. He turned on his heel and ran in the opposite direction.

"I thought he went with Charlie!" I snapped at Emmett. But I was distracted by the swear words spewing out of Bella's mouth.

"Why do I have to hurt everyone?" she sobbed, pulling at the tubes that were stuck to her face and pushed into her arms. I grabbed her hands and held them in mine, and though she struggled, she was too weak to do anything.

"I should have died," she cried. "I should have died, and he wouldn't be hurt, this wouldn't have happened!"

"Bella!" I shouted, but she still struggled against me. I pulled her towards me and held her to my chest. She bawled into my t-shirt, and two nurses ran in, pushing something into her IV. She started to calm down, and her eyes closed a little.

"Talk to him for me Edward," she whispered as she sank back into sleep. Emmett swore.

"This is exactly what I didn't want happening to her," he groaned, as I lay her gently back on the bed and the nurses fussed around her. I ran out into the corridor, and the way Jacob had gone. It wasn't long until I'd found him in the waiting room. And I was greeted with a punch in the face.

**Holly POV**

I hadn't left Grandma Esme's arms since I'd met her. She smelt like cookies and bread, and her arms were so warm and toasty, that I just couldn't let go of her. She didn't seem to mind; she just kept whispering in my ear that she loved me, and wiped away the irregular tears that sometimes decided to appear. The waiting room was almost empty of people other than my family now; there was a woman with dark glasses on reading a magazine, and a couple tapping their feet, but no one else. I liked it better when there were less staring eyes, people wondering what on earth had happened to us.

It was quiet, until I heard the yelling. I sat up straight on Esme's lap, looking around me quickly, scared there would be more danger. But I found out where the yelling had come from when two boys ran into the room, shouting at each other, fingers held up in gun shapes. Cassie cried in excitement, and ran over to them, shouting their names. They were called Alex and Jamie; they each had a shock of messy, blonde hair, and were completely identical down to the number of stripes on their t-shirts. A woman ran in after them, looking flustered, her long blonde hair falling into her face.

"Alex, Jamie," she snapped. "If you don't behave there's going to be no sweets for a month." One of them stuck their tongue out at her. "Two months," she growled, and they immediately stopped, Cassie jumping in excitement around them. The woman looked around the room, smiling at my family. Her blue eyes focused in on me, and even when Rosalie hugged her, she didn't take her eyes off me. "Is that her?" I saw her whisper in Rosalie's ear, and she smiled and nodded. "Oh my god!" she cried, and ran towards me. I slid off Esme's lap, reluctant to let her go.

She gathered me into her arms and kissed my cheek.

"I'm Kate," she said gently. "I'm your godmother,"

"Hi," I murmured shyly, and she giggled.

"Well, you're certainly a lot quieter than my two!" She nodded towards the twins, who made faces at her. "God, I had begun to think this day would never come!" She leant back a little and looked at my face. "Oh… I hate him," she burst into tears. "You almost look worse than when I came out,"

"You're… you're that Kate?" I gasped, stepping back a little. She looked at me sadly, and I saw that unlike my Mom, she had some scars across her pale face. The white lines were barely noticeable, but they were there. She nodded. "You're Sasha's daughter Kate?" I whispered. She froze, her eyes confused.

"How do you know my Mom?" she asked. "She died, a long time ago," I closed my eyes, she didn't know the story. I wasn't sure if I could tell her.

"The reason you were taken in the first place," I murmured. "Was because my Mom's, mom turned James down. And he found out your Mom was pregnant with your older sister. He got beaten up because of it," She took a step back and collapsed into the plastic chair.

"Oh god," she whispered, putting her head in her hands. Jamie and Alex took advantage of the momentary distraction and ran out the room, Cassie following them and Rosalie racing after her. "That's why he took me and Alice?" she cried. I nodded. "Bastard," she choked out. "He did that to me because of my _Mom?_" And I realised Kate had been what I had been through, even worse than I had. So I ran towards her and threw my arms around her neck.

"I'm scared about Mom!" I sobbed. "She's still in surgery, and they don't know if she's going to live or not! He really hurt her!" Kate looked at my Dad, and I turned around to see he was crying again. Jacob ran into the room, bright red. He kicked a chair.

"Asshole!" he shouted.

"That better not be my brother you're talking about," Dad growled. But his suspicions were confirmed when Edward ran into the room after him. And Jacob turned around and hit him in the face. More fighting.

Edward put his hand to his bleeding lip, glaring at Jacob.

"Fighting over her is hurting her more!" he shouted. "You should have seen her after you left!"

"What, so I could see you two sucking face some more?" he bellowed. "No thanks, I'd rather not." My eyes widened. She was awake?

"Edward and Bella are back together again?" Kate whispered so that Jacob couldn't hear. "Thank god for that!" And I could have sworn I saw Esme grin.

"It's her choice!" Edward shouted. "And I'm happy with whoever she chooses, as long as _she _is happy!"

"She's not in a position to make that choice right now!" Jacob was practically screaming now. "And we _were _happy before you came and butted your huge nose into it,"

"I came to see Alice and Holly! And if I hadn't of been here, your 'girlfriend' could be dead right now!"

"Maybe she's better off dead than being with you!" he yelled, and the whole room went silent.

"You what?" Edward gasped.

"I… I didn't mean it," Jacob whispered, dropping his head. And all of a sudden, something huge flew towards him and started to punch every part of him.

"How. Dare. You. Say. That. About. My. Sister!" Emmett bellowed, knocking him to the floor. Everyone stood up. Emmett was so huge he could probably kill Jacob if we wanted to.

"Emmett!" I shrieked, but he didn't listen. Dad and Carlisle ran towards him, grabbing each arm and yanking him off Jacob. Edward stood frozen to the spot, his face white, his fists clenched. It looked like it was taking all his strength not to join Emmett, who was still trying to throw punches at the shell-shocked Jacob.

"Security!" one of the nurses called, and two huge men ran into the room and grabbed Emmett. They basically dragged him out of the room. I let out a tiny startled sob. Everything was falling apart.

"Mr Whitlock?" someone asked, and I saw the nurse at the door and my head snapped up. "Alice is out of surgery now. She's going to be okay." My eye's met my Dad's, and I knew his grin was identical to mine.

**A/N:**

**Yeah, so it's still not finished! But the next chapter will definitely be the last one! So Bella and Edward kissed :) Sorry it's taken so long to update, but I had really really bad writers block, I must have rewritten this five or six times! Plus I've had so much schoolwork to do, and I'm exhausted at the end of the day! But I'm ill today, and off school so I thought I'd finish writing this! And the Eclipse trailer came out today! I think it looks even better than New Moon! But I'm not sure about the new Victoria… What do you think?? This is one of the longest chapters in the story though! And Kate's back :) **


	42. Forevermore

**But the world can spin so madly****  
****And love can hurt so badly****  
****And stories end so sadly****  
****But this is not the end****  
****Cuz you still have my heartache****  
****and I still have your sweater****  
****And things they will get better****  
****Oh no, but not today.**

**Forevermore- Katie Herzig**

42. Forevermore

**Bella POV**

I opened my eyes slightly, and blinked. The couple of minutes when I had been awake rushed back to me. Jacob. Jacob had seen me and Edward. Oh shit. I looked around frantically, hoping he might be here; he might have forgiven me, thought that maybe it was just the drugs. Edward had his head on the edge of the bed, and was fast asleep. My Dad was on the other side of me, his face in his hands.

"Dad," I whispered. He looked at me. "Have you seen Jacob?" He shook his head.

"He was going to come back with me to see Billy, but he just called Sue in the end. I haven't seen him since. Oh Bells, I was scared I was going to lose you," I watched the tears fall quickly down his cheeks. I had never seen him cry before, and it scared me.

"I'm fine Dad," I muttered. "How's Alice? She's okay isn't she?"

"She's come out of surgery," he told me. "Jasper and Holly are with her now. They think she'll be okay. And your Mom's on the way. I called her." I nodded. Great. Mom was going to fuss ten times more than I needed right now.

"You sure you didn't even see Jacob when you came in?" I asked, and he shook his head. I couldn't believe what I'd done. I was a monster.

"Did something happen between you and Jacob?" he asked. I sighed.

"Something like that," I murmured, and I moved my left arm a little. Edward's head jerked up at the movement.

"Huh? Bella?" he gabbled as he woke up. I smiled a little. Somehow, Edward made all the hurt go away.

"Hey," I whispered, and understanding dawned on Charlie's face. I winced. I did not need my father telling me what a huge slut I was right now. But he was silent for a few seconds, and then stood up.

"I'm going to get a coffee," he told me, and walked out the room. I stared at Edward, he had a split lip, and a bruise was forming across his cheekbone.

"No!" I gasped. "Edward, you didn't fight him did you?" He shook his head slowly.

"He hit me, I didn't fight back," he told me gently. "But, um… Emmett might have been taken out by security for attacking him,"

"Emmett attacked him?" I gasped. He and Jacob had never had any problems before. "Why?"

"He was angry," he mumbled, staring at his blood stained sneakers. I sighed, knowing Edward wouldn't tell me the real reason. I closed my eyes.

"Everything is so messed up," I cried. Edward placed his hand on my cheek and I leant into it. It stung every cut, but I didn't care. I needed to feel him there. I deserved the pain.

"I'm not going to make you choose Bella," he said gently. "I don't care as long as you're happy," I stared into his mesmerizing emerald eyes, and for a second, I didn't have any doubt that I would choose Edward. I shook myself mentally. He left me. Jacob had been there my whole life, my best friend. I loved both of them. And for that, I didn't deserve either of them.

"I hate being fifteen," I grumbled. Edward chuckled dryly.

"Just know this," he dropped his voice, so that I had to strain my ears to hear him. "I will always love you, Isabella Marie Swan. Every second of forever." He stood up, leant down to kiss my forehead, and walked towards the door.

"Where are you going?" I asked quickly. "Don't leave me,"

"Jacob Black's outside waiting to talk to you," he explained. "I don't think it would be wise if I stayed." And sure enough, two seconds after he left the room, Jacob entered; an utterly destroyed expression on his face.

"I'm sorry Jake!" I cried. "I never meant for this to happen, and I'm so confused, and… and…"

He sighed, and dropped into one of the plastic chairs, burying his face in his hands.

"I knew it was always him," he muttered. "Even when you hadn't seen him since you were a kid, you still loved him more than I did."

"No…" I whispered, but he glared at me.

"Don't try to deny it Bella. I've always known I was second best." He snapped. I gulped. He was right. I had never been able to forget Edward. He closed his eyes, trying to calm down. "He said something earlier, and I haven't been able to forget it. He said he didn't care who you chose, as long as you were happy. Later I realised that this was upsetting you, fighting over you. So I'm going to let _you _choose Bella. This is your decision." I groaned. I thought chivalry was meant to be dead.

"I don't want to choose!" I wailed. "I somehow want you both to fight over me, because with my decision, I'm always going to hurt someone. It's not fair!" Jacob smiled weakly.

"But fighting is going to hurt you," he told me again. "I don't care if I get hurt, or if Edward gets hurt. All I care about it you Bells," he clutched my hand. "Remember that time when we went fishing with Charlie and Billy, when we were younger, and you fell in?" I nodded, shivering. I remembered the cold water rushing around me, going in my ears, my mouth. And I remembered Jacob jumping in to save me. And after Charlie managed to drag me out, Jacob didn't come up again.

"I was so scared you were going to die," I whispered. Charlie had jumped in, whilst Billy threw blankets over my shuddering body, and had managed to retrieve an unconscious Jacob. When I saw him in Charlie's arms, I had thought he was dead, and I screamed. They hadn't been able to stop my shrieking until Jacob's eyes opened again, water trickling out the sides of his mouth.

"When I was underwater, I thought I _was_ going to die. But then I realised it didn't matter, because my best friend was safe. I've always felt that way Bells, that as long as you're okay, nothing can go wrong. Now look at you," He gestured to my plastered leg. "When they told me you had gone, I was a wreck. And I've realised, that no matter what happens, I always want you as my friend. My _best _friend. Because I love you Bella. And I want what's best for you." I burst into tears, and he wiped the tears away.

The door clicked open, and Charlie walked in. Jacob looked up, and nodded at him.

"I'll leave you to think about it," he told me, walking towards the door. I waited until he was gone, and then sighed.

"Kill me now please," I asked Charlie. He raised his eyebrows. I could tell he was panicked by my tears. He had never been great with that kind of stuff. "Or at least distract me somehow, so that I'm not thinking about boys!"

"Your Mom called, she'll be here in two hours. And Emmett's trying to get me to sneak him in to see you," I giggled softly, and then sighed.

"You know Bella, sometimes you've got to learn to love what's good for you," Charlie murmured softly, stroking my hair back from my face. I groaned. Why couldn't Edward have come a year earlier, before Jacob and I were an item? It would have made things so much easier…

**Alice POV**

Colours swarmed around my mind, reds, blacks, greys. They smashed into one another and exploded. I didn't remember them being there before… In fact, I didn't remember anything since the pain.

"Her hand moved!" I heard Holly cry, and I struggled towards the light. Holly. She was here, she was fine. The light grew brighter and brighter, until the bottoms of my eyelids were a ruby red. I forced my eyes to open, and I heard Holly shriek excitedly. "Mom!" she cried, and she was kissing my forehead, my cheeks; her dark hair falling into my face.

"Hey baby," I whispered, and she grinned at me, her bruised face lighting up.

"Alice!" someone croaked, and I shifted my head a little to the left, even though it hurt like hell.

"Jazz," I whispered, and suddenly the pain was gone. He was really here. And he was smiling at me like I was the most beautiful thing in the world. I was home. "What happened," I gasped. "I thought I was going to die…"

"Don't you ever scare me like that again!" he growled. "You made _me _think you were going to die. The ambulance picked you up, and they weren't sure whether you were going to make it through or not. You were in surgery for hours, with bad internal bleeding. It's a miracle you're here," I smiled weakly, and reached out so I could clutch at his hand. He grabbed it, and held it tightly. "We were so scared Alice," he whispered.

"I love you," I replied simply. He leant down and kissed the hand that was in his grip.

"You missed everything!" Holly gabbled. "I've met Esme and Carlisle, and Kate and her twin sons, and I met Rosalie and Emmett and Cassie!"

"Kate's here?" I gasped. Jasper nodded, smiling. "And Esme and Carlisle? Well why aren't they in here? Get them all to come in here!"

"I can't!" he chuckled, and I scowled at him. "The nurse won't let anyone but me and Holly come in here. Visiting hours are in half an hour though."

"Good," I was tired, but I thought I could keep myself up to see everyone, especially Kate, who had been like a sister to me those last months in Biloxi.

"But Emmett can't come, he got kicked out," Holly piped up.

"What?" I gasped. My voice was getting frailer by the second, but I needed to stay awake. I needed to see everyone.

"He hit Jacob," she explained. "A lot."

"Good for him," I mumbled, and my eyes were closing.

"It's okay," Jasper whispered, pulling his chair forward and stroking my face. "Sleep. You need it," And I dozed off to Jasper's soft fingers caressing my face, and Holly's sweet voice chattering.

***

"Shush, don't wake her up!" someone hissed. I groaned; it was already a little too late for that. All the drugs had made me feel a little lightheaded, but the tiredness weighed my eyelids down, so I wasn't sure if I could lift them or not.

"I think you already did," someone else muttered, and I sighed, wrenching my eyes open.

"Alice!" Kate cried, grinning. "Long time no see,"

"Katie!" I exclaimed, and reached my arms up so she could lean down to hug me, even though it was difficult with the IV there. "I missed you!"

"I missed you too," she murmured. "I can't believe you just left like that, although I get why you did it," I didn't say anything, just clutched her to me, remembering what it was like to hug her. She let go of me, and I looked around the crowded room.

"Hey Edward," I whispered, waving weakly. "How's Bella?"

"She's fine," he told me. "She wants me to give this to you," He passed me a mobile, and I looked at the screen. One new message. _Text me when you wake up, love Bella x. _I grinned.

_Woken up, thanks to my very loud family ;) x _I texted back. Maggie was still clinging to Edward, and she grinned at me, her eyes tired, but happy.

Rosalie grinned at me from across the room, Cassie attached to her hip.

"Nice to see you finally awake," she smiled, and I pulled a face at her.

"I don't feel very awake," I mumbled, reaching my arm up to rub my eye and wincing when I touched the swollen skin. I looked at Kate's side, and saw the two boys who were standing very still, obviously on best behaviour, their white blonde hair messed up. "You must be Jamie and Alex," I smiled. "Wow… I missed so much. How old are you?"

"Six," one of them lisped. "Can I have chocolate now I was good Mommy?" Kate rolled her eyes and handed a bar of chocolate to each of them, and they rushed outside.

"I don't know what to do with those two," she muttered. The door was flung open, and Esme rushed into the room.

"Alice!" she cried, rushing over to plant a kiss on my forehead. Carlisle followed her, grinning at me.

"Hey Alice," he said gently. I smiled in response, I wasn't sure if I could even do any more talking. But I knew I had to when I noticed the three people who weren't here.

"Where's my Mom and Dad?" I rasped. "And Cynthia?"

"As soon as they heard what happened, they abandoned their holidays," Edward told me. "They're on their way home, your Mom and Dad should be here very soon, but Cynthia has to get a sixteen hour flight to get to Seattle, and then has to get a taxi here, so she won't be here for another couple of hours." I nodded, somehow unable to wait when they got here. I missed my parents and my little sister, despite what had happened with James. The phone I had grasped in my hand beeped again, and my arm flashed up so I could read it, I winced when my IV pulled a little.

_Thank god you're okay Ali! Sorry I can't be there with you. Considering escaping from the hospital bed. What do you think?x _I grinned.

_I don't think it would be clever. Is your Dad with you? Did your Mom come down? _

_ Yup and yup, _she texted back quickly. _Mom's telling me to stop texting in my "condition". Sorry I'm not there. love you x _I put the phone down, and felt my eyelids start to droop again. I looked around for Jasper, and reached out for his hand. Holly was asleep in his lap, her head lolling against his chest.

"Love you," I mumbled, my voice thick with sleep, and I felt myself dozing off again.

***

When I next woke up, the room was quiet again.

"Hey, you," Jasper grinned, and I closed my eyes, happy to hear his beautiful voice.

"Where's Holly?" I asked.

"She's gone to see Bella, she'll be annoyed when she finds out you were awake without her again,"

"I'm not so tired anymore," I mumbled. "I can wait for her," he chuckled, pulling his fingers through my long knotty hair. I grimaced. "I can't wait to cut it short again," I grumbled. "I hate it long,"

"It's beautiful whatever length," Jasper murmured, and I smiled at him. "Had it always been short before you grew it long? I never asked you?" I shook my head and gulped.

"It was long when James first took me," I whispered, trying not to remember, but it all came rushing back.

_I stared at my reflection. My face was cut up and bruised, my lips chapped, my skin white. They kept expecting me to say something. I wasn't going to. They couldn't make me. I pulled my fingers through my long hair over and over, until I was pulling so hard that little strands of it were ripped out. I remembered him tugging at it, dragging me across the room with it, ripping strands out just like I was doing now. My hair was memories of hurt. I didn't want it any more. I picked up the pain of sewing scissors I had found in Mom's handbag, and held them to my head. Strands of hair fell to the floor. It was different in films, when they fell gracefully, and lay in locks. My hair went everywhere, all over the cold tiles. But it felt good. I had control. The cold air reached my scalp, and I smiled, cutting. The scissors made a pleasant _snip _sound against my hair, over and over again. Once I was finished, I admired my handiwork. It looked kind of cool. Like I was some kind of punk chick or something. The tiny amount of hair I had left was like uneven bristles over my head. I ran my hands through it, revelling in it's shortness. _

_ "Alice!" Mom yelled, banging on the door. "Alice what are you doing in there? Have you got my sewing scissors? Ali… you're not… you're not cutting yourself?" I heard her gasp at the possibility, and all of a sudden I could hear the lock that could easily be picked from the outside, clicking. The door swung open, and she screamed. "What have you done to your hair?" she shrieked. _

"It grew back quickly," I told Jasper. "But I never wanted it long again. I was happier with it short, although not as short as I had cut it in the first place. I realised it was less punk, and more boy." He chuckled, and then frowned.

"I can't believe he made you feel that bad," he choked, and I realised he was close to tears. I realised that I was exactly the same. "That you felt you couldn't even have your hair." And all of a sudden, everything that had happened over the last few days rushed over me all at once. I burst into tears.

Jasper took one look at me, got up from his chair, and perched on the side of my mattress, bending forwards to kiss my sore lips.

"I'm sorry," I wailed. "It just… I hate it. And I'm so glad it's over, but the memories will always be there,"

"Don't be sorry," he said gently. "I've had lots of crying over the past days, your tears aren't exactly out of the ordinary. And your reason for crying is more acceptable than anyone's in this place, including mine. He's ruined parts of your life Ali, and I hate him for that." I grabbed the front of his t-shirt, holding him near me. I couldn't bear for him to be further away than he was now.

"I love you." I whispered. "I need you so much right now. I'm so glad that you're here, that you're alive. I thought I was never going to see you again before I got here," He smiled, kissing me again.

"I love you too, and I'm glad I found you," he murmured against my mouth.

The door flung open, and two people ran in. I groaned. I had been waiting for them to come, but this was the worst moment for them to.

"Hey Mom, hey Dad," I mumbled, as Jasper sat back down hurriedly.

"Alice!" Mom shrieked, running towards me, and freezing when she saw me. She reached her hand out towards my face, and then drew it back, her face horrified.

"Do I look that bad?" I joked, but secretly I was worrying. What was wrong with my face? She sighed, and collapsed into the chair.

"I got so caught up in seeing you again that I forgot that you would be so hurt, so… broken. It was a shock, that's all. I missed you so much baby," I smiled at her.

"Thanks for all the money," I murmured. "I don't think I could have coped without it."  
"It was the least we could do, for you and Holly," Dad told me, walking towards me, smiling.

"Where is Holly?" my Mom asked me quickly. "She's okay isn't she?"

"She's with Bella," I reassured her. "Mom…" I didn't know if I should tell her about James. It would just upset both of them. But I knew photos and details would be in newspapers soon. I had to tell them both. "James, the guy that took me, you knew him,"

"What?" my Dad gasped.

"He went to high school with you both" I mumbled, and Mom gasped, her hand flying up to cover her mouth. Dad clicked in an instant. He swore, and my Mom burst into tears.

"It's all my fault! You must hate me!" she sobbed. I reached out and touched her hand, sending a pleading glance at Jasper. I needed help right now.

"It's not your fault," I said gently. "He was crazy, and sadistic, and anything anyone did to him could have ended in this. I'm not mad at you, and I definitely don't hate you." She carried on crying, and I sighed. My Dad was silent in the corner, his face a perfect picture of shock. I wiped away the tears that I realised still lingered on my face from where I'd been crying before.

"Excuse me, you're not meant to be in here…" a nurse chastised, walking into the room.

"But I'm her Mom," she exclaimed.

"I need Jasper to stay," I argued. "And Holly should be coming back soon. Mom, you can't stay here. I can only have two people in here. I'll talk with you during visiting hours, but I'm not making Jazz and Holly go." She nodded; looking a little hurt, and strode out the room. My Dad waved at me a little, and then followed her, still looking shocked. I sighed.

"She's not going to forgive herself," I grumbled. Jasper came and sat on the bed again; touching each bruise he could see as lightly as he could.

"She will eventually," he murmured, his soft voice soothing me so I could calm down just a little bit. He picked up my hand and toyed with the diamond ring that had stayed glued to my finger for the last ten years.

"You kept it," he wondered.

"Of course I did," I exclaimed. "I could never get rid of it, even though I thought you were dead. I never stopped loving you Jasper," He smiled, and kissed me again.

"You still want it to happen then?" he trod carefully, obviously scared of saying something wrong. "You still want to get married?"

"Do you?" I asked fearfully, and all of a sudden he grinned. His beautiful grin that lit up his face, the one I had been waiting for all day to tell me everything was alright. He slipped the ring off my finger, and I took a sharp intake of breath. He didn't want to get married. The thought hurt, but I knew it had been a long time. But then he slid off the bed, and onto the floor, crouching on one knee.

"Alice Mary Brandon. I will love you, always. And I know this is the second time, but it's been so long, and our love has grown so much, that I know I have to ask again. We've shown that we can be together, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, loving and cherishing. And even death can't part us. Alice. Will you marry me?" I giggled, and reached out to stroke his face.

"Of course," I laughed, and he jumped up, leaning over the bed to kiss me quickly. And from the door, Holly gave a tiny, excited squeak.

**A/N**

**Yesss my longest chapter EVER is my last one! This took me so long to write, but I'm pleased with it. I know Bella's decision isn't in here, but… that'll be in the epilogue xD Go have a look. My extra long goodbye AN will be there too! If you haven't got me on author alert, I've posted**


	43. Epilogue New Start

**EPILOGUE**

"She didn't! No way, I can't believe you said that!" Bella gasped down the phone, and I snorted at how incredibly teenage-like she sounded. I still had to get my head around the idea of her being higher than my waist. It was Jacob on the phone; she was always talking to him-except when Edward was around of course. Everyone had noticed the sour look that appeared on his face when Jacob was mentioned, even though Bella and Jake were just best friends now, although Jacob still wanted it to be more.

"Alice! Jamie hit me!" Alex wailed.

"Cynthia… I can't cope with them while I'm driving," I pleaded. She rolled her eyes at me in the car mirror, but grinned and began to sort out the argument that was fast growing into shouting. I sighed. I couldn't believe I had offered to drive everyone to school. I had passed my driving test easily, and had wanted to do an ordinary Mom thing like taking kids to school. I now realised why every mother hated it.

"Mom, I'm scared. What if no one likes me?" Holly whimpered from next to me.

"Holly, you'll be fine, everyone will like you. Who have you met that doesn't? It's Bella's first day too, it's always the hardest one of them all."

"But Bella has Edward and Maggie!" she wailed. "And I only have the twins, and I'll look stupid hanging out with first graders,"

"Hey!" Jamie shouted.

"Holly honey, everything will be fine. And you can come home, and Dad and I will take you out for ice cream, and you can tell us about your day, and all the friends you made." We pulled up outside the high school, and Cynthia jumped out, waving goodbye to me and running over to join her group of friends. Edward ran towards us as soon as he saw the car, opening the door for Bella, and helping her get out. She leant on her crutches, batting him away.

"I can do it!" she cried, struggling until she had gotten out by herself. People were looking, obviously wondering who the scarred new girl on crutches was. She bit her lip. "Why are they all staring?" she whispered, and Edward chuckled, kissing her softly on the lips.

"Because they're all thinking how beautiful you are," he told her. She rolled her eyes.

"I better be able to come along for that ice cream," she waggled her eyebrows at me. "Charlie's working late, settling into the new job here and all, and I need to rant at someone about my horrible day which was only made a little bit better by my perfect boyfriend," I laughed.

"Hey, what about me?" Maggie laughed, joining the couple. "I have to make it a little bit better!"

"Well…" Bella teased. "Maybe not as much as Edward," Maggie stuck her tongue out at her, and they became engaged in conversation about classes, and whether they would be in the same ones. I laughed.

"See you later for ice cream Bells!" I called, and drove off, hoping Bella would be okay.

"I don't want to go," Holly whispered, her blue eyes filling with tears.

"Hey, don't cry baby," I murmured. "It's just school. I know you're brave, and can get through this," She bit her lip, and nodded. The elementary school wasn't far from the high school, and we got to it quickly.

"I'll walk you in," I told her, and Jamie and Alex jumped out of the car and went to join their group of boisterous friends without even waving. I rolled my eyes. They were sweet underneath the troublesome coating, but you had to dig deep to find it.

I looked around the reception area, remembering it from the far off times of elementary school. I felt so _old _seeing it all. It just seemed so long ago.

"You must be Holly!" the elderly receptionist cooed. "I'll just call Miss Beesley, she'll be your form teacher. She nodded quietly, and reached for my hand. We waited a couple of minutes, and a young brunette woman walked into the room, a tiny girl with dirty blond plaits at her side.

"Hello Holly, I'm Miss Beesley. This is Rachael, she'll be looking after you today." Rachael waved, and grinned, showing off two missing front teeth.

"Hi," Holly whispered meekly.

"It's okay, it's natural to be a bit scared," Miss Beesley reassured her. "Do you like music? It'll be your first class today!" Slowly a smile spread over Holly's face. She nodded.

"My uncle Edward is teaching me to play piano," she told her, and Rachael beamed.

"I play piano too!" she exclaimed. "But only nursery rhymes so far, I just started," And just like that, I knew Holly would have a friend in this little girl. I bent down and kissed her on the head.

"I have to go now sweetie, will you be okay?" I asked. She nodded, a little happier now. I waved as I walked out the door, worrying a little. I had never felt more like a Mom. Thousands of images were playing over in my head, things that had happened to me at school. I sighed. I guessed there was no telling what would happen until she got home. It was no use wrapping her in cotton wool forever. My phone rang, and I answered it.

"I'm taking you dress shopping!" Rosalie insisted.

"Fine," I laughed. "But it has to be designer and custom made. And I don't care if I'm not a virgin; it has to be white, and classic. But with a hint of modern at the same time."

"Of course!" she laughed. "Kate's coming too, and Esme. I'm leaving Cass with Emmett; he can take care of her for a few hours without flushing her down the toilet or anything stupid like that,"

"Okay, I'll pick you up at 11, at your house," I told her. "I'm going to go home and see Jasper before I go, he was asleep when I left,"  
"This is where it starts, he'll be asleep, and you'll be doing all the work," she warned, and she hung up. I laughed, and climbed into my borrowed people carrier. Esme had leant it to me, because I couldn't take everyone in my Porsche. I dug into my bag, and pulled out the piece of paper, grinning at it like I had every day for the past week. There was a lot of writing, but the general gist of it was that they liked my drawings, and were giving me a loan to start my own business. Along with it were several sketches of shoes, dresses and some jackets. Needing to go to fashion college was all a lie. I had made my own way in the business.

The Mississippi sun was fading, ready to retreat into rain. I basked in the last of it, warming my pale, scarred skin. It was strange how the last ten years had felt like a dream, I had finally woken up.

I pulled up outside the little house Esme had renovated for Jasper and I, and walked through the garden, revelling in the smell of the last flowers of the season. And as soon as I opened the door, I was met with Jasper leaping at me, and kissing me.

"Boo," he laughed. I grinned. I was home.

**A/N: **

**Nooo it can't be! It's over! ****I've been writing this story since June, and the time has gone SO quick! And I can't believe how many reviews I've had since then! I mean, 1197 so far. That is AMAZING! Thank you to you all, you're all seriously fantastic, I don't know what I'd do without you. If you haven't got me on author alert, I've posted a new story, it's called Amnesia. But anyway, the epilogue just tied everything up I think. Am I allowed an epilogue without a prologue? Ahh well, don't know, don't care lol! I'm really really sorry you've had to wait so long for each chapter, it's very different from the beginning where I was posting one a day, but as my work load got heavier, my updates got longer. Did anyone like Jasper's proposal? I thought it was really sweet, if I do say so myself. Just wow… I never thought this story would get so big. I was writing stories before that had 30 reviews max, and wow… This is seriously so so flattering. Pleeeeease go read my new story. It's more vampiry and magical :) And has a lot more evil people in it *cough*Volturi*cough*. I love every single one of you. Thanks for sticking with me, even through my gigantic leaps through time ;) **

**On another note, who has the New Moon DVD?? *dies* I got it the day before it came out in the US, three days before it came out in the UK. Amazon got it wrong :L **

**Love youuuuu**

**Natalie xxxxxxxxxxxx**


	44. AN People are bitches

**A/N: **

***cries* oh my god. I need your help. I hate plagiarism. This person has stolen my story, and put it on a website called Wattpad, changing names. I've reported it, but I think she needs to get a proper punishment if you know what I mean. I'm not a nasty person, but this has made me SO angry that I would love you all so much if you went over there and had a little shout at her and report her aswell ;) I'll put the link up on my profile :D I'm am so upset, and I HATE people like this. It just ruined my day, she's getting credit for something I worked incredibly hard on :( **

**Thanks, and thanks to the people who are STILL reviewing :)**

**Love Natalie x**

**Update: the website was amazing and removed it for me straight away :) So don't worry. Thanks anyway. **


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